Freak Holding Facility
Insanity, USA
The excitement and panic died down after Doppelganger was attacked by Major Scout Guy's posse and subsequently run over by Ninja Spy's car, but all traces of the Copycat Freak had vanished. And the Freaks, while still unsure of Doppelganger's current status, could honestly not care, so long as that menace was as far away from them as possible. Located at a nearby park and Freak Wildlife area, Christian Brutal Sniper sat idly on a bench, listening to the scenery and calm quiet all around, relaxing after the vicious battle against Necroborg. For some reason, he couldn't remember most of what happened. Last thing he remembered was Necroborg strangling him, and then waking up to a concerned looking Soldine and a large burn mark on the roof. Soldine claimed that Necroborg broke his neck, but came back as a sort of pseudo demon and murdered the undead cyborg with a burning sword, a claim Christian Brutal quickly dismissed as 'crazy by Freak standards'. While the rest of the group decided to continue the hunt everyone else gave up on, Christian Brutal decided that this was a target not worth butchering, and returned to Insanity, USA, leaving a letter of resignation on a note he stuck to bowie knife he jabbed into Pyrogun's shoulder. In the meantime, the murderous Australian monster relaxed, watching as a pair of Spycrabs scuttled for dominance, with a MeeM hiding in the bushes. It was so serene and quiet, he got a chance to close his eyes and truly relax.
"POOTIS!" Shouted a loud Russian voice, startling Christian Brutal awake. Snarling, Christian Brutal turned to the source of the sound and saw a RED Heavy sitting on the arm of the bench, posed like a bird, making a wide-eyed duck face, staring at him like a brain dead Tarsier (it's a tiny monkey, look it up). "Poot, pootis!"
"Guh…" Christian Brutal Sniper groaned, rubbing his face in irritation. "Pootis Birds."
"POOT POOT!" The Pootis Bird responded, hopping off the bench and pecking at the ground.
"Who up in the Eye came up with the bloody idea," Christian Brutal complained. "To make a Freak that literally has the brain of a pigeon?!"
Elsewhere…
"Yeah, I'll take one large bucket of chicken wings and a medium diet cola." Agent Splash said, ordering from his favorite fast food place. Paying the large sum, he happily took the bucket, adjusted his sunglasses, started walking to the table, and let out a strong sneeze that sent all the chicken wings flying into the air. Seeing his beloved food scattered upon the floor like a fried graveyard, he did the most reasonable thing he could. He turned back to the counter, and with a sheepish grin, asked if he could get another.
Back at Insanity, USA
Christian Brutal didn't really care about it anyway, although he did care that the things were nuisances and were just pests like MeeMs, Spycrabs, and the currently elusive Bluster Blaster Sentry. Slowly reaching behind his back, watching as the Pootis Bird continued it's pecking at dirt, he felt around for the familiar grip of one of his weapons. Finally, his fingers curled around a leathery hilt, allowing a wicked smirk to come across his face. Without any more hesitation, Christian Brutal flung the weapon and impaled the Pootis Bird right through the head, the steel sword digging into the ground like a red dowser. Christian Brutal laughed, but was quickly silenced by the sound of slowly clapping. The murderous man plucked a kunai from behind his back, turned to the source and found Gentlespy standing near the bench, clapping.
"Another well done kill, my friend." Gentlespy said, tilting his fedora upwards.
"Ah, Gentlespy," Christian Brutal sighed, tossing the kunai away, striking a nearby Scout MeeM in the chest. "What're you up to?" Gentlespy chuckled, folding his arms behind his back as he sat down next to his longtime friend.
"Can't a crazed killer go for a walk?" Gentlespy sarcastically asked. "And what about you? Didn't you run off with Major Scout Guy and a few ozzers to bring Doppelganger down?" Christian Brutal hissed slightly, eyes narrowing behind his sunglasses.
"Yeah, we tracked him to the Factory and grouped up with Soldine," Christian Brutal recounted. "And we found out he was going to hit Necroborg, who Cryo had apparently frozen yesterday," He took a moment to chuckle at the aghast face on Gentlespy's mug. "I know, that would've sent us REAL down under. He ended up getting' run over by Ninja Spy."
