I take in the appearance of the magical orb with aloof analysis, noting that it is smaller than normal Materia, barely the size of a marble, and emitting a pale pink sheen as darker magenta bolts flicker within the deep, condensed purple of the center. The way the colors shift and swirl is reminiscent of the more volatile Summons, but the fact of its evident capacity to remain operational without being equipped in some fashion is not one I have encountered.
"That is Independent Materia, not Command, but I don't recognize it," I apprise objectively, my eyes fixated on the tiny globe with an inner compulsion I can now differentiate from natural impulse. "A personal design of your own?"
"It is. A modification of a Chocobo Lure, actually. I have been interested in the properties of that Materia for quite a while, how it is able to attract a specific type of creature to the exclusion of others. Not many give the ability much thought, but it seems to be rare, possibly entirely unique, among all Materia," he explains banally, his voice having regained his customary pleasant timbre and cadence.
I flatly reply, "Fascinating. How does it function without an outside energy source?"
"Now that is something I am curious about, myself. It appears to be a side effect of Materia compression, but has only shown up in those of a more… subtle, weaker nature, and I suspect, given enough use, it will stop working altogether. A temporary, self-powered Materia, so to speak."
"I see. What, exactly, does it do?"
"It… doesn't control people. It's not a Manipulate, but it does…" When he trails off, I wait, neither patiently nor impatiently, for his prevarication to end, and after a few moments he carries on, "It influences someone's decisions, in that it intensifies whatever inclinations are already present. Basically… it… lowers the inhibitions of the selected target."
"You have created a date rape Materia."
"That is not what I made it for!" he cries out adamantly to refute the claim, before tempering himself and disclosing with a convincing display of shame, "Or, at least, that is never what I intended to use it for. Tseng, I'm so sor-"
"I don't want to hear it," I cut off his apology with no inflection. "How long have you been using it on me? Since I arrived in Edge?"
"No, just tonight, I swear, and even then, at first I… I activated it because I wanted…"
After the silence extends for several minutes in which I stare with unwavering focus at the object of our discussion and it becomes plain that he is not going to resume, I reluctantly drag my gaze from his outstretched palm up to his face and ask, "What did you want?"
"I wanted to know if I could trust you fully." Breathing out a long-suffering sigh, he distractedly runs his empty hand through his wildly askew hair and mutters ruefully, "But all I have learned is that I can't trust myself."
"That's not all."
The pain that floods his expression in reaction, filling him with a mute and pleading light, seems so genuine that I begin to feel the involuntary stirrings of a faint yearning to believe his remorse as he looks at me closely. "I honestly… I didn't think that… I thought that you and Elena were… That you were completely straight and it never even occurred to me to worry about any actual attraction on your part."
"Really," I state emphatically, and when I find my sight unerringly attempting to return to the Materia, I snap, "Turn that off."
He complies immediately and the luminous sphere winks into a glittering and dusky inert silhouette. Closing his fingers around it and lowering his arm, he repeats in confirmation, "Really."
"You thought I was faking?"
"Do you think I'm blind?" he inquires instead of answering. When I give no indication of responding other than a tensing of my facial features, he presses further, "Do you think I can't see that you have decided to make me some sort of, of personal mission? You don't cater to anyone without a reason, and yet you've been oh so accommodating of nearly everything I've thrown at you. Listening attentively to my babbling, trying to make me laugh, even giving me a back rub, for Shiva's sake! I know that… you are capable of doing things you don't want to, sacrificing your values, if you believe the goal to be worth the cost."
"When you put it that way, it sounds obvious, but regardless of what you think I'm capable of, I'm not a whore," I bite out and realize instantly that it is not a prudent selection of words.
The smile that graces his lips is bitter and mocking. "Of course you are not a whore. Whoring is so far below the flawless standards of a respectable individual such as yourself."
"Are you trying to get me to forgive you or piss me off more?'
"Two wrongs don't make a right, and I'm not going to simply tolerate your bigotry because I feel guilty. And would you be willing to forgive me? Can something like this be forgiven? Am I not wasting my time?"
"I don't know, but heckling me isn't helping your case."
"I suppose not… Is there a way I can make it up to you? Just say the word and I will do- Well, not anything, but I can't think of much that I would refuse you right now." The skin around his eyes crinkles with an amusement that fails to wholly chase away the melancholy in their depths and he offers me a crooked grin as he remarks, "I have no doubt that you could come up with a suitable punishment for my transgression."
I groan low in my throat and declare gruffly, "Tuesti, too soon."
"I'm sorry. You're positively correct, that was inappropriate. The last thing I want to do is to diminish your… how you feel, but humor is a defense mechanism of mine and it's a habit that tends to crop up in some of the worst situations." The twist to his mouth becomes self-deprecating and he adds, "Especially when I'm nervous."
"I don't know how I feel yet. I need time to process this."
"Of course! Absolutely. Take all the time you need! There is no rush whatsoev-"
"Tuesti!" I bark harshly and he shuts up. "Too much contrition."
"Tell me how you want me to behave, then," he responds with a tinge of petulance.
"Like yourself, if you even know who that is."
He utters a slightly shrill laugh and then replies airily, "I don't believe I do, not anymore."
