The part of Chrys's mind that made her a good hunter hadn't been used for a long time. The normal, boring life she'd been living didn't require any of that knowledge, or any of those instincts.
But it was kicked into high gear now.
Slowly, not taking her eyes off of the thing that looked like her dead soulmate, she moved to behind the bar.
"Chrys?" Bella asked, fear tinging her tone. "What's wrong?"
"Get behind me, Bells," Chrys said softly as she reached her destination.
"Why… Chrys!" Bella hissed in shock as Chrys pulled the sawed off that she kept under the register out and pointed it at "Sam."
"Behind me, Bella," Chrys snapped. She relaxed a fraction when the redhead obeyed. Then she focused on the thing in front of her.
"What are you?"
"Chrys, it's me. I'm back." His voice, the voice that had whispered sweet nothings into her ear. Hearing it come from the thing in front of her rocked Chrys, but she tried to stay focused.
"No, you're not," she said softly. "Sam's in hell. Sam couldn't have possibly gotten out of hell. So what the fuck are you?"
"Sam?" Bella whispered behind her. "Sam Winchester?"
"Chrys," the thing insisted, "I'm human. I'm me. I'll do the tests if you want, I'll prove it."
Before Chrys could answer, the door banged open. Keeping the gun pointed at "Sam," she looked over to see Dean coming in, green eyes wide.
His stance, the way he stood next to Sam and put his hands up, and the nervous way he was eyeing the gun, told her everything she needed to know.
Hurt and shock bloomed in her chest. "Dean?" she whispered.
"C, it's okay. It's him, I checked. We got him back."
She slowly made her way around the bar, gun still held up, grappling with her emotions. "How?" she asked brokenly.
"Long story," Dean said a beat too quickly. His eyes met hers, begging, and she understood.
We're lying to Sam. Again.
Bella Pangborn was not a stupid woman. She knew what was about to happen.
From the moment Chrys had come up front, she'd been more animated than she had been since the first night Bella had met her. Something about her was more… Alive, crackling with energy. Bella didn't understand how Sam was back. She did, however, understand that Chrys was going to go with him when he left.
Since Sam and Chrys had laid eyes on one another, it had been like Bella wasn't even there. There were only two people in her bar now, and she wasn't one of them. The intensity between Sam and Chrys far outweighed anything Bella had ever seen, much less experienced.
Bella Pangborn was not a stupid woman. But she did have her pride. So she held in her tears and watched the scene before her unfold, already mentally bracing for heartbreak.
Sam couldn't believe how good Chrys looked. She was gorgeous, like she'd always been. She was like some sort of avenging goddess, holding him at gunpoint with fury and betrayal burning in her blue eyes.
"Okay, fine," she spat. "We'll put a fucking pin in how the fuck this is happening. I guess. What are you doing here?"
That brought him up short. "What… What do you mean? I came for you."
She laughed, and the bitter, sharp sound made him want to go to her, wrap his arms around her and try to take her pain away. But he knew very well that Chrys didn't point guns at people she wasn't willing to shoot, so he stayed where he was.
"Sam, I haven't just been waiting for you to come back. I have a life now, I'm not just going to leave it to follow you around the country again."
Before Sam could reply, a sweet, soft voice interrupted. "C," the little redhead said, lacing a hand on Chrys's arm. "I think everyone needs to chill. Let's get some drinks, and you put the gun down, okay?"
Chrys looked down at the other woman, but the barrel of the gun didn't move. "But what if I want to shoot him?"
Bella chuckled. "Chrys, baby, you always want to shoot someone."
The familiar way Bella and Chrys spoke chilled Sam's heart.
How long was I gone?
Dean would be forever grateful for Bella's cool head. And for her suggestion of drinking.
He sat at one of the barstools next to the petite woman, watching Sam and Chrys talk in a booth across the room. He was nursing a whiskey, Bella doing the same. That surprised him, she was usually more of a beer drinker.
"So, that's the famous Sam," she said softly. He looked for bitterness in her words, but found only sadness.
"That's him," he agreed.
"And he wants Chrys to go with him."
Dean winced as he realized what Sam's resurrection would mean for Bella. "Uh… Yeah."
Bella knocked back her tumbler of whiskey and nodded. "All right then."
Dean frowned. "Bella, I'm sure she won't-"
"Yes, she will," Bella interrupted gently, and without anger. "Of course she's going to go. It's Sam." After a beat of silence, "She still says his name at night, you know."
Dean stared at her. "What?"
