At the time of writing this, all the smoke outdoors is making it difficult to leave the house, so I have more chances to write now! Did anybody particularly like that yoga chapter? It was so fun to write, so we're going to revisit the yoga studio :D
Of course I can't find my gym bag now that I need it. It's annoying because I left it right by my yoga mat for a reason: convenience. I'm supposed to be dropped off at Yuuri's, now that he's back from his trip, so we can make our Thursday yoga session, but I can't without that bag. "Where are you?" I mutter to myself, digging through my closet contents. Clothes get tossed here and there, the floor getting buried under jumpers and jeans and a stray sock or two; I know I'll have to clean up later, but I just need that bag! "Damn it, where did it go?" I shout into the void, kicking a coat to the side.
"What's going on in here?"
At the sound of that voice, I hide under a particularly large pile of clothes with a whine. "I'm making a mess." The shirt covering my eyes gets pulled aside, revealing Seung Gil's face.
"Hi."
I sigh, but can't fight a tired smile. "Hi." Maybe I should explain why I'm in the process of tearing apart my bedroom. "Have you seen my gym bag? It's turquoise canvas with an ugly duct tape patch on one corner and weird stitching in another."
"Sounds like it's ready for the garbage. Why not get a new bag?"
Not the point! Sitting up, I start gathering things in piles to sort later. "It still has stuff in it, and I need it for yoga today." He helps me to my feet. "And I've had it forever."
Seung Gil shrugs, squeezing my hands. "Yeah, but maybe it's time for a new one. I haven't seen it." Excellent: it's missing. If it isn't in this room, I don't know where it could be. I want to express this out loud, but the look in Seung Gil's eyes halts my words. "Um, so you're going to hang out after yoga, right?" He asks. I nod, curious where this is going. "Does it…do you have to go alone this time?" Wait, what's he getting at? I'm not sure if he doesn't want me to leave or doesn't want me to be alone with Yuuri or simply forgot about my plans. He starts to blink, somewhat pink in the face. "If you don't want me to go, that's fine. Like, if this is something just between you two, I understand. I thought it might be nice to spend time with him since he's back in town, or…never mind."
Before he can walk away, I grab his wrist. "Wait! You want to come with us?"
"I mean, he is your best friend and I'm going to see him around from time to time and everything. It's just the two of you, so it won't be so bad, right?"
I've gone to the studio with Yuuri pretty much every week since I've met Seung Gil, but he's never shown any interest in wanting to go, too. Now, he's made the decision on his own to get to know my best friend! I'm so excited by this notion, I could kiss him: so I do. The sudden action surprises him, if his wide eyed expression is anything to go by. "You're quite a find, Mr. Lee." Yuuri doesn't know Seung Gil wants to come with, but I'm sure he won't mind. "I'll text to make sure it's cool. You're sure you want to go?"
"Well, yoga and the juice bar, right?" He asks. I nod, thrilled that he's considering a social activity without having me suggest it. "I think I can handle that."
With a cheer, I pull him in for a tight hug. "I'm so glad! Do you have anything to wear?"
Really, his look should say it all, but I wait for a response. "Um…I don't know?"
Going with the assumption that he's never been to a yoga session before. We're about the same size, so I'm sure I can find something that'll do around here somewhere. "No worries!" I reassure him in a made up melody. Suddenly, I'm glad there are so many pieces of clothing lying around. Sifting through it is short work: suitable shorts and a shirt are found in no time. My phone starts to ring while Seung Gil changes, but I don't see it. "Now where did my phone go?" I sigh.
"Nightstand."
Ah, that's right! Good thing Seung Gil noticed or I'd be looking around this mess in vain. "Thanks, babe." It's Yuuri calling, so I answer right away. "I'm almost ready! I was about to text you, actually."
"Is it about your bag? Because I have it right here."
Seriously? No wonder I couldn't find it! "Wait, I left it at your house? What the hell?" One of us is laughing, and it's not me. "Why is that funny? I was tearing apart my room looking for it." Honestly, he could've saved me a lot of trouble if he'd sent a picture of the bag earlier, or something. Spilled milk I guess.
Yuuri clears his throat to stop his giggling. "Sorry, I didn't know you forgot it was here. What were you going to say?"
"What?"
"You said you were going to text me?"
Oh, duh! "Right. Is it cool for Seung Gil to join us? He's in a sociable mood." I want to say more, like it's so cute that he wants to get to know Yuuri and spend time with us and it was a thousand percent his idea, but he's standing a few feet away from me, folding his clothes on the bed; I can always ramble on about my boyfriend later.
