Sorry about the long gap between chapters, folks... I'd lost the motivation to write for quite a while there. But we're back with a new chapter, and hopefully it's the start of a new streak of chapters. Hopefully.
Forged in Fire, Chapter 44: Acceptance
PPI R&D Offices
Sacramento, CA
August 14, 2025
1157 PDT
"Look, every time you guys tinker with it, it doesn't get any better! So QUIT MESSING WITH IT!"
Hermann hurried out of the path of Stephanie as she rolled out the door of the offices. "I take it that the MAX is having issues still."
"No shit, Sherlock. I'm about ready to call it quits and leave." Stephanie glared over her shoulder. "I mean, I understand that they think they're helping... But this..." She waved at her wheelchair. "This is part of who I am now. A reminder of how massively Kennedy and I fucked up the Seattle drop."
"I don't recall it being, as you so crudely put it, a 'fucked up' drop."
"We didn't stop the Kaiju before landfall. Hell, it got almost all the way up Puget Sound before we managed to engage it."
"Casualties were surprisingly light, given the location of the battle."
"Hermann, just stop, okay? It's not helping."
Hermann scowled, but relented. "Then what would help, Ms. Lanphier?"
Stephanie sighed. "Just... convince your wife to leave me alone for now. Please?"
"I will do my best, but I give no promises."
Stephanie nodded and rolled down the sidewalk.
Hermann smiled and started towards the offices again, only to have to dodge Raleigh as he hurried out the door. "Steph, wait up just a second!"
"Rough day in the office, Mr. Becket?"
"Yeah... Oh, come on, Steph!" Raleigh took off after the other Ranger.
Hermann finally made it through the door and into the offices. "Vanessa?"
The new receptionist/secretary hooked a thumb in the direction of the hallway. "Break room. Quite an argument brewing there, so mind your head."
"Thank you for the warning." Hermann bowed his head and made his way down the hall, following the sounds of several voices.
"I'm telling you, we're not getting any improvements with it anymore. Steph's right."
"Nonsense. We've got a lot of data from her time in Hydra Corinthian to draw on, so I don't see why it's not reducing the feedback lag."
Hermann cleared his throat as he entered the room. "I... might have an answer to that, actually."
Vanessa set down her mug and wrapped Hermann in a hug. She switched to German for some privacy. "Hey. How's our daughter?"
"Sleeping soundly, thankfully. The sitter will contact me if things change." Hermann smiled, then turned to the rest of the group. "Now, about the the MAX issues..."
Mako quickly pulled out a tablet and handed it to Hermann, who waved it off. "We've made some coding changes..."
"And I don't have to look at them to tell you what's wrong." Hermann sat down in a chair, put his glasses on, and produced his own tablet. "You're using her data from Hydra Corinthian, yes?"
Caitlin looked over Hermann's shoulder as he pulled up some data. "Yeah. We figured it'd give us a head start."
Hermann nodded slowly and scrolled through lines of code. "But, isn't the data from any of the Jaegers going to be impacted by the second pilot?"
The room fell silent for a moment before a chorus of groans and curses broke out.
"I figured as much. As it turns out, the code's delay is because it keeps looking for that second pilot to also give feedback to. Ah, here it is." He held up the tablet for the team to see. "I took the liberty of replacing much of your work on signal processing and feedback with archival code from the first experiments with the Pons, with some refinements based off Dr. Lightcap's work for her prosthetic. It should be much faster at processing data... but it will require Ms. Lanphier to start from scratch again."
Mako groaned again and headed to the door. "Right. Going to make myself scarce for that conversation."
Caitlin gave a dismayed sigh and grabbed Mako's shoulder. "Nope, team effort. She can't kick all of our butts at the same time. Gottlieb, why would she need to start over?"
Hermann handed Caitlin the tablet with one hand and removed his glasses with the other. "Because you took the route that looked easiest to get a working prototype, not the route that would have led to a successful product. It would have worked for this one person, but would have been an abysmal failure for anyone else. Now, it has genetic algorithms for data processing, allowing the same base code to adapt to whoever uses it."
