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"Can I ask you a question?" Clarke asked and watched as Lexa stopped chewing for a moment.

They were sitting under the bleachers next to the soccer field again, enjoying their lunch break together. The girls' night had gone well, even better after Lexa had admitted she'd like to move in with Raven. Clarke and her friends had emptied a few more beers, Lexa had sipped her coke and after the heavy conversation, their night had been filled with much lighter conversations about their favorite holiday destinations or whether Pizza Hawaii was a blessing or a curse. Throughout the night, Clarke had kept studying Lexa whenever she thought no one was watching, making sure she was okay, or just, well, to look at the girl that she had been crushing on for weeks now, but even five beers in, Raven had been much more attentive than Clarke had assumed.

"Okay." Lexa agreed and slowly continued eating.

"Two, actually," Clarke stated. For a while now, she had thought about asking Lexa about these things. However, she had never been too sure whether Lexa would be okay with it, but now she had the feeling the brunette trusted her enough. "What were you doing all alone in the park that one night?"

Lexa took a moment to finish chewing her salad. "My roommate and her friends pre–gamed in our room and they usually make fun of my eating habits, and that night they kept teasing me about eating only the green and red Skittles, so I stopped eating and um…" she stopped and started fiddling with her bracelet. Clarke waited patiently, knowing better than to push Lexa when she finally opened up about her roommate. A few long moments later, the brunette cleared her throat. "When I'm nervous, I start rocking back and forth, to… you know…"

"Stimming." Clarke mumbled and Lexa looked at her with big eyes. The blonde felt a blush creeping up her cheeks, and she nervously scratched her knee, "I might have done some… research."

Lexa blinked, once, twice, opened her mouth and closed it again and Clarke instantly panicked, hoping she hadn't overwhelmed or offended the girl. "Sorry, I… was that wrong?"

Lexa quickly shook her head, surprise evident in her eyes. "No! No it is not– it wasn't wrong. I just… people never take the time or effort to um… do research. I don't blame them. Why should they, anyway."

Clarke sighed and moved a little closer to the girl. "Hey… you're important to me, so I want to know and learn about it. You mean so much to me and I just want to…understand, I guess. Would you like to continue?" She asked carefully. Lexa's fiddling slightly intensified but eventually, she nodded.

"So I tried to keep it subtle but they noticed of course, and kept… saying mean things. They also thought it was funny to lock the door, I think, and then I panicked. Luckily Anya called in that moment and I somehow managed to answer the call and she immediately picked up on what was happening and somehow calmed me down, at least a bit, and she…" Lexa paused for a second to get her breathing back under control, and Clarke watched carefully, ready to jump in and save Lexa from having yet another panic attack, but the brunette seemed to have control over her body so far, and she continued, "I didn't hear what she said to my roommate and her friends, I was still in a state where I don't really notice my surroundings, and the next thing I know is that they were gone and the door was open, and Anya told me to leave the room and go somewhere quiet so that we could talk alone, and that's when I went to the park." Her lips curled up into a tiny smile. "You found me about ten minutes after Anya and I hung up."

Clarke nodded understandingly but stayed quiet, giving Lexa some time to process. She was (for more than one reason) glad that their Advanced Math class was cancelled, because she was sure that Lexa was in no state to focus on something like that right now.

They silently watched two birds fighting over a tomato slice in front of them, until Lexa spoke again. "You said you had two questions."

"Yeah, actually," Clarke said softly, "but it's similar to my first question." She carefully watched the girl's body language to make sure she hadn't overstepped any boundaries yet, but Lexa seemed to remain calm. "That's okay."

Clarke nodded. "Okay. Uh… so there was this Monday where you didn't show up the entire day, do you remember?" Clarke carefully approached the topic and was positively surprised when Lexa's cheeks twitched into a smile when she nodded. "Where have you been?"

With her eyes trained on the bracelet that she was still fumbling with, Lexa spoke, "I was with Anya." Clarke had never felt such a strong relief rush through her entire body, she was sure. "On that Saturday when I was at your apartment, I later received a text from an unknown number with some really bad words." Lexa frowned.

"Nothing else, just those swear words. I panicked and sent the screenshot to Anya and she came to pick me up. She um… she really knows me well. I needed a familiar surrounding with people I feel safe with. She wanted to send me back to classes but I convinced her to let me stay with her on Monday, too. That's why I didn't show up."

Clarke had been listening to Lexa and couldn't help but smile as well when Lexa's smile reappeared at mentioning Anya. She was proud of her shy girl for opening up so much, but there was one thing that bothered her.

"Lex?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I see that message?"

Lexa shifted uncomfortably but pulled out her phone, opened the message and turned her phone so Clarke could read it. The blonde furrowed her brows and switched on her own phone, a dark idea clouding her mind, and she was praying to the Gods that she was wrong. She clicked on the contact and held her phone next to Lexa's to compare the numbers, and released a long sigh when her fear was confirmed. "That bastard." She mumbled and Lexa eyed her phone anxiously. "That's Finn's number. Lexa I… I'm so sorry. He… this is…" Clarke helplessly gestured between their phones, not able to phrase her thoughts. She was furious. She wanted to break jaws, and she wanted to break them now.

She squeezed her eyes shut and took a moment to regain control over her body. Inhale… exhale… inhale… ex– her eyes shot open when she felt a warm hand on her thigh.

"It's okay, Clarke. Please calm down." Lexa said softly.

"Are you calming me down right now?" Clarke almost laughed at the thought that Lexa, the girl who really had every reason to freak out or stumble from one panic attack into the next about this text message, was saving her from having a panic attack herself. Lexa smiled and shrugged, not removing her hand from Clarke's leg for several minutes.

"Clarke?"

"Hm?"

"Does Finn have a sister?"

Clarke furrowed her brows. "Yeah, why?"

Lexa cleared her throat and Clarke could feel her hand slightly squeezing her leg but was sure that Lexa herself had no idea that it was happening. "Is her name Charlotte?"

The blonde's pulse quickened, because yes. That was her name. "How do you know this?"

Lexa shook her head and withdrew her hand to fiddle with her bracelet again. "She's my roommate."