I can't stop. It's a disease.
Disclaimer: I don't own the Mortal Instruments. I didn't even make these conversations up. I just participated in them, and changed the names.
*Isabelle has changed the group name to Yes Homo.*
Jordan: :D
Isabelle: It felt right.
Jace: I'm not sure about that one…
Alec: I thought it was funny.
Jordan: I'm a fan.
Jace: Of course, homoism is your expertise.
Jace: By the way, I leave to California this Friday night…
Isabelle: Boo, you who're.
Isabelle: Whore*
Isabelle: Fucking autocorrect, ruining my insults…
Jordan: Well, fuck you too, queer ass little bitch. Nobody loves you here, anyways… FUCK YOU. :'(
Alec: Now you've hurt Jordan.
Isabelle: Look what you've done, Jace…
Alec: t(-_-)/
Isabelle: ┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐
Jace: Izzy, that is the…best emoji ever. I'm adding that to my notes, to use often.
Isabelle: Yesssssss.
Jace: I'm sorry, guys, but I have to go to school, and I just need a break from my yard. It's hard when you don't get along with anyone in your family, and never have a place to live for longer than a few days at a time. I need a break, and I've got a place to live there. I'm going to miss you guys.
Isabelle: I understand. It just sucks.
Alec: We love you, Jace.
Isabelle: We'll just have to come visit you.
Jace: Yeah, I know. I love you guys, too. I'm sorry again.
Isabelle: We all love you. Except Jordan, who is now broken.
Jace: I'm sorry, Jordan… I'll let you touch my butt, if you want.
A: … Dude. Don't prostitute yourself like that. He will stick it in… You've opened the proverbial door.
Isabelle: He really will stick it in…
Jace: I'm joking! Calm down. I just thought I would give Jordan the thought of being happy. I'll just make sure there's a wall between us.
Isabelle: Sure, give him happiness and then rip it away…
Alec: Right? Wow, Jace…
Jordan: Well, you could stay with me and I can fuck you on a regular basis, and no one has to know…
Alec: At least blow him.
Isabelle: At the very least… Minimum…
Alec: Right.
Jace: I'm not going to blow him, but I've got a friend who would be happy to help… I'll give him a call.
Isabelle: You can't leave your lover behind.
Jordan: I only go queer for Jace.
Jace: He's more than willing…
Jordan: Won't work. It's only you or the pussy for me.
Isabelle: Ew. Don't use the P word.
Isabelle: Hate.
Isabelle: H8.
Jordan: You've been inside a unicorn, which is why I believe you are sexually gifted.
Magnus: HE WAS INSIDE A UNICORN?!
Alec: I had a stuffed unicorn… I cut a hole in the butt, and dared him to fuck it.
Jace: It was great for me.
Isabelle: We all need to hang out one last time…
Jordan: A blowjob with an audience is in order.
Jace: We could hang out Thursday evening.
Jace: Audience blowjob? No agreement, sorry.
Isabelle: Party pooper.
Jordan: They want to watch, Jace.
Isabelle: We really do.
Jordan: We have a bet on whether or not you ejaculate rainbows…
Jace: …
Isabelle: We know he ejaculates rainbows. We have a bet on which colors are included.
Jordan: We all need to see you ejaculate.
Jace: I'll send you a video.
Isabelle: Thank you.
Isabelle: Request: Use the unicorn.
Jordan: Please…for us…
Jace: Probably not…
Isabelle: He totally still has it.
Alec: At least let us have the unicorn for smelling purposes…
Isabelle: Oh God.
Jordan: I'll fuck it if I see it…
Isabelle: Same.
Jace: You guys are terrible.
Alec: You're welcome.
Isabelle: You love us.
Isabelle: Almost as much as you love the unicorn.
Isabelle: ALMOST.
Isabelle: But not quite.
This one is for David (appearing as Jace), John (appearing as Jordan), and Joe the Hoe (Appearing as Alec, while I appear as Isabelle…) I love you and this conversation killed me. You made it into Brohomie for the second time. (Third for Joe!) That's an accomplishment, if you ask me…
Leave us the unicorn, Dave…
-Ashtray
PS: I'm working on Reckless Abandon, and I'm sorry it's taking so long. I've had so many personal emergencies lately, I just haven't had the energy to work on it, but it's in progress now and will hopefully be up soon. Sorry! I love you guys.