Bella nodded, her green eyes misty. "Yeah, I don't think she knows she still does it. But she does, like clockwork, at least once a night in her sleep. She says, 'Sam.'" She smiled at him sadly. "I've only ever loved one person that much, to still be dreaming about them a year and a half later. And if she comes to me then and asks me to go with her, no matter how dangerous or stupid or reckless it is, no matter how much peace I've built without her, I'll go with her in a second. In an absolute second." She took a deep breath and wiped her eyes. "So, yeah. She's going with him. and I'm all right with that."
"No, you're not," he said gently.
She chuckled darkly. "No, I'm not. But I'm going to be."
"I don't understand," Chrys said softly. "I mean… I don't understand."
Sam exhaled sharply and swirled the amber liquid in his cup. "Yeah, it's kind of a lot to take in."
She laughed harshly again. "Sam, it's not 'a lot to take in.' It's fucking insane."
They were quiet for a while, each lost in their own thoughts, then, "You cut your hair."
"Well, Sammy, you crawled out of hell, so I win on the whole, 'not telling each other stuff' front."
He held his hands up in surrender, but humor was twinkling in his eyes. "All right, fair point."
She took a deep breath, unsure of what to say to him. What do you say to someone, who you never got over, who should be dead?
She sighed. "Look, Sam. You've been gone, and I… I have Bella now. I can't just leave here."
He ran his hands through his hair. "Yeah, I, uh, I got that."
Chrys winced. "Look, I'm-"
"Sam?" They both turned to see Bella smiling sadly at them. "May I speak with Chrys for a moment?"
"Oh, um. Sure." He stood and looked at Chrys briefly, and it made her ache. It was a look that he would have given her… Before.
Bella slid into the booth across from Chrys and held out her hands. Automatically, Chrys leaned forward and took them in hers. "What a fucked up day," she said softly.
Bella smiled. "You're telling me." She took a deep breath, and Chrys absent-mindedly appreciated Bella's chest for a second. She's so lovely.
"C, you have to go."
Chrys blinked, then frowned. "What? Bells, I'm not just gonna up and leave you."
Bella nodded. "Yes, you are."
Chrys shook her head. "Bella, come on. I'm dating you, just because he appeared out of nowhere-"
"Stop, Chrys," Bella interrupted. "Just stop. Of course you're going."
"But-"
"Chrys, baby, you were never mine," Bella said sadly, her eyes filling with tears. "You were always his."
Chrys felt her own eyes filling, and she gripped Bella's hands hard. "Bella, I… I don't want to leave you."
"Well, then, I'm kicking you out," she said firmly, giving Chrys's hands a squeeze. "Go. You need him, and he needs you."
Chrys just stared at her miserably. Bella smiled. "Chrys, this is good news. You love Sam, and he's back. Be happy, baby."
Chrys shook her head. "I can't."
Bella smiled again. "You will." She sniffed and tugged her hands away from Chrys and stood. "Come on, stand up with me." Chrys obeyed, helpless against the beautiful woman in front of her. Bella reached up and ran her hands through Chrys's hair, fixing it. "You're gonna go to the apartment and get what you need to go. Leave a mailing address, so I can get the rest of it to you, and a list of our stuff you really want. Keep your key, in case you need it."
Chrys shook her head. "Bells-"
Bella put a finger to her lips. "No arguing with me, Summers." Bella smiled up at her again as a tear fell down her cheek. "Kiss me goodbye, C."
Chrys leaned down slowly and took Bella's face in her hands. She tried to convey everything she felt into the kiss she pressed to Bella's lips. She kissed her for a long time, exploring her, memorizing her.
She finally pulled away and pressed her forehead to Bella's. "Good day?" Bella whispered.
Chrys whimpered, and another tear fell down her cheek. "No."
Then Bella started crying in earnest.
Sam watched Chrys in the rearview, aching for her. He wanted to comfort her, to hold her and wipe the pain from her face. But she might rip his spine out his nostril, so he stayed in the front.
She was wearing headphones and ignoring them, so he turned to Dean. "So, her and Bella…"
Dean sighed. "Yeah, Bells is good people. This fucking sucks."
Sam shifted uncomfortably. "Were they… Did she…"
"Bella is head over heels for Chrys," Dean said softly. "Chrys loves Bella, but she never really got over you."
Sam sighed, but there was satisfaction rising in his chest. His woman couldn't get over him. Good.
"Listen, Sam," Dean said a beat later. "You're gonna have to give Chrys some time. She went through some rough stuff while you were gone."
"Did she-"
"I'm not talking about drugs, God dammit," Dean snapped. "As far as I know, she never used. But it was… It was bad, Sammy. She was real low for a real long time."
Sam frowned. "I get it, Dean, it'll take-"
"No, you don't, Sam." Dean said simply. "You can't."
