No own. Unless you count ownage.

Ch 3: Chunin Exams Part 1


After the encounter with the sand team, Naruto reluctantly followed the bastard to the exam site. He had said his goodbyes to the brat trio, after snatching back his kunai pouch. If that wasn't a travesty on its own, then it certainly was with their thought Sasuke-teme was cool.

As if the the emo emotionally stunted asshole with a stick up said crevice the size of the Hokage monument was cool. The only mysterious thing about him is how he managed to shove it up so that and his apparent ignorance of the way people worshipped him. Everyone treated him like he was a prince. Uchiha-sama this, Uchiha-dono that. Why couldn't he be the one treated like that? Naruto knew he'd appreciate it more.

Then again, those fangirls certainly weren't worth it… unless Sakura-chan was one.

Speaking of Sakura, the contrasting duo spotted her waiting in front of the academy. Her clothes were ruffled, a few tears were scattered across the fabric in an array of anarchy. Seams were loose and frayed, much like her now shorter and uneven hair.

"You look like crap Sakura-chan!" He yelled with a wide grin. For some reason she didn't smile back. In fact, she looked distinctly unhappy to see (in this case hear) him. Sakura was robbed of the chance to reply when Sasuke grunted an answer to his unspoken question.

"Are you an idiot?" The bastard had the gall to call him dull! Just when he thought he'd actually be helpful. The Uchiha tapped his chin in mock thought. "Oh right, you are."

"Teme, I'm not-"

"Shut-up Naruto, let's just go in the building," He was interrupted by a tired reprimand from the source of the argument. The blond was going to protest, but he saw how worn out she looked. He was the one who pointed it out, after all. Sasuke agreed in a monosyllabic fashion, like usual, and walked into the building. Naruto followed with a pout, but stayed quiet.

They walked through the halls of the academy, filling Naruto with a melancholic nostalgia. His memories of this place were bittersweet in their duel nature. This was the place he'd met his second precious person, Iruka-sensei. It was also the place he failed the exam thrice. Mizuki, Shikamaru and Choji. The teme, Sakura-chan. Betrayal, and bonds.

A commotion tore him from his musings. Two vaguely familiar faces we're sneering in derision at a girl with twin buns. What was her name… Ton-Ton? Tin-Tin? His question was once again answered without it needing to be voiced.

"Tenten-chan!" A boy, presumably her teammate, yelled in worry. He knelt to her side, checking for bruises. The attacker scoffed.

"If you can't even take a light hit like that, how are you supposed to survive these exams? It isn't for little girls playing at being ninja."

The recipient of said lecture, if it could even be called that, clenched her fists. Her jaw was tightly shut, as if she was barely holding back from strangling him. Naruto was going to help, but Sasuke grabbed onto his shoulder. When he spared a glance, he saw an expression besides condescension.

"Let's go. Quietly," the bandaged Genin whispered. His tone held no room for argument, but Naruto wasn't known for his tact.

"This is the room-" A hand cut him off, and prevented further sounds from him. He was soon directed up the stairs while no one was looking, much to the blonds confusion and anger.

At the top of the stairs, Naruto had enough. He stuck his tongue out, and therefore onto Sasuke-teme's hand. He felt his mouth gain its freedom, and his ears gained cursing from his effort.

"You disgusting imbecile! What leap of logic could have possessed you to think licking my hand was a good idea!?" The raven teen hissed waving his hand like it was drenched in acid. Naruto only replied by sticking his tongue out again. Their attention was drawn off each other and onto a swirl of leaves by a door labeled 301. They left gravity defying hair and an upturned eye.

"Hello my cute little Genins. I see all of you came. That's good." Sakura's brow furrowed for a moment, then she replied to the scarecrows insinuation.

"You say that like it would've been bad if one of us didn't come."

Kakashi-sensei hummed in thought. "You mean I didn't tell you?"

Naruto felt there was something he wasn't getting here. "Didn't tell us what! Stop making it so dramatic!"

"If you insist," the Jounin shrugged. "You can't take the Chunin exams without a team."

The orange wearing Genin was perplexed. Why did his sensei neglect to tell them? He would have voiced this out loud, but Sakura seemed to realise his meaning.

"You didn't want anyone pressured." It was heavily implied that the she was the one the statement applied to. Kakashi-sensei once again made a sound of confirmation and nodded.

"That and it's fun to mess with you."

