Title insp. Foreign Language by Anberlin.
_

"Can't sleep either huh?" Jane's gruff voice sounds from darkness on the couch when she hears Maura pad in quietly.

Maura gasps, flicking on the kitchen light, "Oh, Jane… There you are! You scared me I thought-"

Jane sits up immediately, blinking against the harsh white light. Her feet hit the cold floorboards and she rises with long strides to meet Maura quickly, "Sorry, I- are you okay?"

She does not answer immediately and instead leans into Jane, winding her arms around the thin frame of her partner and ducking her head down to her shoulder, "Have I ever told you how much I enjoy the timbre of your voice?"

"No," Jane responds, caressing Maura's golden waves with one hand and her back with the other, "but something tells me you're about to enlighten me."

Maura smiles, taking comfort in being able to feel the resonating hum brought on by the vibration of Jane's vocal cords through their contact, "There's deepness in your voice that I find I can listen to indefinitely, even if you're talking about baseball and I can't understand half of the words you're using."

"Are you saying I sound like a man?" Jane teases lightly, not taking any offense.

"Of course not, I'm merely implying that I enjoy listening to the frequency of your voice, it resonates with me."

"Is that so Doctor Isles?" Jane asks, intentionally lowering her voice to accentuate the roughness in her natural accent.

Maura hums appreciatively, "You did that on purpose." She states.

"Mm mm, and what if I did?" Jane lets go and tries to look in her eyes but Maura's grip tightens like a snake being given inch of space around its prey so she puts her hands back as they were with a little, "Ooo-kay."

"Please keep talking." Maura requests quietly, a word Jane is finding herself applying to Maura more with each passing hour and she does not like it.

"Umm, okay sure, but how about we move to the couch first, can you do that Babe?" Jane brushes over Maura's hair, wondering if the warmth she feels is coming from her or Maura who does not attempt to move. Jane starts to move them herself all the while holding her, walking backwards, "I need a topic first."

"Anything, I just want to hear you." Maura follows Jane's steps, allowing herself to be guided over to the couch and then sitting down with a leg under her when they reach it, adjusting her head onto Jane's shoulder as they sit.

Jane begins to play with the ends of Maura's unevenly cut hair, picking up a curl and rubbing the strands between her fingers until they fall back onto the shoulder of their owner and she repeats the process, "I remember you once wrote a poem about me."

"Three." Maura mumbles tiredly, "But I only let Kent read out that one because I knew I could get away with that verse if I mentioned everyone."

"I still think it's very sweet."

"Noted." Maura acknowledges sleepily, "Tell me a story, something happy."

"Have I ever told you about the time I saved a little old lady and her grandson at a Red Sox game?"

"No." Maura mumbles, closing her eyes and adjusting the position of her head on Jane's shoulder.

"Okay well picture this; it's a cold day out at Fenway park with the rain coming in and there's talk of shortening the match due to the weather. We're in the bottom of the 6th innings, the bases are loaded and we're tied with the Yankees, which I'm sure by now I don't have to explain the significance of. This is way back now, González is up and it's possible that this is gonna be the last pitch so it's up to him to get this right and give us the win and oh boy does he deliver. He hits it hard and we're all watching how far it's going to go; will it be a home run? The ball keeps on coming, right towards us and now I'm thinking it's going to land in the crowd so I look behind me to see if I've got any competition on catching this thing and there's this frail little old lady sitting there with her two-year-old grandson in her lap. I look back and sure enough the ball is coming straight for them, so I stand on my chair and hope to god that I can pull this off…" Jane pauses, a proud smile on her face with the memory, "I caught it. Damn near broke my hand with the speed it was moving, but I caught it. The poor woman never even knew it was coming she was so preoccupied."

"Did you get to keep it?" Maura whispers, struggling to stay awake between listening to Jane and the entrancing motions she makes playing with her hair.

"Yes, I did. Frankie was both excited and mad as all hell when he found out. He was supposed to come with me that day but wasn't able to make it."