I shake my head, the weight of everything that has transpired seeming to crash down upon me in an instant and any motivation I have inside to deal further with his idiosyncrasies departs, leaving behind little but a deep-seated exhaustion. "You wear me out and it's late." I glance briefly at my watch and grimace, amending, "Early, almost four in the morning, but we should be able to manage a couple hours of sleep. Come to bed."
"What?" His eyes widen to an even greater extent than the comedic miens I have already born witness to, astonishment endearingly clear.
"Come. To. Bed," I repeat my order sternly.
"But, you can't want to sleep together, not now."
"What did I say about telling me what I want?"
"Yes, but… you… you are utterly perplexing," he concludes his thought with a pointedly dubious stare.
"Then we're even. Get over here," I demand and wave at his previously vacated spot near the wall, the blankets still bunched up where I had cast them aside after freeing him in what seems like a lifetime ago. When he continues to stand motionless, I taunt, "Unless you're afraid?"
"No, I just don't- Why? I don't understand why you are willing to stay here or let me stay with you."
Sighing, I reach through the concealed openings of my jacket that allow for a cross draw and retrieve the guns from my shoulder holster with practiced efficiency, before automatically checking that the safeties are engaged and sliding both firearms under my pillow. There are more weapons hidden strategically beneath my clothing, but nothing of a bulk that will disturb my comfort significantly. I return my gaze to Tuesti as I smooth down the fabric of my suit and mutter, "Always have to know everything."
"Not everything, but I would like to know this. Please explain," he implores.
"How I end up feeling doesn't matter, ultimately," I say dismissively, wanting nothing more in this moment than to terminate our conversation and rest.
"It does matter."
"No, it doesn't. Whatever you do to me personally doesn't change anything. I still plan to protect you, help out with the mess at the WRO however possible, but most importantly, keep you sane, if I can."
"Tseng…"
"I might seek revenge for what you have done, I might not. I don't know. What I do know is that I want us to stop talking, I want to try to get some sleep, and I want you to join me here, where I can keep a close eye on you, right now." I pause and then alter my instructions for him, "Wait, silence your clock first."
Mystified, he states deliberately, "My clock is digital and doesn't make any noise except when the alarm goes off."
"What do you mean, it doesn't- What is ticking?" I growl accusingly as a habitual tendril of apprehension shivers down my spine in reaction to an unidentified mechanical sound.
"Oh, that!"
"Yes, that."
"That would be my metronome. You don't like it?"
"I hate it and want it to be silent."
His eyes shining with restrained mirth, he approaches a cabinet set against the wall not far from the bed and pulls one of its doors open to reveal the current bane to my enjoyment of peace and total quiet. The pendulum swings back and forth with deceptive innocence until he catches it gently and blessedly halts the maddeningly repetitious clicking. Tension that I had not been fully conscious of eases from my body when the mental echoes taper off and a complete hush descends on the room.
"Thank you," I breathe with sincere and heartfelt appreciation.
Muffled chuckles emerge from him as he covers his face with a hand while holding onto the shelf with the other and leans into the furniture for balance. The spectacle he presents should be ridiculous, but as I trace over the span of his profile, admiring how the rumpled dress shirt gapes apart to expose glimpses of his lean torso as his shoulders shake with his failed attempts of suppression, how taut and graceful the length of his long legs appear, a faint resonance of my earlier desire resurfaces. When he turns slightly, baring more of his flesh to my view with a proficiency that is too artful to be accidental, I direct my sight up to find his head slanted towards me. His expression is half-concealed in shadow but the solemn heat there is unambiguous.
"Are you sure you don't want anything else from me?" he questions softly.
"For you to stop trying to seduce me," I answer decisively with no hesitation or uncertainty in my voice.
The come-hither quality of his demeanor vanishes with an abruptness that is unnerving and is replaced with a neutral nonchalance as he straightens his posture, before he agrees lightly, "As you wish. Would you like for me to get dressed?"
Now I do hesitate, but it is brief and I allow, "No, that's fine."
He nods slowly, his eyes skating over my form for a moment, before he squares his shoulders and approaches the bed resolutely. Pausing to look down at me with another unreadable glance, he climbs onto the mattress and then over my legs without any inadvertent contact between us. I continue to watch him with detached objectivity as he lies down, reaching to tug the sheets up to cover his nakedness, and when he has settled, I scoot forward enough to provide adequate clearance to lower myself to my back beside him.
"Well, this is definitely not awkward," he eventually murmurs to break the relaxing stillness while I gaze up at the pleated material of the canopy, and I internally curse all of the choices I have ever made.
I roll onto my side and struggle not to react to how close our faces are brought to each other by the movement, steadfastly ignoring the warm exhalations of his breathing against my skin. I glower at him as effectively as I am able to in this compromising position and warn, "The next word out of your mouth will result in you being gagged and bound again, if necessary."
His lips part and I ready my body in preparation of fulfilling my threat, but he presses them back firmly together and only smiles at me affectionately instead, the dilation of his pupils from the low illumination making his appearance even more annoyingly cute as he nestles his head further into his pillow.
I brutally crush the tenderness that starts to well up within in response to the sight, along with my disappointment at his easy acquiescence, and then inform him evenly, "You need to decide what kind of master you are going to be and I will adjust my own behavior accordingly."
Closing my eyes to his shocked surprise, I savor the silence that ensues.