Now all three were as tired looking as Sakura had been.

"To be serious, I'd say I'm proud you all made the decision on your own. I wouldn't have nominated you if I didn't think you were ready," their Sensei lectured. He held a single finger up. "Now don't let me down, and pass this exam!" His hands turned up a thumbs up reminiscent of the an unknown rival. In response his team nodded and let out their expressions of determination.

"We will."

"Hn."

"We're gonna ace it


He was completely and utterly screwed. Everything had been going so good, too…

-()-

When team seven entered the room, it wasn't hard to notice the sheer number of people in there. Nearly every desk would be filled. Of course, it was hard not to notice when everyone glared at the team upon arrival. The glares were making Sakura-chan uncomfortable, but both Naruto and the teme were unaffected. Naruto wasn't because he had suffered far worse. Sasuke couldn't care tension in Sakura's shoulders was dissipated when a voice he knew all too well was heard.

"Sasuke-kun!" The pale blond Genin, Sakura's rival in love, had thrown herself at the poor bastard. He had recognized the voice as well, but the Yamanaka was no slouch when it came to intelligence. She yelled after jumping at him, giving no time to dodge. While Ino's antics irritated the pinkette, the presence of a familiar face eased the girls mind.

After a few moments of arguing among the frenemies, two more familiar faces showed up. These faces widened the grin on his face. "Hey Shikamaru, Choji!" The boy shouted, happy some of his few friends were taking the exam with him. Choji nodded, then proceeded to open a bag of chips. Nothing unordinary there. Shikamaru on the other hand, groaned.

"So your team is here to, Naruto?" His slouch lowered with every word. Then under his breath he muttered "What a drag."

"The only one being a drag is you," Ino huffed, arms crossed. Somewhere along the line, Sasuke had gotten her off, and was a great distance from all of us. Shikamaru, like the lazy-ass he was, just shrugged and sighed.

Another loud voice echoed through the room, this one also friendly for Naruto. "So, the dead last is here to. Did ya prank your Jounin-sensei into submission?"

The addressed blond shrugged flippantly and replied "I don't know, did your Jounin-sensei get tired of the smell of wet dog?" to the Inuzuka. He smirked when his question had been answered with like, stretching the fang marks on his cheeks.

"Maybe you should both tone it down a little." A voice none of the rookies recognized broke through. They saw a grey haired teen with glasses and kind eyes. The teen smiled at them, and continued with "The other Genin are… antsy. You might want to keep off their bad side."

The older Genin prompted a wave of confirming looks. Naruto could very well see what he meant.

"Seeing as you're rookies, I'll lend some of my help." the teen offered, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. "My name is Yakushi Kabuto."

"What could you do to help us?" Kiba asked, more curious than condescending.

"I've got prior experience with these exams."

Sakura joined in and put forward a question. "How many times have you taken these exams, two or three?"

The Genin looked embarrassed, sheepishly rubbing his neck before glancing at the floor and mumbling 'Seven times."

The wild Inuzuka burst into laughter. "Maybe we should be helping you."

The Grey haired teen laughed along, but then sobered up. "To be serious, I have learned that information is power. As such, I have collected a significant amount of info on the exams, examiners, and examinees.". He slipped a back of cards out of his pouch and showed them to the group. "These are nin-info cards."

"Nin-info cards? Why are they blank?" Ino inquired.

"Ah, but that's the conundrum. Info can do more harm than good if your enemies have it as well, so I encrypted the cards with my chakra."

The Nara gained an interest in these words and walked up to the Older Genin. "Encrypted with chakra, so how do you access it?"

His glasses glinted. "I simply channel my chakra into the cards. The info shows up as I do," he demonstrated, the card displaying a graph of which villages turned up, and how many Genin they sent.

"Can it do specific people?" A brooding voice demanded. Sasuke was back in the group, looked really eager for this.

"Who do you have in mind?"

"Sabaku no Gaara."

The teen pouted. "You're making it easy, giving names. I was hoping for a challenge." The Genin still did as asked. "Sabaku no Gaara, 8 C-ranks, and 1 B-rank. His teammates are Kankurou and Temari, both of which are the children of the Kazekage. His sensei is a well respected Jounin of Suna, Baki." So far, no one seemed all that impressed. Sure a B-rank is impressive, but not unheard of. "But get this, it is rumored that he has gotten back from every mission without a scratch."

