A week passed, then two, and frustratingly I wasn't making the progress I wanted to make. What the adults were trying to teach me was much harder than it sounded. One day, when I was particularly frustrated, Shikaku explained that it was difficult in part because I hadn't even fully grasped the basics yet.
"You're too hard on yourself, kid. It's only been two weeks - and you've already got a functioning grasp on the basics. I figured you would. It's not perfect, but some children - it takes them a year or more. Now that you've kind of figured out the absolute basics, we can't wait for you to completely master them. It's like you're a one-year-old, and we're trying to teach you how to swim just after you've had a crash course in crawling. Because, if you don't learn to swim, you're just going to straight up drown, and you'll never get the opportunity to walk." The older ninja explained as he watched the clouds shift slowly across the blue sky.
"So, yes, the solution is difficult, but without this, you'll never be allowed to graduate from the academy. You would be too much of a liability on a team. On the bright side, if you can master this, you'll have something that will make everything else you must learn in the academy and even beyond that look easy. Some ninja never fully master this."
The 'this' he was speaking about was chakra control. That was what I really had to learn, and not just the simple kind that would help me cling to trees or walk across water. What they were teaching me was on a whole other level. The shielding they had been talking about was basically building a very thin layer of my own chakra around my mind and eyes, and, if I was going to do that, I had to master chakra control first. If the chakra I used was too thin, it would be ineffective. If it was too thick, it would literally put pressure on my brain causing me to essentially faint after prolonged exposure. It was a spin on a technique Tsume used to shield against strong scents. However, coating your nasal cavity with too much chakra was only liable to give you a bad case of sinus pressure, maybe a nosebleed if you were really rough on yourself. In my case, I could probably cause brain damage or kill myself if I wasn't careful. Thus, it was crucial that I nailed chakra control training.
Once I had mastered controlling my chakra with the necessary skill, then I'd be taught how to create a basic shield that would allow me to just shut off my ability on command. Shikaku's long-term plan was for me to eventually refine this shielding technique so that I could selectively manipulate which sensations came in and which ones I blocked. I had a long ways to go to get there. Maybe years.
The biggest thing that was slowing down my training was that practicing controlling my chakra burned through a massive amount of chakra energy. I had become the poster child for what chakra exhaustion does to a person. Bluntly put, I was sleeping a whole heck of a lot.
I always got the furthest when training with Itachi. It wasn't because he was more skilled at teaching or explaining than Shikaku or Tsume. Instead, it was because, when my double vision started to act up, he'd just drag me into a genjutsu then drop me back out, and we would continue as if nothing at all were amiss. I suppose most people would be kind of peeved at getting dumped in and out of a series of genjutsus, but, for me, it was kind of soothing. I never even had to say anything. Itachi just always seemed to know when the pain from my headache was on the brink of being too much.
On the whole, most of what Tsume, Shikaku, and Itachi did during training was protect me from self-inflicted damage. I was strictly not supposed to practice unless one of them was close at hand. So, at the moment, I was sitting on Shikaku's porch trying to create evenly pressurized chakra between my hands. Easier said than done since I was struggling to even get the stuff out of my body and playing across my palms in a semi-consistent way.
Suddenly, I tipped over with a thunk as the chakra pressure in my right hand peaked unexpectedly and literally pushed me over. "Ow," I hissed as I pushed myself back up, rubbing at the palm of my left hand which was a bright red from taking the blast of chakra.
"You couldn't even do that at the start of the week. See? You're getting your chakra to come to your hands almost every time now. Keep working on pulling less energy. You don't need a lot - just an even, steady amount emanating from both palms. Once it's a bit more consistent, we'll have you move to Operation Nutcracker."
"Operation Nutcracker?"
"Yup!" Shikaku smirked. "Yoshino's bought a twenty-pound bag of nuts. Once you've gotten close to having even pressure, then I want you to try holding the nut in your hand - without cracking the nutshell. Then we'll move on to eggs and finally mochi. Once you get to the point of not squishing mochi balls with chakra, then I think you'll be close."
I sighed and slumped forward, resting my elbows on my knees as I cupped my chin in my hands. "Geh. This is gonna take a while, and I'm slightly disturbed that my brain is being compared to a mochi…"
"Pfft." The elder Nara snickered and rubbed a hand over his mouth as he glanced away, "Well, you're making fine progress, Nora."
"Mm, yeah. I just feel so tired all the time now…" It was the reason I was sitting with Shikaku on his back porch, fitfully trying to practice, and not playing with Chouji, Kiba, and Shikamaru this afternoon. They had all left for the playground hours ago, but I had been too exhausted to go with them.
Shikaku patted my head gently, "That's because of how much chakra you're using every day and because you're pushing yourself too hard just like you do in everything. You'll get used to it, and, soon, you'll also learn how to not overuse your chakra. One day, you'll no longer even miss the chakra you use to practice."