Vanessa kissed Hermann on the forehead. "Thank you, dear. Shall we go get some lunch while you're here?"
"Gladly." Hermann shut down his tablet. "Dr. Lightcap, I uploaded the new code to my partition of the PPDC server network. You should be able to find it under the 'MAX' folder."
Caitlin nodded. "Thank you, Dr. Gottlieb."
Hermann nodded once, tucked his tablet away, and headed for the door, leaving Mako to confer with Caitlin. "So... Want me to go get Steph?"
"If you would be so kind, Mako, that'd be much appreciated. I'll start the update and then go get us some lunch."
Mako nodded and hopped out of her chair. Now, where did she... Ah. Raleigh's with her. "Okay, I'll be back in a bit. I think Raleigh's finally convinced Steph to open up to him."
-.-.-
Five minutes earlier...
Raleigh jogged down the sidewalk in pursuit of Stephanie. "Steph, wait up!"
"No, Raleigh. Just leave me alone."
"Steph... You know I can't do that right now." Raleigh caught up with her and slowed to a walk. "We need to talk. About you."
Stephanie stopped her wheelchair and set the parking brakes. "Raleigh, I don't want to talk right now. Just please give me some space."
"I've given you space, and you're using it to avoid this talk. You knew it was coming."
Stephanie looked at the ground in front of her, pointedly avoiding Raleigh's knowing look. "Yes."
"I know there's no good time for this, but the longer you put it off, the harder it will be." He sat down on the grass and stared through the nearby fence at the bustling flightline. "We need to talk about the Seattle drop."
Stephanie scoffed. "What's to tell? I know you've read the report."
"I have. But that's the the official, clinical report." He smiled. "But, we're both experienced Rangers, and we know that the reports can't capture everything. There are things that only another Ranger could understand. Things that we leave out of the official reports because no one on the brass would believe us."
"Yeah." Stephanie sighed.
"So... what happened?"
Stephanie watched a fire tanker taxi past before responding. "Well, it all went to shit right from the start. He was well inside the Straits of Juan de Fuca by the time we made it up from Los Angeles, so we dropped into the shipping channel about ten miles north of Elliot Bay, trying to head the bastard off. Turned out that he was prepared for our usual grab-and-smash opener."
"Oh?"
"You ever seen a hagfish before?"
"Not in person, no-oh. The slime."
"Yep. We laid hands on him, and all of a sudden we're enveloped in this thick black cloud of goop, and the Kaiju just blitzes past us at twenty knots as pretty as you please. By the time we got clear of the cloud of slime and cleared the intakes, he was halfway to Seattle."
"So you raced after him across the mudflats."
"Probably not one of our brighter ideas, but it was faster than swimming or trying to run in two hundred feet of water or so. Got there just as he made the turn into Elliot Bay proper and tried to grab him again. Another burst of slime and he headed towards the cruise ship terminal."
"Right. So you chased him into the gap between the piers."
"Yeah, and we finally were able to land our first blow. Dear God, that crackling feeling when you land a solid blow and the bones in the Kaiju yield... It felt so damn good to finally get that. Kennedy was grinning from ear to ear."
Raleigh smiled as he recalled the feeling. "Yeah, that is a good feeling. You know you've hurt it."
"Exactly." Stephanie sighed and stared into the distance. "Then it finally got its feet under it and bucked hard against our legs and knocked us back a few steps. Gave it the room it needed to make a run towards downtown."
"And then?"
"We finally brought out the claws and got a solid grip on him. Twirled him around and tried to toss him towards deeper water."
"So, why'd he wind up going towards the port?"
"You ever grabbed a lizard by the tail?" Seeing Raleigh shake his head, Stephanie sighed. "A lizard's tail can break off as an escape mechanism. This Kaiju could do the same, leaving us with his tail in our hands and the body flying towards the port. So we chased after him and tried to grab him in the port. Finally managed to tackle him by kicking him into the football stadium. Sorry about that, by the way. I know you love your Seahawks, but..."
"I know. Sometimes you just need to have an empty building to drop on a Kaiju to slow it down."
"Yeah. So we tackle him and wrap him up in a bear hug."
