Chapter 4: Decide

After giving other yukes information about the Crystal of Air to pass along, Amidatty brought them over to his home. There were a lot of miscellany scattered around; much of it seemed like junk to Leon. There was a packed bookshelf, with stacks of books were scattered elsewhere. On a large table, there was currently a collection of shells spread out for some project. Amidatty moved some metal device out of a chair before inviting them to sit at the table while he placed the shells away in various bins.

"I've just been doing a study into the various magical properties of shells, since the shell varieties and locations can make differences in said properties," Amidatty explained. "Are you two doing anything besides serving the crystals?"

"Yes, Leon is going to take the trial of the paladin," Hurdy said, leading them to explaining what their plan was. Amidatty was interested in it and asked several questions.

They had questions for him too. "What can you tell us about ourselves?" Leon asked when a good chance seemed to come. "We have to start anew, but having been tormented who knows how long without knowing anything, we're trying to figure out something of ourselves."

Amidatty put his gloved hand on the long beak of his helm. "That would be something to learn about. Unfortunately, I've been serving in Shella's caravan a long time. That tends to make one forgetful, you see."

"The chalices and the myrrh both sap away memories," Hurdy said, his gaze drifting off like he was thinking now.

On seeing that, Amidatty patted Hurdy's arm and made him pay attention again. "But that's done now. Now, about you both, I remember the Black Knight as stories of seemingly different people. And I do remember that our caravan once came across the Black Knight, to our misfortune. Two of our fellows were badly injured from the encounter and had to stay in the wagon when we went to grab the third drop of myrrh for the year. We even altered where we meant to go with fewer members able to fight."

Hearing that made Leon feel a knot in his stomach. He remembered a haze from when he'd last been chasing the light, with faint shadows like other people might be there but not recognized. "Did I kill anyone?" he asked, lowering his eyes. "It's fine if you're honest; I'd rather know."

Amidatty looked over him a moment, then nodded. "Yes, some people died as a result of coming across you at a bad time."

"I was chasing an image of one of the memory eaters, a light that constantly eluded me," Leon said, looking back over at him. "I fought until I collapsed of exhaustion, then it took what few memories I had so I was hollow again when I woke up. I didn't know my name until Gurdy told me who I was."

"That does match what I recall of that incident," Amidatty said. "It's fine, Leon, I understood even then that there was little you could do about your condition. You didn't notice any of us and were fighting something that we could not see. Actually, the ones who got injured were trying to stop you because you were acting so delirious. We thought that perhaps if you could be stopped, something might be done so you weren't so reckless. But I suppose it was reckless for us to try approaching a lilty knight in heavy armor that still brandished his sword like it was a mere stick."

"You still tried to help, which is admirable," he said.

Amidatty shrugged at that. "Most people say I'm odd for being that way. But for the other story of the Black Knight, that goes back years to when I was a novice caravanner. Back then, the Black Knight was known as the leader of the Alfitaria caravan. He was spoken of all across the mainland as a living legend, a knight who was a master swordsman that easily defeated even the myrrh tree guardians. It was unusual enough for a lilty to use a sword in battle; most use spears to make up for their short height."

"Spears are the practical choice, but you really test your bravery with wielding a sword," Leon said, finding the words familiar.

"It's funny then that clavats are the ones who use swords even though they're usually the most gentle and peaceful race," Amidatty said. "Now if I ran across the Black Knight in those days, I wouldn't be sure of it; I don't remember those days well. But when I think of the difference when another brings it up, I recall thinking that for all his skill, he didn't think much of his accomplishments. He said that the whole being a living legend thing was an exaggeration. But maybe you did want to live up to that since you went off with Hurdy."

Worried about him, Leon glanced over at Hurdy. But he seemed to be paying attention now. "But if others thought of him in that way, there must have been something great he was doing."

Amidatty nodded. "True, and you acted the same way when people addressed you as a priest. You'd say that you weren't old enough and still had more to study. But I remember more clearly because you lived here for a few years: you acted very much like a priest, always a calm light encouraging others. You studied and communed with the crystal here daily. Sometimes you approached others with a message from the crystal, and you'd always turn out to be right then."