"I hope it's soon." I mumbled and then let out a huge yawn, "I want to do stuff besides eating, sleeping, and training."
Shikaku snickered softly. "Come on, kid. I know it goes against your nature as an Inuzuka, but go ahead and rest a little. Forcing yourself to stay awake does nothing."
"Mmmkay," I grumbled, letting the pressure of Shikaku's hand on my head tip me over onto his lap. Sleep came to me so quickly, it was almost like I had blacked out.
"Do you think it would be okay if she didn't train this coming Friday and Saturday? We've been pushing her hard." From within the haze of sleep, Itachi's voice seemed to intrude into my dreams.
"It's not entirely our fault, Itachi. Today was supposed to be a day off, but she insisted." Shikaku's calm voice answered, followed by a soft snicker. "Still, I think a break should be in order. Though I know she's hot to master this, if we don't slow her down, she may go into full-blown chakra exhaustion."
Tsume's voice followed his and added with a sniff, "Agreed."
"I have an offer then." Itachi's voice started off slowly. "Sasuke seems to like her, and I'd like Nora to come to my brother's birthday party this Saturday. I don't mind if we use it as an excuse to help curb her furor for a couple days."
"Well, as long as you're present, Itachi-kun, I don't see why not. Your father seems a bit put off by your time with my daughter. He made sure to imply as much when we met by chance outside the Hokage's office yesterday."
"No, it's not you, Tsume-san. My father, he is, well, he is being pushed by many voices in the clan. I'm not at liberty to say much more than that. However, I am free to make my own decisions apart from him, and I will do what I think is right."
"What did the head of the Uchiha Clan say to you, Tsume?"
"Something about how I was wasting his precious heir's time and about imposing on his son's kind nature to train a child of, uh, what did he say… Oh yeah! Dubious provenience. Child of dubious provenience, whatever the hell that means."
"That's a very polite way of calling her an orphan of unknown background, Tsume." Shikaku calmly replied.
"What?! That dirty, rotten son of a…" Clearing her throat, she coughed, "Sorry, kid, I don't mean it that way about your dad but…"
"No, no offense taken, Tsume-san. I'm sure it looks that way to him. I have purposefully left him ignorant of Nora's true value in deference to the Hokage's desire to keep the situation quiet. Outside of mitigating circumstances, this arrangement certainly would seem like a waste of my time."
"Still, a birthday party, huh?" Tsume chuckled faintly.
"I'm hoping that it will help my brother make friends. Sometimes, I feel my clan has become… insular. We tend to make friends and forge relationships strictly within the clan, and I want my brother to see something different than what the clan alone can offer. I used to think more like my father, but now, after seeing what other ninjas of Konoha are willing to sacrifice, I'm convinced that we are like a body that works best when all the pieces work together. To put it simply, if the Uchiha are the eyes, then the Inuzuka are the nose, and the Nara the brain… perhaps the Akimichi are the stomach." With a hint of laughter, the older boy added, "The example breaks down a bit beyond that, but the point is that together we are one entity. Konoha. The Will of Fire. And I think it a terrible thing to believe one does not need the other parts of the body to be strong."
"Well said, Itachi, well said." Shikaku chuckled then, and my resting spot shifted, "What time on Saturday?"
"Noon. And, if you don't mind me asking, do you know how I might get in touch with some more children in this age group?"
Tsume laughed loudly, "Let me and Yoshino handle that for you, kid. We'll get the word out to our friends who have children around the same age. I've got all those good mommy connections, and I don't mind using them. Think of it as repaying a minuscule amount of what I owe you for helping my little stray pup."
Suddenly, I was scooped up from my warm nest and draped over a shoulder. Wearily, I blinked a couple of times and reached out to wrap my arms around the neck of the person who had picked me up. I knew it was Tsume just by the musky scent of her hair. "Oy, kid, you still asleep?"
"Yes," I muttered into her neck, which earned me a trio of chuckles.
"Better take her home. She's been out like a light for the past two hours. The rest of the pack is at the park. Tell Shikamaru to get his butt back here for dinner."
Had it seriously been two hours? Tsume shifted me so that my weight rested on one of her arms as she turned to head out of the Nara compound, "No problem. I'll see you two later." Weariness stole over me, and my eyes slowly slipped closed before we were even out on the street.
"You get anything else out of my Dad?" Shikamaru asked right in my ear, making me jerk with surprise just before I glared over my shoulder at the grinning boy who snickered softly.
"Geez, at least give me some warning." I was having a semi-normal day today. Not because I wanted one, but because, yes, the threat of missing a birthday party due to chakra exhaustion was enough to get me to be a normal kid and just hang out at the playground with everyone else. I had priorities. Cake was among them.
"You normally would have noticed by now." Shikamaru leaned forward and peered at what I was building in the sandbox. "You're just not paying attention."