"And that's when he dug his hind legs into your right leg and tore it loose."
There was a lengthy silence. "You know better than most Rangers what that feels like, Raleigh."
"Yeah. I do. Hurts like hell."
Mako walked up and silently sat down with Raleigh.
Stephanie eyed Mako for a moment before continuing. "It really did hurt. Not just the loss of the limb... the electrical burns."
Mako slid up a sleeve to reveal her own set of scars around her right shoulder. "Marks of a seasoned Ranger, no?"
"Yeah, but this was worse than the usual localized overloads from battle damage. It threw us off balance, you know? Like when you get hit upside the head real hard in the Kwoon when someone doesn't pul their punch." Steph paused, obviously fighting back tears. "And that's when Kennedy just... knew. Somehow, some way, she knew this was the end of the line for us." Another pause. "I guess I did too, to an extent. I mean, we both knew... we all knew, that sometimes, the only victory is one where both sides die. And we always knew, to an intellectual extent, that each drop could be our last. But... it never seems real, the fact that you could actually die out there, doesn't really sink in until you're staring the Grim Reaper in the face and you realize he's staring back."
Mako and Raleigh nodded in unison, fully aware of the feeling.
"But, yeah. Kennedy just... got real quiet, even in the Drift. It was only a moment, barely long enough to register for us, let alone for the data logs. But... she was at peace with the fact that she was probably about to die. And then, it was over, and... she hit the trigger on Hydra's Breath." Steph closed her eyes and hung her head. "Next thing that I remember, we were sailing through the air over the port, tumbling, and I remember watching the loose bits of crap knocked loose floating around and then, I realized that the ground was getting awful close and..."
Raleigh got up and wrapped an arm around Stephanie's shoulders. She leaned forward and started to fall from her wheelchair. Shitshitshit.
Mako was suddenly at Steph's other side and helped her down onto the grass alongside the sidewalk. "Hey. Steph, you okay?"
Stephanie started sobbing and curled up as best she could.
Raleigh eased her into his lap and held her. "Shhhh... Let it out. Mako, gimme a hand here."
"With what?" Mako was visibly confused and alarmed.
"Back pocket, left side, I have a small pack of tissues. Could you...?"
Mako fished the plastic package out and removed one. "Here."
"Thanks. Hey, it's okay, Steph. Here, take this." He handed Stephanie the tissue, who nodded and grabbed it.
Mako looked on, worried. "Should I... I don't know, go get someone?"
Raleigh shook his head. "Nah, we got this. Cait and Herc have enough to worry about right now."
Mako nodded and sat down next to Raleigh. "So... what now?"
Raleigh hugged Stephanie again. "We let Steph vent some more, be here for her. She'll talk again when she's ready."
Mako sighed and leaned against Raleigh. "Were you like this after...?"
"Not exactly, no. Didn't have two friends to comfort me." He smiled sadly for a moment. "But the rest of it, yeah." Raleigh sighed and looked into the distance. "Having your copilot violently torn from the Drift like that... It's not easy on your psyche." He looked at Mako. "You've felt some of it, but that's... It's like seeing the aftermath of a car crash. You can see that it was violent, can see what happened... but you weren't there. It's a different thing altogether to be in the middle of it."
Mako nodded slowly, recalling Raleigh's RABIT back in January.
There was a long pause before Stephanie blew her nose and tossed the tissue aside. "h-How..."
Raleigh took a long, slow breath. "How did it feel to me?"
Stephanie nodded slowly.
"Like you said, there was a brief moment of... clarity? Acceptance? Yancy knew that he wasn't going to make it." Raleigh hung his head and closed his eyes. "He accepted that fact, but it didn't make it any less terrifying. There's a feeling of... Helplessness, I guess? Knowing that whatever happens is beyond your control."
Stephanie nodded again.
"And then... Knifehead pulled him away. There was a brief flash of pain as his legs hit the Conn Pod hull, and then... Gone. Nothing." Raleigh tilted his head back and opened his eyes to the summer skies. "And then you realize it at every level. Your copilot, the one person in the world who knows you, the person who you've linked minds with and shared so much... They're gone, and they're not coming back. It feels like the world's just dropped out from under you and torn your soul out with it."