"That would be the crystal being right since I was just a messenger," Hurdy said.

"But a priest is a messenger for beings like the Great Crystal," Leon said.

"Perhaps, but..." he was looking away again, gripping the sides of his chair,

"I did travel with you and your brother Gurdy fairly often in the last few years," Amidatty said, making Leon wonder if his mind was wandering. Then he noticed Hurdy looking at the yuke again. Maybe not a wandering mind on Amidatty's part, but keeping Hurdy from getting upset and leaving them with Gurdy instead. "Gurdy made a number of the other caravans angry with him, but I always enjoyed speaking with you both."

As evening fell, Hurdy wanted to get some extra rest and someone called Amidatty off to look at something. Leon took the Path of the Paladin book and attempted to read through it. Hurdy had mentioned that he should at least study the early chapters on what was expected of one. Barely a page into the book, though, Leon wondered if studying this would be more challenging than taking the trial itself. The words and the way they were written made his brain feel like mush another page on. He put the book back in Hurdy's bag and looked around the house for something else he could do. Maybe go outside and train since he could focus his mind now.

He found a balcony on the upper level of Amidatty's house and decided to step out there. The sun was down now, leading to most of the sky being dark. In view to the west, there was a large forest running up into the mountains. Some of the structures that diverted the mountain waters to Veo lu Sluice could be seen from here. The balcony itself had some boxes stacked around a large barrel. Because of that, Leon could get up on the barrel to sit and think.

Before long, Amidatty came onto the balcony. "Ah, here you are," the yuke said. "Nice view up here, isn't there? It's one of the reasons I wanted to own this house."

"It is nice," Leon said. "What were you called out for?"

Amidatty chuckled. "Oh that? The bridge that leads into town is usually dismissed at the end of the day, for our safety and seclusion. It couldn't be dismissed tonight. The guardsman called several of us to try. When I heard that was the issue, I went back to the crystal and asked it about the bridge. And it replied that it did not want access to itself restricted, so it made the bridge permanent."

"So people wouldn't need the mark now to get the bridge raised," Leon said.

"I think it's a good thing," he said, leaning on the railing to look out at the forest. "The older folks who rarely leave town are aghast, but I think we could benefit from allowing more people into Shella. After all, that's how I initially met Hurdy."

"It does sound better," he said, looking up at the sky.

They were quiet a little while, with the sounds of the village and the forest in the background. Then Amidatty glanced over at him. "Actually, there is something about what you're doing that puzzles me. I've read the Path of the Paladin book before, out of curiosity, and something doesn't add up. It might be something I've forgotten, and yet I'm not sure."

"How could you read that out of curiosity?" Leon said, looking back at him. "I just tried to start it and could not get far because the sentences were so convoluted. There were words I had no idea what they meant as well. Why would they write it that way when the people who want the information are like me and not scholars?"

"It is an old book, written in a style even older," Amidatty explained. "Although I must agree, it's not that helpful to the most likely potential paladins. Hurdy might be able to help with that."

"He's been telling me a lengthy legend about a dark knight who became a paladin." Leon shrugged at that. "Gurdy picked up when he appeared, but he has different priorities with story-telling, like giving assessments on how hot some of the women must have been."

"That doesn't surprise me. But what did surprise me was the plan to take someone with you into the trial at Mount Vellenge." Amidatty tapped the beak of his helm. "I don't remember ever hearing of that requirement. It's not unusual for the paladin candidate to have traveling companions, but they're not necessary."

Having someone to protect might not be necessary? Leon bit his lip; had Hurdy lied to him? But he didn't seem the sort to lie, not like Gurdy. Then again, they were the same person, possibly in a situation they couldn't help. "He brought it up but didn't think he was worthwhile for a role like that," he said. "It'd be a strange thing to make up."