Jane settles into a zone, calmly meandering along with her thoughts aloud, drifting between happy stories from her childhood, baseball and work until eventually Maura stops responding and she realizes that she is now trapped on the couch in this position with her best friend using her as a pillow. She does not mind though, not really, because she wants to be there for Maura, to protect her, to hold her, provide reassurance, love, and tonight a shoulder to sleep on. She does not move, resigned to her spot on the couch and tipping her head back to gaze at the ceiling, pondering how Maura would react if she stuck glow-in-the-dark stars up there. Jane smiles, almost laughs, when she imagines how Maura would first object to the tape being stuck to the ceiling for fear it would strip the paint, and then secondarily scold her for not at least putting them in factually correct constellations let alone proper spacing and to scale with planets or other common space objects.

Yeah, that sounds like something Maura would do.

With the silence and nowhere to go it is not long before she too manages to fall asleep in the company of her best friend, both sleeping soundly for the first time in what feels like weeks. They remain like that through what little remains of the night and into the morning even as Angela comes quietly sneaking in after the run rises, placing a blanket over the pair and leaving them alone, returning to the guest house to make coffee for herself without fear of waking them up. She had hoped to be able to talk to the pair before any of them could be called off to work, but for now having sighted the two women and knowing they were getting some sleep would be enough to get her through the day. She could call in later.

Jane wakes first when the sun's rays strike her face and force her into the conscious realm. It takes her a few seconds of fighting with the constraining material wrapped around her and trying to get up to remember where she is and who is still sleeping on her shoulder before she resumes stillness. She puts her arm down on Maura's back and quietly hopes the doctor will wake soon because her body is stiff and the aches are mounting by the moment but she does not want to disturb her rest. Jane tries to distract herself with her thoughts and it occurs to her that now is the perfect time to start unpacking her thoughts and feelings regarding the woman curled into her. She thinks back on their interactions with the filter of a relationship and it occurs to her nothing really has to change between them with this development.

Our history has bonded us together. I can think of no stronger connection than the one I share with Maura; I'd kill or die for her if need be. I would do anything to protect her and I suppose, nothing would really be changing between us, we'd just be adding another layer to the relationship we already have established. A physical one. I'm not the best with that but I can adapt.

Jane looks down at Maura in her arms, idly stroking her back unconsciously.

Yeah, I don't think that'll be too hard. I'd also be afforded more opportunities to be close to keep an eye on her. I'm going to be more vigilant in keeping tabs on everyone, I need to figure out who their next target is and prevent this from escalating further.

Jane feels Maura shift against her and she looks down as much as she can, watching her return to the land of the living with confused eyes that sharpen slightly when they land on her and the position they've been in for the last four hours, "Oh, God. Jane, I'm so sorry. I fell asleep on you." she sits up quickly, pushing the blanket away and looking around the room for her bearings.

"It's okay Maura, we both needed sleep." Jane replies while taking the chance to stretch her limbs in front of her, "How do you feel?"

Maura does not answer immediately, pausing and looking remarkably like a machine running system diagnostics and analysis. Much like the basic trouble-shooters, she comes up empty, "I don't know. I'm not really sure how I should feel." there is a touch of surprise in her voice, "Phlegmatic perhaps?"

"Phlegm what now?" Jane asks with a raised eyebrow, "Isn't that to do with like…" she makes a gesture as though there is something coming out of her nose, "to do with snot?"

"Phlegm is yes, it's the thick viscous substance secreted by the mucous membranes of the respiratory passages," Maura watches Jane squirm in disgust with mild amusement, "But phlegmatic has nothing to do with nasal by-products, it is best described as an unemotional and calm disposition."

"Speak plain and to the purpose!" Jane puts on a deep voice, attempting to sound sophisticated and important.

"Oh! Shakespeare!" Maura becomes excited with Jane's demonstration of literature knowledge, ready to launch into an explanation of the original context of the quote but notices her immediate disinterest and redirects herself, answering, "Apathetic, if you will."