Mako nodded slowly. "I think that's just part of the feeling of loss, but still..."
Stephanie nodded again and plucked another tissue from the package. "And after that?"
Raleigh looked her square in the eyes. "After I woke up in the hospital, I was... off balance. Not physically, but emotionally. The bond you form in the Drift... It's more than just memories. I heard the Jessops describe it as having a fragment of your soul stay with your copilot. But when your copilot dies... so does that fragment. And since you've made a space in your mind, your soul, for that fragment... it leaves a hole there in the shape of your copilot."
"So... how do I close that hole? Drift with someone new?"
"No. Honestly, I think that'd make it worse, if you Drifted while the 'wound' is fresh. Like... like trying to use a torn muscle too soon."
Stephanie's gaze grew distant. "But you Drifted with Mako."
Mako frowned. "Only after nearly five years. And honestly, it was a gamble according to the 'experts' in Neurosci."
Raleigh nodded. "Besides, our first Drift was rougher than most. Strong, sure, but... turbulent, and filled with hazards and dangers you can't see in the flow. Like a river swollen with snowmelt in spring."
Stephanie nodded slowly, still gazing into the distance. "So, what can I do? Just carry on like nothing happened?"
"No, not like that. You do need to carry on, but ignoring your losses, hiding from them... that's not healthy. Trust me."
Mako gently smacked the back of Raleigh's head. "Yes, you would know about that, wouldn't you."
"Hey, at least I can provide some advice. Not all of it will be helpful as I can only speak for what worked for me. You'll be different, Steph, as will the techniques that do and don't work for you. Just... let us know if you need help. That's what friends are for."
Stephanie took a deep breath, nodded slowly, and looked at her wheelchair. "Yeah... Thank you, Raleigh. You were right... I needed this talk. It's painful, yes, but needed."
Mako caught Stephanie's gaze at her chair. "Want help getting in, or do you have things under control?"
"Nah, I got it. Thanks for asking, though." Stephanie levered herself back into her chair. "So, you guys figure out what was going wrong with the damned suit? Because if the answer is no..." She fixed Mako with a pointed glare.
Mako nodded. "Yes, it took an outsider's perspective to get us on the right track, but we are pretty confident that we've got it nailed down at this point. We're compiling the new code over lunch. If... you're willing to keep going. If not, I understand."
Raleigh nodded at the two women. "I'll go see who drew lunch duty today. See you back at the office."
Stephanie nodded back at Raleigh, then turned back to Mako. "How much of a setback are we talking?"
Mako grimaced and looked at her feet. "Pretty much a fresh start, in terms of actually testing the suit and training the computer." She looked back at Stephanie and met her gaze. "I know, it's taking longer than we'd hoped, but..."
"Hey, that's R&D for you." Stephanie shrugged. "Shit happens." She released the parking brakes on her wheelchair and started rolling back to the offices. "Just keep in mind, that I'm just testing this. No guarantees I'll ever use it myself, or that all paraplegics will want to use it, either. Some folks are perfectly fine with wheelchairs."
Mako walked alongside Stephanie. "Oh, no. That's not the point. The point is to provide people with options. If they want to use a MAX in addition to, or in place of, a wheelchair, that's their call, not ours. But that's still a ways out. We need to prove it works first."
"Mmmm, good point... Which is where I come in." Stephanie nodded slowly. "But, a single data point doesn't make a trend or pattern. We'll need other testers."
"Again, let's not get ahead of ourselves. If we can't fix that feedback bug, this won't work for anyone."
"Also a good point. Let's get some lunch, then. We've got a long afternoon in the hangar ahead of us, I suspect."
Mako stopped and faced Stephanie. "You sure you're okay with this? I don't want to force you into this..."
"Well, Raleigh said that I should carry on. And I still want to help make people's lives better, even if I can't do so from the Conn Pod anymore. And this is probably the closest I'll ever come to strapping into a Jaeger again. So yeah, I want to do this." She started rolling again with a sly smile. "But first, lunch. You know how crabby I get when I'm hungry."