"That's true, but Hurdy and Gurdy don't think the way most people do," Amidatty said. "It may be a result of two halves of one person trying to work through things. That means you need to be cautious with them. One is a known liar and the other is an idealist; they could mislead you and might not recognize or care that they are. They are good with magic, but given that stress can make them shift personality, they're not reliable in battle either. Even if you were to take someone to protect, it won't be hard to find someone less troublesome to travel with. You don't even need to go to the desert since the crystal you own already has the holy element."

"Do you want me to just abandon him?" Leon asked, concerned about what Amidatty was doing. He treated them as friends, so why do this?

"Not necessarily," Amidatty said. "Believe me, I don't want to see them abandoned somewhere in the world yet again. They should be with someone willing to support them, hopefully so they can sort things out. But I think you should consider if you want to be that person. I'm sure you have your own searching to do for yourself. If you would rather work on yourself first, then I'd be fine with convincing Hurdy and Gurdy to stay here in Shella again. I do consider them friends and would like to help them as much as I can."

If Leon wanted to, Hurdy and Gurdy would be fine left here in Shella with Amidatty. It might be better to do so since Amidatty already knew how to handle them. "I see. I'll give it some thought."

"That's good." He tapped his helm, then nodded to some thought. "I suppose I'll leave you to that tonight. Meanwhile, I think I'll find my copy of that book and see if I can't distill its teachings into something modern and easier to handle for you. I'll send you a letter in the future about that."

"That would help, thank you," Leon said.

Amidatty waved to him as he turned to leave. "Although, you've calmed down greatly already. That's wonderful."

Leon nodded. "The one who had me on edge is dead; I'm starting to accept that. And getting some good sleep and meals has helped greatly."

"In that case, I feel like you should be fine going forward," he said. "Good night Leon."

"Good night Amidatty, and thanks for your advice."

Did he want to take Hurdy and Gurdy along? Their contributions were knowing how to activate the holy spring in Lynari Desert and understanding the old book. If Leon went to Vellenge on his own, he didn't need to visit the desert and Amidatty could simplify the book for him. They were good with magic, which could help in a battle. But then, he could surely find someone else good with battle magic with a more stable mind. There would be experienced caravanners in every town that could help him there.

What did they get out of this quest? That was something to consider too. A paladin wasn't a mage-friendly class. And, Mount Vellenge had to be the place where they lost their memories. They might not remember, but they might remember unconsciously. Who knew what that would do to them? They should both not want to go there; Leon felt that going there to prove his courage was worth it. But what about Hurdy? Gurdy might not care, but Hurdy would and would definitely freak out. That could explain why he was trying to find someone else to go with Leon.

However, he had said there were several suggestions for taking a paladin trial and said this plan was the best. Perhaps one of them wanted to go to Mount Vellenge. They might not qualify for becoming a paladin, but they might find some benefit to going. Unlike him, it could be difficult for them to get to Mount Vellenge on their own. They could find someone else to help them too. But Hurdy needed someone patient with him and tolerant of Gurdy, which could be harder to find than a good magic user. And there was some merit to the idea of bringing along someone who needed protection. Those two were someone who needed protection to traverse Vellenge. So it worked out for Leon to take them along.

The next morning, Leon got up early and headed back to the stable to check on the wagon and the papaopamus. Hurdy had said that there were supplies for one person and the papaopamus for a month. That did seem accurate, although Leon could think of a few other things that would be handy to keep around. Not necessary, though. Shella was enough out of the normal way that the shops here might not have what he was thinking of. Alfitaria should have them, but… so would Marr's Pass and Leon was fairly certain that the road to Tipa headed right through that town. It would be good to pick up some fresh food at Fum before heading out to Rebena and Vellenge too.

The sky cleared up as the sun rose higher; it probably wouldn't rain today. When he finished the preparations, he headed back to Amidatty's house to find Hurdy or Gurdy, whoever he'd woken up as today. He wasn't there, but Leon found him before long in front of the Crystal of Air. He was wearing his white clerical coat, so it was probably Hurdy awake now. As he seemed attentive to the crystal, Leon came up to his side and waited. Something felt familiar about this, like they'd met up like this before.