"You couldn't have just said numb ?"

"That would not have been nearly as fun." Maura states, smiling when Jane does, "How about you Jane?"

"I'm alright." She rubs her hands together and then scratches behind her ear, catching Maura's analysing eyes and then falling still. She tries again, "I'm tired, I guess… Worried about you, and Ma, and Frankie, and Korsak."

"I'll be okay," Maura assures, "I shouldn't need more than twenty-four hours to get things sorted and I'm confident that Kent can step in until tomorrow. I just need to see my hair dresser and -"

"Twenty-four hours?" It takes Jane a second to catch up. "Maura! You just went through hell, take a couple days off, you've got the time and no one expects you at work today- or this week for that matter. Give yourself some time, you deserve it."

"Thank you Jane. I appreciate your concern but I would rather keep busy and I would like to be back in the office tomorrow."

"I-" Jane starts to argue, but then pauses, recognising this might be a losing battle. They can both be stubborn but if there is one thing Jane understands about coping with traumatic experiences, it's diving into work and distractions. "Okay," she agrees, "Tomorrow. But we're not going anywhere near the precinct today alright?"

"We?" Maura questions, "You're not going into work? You haven't willingly taken a day off in-"

"Years. I know, I'm sure they won't let me forget it either. It won't be a problem." Jane searches for her phone holder on her hip, sliding it out and unlocking the device with practiced motions.

"I must say I'm surprised."

"Well I'm not letting you leave my sight." Jane mumbles distractedly as she types out her late request for leave to Korsak.

"Are you sure you're alright Jane? You're not usually the clingy type."

"I don't do clingy. I'm protective." Jane corrects without looking up.

"So you like to say. Hm," Maura's mind turns over to medical articles she has read, looking for reason behind Jane's behaviour, "Perhaps you're experiencing a form of separation anxiety or mild para-"

"They've already had one go at you, I don't intend to let anyone get to you again." Jane looks up her, her tone is hard and her expression fierce, displaying her passion and desire to protect those around her.

"Jane." Maura admonishes, surprised by the sudden shift in her demeanour and feeling claustrophobic at the prospect of Jane following her everywhere, "You can't be watching me for the rest of your life because-"

"It won't be for the rest of my life, just until I know you're safe."

"It's absurd!" Maura argues, "I don't need you hovering over me. I appreciate your support and concern for me but it's going to be hard for me to start to move on if I know I'm still being watched and perceive there is still a threat. I can't go about my day if I'm worrying that I'm going to be attacked, I-"

"That's why I'll be there! Or if I can't be then I'll have an officer with you-"

"No." Maura says firmly, "That doesn't make me feel safe Jane, it's the opposite, it-it makes me feel paranoid and claustrophobic. I need my space, I need things to go back to normal, and I work in a building surrounded by police officers and detectives, I can't imagine a safer place to work in these circumstances. Why can't you let me do that?" Maura asks as it dawns on her in that moment that the problem is not entirely her safety (although that does hold weight to the argument too), but Jane's own fears that she will not admit to either of them.

"Because I care about you Maura!" Jane snaps in anger and immediately regrets the way she has said it, pulling her tone back down and revealing the hurt and guilt inside that is really eating away at her, "I feel bad enough that I already let this happen to you, I won't make the same mistake again okay? I can't, I-I just can't. "

"Can't what?" Maura wants clarification.

"Can't see this happen to you again, can't see Ma get hurt. What if they go after Frankie next? Or worse, Tommy or little TJ? Oh God TJ! " Jane looks back down at the phone still in her hand, deleting her original message to Korsak and instead opting to ask if anyone has been in contact with her brother and nephew, "I hadn't even thought about him, how could I forget-"

"Jane." Maura grabs both of Jane's wrists, holding tight when she tries to tug herself free in her sudden hysteria.