"Really? Yeah! I don't mind at all." I can hear the smile in Yuuri's voice. "Is he a beginner?"
"I think so, but that's no biggie. We'll be there soon, okay?"
Yuuri and I say our temporary farewells so I can give Seung Gil a rundown of what's to come. He doesn't ask me to, but I know it'll help him mentally prepare. He knows the way to Yuuri and Victor's house, no longer needing me to feed him directions while he drives. "Two hours of stretching?" He asks, like that's an eternity.
"It's more like an hour and a half, but with twenty or so minutes of resting."
"Okay."
"And then the bar is in the same building, so we'll all walk to there and relax for a bit. Another hour and a half sound alright?" He nods, but I want to warn him not to quote me on that; I'm trying to keep things short but we'll see. "We may end up talking longer than that, so if you're feeling like it's too much, just say you want to head back. Yuuri's gold, so he'll understand."
Seung Gil pulls into the driveway, tapping his fingers against the wheel. "He's not going to give me a hard time, is he?"
With an eye roll, I scoff. "Yeah right." I send Yuuri a text to let him know we're here.
"I'm just making sure."
"I know." I nudge his arm without force. "But he's not like that. Remember how nice he was after the party, sending a pizza to your apartment?" A couple days after Seung Gil and Yuuri met, the latter had food delivered to him to help cheer him up; I was all too happy to forward his address. "He knows what it's like meeting new people."
My boyfriend nods, exhaling to relax his shoulders. "Yeah, he is nice. Even after I ran from his hug."
I laugh, shaking my head. "That was smooth."
Yuuri jogs down the front steps, waving at us before hopping in the backseat. "Hey guys." He tosses my ugly bag at me without warning, ignoring my offended gasp when it hits me in the shoulder. "Here are your rags."
The two of them laugh, which I'm not sure how to feel about: on one hand, Seung Gil's getting along with Yuuri; on the other, it's at my expense. "It's a bag and you know it."
"I told him he needs a new one." Seung Gil mentions.
"See, Phichit?" Yuuri chuckles.
I find myself rolling my eyes again, even if my traitorous mouth curls in a smile. "I get it! Which one of you is buying it for me?"
"Done." Seung Gil nods.
He may not like sharing his food, but Seung Gil is surprisingly generous. Before I can thank him for the offer, Yuuri pinches my shoulder. "Settled." I can tell from his smile that he's just as appreciative of Seung Gil's generosity as I am; we always want what's best for each other, including significant others. "So how are you guys?"
Since Seung Gil is being such a sweetheart today, I tackle most of the talking. On the drive, only a couple comments and questions are directed at him, anyway, so it's an easy trip to the studio. As usual, Yuuri and I set up our yoga mats at the back of the room, keeping the end spot open for Seung Gil. He copies our movements, unrolling the mat I loaned him and setting his things in the bag he and Yuuri both evidently hate. "Sit like this." I show him the posture we normally start in, crossing my legs in lotus position. Really, it shouldn't surprise me how easily he figures it out; I know how flexible he is, but I assumed he'd need some guidance. "You're a fast learner."
He shrugs, settling in on my left. "I like to learn new things."
"Hopefully you'll learn plenty." Yuuri smiles on my right.
Once the session starts, my conversation with Yuuri doesn't end. "Minami talk to you about a new club he heard about?" I whisper to Yuuri. He regulates his breathing before answering.
"Yeah. How'd you know?"
Um, because anything Minami tells anyone has already been told to Yuuri? This is generally accepted as fact, as far as I know. "He always talks to you first about everything, even if it's about the weather." I remind him.
"That's not true."
I ignore his smile in favor of scoffing at him. "You know very well it's the truth. You're his idol."
"I am not. We're coworkers and friends, and he likes my show." With a shrug, he moves on to the question at hand. "I might drag Victor with me. You going?"
"Probably, but I want to talk Minami into going later on a Saturday."
As we shift postures, Yuuri turns to me. "How late are we talking?"
Normally I'd have no problem spending all evening with friends until the sun comes up, but a boyfriend changes that. I'm willing to go out with the others, but I'd like to spend time with Seung Gil on one of our shared days off, too, and not force him into prolonged discomfort. "Maybe, like, after dinner. I don't get many hours with Seung Gil, so I don't want to be out all night; just late night."
"Makes sense."
"Do you think Mila will bring her girlfriend?"
Yuuri chuckles under his breath. "She brings her everywhere. I've never seen her so crazy over someone before."