It still felt eerily familiar as Hurdy tilted his head, then noticed him. "Oh, I'm sorry, I was listening to the crystal," he said, then looked at him a moment. "Huh, it's like we've done this before."

"That's what I was thinking," Leon said, then smiled up at him. "Don't worry about it; it's in the past. I was thinking of heading out soon, see if we couldn't reach Tipa by evening."

"We should be able to, I think," he said. "Are you sure you want me to come along with you, though? I'm afraid I might end up causing you trouble." He glanced aside, ashamed of himself. "I mean, we should be able to remember things now, but there's still gaps in the past week that I simply can't remember, and apparently I'm sleepwalking in the middle of the day. And I feel like, this is familiar, so it's going to all end in disaster again."

Leon patted Hurdy's arm, hoping to reassure him. "Well you have to go since I can't do whatever you did with this crystal yesterday. The town crystals want resettling, so you should do at least that."

"Oh, right, that's true," he said, looking up into the crystal. "The myrrh trees are wilting as they're no longer needed. We'll be the last crystal caravan."

"It's what the world needs to be done," Leon said. "Of the major towns we know of, we can head down to Marr's Pass and Tipa today to check on them, then sail down to Leuda, and back up to the Fields of Fum. You can decide what you want to do then."

"Sure, that sounds good," Hurdy said, smiling again. He didn't seem completely confidant, but it was a good start. "But what about you and your quest to Mount Vellenge?"

"That can happen after the crystals are taken care of," he said. "Although, I would like for you to accompany me there, if you want. It could be a bad time for both of us, but we'll have to confront these forgotten things to find a better future. But it is something you should decide you want to do for yourself as well."

He looked troubled at that, but it wasn't like yesterday yet. "I'll think about that," he said.

Amidatty saw them off a few minutes later, saying again that he'd read the book and send a letter about it later on. And when they reached the former miasma stream, the land was more solid. The rainbow of memory flowers was beautiful too.


The wagon had a steady rumble to it, matching the low footsteps of the papaopamus. Hurdy found himself telling a long story as the countryside passed on by. As the clouds from yesterday thinned out to reveal a blue sky unmarred by miasma, he was feeling great today. This central area of the land was mountainous, leading to a half-mile long rocky tunnel to continue the road. Torches kept it well-lit; signs noted that the guards of Marr's Pass kept this tunnel free of monsters.

Once through the tunnel, they were right in Marr's Pass. The smell of hard-working smoke filled the air from the various smithies, accompanied by clangs and chatter. Paths led off from the main road, with signs showing that they were for residents. Near a curve to the west, there was a group of children playing. They hurried off the road ahead of them; the lilty kids bounced around and talked excitedly, while the clavat kids waved and grinned. "I wonder if travelers will become more common, so wagons won't be as exciting for them."

Leon smiled at that. "I don't know, maybe not. They should have seen many from caravan season, but they're still excited over ours."

Once they made the turn, they could see a crowd in front of the crystal. It was a crowd of lilites and clavats, with a single selkie among them. There was another wagon on the road from the west. Because of that, Leon pulled the wagon over to the left in case the other wagon was headed north through the tunnel. As Hurdy hopped off the wagon seat, one of the crowd said, "We just don't understand why."

"Well it's the crystal's request," the selkie said. "I'm headed home, though, so obviously it doesn't want to go with me."

"Excuse me," Hurdy called, passing through the crowd. "We just arrived here, but I can guess that this crystal is asking to go somewhere else?"

The selkie woman smiled at him. "Oh, hello! Yes, that's all it's saying."

"But why would it want to leave us?" a clavat woman asked, putting her hand to her chin in worry. "We've taken good care of it all these years, as it's taken care of us."

"Right," a lilty woman said. "What happens if the miasma comes back? We'd all be ruined if it leaves us now."

The selkie shook her head. "It won't be back. I killed the source of it."