"Maura! Let me go." Jane uses her self-defence training to free herself, twisting out of Maura's grasp but Maura takes hold of her again, "I need to message Korsak, I have to-"

"Stop." Maura commands firmly. Jane does. She freezes entirely in place, waiting for Maura to speak, "Tommy is fine and I don't believe this person will go after TJ, he's still a child and while he is a close relative I theorise that this person is more interested in tormenting you rather than intending to kill anyone."

"Theorise? Maura they've already killed! There are bodies lying in your morgue, that you autopsied, what do you mean you don't think they intend to kill?" She punctuates her sentence in the waving of her phone as though she bodies she spoke of where on the coffee table in front of them.

"I think that this is exactly what they want." Maura speaks calmly, hoping Jane will find it catching, "They're toying with you Jane. They are trying to hurt you by making you watch what they can do to your loved ones, taking what you hold most dear to demonstrate that they can to make you feel like you have no control. They're drawing this out to be as painful as possible. Harris could have killed me at any time but he didn't, I don't think it was part of the plan. That would have been too easy for them and most likely draw too much attention given my position, no, I believe that was a power play. Psychologically speaking it's sadistic. They're deriving pleasure, usually sexually though not necessarily in this case, in forcing you to watch others suffer, knowing you can't do anything to stop them." Maura explains.

"They could still hurt TJ without killing him," Jane argues, "I gotta warn Tommy and make sure he's somewhere safe."

"Jane they won't go after a toddler."

"How do you know? He'd be a perfect target because he can't fight back." Jane tries not to imagine the horror that could be inflicted on the boy, the damage that could be done to his growing body and impair him for life.

"Because he can't talk Jane." Maura puts simply, "He can't tell you what's happened to him and I believe, based on the evidence, that this was a very well thought out plan from the effort they've gone to in order to hide their tracks, all the way down to the clues they have left. Everything has been meticulously thought out. It's likely they have spent years planning this and-" she didn't want to say that she thinks Harris would have ended up on her table regardless of Jane's actions, that was too close to guessing but she did recognise it as a possibility. That point however did not seem as important as the next one that she was so desperately trying to get across to Jane and she opts to skip right to it. "Look at what's happening now: You're here listening to me and watching over me, blaming yourself for something you had no control over and it kills you every time I cry, I see it in your eyes. TJ can't give you that, he's too young to process any of it and they know that. They won't take him."

The words slide over Jane like ice water, her analysis of their unknown suspect makes sense to her but she does not like it one bit, "Are you saying…?" Jane stops, she does not want to finish her sentence in case she is right.

"Sometimes living can be worse than dying." Maura states in conclusion, "I have my suspicions that this may be the effect they are going for. Now a toddler can't express thought or experience so their methods wouldn't hold the same effect on an undeveloped child as it would an adult since they'd be too likely to repress the memories and bounce back. The alternative would be to kill him but it would be too simple in comparison to their previous tactics."

Jane hates the idea that person is smarter than physical threats and going after a much harder target that she can't necessarily protect, even if means her young nephew is safe. She sits there, phone still in her hand, trying to digest Maura's words but now unsure what she is supposed to do with this information, "Then what should I do?"

"Go back to work. Follow the evidence- Catch this bastard Jane, but they aren't coming back for me." Maura decides not to mention that she does not believe for a second that it is over. She expects there will be more bodies, more hidden clues, more hurt, perilous situations, tears, scars. But she holds onto the firm belief that Jane is smarter and with everyone helping her it will come to an end for nothing lasts forever. The best thing she can do now is get back to work, even if she doesn't fully believe her own words regarding her safety. The idea of being taken again terrifies her.

"And I will, believe me; I will go to work but not today. I need to make sure that you're safe and…" Jane pauses to let her thoughts catch up with her words but resorts to bargaining instead, "Tonight I'll go back to my place if you let me stay with you today. Alright?"

Maura thinks it over for a second, "Alright." she agrees with a single nod.