"I mean, who'd be crazy over her last ex? That guy was obnoxious."
"Everyone has their own tastes."
Oh, come on; the guy literally had no chill. While we relax into a new pose, I do my best to give Yuuri a look. "Having a guy who brags about his new car of the month every five minutes is not a taste anyone has." End of story.
"Okay, maybe that last one was bad."
"Understatement."
Yuuri smiles, honest and hopeful through his eyes. "Now she's always happy." This is true: Mila is a pro at hiding her feelings behind snarky smiles and diverted teasing, but we all knew she was feeling pretty low for a while. She went out with some people who were no match for her on any level, really; they weren't as clever, never as driven or loyal. Since dating Sara, I think she's come to realize that she deserves someone who supports her and loves the same things she loves. Smiles look good on everyone, and that's my professional opinion. "What about you?"
"What about me?" I whisper.
Our shifting movements pause the conversation for a moment. I catch a glimpse over my shoulder, finding Seung Gil keeping up with us just fine. "That."
What's Yuuri talking about? "What?"
"Your smile." He forces a laugh away, still grinning. "Has the sky seemed bluer to you lately?"
"Yuuri, do not."
"Have you experienced a loss of appetite?" I don't even acknowledge this, rolling my eyes at his questioning. "Or feelings of loss when you're alone? Or check your phone for messages, or cute pictures?" There's no chance to tell him to stop. "Have you felt at a loss for words, or wanted to try new things or change your address or last name?"
To hell with our yoga: I shove Yuuri, making him laugh and waver in his balance. He has some shame, though, blushing over an apology to the glaring group for being loud. "Behave!" I scold.
"Remember when you asked me those questions?" He finally stops laughing, red in the face.
"I did not ask you if you wanted to change your last name." I smirk.
Yuuri nods a concession at this point. "Okay, yeah, but I didn't know what I was feeling until you counseled me that way." Back in the day, I was testing out some love theories on Yuuri when he was clearly falling for Victor; I didn't think he'd use them on me one day. "And I'm happy for you, Phichit. You deserve that."
I could hug him, but that would cause a disruption; a knowing smile is enough to get my gratitude across, I think. "Hey." Seung Gil whispers, too far to hear the conversation centered around him.
"Yeah?"
"Are we allowed to talk?"
That depends on who's being asked, to be honest. I shrug. "Not really?"
"Oh, never mind, then. I'll ask you later."
He doesn't seem to notice that an entire discussion has gone on regardless of the no-talking rule. I'm curious what he has to say now, regretting not asking what's up. I mean, if it's important, he'll remember and tell me later. Since I told him no talking, I remain silent with Yuuri, too. Try as I might, most of my thoughts turn to Seung Gil anyway, reinforcing Yuuri's earlier point of me being thoroughly struck by cupid's arrow. I don't want to be thera-Phichit right now, delving into how valid my feelings are and if I'm misinterpreting attachment or attraction for something else, so I focus on my breathing for the remainder of our stretching. I periodically glance at Seung Gil, certain that no matter how I classify my emotions, there's no denying that I like being with the man more than I've liked being with anybody. I don't need a doctorate to know that.
Śavāsana ends all too soon, quiet chatter around me jostling consciousness back. The conversation is about playing piano, and how it's like riding a bike. When I rub my eyes and sit up, the voices become much clearer: Yuuri and Seung Gil, rolling up their mats and packing up to go. Seeing them smiling, relaxed in each other's company gives me a warm feeling inside; I hoped they'd get along! A part of me wonders if they're even going to wait for me before leaving. "Hey, you two." I yawn, wiggling my fingers Seung Gil's way.
He pulls me up, careful not to step on my mat now that his shoes are on. "Sleepyhead."
"Seung Gil was just telling me he used to play piano as a kid." Yuuri informs me. "It's impossible to forget once you have the basics."
I sigh and pack up my things, slow and lazy. "Only if you're musically inclined. And I'm not."
"But you're a good singer." Seung Gil protests.
Yuuri nods. "Yeah, that's true." He takes it upon himself to roll up my mat and expedite the process. "You just don't play any instruments."
"I tried to play violin once, and it scared the neighbors."
Why did I share that? I guess if it makes the others laugh on our way to the bar, it's all good. "What does one order at a place like this?" Seung Gil whispers so only I can hear. I've been at several juice bars, but it doesn't surprise me that he's new to this; he cringes at the produce aisle when we grocery shop, after all.