"Are you Tsu Fai then?" Hurdy asked. "I'm sorry, my mind's a bit foggy. I'm Hurdy and I've been traveling with Leon over there. We heard about that from the other crystals we've spoken to."

She nodded. "Yes, that's me. I've heard a lot about you from Gurdy; you're a priest who could understand the crystals while the miasma existed."

"I'm not a priest, but I do understand them," he said.

"Well could you convince the crystal not to leave?" the lilty woman asked.

Hurdy rubbed his head. "Well, I doubt it will work. They have a plan and are very firm about it." He went up the altar and looked up at the crystal. "You've heard them; what do you say?"

I must go to the Fields of Fum; tell them that's how we must heal the world.

He nodded and turned back to the crowd. "Sorry, it needs to go across the river. They're combining with each other to consolidate their powers so that they can heal the world from what the miasma did to everyone and everything. At the beginning of the time, they were one whole being, the Crystal of Life. It is the life and soul of the world. Thus, it knows best how to revive the world. It must leave this town and when it is at its new home, it will work with the Crystal of Air in Shella to keep the miasma from returning."

"How can we believe you?" a lilty man challenged him, putting a hand to a spear he carried. "We can't lose this crystal!"

"But it's the crystal's will," Hurdy said, partly afraid this would turn violent. But he was mostly angered that they wouldn't listen to the crystal.

Then Leon came up behind the lilty with the spear, grabbing his shoulder. He was wearing his large sword on his back, a clear sign that he wasn't someone to mess with. "I heard the crystal too," he said. "They have decided their course. This one has decided that it's safe to leave here. Are you going to argue with the guardian of your town?"

"You all could be scamming us," the man said, although he started to take his hand away from the spear.

Hurdy glanced back to the crystal. "You can prove yourself, can't you? You must leave with us to restore the world."

Agreeing with him, the crystal flashed with a golden light. The ground around them shook briefly. It wasn't enough to do much damage, but the animals bellowed and everyone noticed. With that done, the crystal shrank down and floated over to his side.

Taking it, he told the crowd, "See? This is their decision. They're not doing this to abandon you. Rather, their responsibility is to the whole world."

"But," the man said, shocked at the quake.

"It must be the crystal's will," the clavat woman talking with them said. She bowed her head. "We're sorry for misunderstanding. It was too strange to think of the crystal leaving us."

The crowd seemed apologetic as they scattered. "Are you the Black Knight?" Tsu Fai asked. "Your weapon seems familiar."

Leon bowed to her. "Yes, and thank you for defeating Raem. We weren't able to reclaim our memories, but now they're not being continually eaten."

"It's good that you're free, at least," she said. "I heard the crystal too; it's good that it's going with you, since I'm headed back home to Tipa."

"Actually, we're headed to Tipa as well," Leon said. "One of the crystals wants to go there."

Tsu Fai smiled. "I can take the lead if you like." Then she glanced back at her wagon, serious. "Although, do you happen to know anything about healing selkies, Hurdy? The doctor here had no idea what to do with him."

After a moment of thought, Hurdy nodded. "Yes, I've studied up on the old schools of magic in white and black, so I might be able to do something. What's happened to your friend?"

"You might want to see for yourself," she said, waving him over to her wagon.

"You go on ahead," Leon said, checking up on their own wagon. The group of kids was now nearby, looking over it. "I might need to make sure these kids aren't troublemakers."

Inside of Tsu Fai's wagon, there was a blue-haired man sitting on the floor, his knees close to his chest. He didn't appear to notice them climbing in at all. Instead, he was gazing into a small glowing crystal attached to a wooden bracelet. The pearlescent color of it was clearly that of the holy element. When Hurdy crouched by his side, he noticed that the selkie also had odd patches of hardened skin. Scars? But no… they looked almost like scales.

"It's almost a transformation," Hurdy said, gently touching one of the patches on his arm. There was a smoothness and warmth of skin, then the firmness of a scale that wouldn't give way to light pressure.

