Chapter 3 – Conflicts
My head was spinning. I felt my heart beating, but my arms and legs weren't moving. I must was dreaming. Soon, I would wake up in my bedroom. There was a dim light behind my eyelids. I groaned, the light was dim, but it was still too bright for my eyes. I was just waking up. I must have fallen asleep with my lamp on. I turned to my side and I picked up the smell of paint. Something clumped down on my pillow. "Bella, are you ok?" I picked my head up too quickly, that was a mistake. I laid back down, holding my head, "Where am I? What's going on?" "The nurse's office. You fainted." I looked to my left and saw Angela and Jessica sitting by me. "No, no, I was dreaming. That was not real." Jessica sighed, "Yes it was. You saw…" I shook my head and she stopped mid-sentence. I sat up slowly, "Ok, let's recap. I arrived at school a few minutes before class, right?" Angela nodded, "Yes." "Then the three of us walked to class and we were talking." "Right," Angela confirmed for me. I sighed, "Then I saw Alice." Jessica nodded, "Yea." I closed my eyes, "Then… what happened?" Angela sighed, "You saw Edward." I closed my eyes and fell back on the pillow. "And I fainted in front of him?"
"Bella, don't beat yourself up. It was overwhelming. Your best friend and your… ex-boyfriend suddenly showing up. That's a lot to deal with. I mean you missed a whole week of school when they left." I sighed, "I mean, did he say anything else?" Angela shook her head, "No, he just carried you here. He did insist on staying with you, but Ms. Cope wasn't going for it. She knew it was their first day back. You've been out for the first four hours. He and Alice have been here between each class to check on you. Next hour is lunch, if you want to wait?" I nodded, "That sounds like a great idea." Ms. Cope came in and checked on me, "Are you all right, dear? Do you want me to call your father?" "No! No, that really isn't necessary. Could I just spend the rest of the hour here? I'm still feeling a little…." "Of course, dear. Girls, you can go to class." I bit my lip, "Actually, can they stay? I really don't want to be alone." Ms. Cope nodded, "Of course. I'll bring you some water."
Once the door closed, Jessica, Angela and I huddled together. "After first hour, Edward practically ripped the door off, asking if you had woken up. He looked like he wanted to be alone with you, but we didn't leave you. After second hour, he was begging Ms. Cope if he could stay, but she wasn't letting him skip class." Jessica told me what Ms. Cope said, "Edward, I know you're worried about her, but you cannot miss class on your first day. As soon as she is awake, I will call your teacher to let you know, but you are not missing class." Jessica looked over her shoulder, "I think Ms. Cope just called his class." My eyes widened, "He must be worried about me for Alice's sake." Jessica and Angela looked at each other, "I don't think so," they said in unison.
Soon the bell rang. I had to escape soon, before either Alice or Edward arrived. "Let's go." Outside, everyone's eyes were on my face as they passed. "I'm going to assume…." "Yes, everyone knows," Jessica confirmed. I groaned, "Ok, so what did you guys mean by 'you didn't think so?' You think he had another reason?" Jessica smiled, "I think he still cares about you. I mean I saw the look on his face every time Ms. Cope told him he had to go. Or when he came in the room to check on you." We walked into the cafeteria and got our lunches. Going to our table, I saw two more people there, "Oh boy." Angela followed my gaze, "It's just lunch, Bella." I sighed, "You're right." I really was making a big deal out of nothing. More than likely, the Cullens wanted to come back to Forks and just convinced him to deal with it. This was their favorite place to live. And, he only carried me to the nurse's office because he was the only guy with us and it would be a complete shock watching Alice carry me. I walked to the table, sitting next to Angela. There was a seat empty next to me and I didn't look up as someone sat down. I closed my eyes and drank my soda. "Bella." I looked up at him, "Yes?" All eyes from around the table were on us. I looked around and all eyes went in various directions. I sighed again. "Bella, how are you felling?" "Fine, thank you for helping me. Jess and Angela told me." His hand raised but he drew it back, "If you want, you don't have to spend the rest of the day here. I could take you home." I sighed, "Like the last time." He smiled, "Yes."