"But didn't he and Ninja Heavy-?" Gentlespy asked, but was quickly interrupted.
"Supposedly die in a car crash, yeah." Christian Brutal quickly said. "I don't get it either, but that doesn't really matter. Doppelganger somehow unfroze Necroborg. Bugger attacked me, Soldine, Scombine, and Pyrogun, Doppelganger escaped on the hood of Ninja Spy's car, and then things got…" Gentlespy noticed his friend was subconsciously rubbing the front of his neck. "Nuts. I blacked out when Necroborg was choking me."
"Strangling." Gentlespy corrected. "Choking is zomezing you do on a piece of poorly chewed food. Strangling is what you do with your bare hands around someone's neck… Preferably until zeir eyes pop out of zeir skulls." He noticed the blank stare he was getting from Christian Brutal. "Grammarian mistakes, zey bozzer me so much, I feel an innate need to correct them." Again, blank stare. "I don't get it either. Maybe it was inherited from the Freak creation process. So…. Continue."
"Oh, um, yeah." Christian Brutal stammered, regaining his train of thought. "So after I blacked out, I woke up on the ground, felt my heart and head were on fire, and saw Soldine standing over me and a huge scorch mark." Suddenly, a painful migraine ran through Christian Brutal's head, images flashed through his mind of himself and Necroborg's battle, appearing for less than a second then vanishing, along with the migraine. "I… I thought that bloody robot was the one who offed Necroborg, but he said I apparently did it. Heh, with a bloody demon weapon, apparently!"
"A demon weapon?" Gentlespy inquired, quirking an eyebrow beneath his balaclava. "I wasn't aware a weapon like zat was in your arsenal."
"Ah, I don't." Christian Brutal waved dismissively. "After I woke up and Soldine told me what happened, I didn't believe him. I proved that theory by pullin' as many weapons as I could." To further reiterated the point, Christian Brutal stood up, reached behind his back, and began pulling out weapons of various types and tools. Soon enough, he had accumulated a modest pile of swords, machetes, axes, hammers, shields, knives, and even his Arrow-zooka, but not a single demonic weapon. "See? No bloody dark blade, nightmare scythe, or haunted head-lopper." He picked up the weapons and tossed them all aside, crushing a nearby Pootis Bird by accident. "Just the usual armory." He sat back down, folding his arms. "After that, I decided this wasn't worth the kill, left 'em a little note of resignation pinned to a Black Rose, packed up and now," He waved his arms for emphasis. "Here I am."
"So… Doppelganger is still at large, zen?" Gentlespy asked, still hung up on the dire situation at hand.
"Ah, who gives a toss?" Christian Brutal said, placing his hat atop his eyes. "Whatever unlucky sod crosses him is their problem, not mine. And besides, what's the worst that can happen?" And then a Pootis Bird flew atop his head, somehow not crushing the Australian murderer under its weight.
"POOT!"
RED Base (Or the Crater Formerly Known As…)
To say the RED Team Mercenaries were able to hold their ground against the heavily super-powered, arsenal toting, and completely deranged Doppelganger, would be like saying a snowman has a chance of survival in Phoenix, Arizona, during the Summer Solstice at noon at a barbeque. The instant Doppelganger entered the room, the mercenaries disengaged the non-existent safeties on their weapons, aimed for the target, and trapped the white-suited copycat in Bullet Hell. Every single shot fired was a guaranteed hit on Doppelganger, covering the entire third of the room in smoke and gunpowder until every single pull of a trigger sounded with a click. The moment the dust cleared, everyone's jaws dropped to see that Doppelganger hadn't even moved from his spot. Every single shot fired had indeed made its mark, but not in a lethal method. The bullets and rockets had somehow managed to form a cocoon around Doppelganger, with nothing but his arms and face poking from the lead shell.
"Ooh, cozy." Doppelganger said. Using his free arms, Doppelganger began to somehow mold the ammunition around himself in the distinct shape of a large, unsettlingly familiar mound.