Now that got their attention. Specifically Sasuke's. He was practically shivering in anticipation.


With all that info, Naruto was sure the test was gonna be easy.

Yet, the first test was written. Written. Who in the hell thought that math is needed to be Chunin? The blond glared at the problems, head in his hands. His team had passed an A-rank mission, and he didn't understand or care about math at all. Not to mention he had to concentrate with who he was next to.

On Naruto's right, was a Kusa kunoichi with the creepiest laugh he'd ever heard. And he'd heard the goddamn Kyubi no Kitsune laugh in Wave. On his left… well he now found someone scarier than that gourd dude.

It was after Kabuto had called the Sound village insignificant.

-()-

"Who are you calling insignificant?" That question was all Kabuto was given before being attacked . Apparently, that was all the warning he needed. The glasses wearing Genin backstepped a straight punch from a ninja covered in bandages. His only identification was a hitai-ate with a musical note on it.

Naruto jumped when Kabuto suddenly keeled over and let out the contents of his stomach. "What happened!?" He yelled, "We saw Kabuto dodge the hit!"

The mummified Genin chuckled. It was a deep rumbling sound; far too mature to be considered childish. He would have answered, but another ninja attacked.

This one from Taki.

-()-

Naruto may not have been the best of students, okay he was really not the best of students. But even he knew the relationship between Taki and Konoha. This made it all the more astonishing when one appeared to be helping Kabuto.

Only they weren't.

Shivers of fear and disgust racked his form as he glanced to his left nervously.

-()-

A hand came out of nowhere and grabbed the strange device on the Oto-nins arm. The assailant was a girl about their age. Her garb consisted of standard black shinobi sandals, and navy pants a shade lighter. The ends were secured with deep red wrappings in order to prevent noise when moving. The top she wore was navy and long sleeved, but just as form fitting. It left little of her shape to the imagination. The sleeves if the outfit were kept from rustling in a similar manner to her pant legs. The outfit was finished by metal plated fingered gloves, and a standard hitai-ate on her forehead. Her body was only partially developed, as the norm for their age. She had long crimson hair nearly reaching her knees, and eyes a bright but dulled green.

Her eyes held no warmth, compassion, or any other human emotion. A voice, so monotone that it put automated answering machines to shame, spoke.

"You are annoying. Die."

Her hand crushed the gauntlet in a cacophony of screeching metal and tearing muscles, its sound only drowned out by the screams of the Oto-nin in which it belonged to. She let go, only to reach for the shaking Genin's neck.

She would have crushed it too, if the proctor hadn't shown up.

-()-

Those eyes were so empty. The girl showed no sadistic satisfaction, no regret, nothing. It terrified him, it was like she wasn't human at all. Hell, if she hadn't of moved, he would assume she was dead.

Despite the gruesome demonstration, something familiar about her rang in his head. He knew he missed something. Something was just off about her.

He sincerely prayed she wouldn't kill him before the second part of the test.


It had been near an hour. An hour of his creepy seat-mates, of his teammates glaring holes through his head. Everything was riding on that tenth question.

Currently, the normally hyperactive blond had his head in his arms. He would have kept them there, but the sound of someone returning, and the proctor saying "I hope your trip was enlightening," brought him back to reality. Within a minute of this interaction Ibiki called time up. Then he made up new rules.

Who does that? Only children make up new rules halfway through the game! Now it didn't matter if he had or hadn't answered the previous questions. The thought of staying a Genin forever… no. He wouldn't let it stop him. No.

"No."

The proctor raised an eyebrow at him. "What was that? Quitting?"

The orange Genin raised his hand shakily. Ibiki smirked, thinking he'd given up. That thought went right out of everyone's mind when he slammed his hand on the desk with enough force to crack it.

"Screw you. I don't care if I have to stay a Genin forever. I'm not leaving."

"Oh?" The proctor questioned, "Are you sure you want to risk that?"

The blond growled, hands balling into fists. "I'm sure as hell! I don't care if I can't get up in rank. You don't have to be a Chunin to become the Hokage. I'll be field promoted into the position if I have to."

The proctor smiled when Naruto continued to stare at him, and the stemmed flow of ninja didn't start back up.

"Very well. You all pass."


Poor Hinata and Shino :(, Naruto didn't even notice them.

A/N: As you can see, I introduced my first OC. I can only hope the introduction didn't bore you.