Yuuri is already at the counter, deciding what to order. I pull Seung Gil closer to the counter to point at the menu. "Either a juice, smoothie or something in a bottle." I direct his attention to the juice selection. "I'm getting one with apple, cucumber, lemon, beet and ginger." If I didn't know any better, I'd think I told him I was about to drink mud. That repulsed look is priceless, making me laugh and squeeze his shoulder. "Wow, your face!" Composing myself is no easy feat, but I do my best and review the menu. "Do you trust me?"
"I do."
I smile, delighting in the ease of his response. "I'll order for you. If you want, you can wait over there with Yuuri or wait with me."
Seung Gil's eyes pass between my best friend and me, weighing his options in silence. There's no line at the register, so I don't mind waiting at all. After some thought, he nods Yuuri's direction. "I'll go with Yuuri, that way you can surprise me." The cute little smile that precedes a quick kiss to my cheek rattles my heart against my ribcage, butterflies filling my belly. There's no chance to respond, so I'm left standing here with my jaw fallen open like a fish out of water. Seung Gil is far too adorable to be real, I swear.
"Want to find a place to sit?" Yuuri asks him, a bottle in each hand.
In response, Seung Gil nods, taking offense to the unopened bottle. "What is that and why is it black?"
"Oh, charcoal. For Victor's immune system."
"Seriously gross."
After I order for us, I tote the cups to the small table they picked, placed around the corner where they can't see me watching them. It's hard to believe what I'm seeing, honestly. Yuuri rarely thinks my boyfriends are good enough for me, but can usually appreciate them for who they are anyway; the way his smile reaches his eyes and his laugh comes out so easily around Seung Gil is a blessing. Seung Gil isn't particularly fond of humans and claims he sucks at carrying on conversations, but he's sitting right over there with someone he only met in person once before, smiling a little and talking back and forth without any hesitation in his gaze. His face is turning slightly pink, but…so is Yuuri's. What could they be talking about? Curiosity quickly wins over politeness as I duck behind the wall nearest to them without a sound. "He knows himself, but sometimes those little voices get through anyway. It's usually no big deal." Yuuri informs him.
"So, is physical reassurance better than verbal?" Seung Gil leans forward. "I want to get it right."
Yuuri sips from his bottle of juice, green with spinach, chia seeds and spirulina, before giving an answer. "I think it depends on what the insecurity is. If it's about how he looks, then hugs and kisses will be better. If it's something else, start with words and then add physical stuff to really make him feel better."
"I guess it's a good thing I like cuddling with him."
I'm pretty sure this isn't a joke, but Yuuri laughs anyway with a nod. "Yeah, it's a really good thing." A natural lull in the conversation leaves me a great opportunity to walk over, a drink in each hand. Yuuri waves, smiling like he wasn't just talking about me. "Hi, P."
I sit beside Seung Gil, sliding his smoothie over. "What were you laughing about?" My question is directed at Yuuri, smirking shamelessly.
"How much Seung Gil is already spoiling you."
"Yuuri!" I sigh, rolling my eyes. Seung Gil chuckles, looking his drink over. "I can't help if my own boyfriend likes treating me well."
"I'm kidding." Yuuri insists. "I was telling him the best ways to take care of you, since he asked."
And just like that, I'm a puddle of blushing adoration drained of cattiness and curiosity. How else should I react to my best friend looking out for me and my boyfriend getting tips for how to be good to me? I thought they were gossiping, but this is a million times better. My vocabulary is suddenly reduced to one word: "Babe." I thread my fingers through Seung Gil's and just stare at him, feeling lucky and, yes, loved. With his other hand, he points at his cup.
"What's in this?"
"Chocolate, banana, peanut butter."
His smile grows, squeezing my hand twice. "I knew I could trust you."
Not long after some talk about movies, cooking and the station, Yuuri gets a call from his husband that he'll be home earlier than planned and he basically rushes us out and to the car. I happen to know that Victor has been particularly busy this week and Yuuri is dying to spend some time with him; the excitement that lit up his face when the call came in would be a giveaway even to the untrained eye. Seung Gil stays in the driveway after we drop Yuuri off, checking his phone for something. When he doesn't say anything, I lower the radio volume. "Are you busy?" I'm not trying to get him off the phone, but I do want to know why we're just sitting in someone else's parking space.
He looks up, pointing at the screen. "Checking the weather."
Alright then. "Oh, I'm sure it's great news." I sigh. "Cold with a chance of frostbite."
"I want to know when the temperature will go back up."
"Oh yeah?"