I looked up around the table and I saw the others looking in different directions, but I knew they were listening. "Bella," Edward tried to get my attention again, "I need to talk to you. It's rather important." I looked up at him and he was staring into my eyes. "A.. all right." "Could we go for a walk?" That sent a shiver down my spine. I nodded and we got up. Edward held the door for me as we walked outside the cafeteria. It was misting outside, but I still shivered. The cold I was feeling was from the anticipation of what Edward was about to tell me. Edward walked closely to me. We were now underneath the awning of Building 3. I tried not to look into his eye. That would be far too painful. "Bella." I let my eyes drift upward, but I did not look into his eyes, "Yes?" He sighed, "How are you?" "Fine." "How do you feel, really?" I sighed, "I'm all right. Umm, you really didn't have to do that." To my surprise, he chuckled, "I wanted to. At least Mike wasn't in the way this time." I actually half-smiled at the statement. "What did you want to talk to me about?" I was being a masochist. I wanted this over as soon as possible. The sooner it was over, the sooner the pain would consume me and I would slip back into my depression. I was preparing myself for that.
I blinked slowly, but as my eyes opened, I saw Edward's hand reaching up for my face. My cheeks burned as his cool fingers touched my face. My heart betrayed me, as it sprinted into its race, as it always did whenever Edward touched me. He stepped closer to me, still holding my face. His hand cupped my face as he said my name, "Bella, I am so sorry. I am sorry for what I did to you. For what it did to you when I left." I blinked and looked up into his eyes. Edward's eyes were looking straight into mine, "What?" The word escaped my lips before I knew it. He stared at me, "I never should have left you. I was wrong and I am so sorry." I shook my head, "But you said……" His thumb brushed over my lips, "Bella, what I said that day," my cheeks flushed at the memory, "it wasn't true. None of it was. Why did you believe me so easily? How could you believe any of the things I told you?"
My breathing became gasps and a traitor tear fell from my eye. "Bella," he spoke my name with concern. My eyes fell from his face and I felt my legs weaken. "You… you..." "Bella!" Another voice called me from the parking lot. Edward's hand fell from my face as we both turned and saw who called me. My eyes widened as we saw Jacob getting out of his car. Edward shifted his body, so that he was half-blocking me from Jacob as he approached us. My body reacted to Jacob and Edward's close proximity; my pulsed raced and my body tightened. They were natural enemies. Jacob stopped about six feet away, his nose wrinkling in disgust, "What are you doing here?" I opened my mouth to speak, but Edward answered, "My family has decided to return to Forks." I looked at Jacob and saw his hands were trembling. "If that is all you came for, would you excuse us. Bella and I were talking." Jacob's eyes widened and he spoke through his teeth, "I need to speak to her." Anger was clear in Edward's response, "Well, it will have to wait." Jacob's spasms moved up his arms. I stepped around Edward, but he held my wrist, "No, Bella, don't." "It's fine," I pleaded. "No," he looked down at me, "you don't know…." "Yes, I do." Edward's hold loosened and I went over to Jacob, "Jake, calm down." I felt Edward's eyes on me. "Be…" Jacob stuttered my name. I put my hand on his chest, "Jake, this isn't the place." His trembling slowed, he exhaled and looked at me. Jacob's arm wound around my waist, "Let's go." Jacob began to tow me away, but Edward flashed in front of us, "Get your hand off her, mutt!" The look in Edward's eyes scared me. He looked like a monster. Jacob's hand on my waist tightened into a fist, as he held me closer to his side, "Do not talk to me like that, bloodsucker. Get out of our way!" Edward's eyes narrowed and Jacob began to tremble again.
"Stop!" I stood between them, looking back and forth between their faces. "Bella," I looked at Edward. I wanted to calm them both down, but it was pointless. "Bella," I looked at Jacob. I sighed, "I have to go." Lunch hour was almost over and I wanted to escape. "I'll take you to class," Edward offered. I shook my head, "No, I'm going home." "I'll take you," Jacob offered. "No! I want to be alone. I….." I shook my head again and walked away from both of them. I walked away from Edward and Jacob, feeling their eyes on my back. The misting rain dampened my hair, but I didn't bother to put on my hood. I didn't care if this got back to Charlie. Knowing that the Cullens were back, Charlie wouldn't be that mad at me for leaving school early. My drive was completely absentminded. I don't even know how I got home. I walked into the house and made my way to my room.
I got undressed and put on my old sweats. I just laid in bed and let the day's events run through my mind. The Cullens were back. Edward was back. He had lied to me the day he left. Another tear fell from my eye. I closed my eyes, as my chest began to heave from my sobs. This was surreal. How I wanted Edward to come back, but now, I was unsure. I had to admit to myself that I was beginning the process of getting over Edward. My nightmare was fading, I was no longer looking for my hallucinations and the hole in my chest was hurting less. I knew I would always love Edward, but I was coping with the fact that he was gone and he didn't want me. How can I cope with this?