"Reload, reload, reload, damn it, RELOAD!" Scout frantically shouted, grabbing the shells from his belt, while the other mercenaries did the same. When they looked up, however, they saw that Doppelganger had succeeded in turning the entire stockpile of bullets, rockets, and flares, into a gigantic makeshift rocket. And it was aimed right at them, with the mad smirk on Doppelganger's face right on the tip.
"Ready…" Doppelganger drawled, poking a hand out. "Steady…" He snapped his fingers, a small flame igniting on his hand.
"GET DOWN!" Soldier shouted, dropping to the floor and slamming his hands on his helmet.
"DRAW!" Doppelganger bellowed, using his fire powers to ignite the back of the bullet-rocket. The other mercenaries, for once, heeded Soldier's orders, dove to the ground as Doppelganger's rocket whizzed right past them. It impacted into the steel wall, and with the force of a thousand Demomen, exploded in a bright ball of fire, consuming everything in a blinding light. From an outsider perspective, they'd be witnessing a small scale version of an atomic explosion… If anyone else in the badlands were in the general vicinity and were dumb enough to be close enough to a blast zone.
As the dust settled and the smoke drifted off into the wind, a minor percentage of the Reliable Excavation Division Base of Operations was reduced to a smoldering crater the ground, specifically the Mercenary's barracks, the Intelligence Storage Room, and the cafeteria. The mercenaries lay strewn about, burned and bruised all over, scattered from the blast and painfully injured. Intelligent Heavy was stuck with his rump in what used to be the sink, while Seeman and Seedler meekly crawled out of a lead lined refrigerator that somehow miraculously survived the explosion, and left the two completely unharmed.
"How in Sam Hill did they-?" Engineer asked, seeing the two See Freaks crawl out of the burnt and dented fridge as he lay a foot away from them. His eyes immediately landed on the manufacturer's logo, and answered the question for them. "Oh. Aperture. Right…" And then he decided the dirt would make a great pillow, plopping his head to the ground with an unceremonious thud.
At the very epicenter of the crater, Doppelganger stood tall, completely unharmed and free of stains on his white suit. The Copycat Freak looked around, seeing the catastrophe he caused all around him. The decimated landscape, the ruinous buildings, the defeated and injured RED Mercenaries scattered before him. It was beautiful, in his eyes. A small chuckle escaped his lips, calm and quiet, then building up into a much louder, disturbed laughter. Finally, he threw his head back, howling the laughter of a madman, as though he looked to God himself and cackled in his face. All those still conscious looked on in horror, seeing the full implications of letting a truly dangerous Freak like that run rampant, the world his playground of pandemic. He continued for a solid three minutes, before immediately going silent.
"Never again will I copy a demented Freak." Doppelganger softly said. "I'm starting to scare myself."
Freak Holding Facility
Eye in the Sky Checkpoint
"For the last time, I HAVE CLEARANCE TO LEAVE!" Major Scout Guy fumed, raising his voice at the heavily armored guard. Upon chasing down Ninja Spy's car out of the Factory and into the Crazed Countryside, Major, Medizard, Magic Mann, and Scombine regrouped to continue the hunt for Doppelganger. They had followed the skid marks and found the black car completely totaled, but Ninja Spy and Ninja Heavy were nowhere to be found, Robo-Engie was dead, and Doppelganger had apparently run off. Soon after, they found a massacre of Clones and lesser Freaks, as well as a destroyed home. Scavenging the ruins, they found T. Engie grieving over a fallen Rabid Heavy, the two having fought Doppelganger, but the beast Freak was slain in battle. He told them Doppelganger was after Seeman and Seedler, and those two had flown the coop. Going on all other possible leads, they decided to go to the source of all Freak Activity, the Eye in the Sky. Unfortunately, the guards were… less than helpful.
"I'm sorry, sir," The guard said, his hand curled around a standard issue magnum pistol, while his face masked behind orange goggles and military gear betrayed no emotion. "But under strict orders of the Administrator, no Freaks, even if they have high clearance recognition, are allowed outside Facility boundaries, even to the Eye in the Sky, until the Doppelganger situation is contained."
"But we're the ones who've been huntin' him down!" Major Scout Guy exclaimed. "You HECU guys don't do crap!"
