Good night, guys! :) I am making an effort to write faster so you can enjoy the new material, so if you don't love me already, you must change your mind. :D I apologize in advance for all the mistakes due to my fast writing. :D I know it took long for the story to actually take off, but I like to build the stories and don't rush so you enjoy the storyline. I know it's maybe difficult to understand the reason why the interesting part is starting now, but I hope you stay with me. I'm begging you. LOL Anyway, let's get to the interesting part of this update. :)
Theartofkeepincool: Thank you! It's nice to see people addicted to the story. :D
Yulebrinner25: Your wish is my command. I hope you enjoy this chapter, even though the drama is a little bit overwhelming. The scene you described, it won't happen… YET. xD
Guest 1: LOL Thanks for the compliment.
Guest 2: 3 :D
MJ: You know I love cliffhangers. I had been thinking about that moment for a long time now. I admit I was willing to get the "I love you" part. :) I hope you did good at the exams. ;) Thank you for your nice words. ;)
An: Yeah, poor Emily. Paige will have a normal reaction, I guess. :D
Alexzmc: I hope it gets better, I'll do everything on my hands to get there. :D I'm glad you enjoyed last chapter. ¡Muchas gracias!
jofi: Have you really give it a thought to the killing me part? I mean, the story would end like that. Just think about it. :D Thank you for your nice words and for not trying to end with my life. xD
Enjoy the chapter, guys!
IT'S NEVER TOO LATE
: Chapter 13 – Choosing Sides:
Why did I say that? I should havenot said a word. Shouting my feelings towards her was not my best decision. She keeps staring at me, I can feel her gaze, but I just look down at the floor. I am a coward and I can't look her in the eye and face her after dropping the bomb.
"Em, look at me." I don't do what she says, though. I don't want her to feel pity for me, because I can't stop the tears coming from inside my already puffy eyes. "Please," she insists, placing her hand on my chin and making me raise my head and deal with her. "I'm really sorry, okay?" I can see honesty in her eyes. "I'm deeply sorry I hurt you. I guarantee you I had no idea." She approaches me and tries to hug me but I stop her just in time. I know she's trying to be comprehensive and nice, but I hate that I opened myself to her and she feels sorry about me. I feel really embarrassed. I had only felt in love with my previous girlfriend, Maya. But this time is more hurtful 'cause I know we will never be an item. It sucks falling for a straight girl.
"Please, don't," I add, almost whispering. I don't have strength to speak. But I don't want her to touch me.
"I understand you hate me right now, but I don't deserve this." She's calm, but I know rejecting her hug made her feel a little bit bad. It's understandable. I mean, it's not her fault that I'm madly in love with her, but I don't obviously care about her feelings right now. I'm having enough trouble to deal with my feelings and I'm not thinking about putting myself in her position.
"I'm sorry, but I told you not to come. Could you please…?" I put my hand on the door, trying to make her understand that I want her to leave. I need to be alone. This is too much to handle right now.
"Are you kicking me out? Em, please, let's talk" she begs me, using her sad puppy eyes to make me feel sorry about her.
"There's nothing to talk about, Paige. The truth is out and there's nothing you can do to make me feel better." Actually there is, but she obviously is not up for it.
I hear the noise of the elevator and suddenly Spencer gets out of it, frowning at the both of us. She realizes something is going on, 'cause I didn't invite Paige to come inside. Besides, I guess the tension between the two of us is palpable and Spencer is not dumb.
"Hi," she briefly adds, trying not to bother. Paige doesn't get out of her way, making it difficult for my friend to get inside her place. "Could you please…?" she politely starts saying, but I seize the moment to interrupt her.
"Actually, Paige was just leaving." She looks at me with disdain, turns around and leaves without saying a word.
Spencer comes in and I slam the door, trying to vent my anger unsuccessfully. The frustration I'm feeling won't go away that easily.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Spencer asks, looking me from the corner of the eye while she makes a sandwich on the counter of the kitchen.
"I just need to sleep. I'm not in the mood to talk, Spence."
"It's okay, Em. Can you at least tell me what was all that about? I mean, not the whole story, but, you know…" she says.
"The jealousy made me admit to her that I love her."
"What?" The surprise on her face is something I wasn't expecting from her.
"She's fooling around with a guy and I got jealous. I exploded and told her I'm in love with her. Anyway, it doesn't matter because she won't love me back, so…"
"I'm really sorry, Em. Anyway, you were honest and I know you must feel like shit, but at least she knows the truth, right?" Her words are not really comforting, but she kind of has a point. There are no secrets between us now. Even if this is really tough, hiding my feelings was not a healthy decision. "Go rest, okay? Tomorrow will be a new day." She hugs me and I head my bedroom knowing that falling sleep will be a difficult task. Tomorrow won't be a new day, though. She is wrong about that. I will still have to deal with Paige and Jason and not talking to Paige is not an option 'cause we work hand in hand with her.