Jane sighs in relief, dropping her shoulder's down that she'd not realised she had been keeping so tense, "Thank you," she leans and kisses Maura cheek before returning to the text she had been trying to draft. Erasing her message again, Jane starts from scratch to sound less panicked and ensure she gets across all the points the conversation has racked up.

Leave for the day, protection detail to stay on Maura, potential need for protective custody for Tommy and TJ-

With Jane's attention focused on her phone and the list of people she needs to make sure cannot be touched, she doesn't get to see the analytical look on Maura's face. Maura turns over everything she has just said to Jane, trying using it to bolster her own confidence and reassure herself that she is safe now. She did not lie, she doesn't want a crew of people following her everywhere she goes, implying there is still a threat to her life, she wants to move on from that, but nonetheless the fear does remain present.

"I need things to be as normal as they can." Maura admits quietly, almost talking to herself as she stares off into space with her own thoughts, "I trust you implicitly and I know you will go above and beyond to ensure the safety of everyone, but in doing so you'll inevitably neglect yourself." She looks up at Jane now, consciously blinking and talking directly to her this time, "I need you to promise me that you'll look out for yourself, please don't take any unnecessary risks."

"I promise I'll do my best." Jane responds sincerely, but her chosen words are calculated to avoiding promising saving her life over another's.

"No." Maura says firmly, reaching for Jane's hand to express the importance of this to her, "We're in this together now. I need you to promise me that the next time you're in a life-threatening situation you will think about me- you want to protect me Jane?" The detective nods immediately, about to add her verbal confirmation, "Then protect yourself. Next time you're going to be a hero, think about those you're leaving behind if you fail. You are so incredibly brave Jane, and selfless, it's one of the things I love about you but unfortunately I don't share that quality to quite the same extent as you; I'm selfish and I don't want you to be the next body on my table."

"I-" Jane's words stop before her jaw does, she cannot find words or even thoughts to start composing a response.

"Please, Jane." Maura grips her hand tightly, "Promise me you'll stop running towards danger?"

"Maura…" Jane drops eye contact, "I don't know if I can do that. I understand that this is very important to you but… I made a promise to the people of this city that I would protect and serve, and if need be to die for its' citizens. You said it yourself that it's not in my nature to look the other way, I-" she stops herself before saying she doesn't know how Maura can ask that of her, and takes a stalling breath, then resumes eye contact, "It's part of my job, but I promise that in future I will think of you and be careful. I'll do everything I can to make sure I come home at the end of the day."

A compromise. One of many I'm sure.

Maura releases a shuddering breath, nodding in acknowledgement and realising that this is the best she's going to get from Jane, "Do you remember when you jumped off a bridge to save that prosecutor, Paul Wescourt?"

"Yeesss, it was the most terrifying moment of my life, I'll never forget it."

"You remember how I became distant because I was angry at you?"

"Yes, you didn't talk to me for almost a week, I had to chase you down to get you to even look at me."

"I was terrified Jane," Maura starts to explain, "because I caught a glimpse of what it would be like to lose you and it's true what they say; you don't know how important something is until you lose it. I thought I'd lost you and it occurred to me then how deeply I care about you and it terrified me. It still does if I'm being honest."

Jane tries to think back how long that had been, how long Maura had been harbouring her feelings in secret, slowly killing herself with the knowledge she could not share. She's seen first-hand the effect holding such a burden has had on Maura in the past and hates to speculate what it might have done to her now, "Maura that was almost a year ago! You mean to say you've known all this time and never said anything?" Maura nods. "Why didn't you say something?"

"I couldn't. I had gotten you back despite the odds but then the only thing more terrifying than you deceased, would be for you to find out and hate me for it. I couldn't risk losing your friendship just because you didn't reciprocate the feelings I had just discovered."

Jane chewed on her bottom lip, knowing this is where she's supposed to say that she does reciprocate and reassure Maura that everything would have, and will be, okay, but she can't lie about this, "I really hadn't thought about it much." She answers honestly.