"This is De Nam," Tsu Fai said, sitting on a bench seat nearby. "He went to Conall Curach on his own to see if people could adapt to living in the miasma. He said it was like building up a resistance to poison by consuming small amounts of it."

"Such training is dangerous to attempt," he said, trying to get a good look into his eyes. The irises of his eyes were blue-green, except at the edges where they seemed pink. "How was he doing this?"

"By going in and out of his crystal's sphere of protection," she explained. "And a few months back, he told me he was drinking miasma-tainted water since he'd hit some limit of endurance. His letters became increasingly incoherent and messy after that, so I hunted him down once I took care of Raem."

He cast his scanning magic to figure out how his body was doing internally. It seemed to be working properly, but he felt the haze of miasma within De Nam. Especially with his brain; his mental activity seemed almost feral, calm solely because of what he was focusing on. But around his hands, there was a glow of the holy magic within. It was trying to make progress there. What exactly was it doing to him?

...hate the whole world stop the noise stop the living kill them all hate yourself…

His blood went cold all through his body; the words made his thoughts freeze in terror. Hurdy stumbled back, just barely catching himself from landing on his back. Tsu Fai was quickly near him, worried about both of them now. "Hurdy?"

"S-sorry," he said, removing his hat and putting a hand to his forehead trying to clear the voice out. "The miasma is still in his body. Its voice is sadistic and dark. Although, I don't know if he can hear it exactly." He moved to sit on his knees instead. "You've been to Mount Vellenge; is this your crystal?"

She nodded. "He snatched it from me as soon as he could and has been like this ever since. I can get him to drink spring water if I put the container in his hand, but he hasn't eaten much yet."

"I think this crystal is trying to purify him," Hurdy said, opening his bag to get one of the larger crystals out. The one from here in Marr's Pass was easiest to get. "Is that right?"

Yes, he should keep that fragment always until the miasma is fully purged from him. Bring him to the Crystal in Tipa when you go to fuse it with the one from Tida; that will help speed things along. It will be able to tell him when he can let go of the fragment. Even while he's unresponsive like this, he should continue to take care of his necessities as long as some food and water are nearby.

"What's it saying now?" Tsu Fai asked, looking at the Marr's Pass crystal in Hurdy's hands. "All I can hear now is something like bells."

"One has to be able to listen past the bells in order to understand the crystals fully," he said. "But it confirmed that your crystal is purifying him. He needs to wear that bracelet at all times now so it can continue its work. Right now, he isn't thinking much above an animalistic level. I think consuming the miasma water much longer would have eventually turned him into a monster; that's why these scales were trying to form."

"They were worse looking when I found him," she said.

"It's going to take some time for him to recover since it got in his body and mind," Hurdy said. "But as I said, let the crystal do its work and keep good water and food where he can take it when he wants. When we get to Tipa, I have some business with the crystal there; I'll bring him with me and it will do what it can to help, including telling you both when the miasma is gone and he can let go of this crystal fragment."

Tsu Fai nodded. "I see. It seems everyone needs time to recover. In that case, let's head on to Tipa."

When he got back to his wagon, Leon was still talking with the kids. He did wave them off once he saw him. "Sorry, but we've got to be heading on. And you two keep practicing; I'm sure there will still be a need for those who can protect others."

"Thanks, sir!" one of the boys said, before he and his friends ran off. They didn't go far since they still wanted to watch them leave.

"What were you talking with them about?" Hurdy asked as they got onto the driver's bench.

"They were asking all kinds of questions, including if we'd run into the Black Knight," Leon said.

"What did you say about that?" Hurdy asked, worried that it may have upset him.

Fortunately, he smiled at that. "I told them that I was the Black Knight. I don't know if they believed me, but they all squealed and had even more questions. Like if I would really come after kids who were out too late. I said that I was getting out of that work to become a paladin, but they should still behave themselves." Leon then waved over to Tsu Fai, letting her know they were ready to go. "Is her friend going to be okay?"

"In time," Hurdy said. "They already had the means to cure him, which was good." As they headed out of town, he started back up with Cecil's story. There was a lot more to get through with him.