Tony plays with Pete until Jarvis announces Rhodey's arrival a couple of hours later. He gets up from the floor to greet the lift,

'Hey,' he offers Rhodey a grin and pulls him into a quick hug, 'it's good to see you.'

'You too,' he grins back. 'How's it going?'

'Oh, pretty normal,' Tony pulls away still grinning, 'I have a clone, I'm expecting another child with a man who doesn't know about it, Steve managed to reveal the existence of my kid to the world during a press conference on green energy, I accused Captain America of child abuse and nearly had my AI shoot him in the head.'

'I...' Rhodey stares at him.

'In other news I'm rolling out arc reactor power to all of my facilities, I think Jarvis may have bought every children's film on the planet, including the ones not in English, and I have a new Audi.'

'Tony...'

'Here, meet your nephew,' Tony grins and waves to Pete. 'Pete, meet uncle Rhodey.'

'You nearly shot... Hey there!' he cuts himself off as he greets Pete. 'It's great to finally meet you, kiddo.'

'Hi,' Pete smiles up at him. 'Dada says we can give you upgrades.'

'Upgrades, huh?'

'Yes,' Pete nods.

'I've got a software patch for you,' Tony confirms. 'And a new phone.'

'Great!' Rhodey's grin looks a little wild around the edges.

'Come on,' Tony pats him the shoulder and nudges him back to the lift. 'Let's go to the workshop.'

'Yeah!' Pete grins and jumps in ahead of them. 'I'm teaching Dummy and You to draw.'

'I just can't leave you alone, can I?' Rhodey shakes his head as they step off the lift.

'Nope,' Tony walks ahead to his workstation and Pete runs off to the bots.

'Tony, what happened?'

'Which part, honeybear?' he sighs and fiddles with a wrench he must have left on his desk.

'Let's start with nearly shooting Captain America,' Rhodey suggests.

'I had another panic attack,' Tony admits with a quick glance towards his son.

'You told me they'd stopped,' his friend scowls. 'Pepper and I were only ok with you moving back to New York because you said...'

'They did,' Tony interrupts and waves a hand dismissively. 'This had nothing to do with wormholes.'

'Alright...' Rhodey draws out the word leadingly. 'So what did he do?'

'Oh, come on,' Tony rolls his eyes, 'you look like you're gearing up to beat on him.'

'Do I need to?' he challenges. 'I have the suit.'

'No! It wasn't his fault; he told Pete not to open the cabinet under the bar and I freaked out,' Tony snaps. 'Can we drop it now?'

'And then you nearly shot him?' Rhodey presses.

'Jarvis activated the ceiling turrets,' Tony gives in. 'Kept them aimed at Steve until I told him to stand down.'

'You have ceiling turrets?'

'Don't you?'

He receives a look for that, but it's no where near as impressive as Pepper's.

'Are you two ok?' Rhodey asks after a few moments of silence.

'Me and Pete?' Tony realises how often he's glancing at his son. 'We're fine.'

'You and the Captain,' he corrects.

'Oh,' Tony blinks. 'Well, he hugged me and I nearly licked his neck.'

This results in another period of silence.

'You want to sleep with him,' Rhodey looks like he's contemplating walking out and coming back later.

'Have you seen him?' Tony scoffs. 'Can you imagine having that under you?'

Rhodey may be having some sort of seizure.

'I'm not going to!' Tony reassures him. 'That's why I had to get him to leave when I did.'

'So that you wouldn't climb him like a tree and blow his forties mind?'

'So I didn't encourage him,' Tony laughs. 'The idiot has a crush on me.'

'Captain America has a crush on you,' Rhodey groans, 'did you wish really hard?'

'I'm not going to sleep with him,' Tony tells him again. 'I know all the reasons it would be a terrible idea.'

'Right,' he doesn't look convinced. 'You do need to tell him about Jim.'

'You too?' Tony sits down and spins in his chair. 'I don't understand why you all think it's such a big deal.'

'Just tell him, Tony.'

'I was about to,' Tony admits. 'He acted a little hurt when I said you should be the favourite uncle and that he was Cap. I was going to tell him why I wasn't going to teach my kids to call him 'uncle' but then I had the...' he waves his hand. 'So I didn't.'

'Christ, Tony...'

'Yeah...' Tony tries to smile up at him. 'Timing, right?'

'Of all the guys you could trust with your kids...' Rhodey starts.

'I know,' he cuts him off. 'I know I can trust him; he's... Steve...'

'So what's the real problem, Tony? You know he's too good to ever reject the kid and he's too stubborn to get himself trapped doing something he doesn't want to do. And, bluntly, if you thought he was doing either you could just up and move across the country. Again. Or out of the country altogether.'

Tony rubs his eyes and sighs.

He does owe Rhodey the full truth.

'You know there's a difference between knowing I can trust him and actually being able to do it,' Tony absently brings up a couple of holograms and then dismisses them. 'He's my kid, Rhodey; I can't let Steve take him.'

'You just told me the guy has a crush on you, that doesn't sound like someone whose first thought will be to take your son away from you,' Rhodey points out.

'I don't necessarily mean permanently,' Tony dismisses. 'I mean to do those father son bonding things that real people do.'

'You not being real,' Rhodey replies dryly.

He gives him a hopeless look,

'What do I tell Pete?'

'What?'

'When Steve wants to take Jim out for the day?'

Why does everyone have to think so slowly?

'Oh, sorry, Pete,' he hisses at his best friend, 'no you can't play with your brother today. He's off with his father; you're just stuck with me I'm afraid.'

'You aren't telling Steve about his son because you think Pete will be jealous of his brother?'

'If I just wait,' Tony hopes he'll understand, 'then he'll love both of them, right? And then, when I tell him, he won't be able to stop spending time with Pete too.'

'Tony...' Rhodey looks pained.

'Pete deserves more than just me,' Tony points out.

How can anyone think to argue with that?