I wake up the next day after a rough night. When I look outside the window I see that is raining in torrents. It's like the universe has decided to put on the same level as my mood. I have a hot shower with the hope of making me feel better or at least not like shit. It doesn't work though. I get dressed and have breakfast. Actually, I just drink a cup of coffee and leave. My stomach doesn't feel like having something solid. I usually am really hungry every morning, but today is not of these days. I hate that it affects me so much, 'cause I'm not a teenager anymore. Besides, I know going to work is not going to make me feel any better. If I didn't work right next to her, then maybe being focused on work would help to stop thinking about everything, but it's not the case. And Jason will be there too, so it couldn't get any worse. I walk to the office looking like a zombie. I looked at the mirror before leaving the apartment and you can tell that I've had a rough night a mile away. I call for the elevator and get to my floor. The first thing I see when I walk the corridor and head to my office is Paige and Jason kissing. I guess it's my lucky day. Paige pulls away from the kiss when she hears my steps. I try not to look at her and keep looking down at the floor so I don't have to meet her eyes, but my eyes react differently and gaze at her. She's flushing, not because of me I guess. I avert her gaze and continue walking, trying to get to my desk as soon as possible so I don't have to deal with the happy couple. I turn the computer on and avoid looking at the corridor. I open a few files and start working on the blueprints I've to improve so Paige can work with them. Everything reminds me of her. I take the headphones and put them on, with the intention of making me focus on the music. After a few minutes absorbed in listening to the loud music and working on the project, I hear a noise, but don't pay attention to it. I suddenly see Paige standing in front of me. She takes my headphones off and I have no choice but to pay attention to her.
"Were you ignoring me?"
I shake my head. "I had the music really loud. I didn't notice you were here." I'm not lying.
"Is it going to be like this from now on?"
"What are you talking about?" She sighs. She knows I'm playing dumb.
"I'm sorry about earlier, okay? I will try not to do things like that in front of you. But, please, don't treat me like this."
"Things like kissing your boyfriend?" She flushes. "I'm an adult, Paige. I can handle that. I don't know why I told you that. It was a big mistake. Can you forget it?"
"How could I forget it? I can't, Emily. However, I want things to be like before." She looks sad.
"That's not possible, Paige. Things have changed. I need space." She frowns at me. I know she didn't like my 'ultimatum', but this is what's best for me. "Now, I have work to do," I add while pointing at the screen of the computer. I didn't want to sound rude, but this is the only way for her to give me a break, even if it hurts. She doesn't say a word and takes a seat, her perfume invading the room as she walks next to me. She smells so good that it makes my heart beat faster. She has that kind of effect on me.
After a few minutes, a knock on the door startles me. Jason opens the door and looks at Paige with a huge smile plastered on his face. He's definitely so into her, and I don't blame him.
"I'm sorry," he says looking at me. "So… I'll meet you after work then, right?" He was talking with her, and not talking too, just a few minutes ago. Why does he have to rub it in my face? I mean, I guess he doesn't know I have feelings for her, but coming here to say that is just stupid. That means they're hanging out after work. It's sad that the only plan I have after getting out of work is to eat pizza and ice cream while watching bad quality television.
Paige nods at him and then looks at me. I pretend not being sad, but I know she knows me better. He winks at her and leaves the office with that smile tattooed on his face.
The morning passes by as usual, but today I reject Paige's offer to go get coffee. When she comes back with a coffee on her right hand and occupies her chair, my phone starts buzzing. I see Spencer's name on the screen.
"Hey, Spencer. What's up?" It's not like her to call when she's at work, so this must be something important. I realize Paige is looking from the corner of her eye. She's obviously paying attention to the conversation.
"I know you had a shitty day yesterday, and I don't want to upset you more after everything that happened yesterday." I don't know what happened, but she's getting me scared.
"Just tell me already. Did something bad happen?"
"I guess you deserve to know the truth. Maya showed at the apartment this morning. I thought it was you, because you always forget to bring your keys, so I opened the door and there she was standing, right in front of me." My heart stops pumping for a few seconds. I definitely don't believe in Karma. I'm a nice person and I just have bad news.
"How did she…? I mean… I know she was supposed to move here, but I didn't expect…" I can't follow the sentence. This is too overwhelming.
"I guess she thought you were living with me, so she came here looking for you. I'm sorry, Em."
"How does she know where you live? Did Aria tell her that?" If Aria told her, I'm going to kill her.
"No, she didn't. Do you remember coming to visit me a few years ago? I suppose she remembered the address." I had completely forgotten about our trip to the city.