Seung Gil nods, finally setting his phone aside. "Yeah, so maybe we can go out for a walk downtown, or go to the park without worrying about you freezing to death." He pauses in his attempt at backing out onto the street, turning to look at me with such urgency I feel like I've missed something. "Do you have a bike?"
Why does he look so concerned? "Um, yeah, in storage at my place?"
His shoulders fall with a sigh and he resumes driving away from Yuuri's place. "Okay, good. That'll be something we can do if spring ever shows up."
Why that was such a cause for concern is beyond me. I don't ask, either; I sit back and laugh softly. "Oh, Mr. Lee. It's too bad we hadn't met sooner." In place of a response, Seung Gil grabs my hand and doesn't let go. "By the way, babe. You started telling me something during yoga, but never got to the actual question. What were you going to ask?"
"Shit, you're right. Do we have a waffle iron?"
We: used to refer to oneself and one or more other people together. I shouldn't feel such giddiness from a two letter word everyone says every day, especially in a context where the main topic is waffles. Analyzing it would be silly, I know, so I'll write it off as Seung Gil simply being comfortable with our relationship and treat myself to a grin anyway. "Yes, it's in the cupboard by the blender. Why?"
"Okay, 'cause I saw this recipe for bacon and cheese hashbrowns, or something, that you make in a waffle iron and it looked like something we could try." He shrugs, suppressing a smile. "Not the healthiest thing, I know, but I'm hungry and I want that. Are you interested?"
"Only if we already have all the ingredients." I listen to him list off what we need, surprised that we actually do have it all. "Yeah, we're good!"
"Super. Do you mind if I nap first?" He asks when he finds a parking space he likes. I've seen his apartment and I've stopped by a handful of times, but we never stay there. At first I thought it was because he was embarrassed by it, but it's nicer than mine and I've gotten so used to having him over that I guess I forgot to mention it. "That got me sleepy."
I remember to respond when we're trekking up the stairs, shaking my head. "No, go ahead."
"Yuuri's a nice person, but I think I still need to recuperate a bit."
Understandable; getting out of a comfort zone can be draining. I'm glad he knows himself enough to know what he needs to stay healthy. "That makes sense." The warmth of my apartment is welcoming, pulling me to its familiarity and reminding me of the question I've never asked. "Can I ask you something?"
We pile our coats and shoes near the door, now having unspoken designated spots for our things. Seung Gil yawns, reaching his hands up to stretch before grabbing my hands at my sides. "You can."
"Why don't we ever stay at your place?" I'm only curious, but it kind of sounds insecure? I'm probably overthinking this, damn it. "I'm not saying we need to, and I don't think you're embarrassed or uncomfortable taking me there or anything like that, but…" I think I've just made myself sound exactly how I didn't want to. Why am I dragging this out? Get to the point. "I'm just curious why we only stay here."
Seung Gil's expression hasn't changed a bit: still smiling enough for his dimple to show, hands in mine, eyes focused but not hard. "I prefer it."
Simple as that? "You do?" I ask and he replies with a nod. "Why?"
"My place is cold and quiet. I never cook there, so it smells like a new apartment and books. It's not warm like it is here, and doesn't smell like your cinnamon coffee or that lotion you use after you shower." He shrugs, taking a step closer. "It feels more like a home here than it does over there. Plus, you're here and that's definitely a top selling point."
I smile, glad to know my place is a safe space for him; it feels good to be a comfort to somebody. "I didn't know you felt that way."
"Yeah, well, I do." Seung Gil kisses me, soft and verging on sleepy. "I'm good if I'm with you."
If there's a higher compliment, I have yet to hear it! My smile is relentless and all I want to do is hold this incredible individual until my arms give out. I settle for a hug instead, sure my feelings will come through. "You are such a treasure." I only pull back to sneak in a quick kiss. "I'm glad you came with us to yoga. It was fun."
"It was, but now I'm tired." He tugs my hands, leading the way down the hall. "Come to bed with me, my beautiful."
Curled up in his arms, pressed to his chest under a mountain of blankets is exactly where I want to be. Even though I'm not all that tired, resting in bed with Seung Gil is relaxing and sets every part of me at ease. Sometimes I can't believe my luck, but then again, everyone deserves happiness; mine came in the form of a quiet, kind and brilliant man who doesn't make me feel less-than or needy. He makes me feel wanted and appreciated, which I could surely get used to.
Achieving personal goals is such a mood booster; personal growth is liberating, and I wanted to emphasize that in this fic. Bloom like flowers, yo~