Sam watched as Chrys took her bag, a different one than she'd had before, and grabbed one of the room keys from Dean before walking to her room and shutting it gently behind her. He heard the deadbolt click, and frowned.
"Give her time, Sammy," Dean said evenly. "I'm serious. Just… Give her a minute."
When Bella got home, she found a lot of Chrys's clothes gone, a few personal items missing, and the apartment key that had been Chrys's was on the kitchen counter.
She cried herself to sleep with it in her hand.
It was almost three in the morning, and Sam couldn't sleep. So he slowly got out of bed, so as not to disturb Dean. He dressed quickly, then walked out of the room and over to the one next door.
He debated with himself for a while on whether or not to knock. Dean had told him that Chrys would need time, and he knew that, and he wanted to respect that.
But he needed her. He needed her next to him, in his arms, her head resting on his chest. He couldn't sleep without her.
Before he could decide, the deadbolt clicked again, and the door opened to reveal Chrys, standing a long t-shirt and bare feet. Her hair was a tangled mess, telling him that she had been tossing and turning. Her eyes were red, telling him that she had been crying.
"What do you want, Sam?" she asked softly.
He ran a hand through his hair, suddenly cursing himself for being stupid enough to come over here. "I, uh, couldn't sleep."
"Tough," she snapped, and the door shut in his face.
He stayed where he was for a few moments, surprised. Dammit. She had gone back to being prickly and bitchy. He was all right with the prickly and the bitchy, he loved it, but she hadn't been that way to him for a long time.
The door opening again surprised him even more. "Get the fuck in here," she snapped. "It's cold outside."
"Chrys, if you don't want me-"
"Shut up, Sam, and lock the door behind you."
He did so and followed her into the room. She sat on the bed and buried her face in her hands. "This is so fucked."
He huffed out a little laugh. "Yeah, yeah, it is." She didn't move or say anything else, so he chanced it. "Are you doing okay?"
She looked up at him incredulously. "What do you think, Sam? How could I possibly be okay?"
She stood and walked away from him, running her hands through her hair, making it crazier. He tried for something else. "I, uh, I like the blue."
She rolled her eyes. "Shut up, Sam," she said softly, but there was no venom in the words this time. "I'm just going to dye over it now, I guess. If I ever have the chance."
He frowned. "Why?"
"Because I'm not going to have time to go to a salon every six weeks if we're hunting." He winced at her words, but she was already continuing. "I had a life," she said softly. "It was a good one. I had the bar, I visited Kev and Serene, Dean and Lisa. I had…" She swallowed hard. "I had Bells. And it was so… Easy to leave behind."
He frowned. "What do you mean?"
She turned to look at him. "Sam, all I had to do was pack a few clothes and some books and stuff. I mean, it took me twenty minutes, you were there. How…" Her chest heaved. "How can I be able to just leave a good life in twenty minutes? What did it even mean, if I just need twenty minutes to go?"
She cried for a few moments, then wiped her eyes hard and groaned. "I hate this," she whispered.
Sam watched her, the urge to go to her and comfort her almost overwhelming. But he was a little worried she would break his arm, or just break apart altogether, so he somehow managed to stay where he was. "Chrys, I-"
"You don't… You can't understand, Sam," she said softly, looking down at her feet, her arms wrapped around her middle.
"Understand what, b… Chrys?" Pet names probably aren't a good idea right now.
Her scoff told him that he'd heard it, anyway. "I can't explain it."
"Can you try?" This is going to kill me again.
She laughed again, a broken sound that made his chest ache. "I can't, Sam. I mean, how can I explain what this is like for me?" She looked up at the ceiling and ran her hands through her hair. "I… I think Bella hung the moon, Sam. I really do, she's amazing. But you're still what my stupid, stupid sun rises and sets on."
His eyebrows shot up, and she met his eyes, tears spilling down her cheeks. "Sam, I want to be in love with Bella so bad it hurts. I want to, I've been trying, and the fact that I can't is killing her. I want to be in love with her, but I can't stop being so goddamn relieved that you're back long enough to care."
The pain in her voice had him crossing the room in two long strides and pulling her into his arms. She went willingly, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her face into the skin just below his jaw as she cried. He put a hand on the back of her head and held her, closing his eyes in relief.
Finally.
**I've been planning the line, "Well, Sammy, you crawled out of hell, so I win on the whole, 'not telling each other stuff' front" almost since the day I started this fanfic.
**To the person who suggested that, "enough is enough," in reference to how many chapters it took me to bring Sam back: It's fanfiction. If you don't like how it's written, don't read it.
**Feedback gives me the warm fuzzies and keeps me going.