"This is a fucking disaster." I sigh once more, but the anger won't go away. "I don't need this right now." Paige is still staring at me.
"I'm sorry, Em. They need me at the O.R. Can we talk later? Just take it easy, okay?"
I say goodbye to my friend and end the call. Paige is gazing at me, but I have no intention to tell her Maya is back.
"Maya is here, am I right?" I hate that she's so intelligent. I told her about my ex and that she was moving here, but I didn't expect she would deduce that only hearing the conversation I just had with Spencer.
"It's not your business, Paige. I'm not in the mood to have more awkward conversations," I stop her harshly. I know I'm being a little bit unfair, but I need to vent my anger off and she's became my punching bag. She shakes her head and ignores me. I guess her patience with me is not endless.
If I already was having a hard time to concentrate on work with Paige sitting next to me, now that I know that Maya is here is even more difficult. That's why I keep checking the hour, 'cause I'm dying to get home so I don't have to bear with this tension. After a very long afternoon, I leave the office to head home. Paige left just five minutes ago. I was actually waiting for her to leave first, because I didn't want to leave at the same time in order to avoid another awkward conversation.
The moment I step on the sidewalk, my world falls apart. The woman I despise so much is just standing in front of me with that evil grin that I end up hating but I found adorable when I met her. I always find that charming. I have to admit I have a thing for badass girls and Maya fits that description perfectly.
"Hey, beautiful. I've been waiting for this moment to happen since you abandoned me." She takes a step closer and tries to embrace me, but I take a step back to avoid her. "Come on, Em!" And just to improve my day I see that Paige and Jason are witnessing the whole scene.
"Don't touch me, okay?" I push her a little bit and she smiles. I know she's enjoying this moment. I start walking and she follows me. She's not going to give up so easily.
I hear some steps behind us and I suddenly see Paige standing between the two of us. She's panting, she run to get here. She speak when she recovers her breath.
"Is everything okay, Em?" She looks at Maya condescendingly and I suddenly feel better. She's really sweet, she's just irresistible.
"Everything's fine, Paige. Thanks." However, tears are covering my face. It's too much emotions for just one day and I can't help but cry.
"I guess you were leaving, right?" Paige asks Maya. Even though it was a question, it sounds like an order. The harshness in her voice makes Maya frown at the both of us.
"I'll see you soon, baby," she says with a grin on her face before leaving the two of us alone. She gave up this time. Thank god Paige was here for me. Otherwise, she would keep torturing me.
I can't stop crying. It's like I'm finally relieving all the bad things that happened to me today. "Come here," Paige adds, opening her arms. However, she doesn't move, making me make the move. I embrace her tightly. I don't want this hug to end.
"Thank you. I really appreciate this," I honestly add.
"Where are you going?" she asks when I stark walking towards my place. She holds my arm, making me stop.
"Is Spencer at home?" I shake my head. "I won't leave you alone. After seeing Maya… I mean, you need company."
"I'm fine," I insist. I feel like shit, but I don't think being alone will make my day worse after everything that happened.
"I will buy you a cup of coffee, then get some take-away and have dinner at my place. I mean… only if you want to," she mumbles nervously. I would love to accept her offer, but I don't know if this will be good for me considering everything that's going on.
"You had plans with Jason." I point at the blonde guy that's waiting for Paige across the street. "I'm fine, don't worry about me," I insist.
"Wait here, okay?" She turns around and runs towards his boyfriend. I see them talking to each other and afterwards Paige comes back. Jason lefts after Paige waves at him. "Let's go get a huge cappuccino." She grins at me and I can't help but love her even more.
When we get inside the diner, Hanna looks at us in great surprise. She witnessed our fight and she must be surprised we already reconciled. She takes our order and disappears, leaving the two of us alone. Neither of us say a word for a few seconds. I decide to break the silence.
"You didn't have to do this," I admit.
"I wanted to. You're important to me."
"You had plans with your boyfriend and I spoiled them." She laughs.
Her laughter disappears, a straight face replacing it. "I'm really sorry about everything, Em."
"You don't have to apologize. I was a dick, I'm sorry about that."
"I understand that you're hurt and that you hate me a little bit for being so blind and hanging out with Jason now." She blushes.
"I will never hate you." She smiles at me.
"How are we going to handle this?" She finally asks the question I've been thinking about all day.
"Uh…" I take a deep breath before I continue speaking. "I can't spend a lot of time with you. We were spending so much time together and I loved it, but it was actually hurting me." She sighs. "Besides, you have Jason now," I tease her.
"Jason is not like you. You're irreplaceable, Fields," she says winking at me at the same time. Even though she says those words like she was telling a joke, I know she means it and it makes me feel butterflies in my stomach.
To be continued…
Stay tuned! ;)