It was a statement which was synonymous with him saying that he knew I was tired. Granted, he was right. Even though I wasn't totally exhausted today, I was the only one hanging out at the sandbox, quietly building something instead of participating in our group's normal hijinks.
"I mean - look at what you're building. What even is that?"
Puffing out my cheeks at him for a moment, I clicked my tongue and muttered, "Yeah, you're right. Not sure. Let's call it a sand blob. I haven't gotten anything else out of your dad. His guard's up now. Same for my mom. They're actually paying attention to what they say in front of me for once."
Shikamaru and I had founded a mutual spy agreement after that one evening two weeks ago. The younger Nara had overheard just about everything. I apparently woke him when I got up, and the little creeper just decided to join in on my lurking. I really needed to start paying better attention to my surroundings.
"Eh. It's their own fault that they let their guard down in the first place. I think they just assumed we would sleep through the whole conversation. Or that even if we did wake up we wouldn't be interested in a boring adult discussion - you know? They'll probably keep closer tabs on us now. I think the Hokage was amused though."
"Amused? What do you mean?" I peered up at Shikamaru, pausing my sand moving to stare at him.
"Heh. You've never met the old man before, huh? He does this smirk and his eyes twinkle whenever he's amused by something. He probably knew we were listening in the whole time - even if the rest were too focused on their conversation to notice us."
The dark-haired boy's eyes suddenly grew serious as he added, "You learn anything more about Orochimaru? No ones explained the experiment part to you yet, have they?"
I shrugged in response. "It all happened when I was a baby. I think he was the one who dumped me in the woods. I'm probably lucky I can't remember." I grimaced at my own explanation as I let myself consider the possibilities of what sort of things could have been done. I was glad, in a way, that my first real memory in this form was as an infant in the woods, and not before that.
Shikamaru's eyes narrowed into a dark glare and he wrinkled his nose before flicking my forehead lightly with his finger. "Don't think about it if you're going to make that expression. I don't like it."
"Ow." I griped, pressing the sandy palm of my hand to my forehead, but then I smiled faintly adding, "Okay, thanks, Shikamaru."
Just then a blur of blonde hair followed by another blur of brown hair pounded through the sandbox with no warning, throwing up sand in every direction. I didn't recognize the blonde, but the kid with brown hair behind him was my brother.
I shielded my eyes from the onslaught of sand, ducking down until the two boys left the sandbox. Lifting my head, I cringed as the two traded clumsy punches. Kiba shoved the blonde backward, and as the other kid fell he grabbed my brother. Then they both rolled down the embankment that made up the far perimeter of the playground.
Standing and shaking sand out of my shirt, I sighed as I looked over to see what had happened to the pair. There, at the bottom of the bank, the two were trading punches. "Geez. What the heck set him off this time?"
"Could be any number of things," Shikamaru muttered. "Friggin heck. I've even got sand in my underwear - now I'm going to itch until I get a bath tonight. Oy, Chouji - what's going on?"
"Eh." Chouji opened a fresh bag of chips as he walked over to join us. "It's that kid. You know - the troublemaker from the orphanage. Supposed to stay away from him, but Kiba got pissed at him acting weird and mopey on the swings and not taking turns." Sticking a handful of chips in his mouth, he crunched loudly as he continued to talk around the chips, "So, Kiba challenged him to a fight."
"Wasn't his name Naruto or something?" Shikamaru asked as he took a chip when Chouji offered first him and then me the bag in turn.
Taking a chip myself, I blinked at that name. Naruto? Now that sounded eerily familiar. Biting off a chunk of the chip, I chewed it slowly as I glanced back towards my brother's fight. Hadn't I written that word down in my journal recently? I'd have to look when I got back home.
"Think we should break it up?" I asked then stuck the rest of the chip in my mouth. Vinegar and salt flavor. Not bad.
"Nah. I don't want to get punched." Shikamaru crossed his arms across his chest.
"I'm kind of hungry," Chouji added, looking forlornly down at his suddenly empty bag of chips. "And I'm out of snacks…"
"Let's go get some ramen, then. I'm tired of this place, and I kind of hate sand now." Shikamaru stuffed his hands in his pockets and trudged forward a few steps before glancing back at us.
Chouji and I both turned and grinned at each other, then we jogged the few steps to catch up with the Nara. "Ichiraku's, right?"
"Obviously!" Chouji replied to my question. "Mmm… I can taste it already."
"Kiba's going to hate us later." I laughed, rolling back onto my heels for an instant.
"Yup. But maybe next time he won't pick a fight."
"Ahh, Shikamaru… you have such high hopes for my brother." I laughed again, knowing full well that missing a little food would do nothing to stop him from being a hothead. For him, it was genetic.
A/N: It took me longer than anticipated to get this chapter done. There was lots of editing for consistency and clarity since this is kind of a bridge chapter into the next section. Hopefully, I found all of my errors. This is now the longest chapter in the story so far!
