chapter rating: teen/pg-13
ship: maya/lucas | riley&maya brotp
prompt: angst
word count: 1,507
summary: lucas and maya are ready to be together, but first they have to tell riley.

it will be okay (in the end)

Riley is staring at them with tears in her eyes. Her lower lip wobbles and her breath catches. "What?"

"It just happened. I…" Lucas shook his head. "We wanted to talk to you first."

"Talk to me?" She looks between them, her brow furrowed. They're not touching, but they're close. Maya just a few inches behind Lucas, wringing her hands, and him, standing so tall and serious, his chin tilted, like he expects a fight. And part of her wants to give him one. "But we decided… Years ago, we figured this out."

"That was before…" Maya's voice is uncharacteristically weak and quiet, like a whisper she's not sure she wants to be heard.

"Before what?" Riley blinks back her tears and glares at them. "Before you went behind my back?"

"You and me, we aren't together. We haven't been for a long time," Lucas says.

And yes, okay, that's true, but… It's temporary. They break up sometimes but they figure it out, because that's what people do when they love someone. They fight but it's okay, because as long as they have each other, they can make it work.

"We always get back together." Riley's staring at him now, willing him to understand, to take this back. To rewind to a few minutes ago, before the love of her life and her best friend announced that they wanted to be together, that they cared about each other.

Taking a deep breath, she steps forward and peers up at him. "How many times have we broken up?"

He sighs, shoulders slumping. "Six."

"And how many times have we made up?"

"Five."

"Right. Because we love each other. Because we fight but we work it out, because sometimes I'm too much and sometimes you're not enough and sometimes… Sometimes…" She trails off for a moment, because that's not right. That didn't sound right. "Wait. I– I didn't mean…"

But Lucas doesn't look mad, he looks knowing. And somehow that's worse.

Riley blinks, her certainty of before beginning to piece away, and she turns. "Maya…?"

Maya looks hopeful. "Yeah?"

"Tell me this is a dream. Tell me I'm asleep and this isn't happening and you aren't here and you and Lucas aren't…"

Maya blinks fast against her own tears. "I can't… I can't tell you that."

"Why?"

"Because. We don't lie to each other."

Riley feels her heart crack and she wraps her arms around herself. "I don't understand. I… I did everything right. I was a good person. I do good things. I lovedyou."

"You are. You did." Lucas nods. "Riley, it's not that I don't care about you. You're one of my best friends, and I… I hope you always will be. But… I'm not your Prince Charming. I'm not who you need."

She shakes her head. "But that's not how it goes. That's not… right."

"Who says what's right? Maybe you don't meet your soul mate on the subway or when you're thirteen. Maybe you meet them later. Maybe they're just not who you think they are." Maya half-smiles at her. "Riley, Lucas isn't the be all, end all of your life. He's just a boy. Just one boy."

"Well, what is he to you? Why do you get to have him?" she bites out, angry and sad and defensive.

"He's not a prize, Riles. I didn't win him…" Maya bites her lip and hesitates for a moment. She takes a step forward until she's right up against Lucas. Her hand finds his, fingers folding together, and the other wraps loose around his wrist to slide up his forearm. It should look possessive, but it mostly looks grounding. A mutual anchor. "I don't want to hurt you. I never want to hurt you. But I like Lucas. I– I really do. And I know that right now that feels like having your heart ripped out. I know that right now you might h-hate me, but…" She stops, and tips her head back to clear her tears. It doesn't work and one falls down her cheek.

Riley is hurt. She wants to yell and scream and throw them out. But another part of her wants to reach out and wipe away Maya's tears, tell her no, no she could never hate her. She's caught between the two, and so she stays rooted on the spot.

"Riley?" It's Lucas, inching her along, searching for what? Approval? Disapproval? Hatred? Forgiveness?

Finally, Riley takes a deep breath. "I think you should go."

Maya looks stricken, but instead of letting Lucas go, she only seems to hold on tighter. "Riley… Honey…"

"Stop. Please." She waves her hands at them. "I don't hate you. I don't. But… I'm hurt and I'm angry and I really just want to cry. So please, just… Just go."

They linger a moment, and Riley can feel her throat tightening and her eyes burning and she doesn't want to do this in front of them. But usually Maya would stay. Maya would hold her and pet her hair and tell her it's all going to be okay. Only Maya's part of the reason she's hurt so she can't stay. She can't make this better.

Finally, Lucas moves. He nods, silently, and turns to the door, towing Maya along with him. And for a moment, Riley is angry. Not at Maya, but at Lucas, because he gets to leave with Maya when she was Riley's first. Riley's always.

The door closes behind them and she goes to the bay window, slumps down and hugs a pillow against her stomach. And she cries. Of course she cries. She struggles to breathe and her nose runs and she probably looks like a mess. But it's good, it's cathartic, it's exactly what she needs.

Her mom checks on her, her dad too. Auggie drops in just to tell her to 'get it together, sister.' She throws a pillow at his head. Riley skips dinner and stays in her room, asking herself what went wrong. What she did or didn't do. Why things didn't work out the way she wanted or expected. How this is going to work now. She doesn't have any answers.

It's after ten when her window cracks open and a familiar blonde crawls inside.

"I know I'm probably the last person you want to see, but… I really hurt my best friend and I feel like a jerk and the only person I can really talk to about that is you. I figure you might feel the same and… If you want me to leave, I will, but if you want me to stay… We can talk or not talk or you can tell me what a crap friend I am, whatever makes you feel better."

Riley kind of wants to tell her to go. She wants to be mad and vengeful and to put it all on Maya. But another part of Riley, a much bigger part of her, wants Maya to stay, wants them to be who they were before. So instead, she moves over on the bench, and watches from the corner of her eyes as Maya takes a seat beside her.

It's quiet at first, tense and awkward. But then Riley leans over and puts her head on Maya's shoulder. "Was it me?" she whispers.

"No." Maya wraps both arms around Riley and squeezes. "You tried, you tried really hard. Sometimes people fall out of love, and that's okay." She rubs Riley's back. "Be honest, weren't you tired of it? Fighting, breaking up, putting it all back together."

Riley lets out a heavy sigh. "Maybe."

"I should've talked to you first. Told you that I still had feelings for him. I should've been honest with you."

"So you're really together now? You and Lucas, a real couple."

"Yeah. I– I guess. We're still figuring it out. It's new and a little weird and… Part of me wants to scrap the whole thing. If it's going to hurt you. If you want me to. But another part of me really likes him and I think we could be good together."

Riley rubs her cheek against Maya's shoulder. "It's gonna be weird for a while. For me. But… Don't break up, not because of me. I'm not happy about it. I don't know how I feel, exactly, but… I want you to be happy. More than anything."

"You're a good person, Riles." Mays presses her head down against Riley's. "What'd I ever do to deserve you? Huh?"

Riley wraps her arms around Maya and holds on tight. "Will you pet my hair and tell me it's all going to be okay?"

Maya presses a kiss to the top of Riley's head and then lets her fingers stroke her hair. "Hey?"

"Yeah?" she whispers.

"It's all gonna be okay. I promise."

Riley takes a deep, shuddery breath, and lets it out on a sigh. It still hurts, and it will for a while, but she thinks Maya's right. It'll take time, but it's going to be okay. She will be okay.