"But you did think about it?" Maura asks for clarification, drawing her knees up to her chest and winding her arms around them.

"Yeah, doesn't everyone think like that about their friends occasionally?"

"I don't think so."

"I just… didn't want to question what we had, it was a little too much to think about, you know? That line of thinking came with a lot of questions and it was easier and safer to shut them down before they gained any traction."

"Is it still too overwhelming for you?" Maura asks, not bothering to hide the concern laced in her voice.

"Not entirely, no, now that I know your big secret," Jane teases, "and have… accepted my own reactions. It's surprising more than anything. Yesterday morning I woke up worried I was going to be responsible for the death of the Chief Medical Examiner of Massachusetts and my best friend but now I stand to lose my- partner? Is that the right word? Girlfriend?" she questions, looking for other words she might be able to use in reference to Maura.

Maura shrugs, "Whichever word you like. I prefer 'partner'; it sounds more professional and mature."

Jane nods, "Partner. Yeah that sounds okay. It might take a couple of days for that to really sink in."

Maura understands, she's had a year to think and reflect on the nature of their relationship, it was only natural that Jane needed some time to sort herself out and get on the same page. "I loved you as a friend first, then somewhere along the way it became more and it took losing you to realise how much I needed you, but I knew you wouldn't understand."

"I understand now." Jane responds with an emphasis implying the last twenty-four hours have been her version of Maura's awakening.

"And for that I'm grateful, even if you can't say you love me."

"I do love you," Jane rebuts, "You're family. You've been family for a long time, just ask Ma."

"That's not quite what I mean."

"I know." Jane admits, "I'm sorry, I have some catching up to do but I'll get there. A lot's happened in the last couple days."

"Are you sure?"

"About us?" Maura nods, "One way to find out."

Maura tilts her head in thought, trying to understand where Jane is going, "What's that?"

"Kiss me again." Jane demands gently, watching as Maura freezes in response and does not move a muscle, not even to draw in air, "Breathe, Maura," she whispers, rolling up onto her knees and leaning over her. She waits till Maura finishes her inhale before slowly leaning in, giving her time to complete another respiration cycle before she closes the distance between them and kisses her, holding her chin up with two fingers. Jane is gentle and slow, taking stock of the little shiver that ripples through her at the contact, confirming that even though she has not yet thought through it all, this is indeed right and she cannot argue with the results.

Maura relaxes under her lips, uncoiling her body and meeting Jane halfway, rising up on her knees to join her, tilting her head of her own accord. She slides her palms along the detective's jaw and Jane accommodates her movements, moving her own body back so they can be closer and upright together, her hands falling to Maura's hips as they kiss.

Jane nips at Maura's bottom lip, pulling on it for a second before separating and resting their foreheads together. She practically purrs predatorily on her next breath for Maura's benefit, teasing her, "That was exquisite."

"I concur." Maura breathes her agreement, no longer doubting Jane's interest in her and noting with surprise how quickly she seems to have adjusted to the idea of them even if her words say otherwise, "You catch up quick."

"You made me run a marathon; I think I can keep up."

"Is that so?" Maura quirks an eyebrow.

"Maura, no, that was not a challenge! Oh God what have I got myself into." Jane rubs her face in mock exasperation and sits back.

Maura grins, and finally, laughs. She enjoys the light feeling it gives her body and the way it makes Jane smile in return.

Perhaps, Maura wonders, it is not just time that heals all wounds, but love too. It's a start.


AN2: For now this is the end, although I have been thinking about this a lot and trying to see if I can make something more out of it.
Sept 2018 Edit: Wow you guys, I hadn't expected this to get so much attention or take off like this, thank you so much for all your kind words! I've had a lot of requests for more of this or other Rizzles stories so I have a couple ideas in the works but I don't want to make any promises just yet... That said, you're very pursuasive with the almost weekly/daily reviews asking for more!

Thank you kbprincess3 for pointing out that this chapter ended up as a double of chapter 2,.