Decided to do more of these, to distract myself from stuff. Group chat with some TMI characters, because I can. This is even stupider than last time... And I'm writing this from my phone, so wish me luck. Never tried to upload from my phone...
Disclaimer: I don't own the Mortal Instruments.
*commenting on a photo of Alec, Magnus, Izzy and Jace that Alec posted*
Izzy: I like that random kid in the back.
Magnus: He was the real reason for the mphoto.
Izzy: We photographed that kid so hard.
Magnus: That means anal.
Izzy: That doesn't even make sense.
Magnus: It does if the kid is a porn star.
Izzy: He looks a bit young.
Magnus: Kids these days...
Alec: Guys...
Izzy: I tried to keep the peace. I refuse to take the blame for this.
Alec: Nope. Your fault.
Magnus: I don't know who else the blame could fall on.
Izzy: Definitely not the only person who said anything that was demonstrably inappropriate. (I'm looking at you, Magnus)
Magnus: No. Surely, not that guy.
Jace: Penis.
Izzy: Keeping it classy, Jace.
Magnus: That only works when you scream it in public, Jace. Putting it in the comments is not the same.
Jace: Made me laugh.
Magnus: Laughing is usually the result of you putting your penis in things.
Izzy: In all seriousness, we need to find that kid so we can all see a movie. It would be glorious.
Magnus: For us, it would be. But for the poor people trying to enjoy a movie peacefully...
Izzy: Poor Alec. We're blowing up his notifications.
Magnus: Sorry, Alexander!
Jace: I'm not.
Izzy: Neither am I. He asked for this when he posted this picture.
Magnus: Wow, at least I had the decency to lie.
*Isabelle Lightwood started a group chat with Magnus Bane and Jace Herondale*
Izzy: Yoooooooo!
Jace: GUYS!
Magnus: Yes, dear?
Jace: Don't call me dear, ya freak.
Magnus: I'll call you whatever I want!
Jace: No, you certainly will not.
Magnus: It clearly made you uncomfortable. You know how much I love doing that.
Jace: Shut it, knobby. You don't know things.
Magnus: I know all of the things. Except why Alexander isn't in this group...
*Magnus Bane added Alexander Lightwood*
Magnus: Now he is! Hi Alexander!
Alec: Hi. I'm about to go to bed. Sorry I kissed out on everything.
Alec: Missed, not kissed. Stupid keyboard.
Magnus: The keyboard wants to kiss Alec...
Izzy: Magnus wants to kiss Alec. And he wasn't in the group so that we would stop blowing up his notifications on that photo. So, good job.
Magus: He's part of the group, so he suffers with the group.
Jace: Where's Clary, then?
*Jace Herondale added Clary Fray*
Jace: Hey, Clary!
Clary: ... What is this?
Magnus: I pissed in a Gatorade bottle this morning, so I wouldn't have to get out of bed. I poured the urine out the window.
Magnus: Oh, hey Clary...
Izzy: Gross.
Clary: ... Why am I here?
Jace: The group suffers together.
*Isabelle Lightwood added Simon Lewis*
Izzy: We're all here, now.
Simon: What's happening?
Clary: I have no idea.
Magnus: Is anyone else taking a shit right now?
Izzy: Hahahaha. No, I'm lying in bed.
Jace: Same.
Clary: Me too.
Simon: ^^
Alec: Uh, yeah... So am I... In bed.
Magnus: That's convincing.
Clary: He's either pooping too, or doing something unmentionable in bed...
Jace: Spanking the monkey, Alec?
Simon: Jerking it with tweezers?
Alec: No. Five chicks. Got help.
Clary: Five pics of Magnus*
Izzy: Do they all have their own tweezers, or are they sharing?
Simon: Hahahahahaha... Haha... Ha...
Jace: Simon, why are you still here? Don't have have octopus porn to watch?
Simon: ... Oh, right. Let me get back to that.
Izzy: I love you, Simon. XD
Simon: You're not so bad, yourself. ;)
Magnus: Ew, go flirt in private.
Alec: I stepped away for two minutes... I love you guys, you're awful.
Magnus: What can I do to improve my erection?
Alec: Okay, I'll bite. What about it needs improving?
Jace: You'll bite? How is that going to improve his erection?
Clary: Alec, Magnus... You two should get a room. So you can bite each other.
Magnus: Anything Alexander does with his mouth would improve my erection
Izzy: Guys... Ew.
Alec: ...
Magnus: ;)
Clary: ...
Simon: ...
Jace: ...
Magnus: :D
Alec: Isabelle is being a pill.
Alec: Wait.
Alec: Oh fuck.
Alec: I didn't mean to say this in the group chat. Send help.
Clary: Good luck, Alec!
Magnus: Alexander! Run!
Jace: Run away and never look back.
Magnus: Alec? Are you okay?
Simon: Are you alive?
Izzy: Alec can't talk right now.
Clary: Oh snap.
Jace: Go easy on him.
Magnus: I'm coming over.
Magnus: She was throwing darts at him.
Jace: Of course she was.
Alec: Thank you, Magnus...
Magnus: Any time, Babycakes.
Alec: She had an axe.
Izzy: I was just going to scare him.
Simon: Iz...
Clary: You're kind of my hero.
Jace: Alec, do you want to stay with me until you can get a restraining order?
Alec: Yes, please.
Izzy: :D
Simon: My girlfriend is always so happy with herself when she's being a dick.
Alec: GIRLFRIEND!?
Simon: ...
Izzy: ... This wasn't how I planned to tell him, Simon.
Alec: Am I the only one who didn't know about this?
Alec: Simon, I will kill you.
Jace: I didn't know.
Clary: I knew...
Magnus: I thought it was obvious...
Izzy: Whoops.
Jace: If I asked Clary to see a movie, do you think she would say yes?
Simon: You asked that in the group chat, Jace. She's gonna see that.
Jace: Oh fuck.
Jace: Hi, Clary...
Isabelle: ASK HER. OTP.
Magnus: I ship it.
Clary:Finally!
Jace: What?!
Alec: I'm so glad I'm not the only one who accidentally messages everyone...
Simon: Yeah, who were you trying to send it to?
Jace: You...
Simon: Jace Wayland asked me for girl advice!
Jace: Well, she's your best friend. I thought you might know...
Simon: I do know.
Jace: AND!?
Simon: Ask her, idiot.
Clary: :)
Jace: SHE SAID YES.
Izzy: OTP!
Alec: Thats great!
Clary: I diiiiid.
Magnus: Izzy, do you know what this means!?
Izzy: Clary, we're going shopping!
Simon: Your taste in men is questionable.
Jace: Go away, Semen!
Jace: Simon* sorry.
Magnus: How many cats constitutes as being married?
Clary: Seven.
Isabelle: I agree. Seven seems good.
Alec: Why do you ask?
Magnus: My mom said I could get a mannequin modeled as Ryan Gosling when I'm married.
Clary: Why would you want that?
Magnus: Why wouldn't anyone want that?
Okay... I'm done. That's all. Bye guys.
-IWriteNaked