"Affirmative." Soldine droned. "HECU Security Task Force is insufficient in detaining high level threat Freak subjects, as evident in recent Containment Breach." He thumped his metal chest. "Mission parameters must be met."
The guard blinked, grumbling to himself. "Look, I have my orders, and I can't let you through, no matter what."
"Not even if I turn that pistol of yours into a rubber duck?" Magic Mann asked, prodding the guard in the chest. "And for the record, I ain't referring to the gun." The two stared each other down, neither side breaking eye contact with the other. This went on for a full minute before the guard got bored and turned his Taser on Magic Mann, pegged him with two wired prongs to the breast, and pumped 1500 volts through his body. The impish Freak reacted with vicious spasms, frantic twitches, and impressive dance moves, before finally collapsing on the ground, somehow with his hair smoking a bit.
"Anyone else want to get any fancy ideas?" The guard asked, giving his Taser another buzz. Everyone else remained quiet, while Medizard cast a gust of chilling wind at Magic Mann's head, attempting to quell the flames… but inadvertently freezing his head solid. On the large wall and gateway behind the guard, a computer monitor fizzled to life, displaying a distraught image of Miss Pauling on the screen.
"HECU Eye Outpost, I have urgent orders from the Administrator for all HECU soldiers." Miss Pauling said in a frantic tone. "Doppelganger has escaped the Freak Holding Facilities and reached the RED Base..." She paused for a moment, biting her lip. "And completely destroyed part of it." The Freak's eyes widened, gathering around the monitor as they listened to Miss Pauling's news. "No information has been uncovered as to any survivors on the attack, but I know the REDs are still alive. HECU can't deal with this threat alone. On strict instructions from the Administrator, I'm ordering to all HECU Freaks and teammates to report to the Eye in the Sky and get on the next train to RED Base and kill that Copycat son of a bitch." With a click, the monitor deactivated, leaving the guard in stunned silence. He glanced at the Freaks, all of whom sporting mischievous and wicked grins (except Magic Mann, his face still frozen in shocked pain within the ice). Quickly, he grabbed his keycard and unlocked the door, the metal barrier sliding down and leading into the tunnels to the Eye in the Sky.
"Thanks a heap, buddy." Major Scout Guy said, patting the guard on the shoulder as he walked by.
"Danke." Medizard greeted, tipping his hat as he followed Major.
"Your performance will be stated on your official record." Soldine droned, stomping past the guard. Magic Mann followed after, floating lazily behind Soldine as he worked to thaw the ice around his head. Just as soon as he escaped eyesight of the guard, the trickster magi snapped his fingers, and with an audible pop, he could hear the guard screaming in terror behind him. If his face weren't catching frost burn, he'd be smiling right now.
Freak-Lopedia
HECU
The Hazardous Environment Combat Unit (HECU) is a battalion of personal military designed for combating Freaks and Monsters. Among the many special task force units created by the Government, the HECU were initially employed for military clean-up operations. After the extremely botched Black Mesa Operation, HECU was nearly disbanded before being bought as a private military by Mann Co. for dealing with Freak-based Operations. HECU serves as the main task-force in dealing with Freak Containment and Control, basing out at the Eye in the Sky and various checkpoints in the Freak Holding Facilities. These 800 well-trained soldiers work towards keeping the peace and handling difficult situations revolving around low to medium-level Freak threats, and extreme situations with Freak backing. Few notable Freak members of HECU are Soldine, Orangeman, Major Scout Guy (formerly), and Ghost. HECU militia are given high-level military gear and armaments, but are not permitted access to the Respawn Machines and are sworn to secrecy from the minute they enlist.
Author's Note: By Saxton Hale's glorious chest hair, we're on a roll with churing chapters out. Looks like both the Editor and I are really glad to be back in the swing of things.
When it came to the idea of Doppelganger's crazy laugh, we tossed ideas around whose laugh we wanted to base it off of. First it was Joker from Batman, then it was Ganondorf from Wind Waker, then Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars Episode III, we even considered Doctor Evil from Austin Powers for a moment. Finally, we settled on Kira's penultimate laughter from Death Note, just because it fits Doppelganger's demented state perfectly. And on the side note regarding HECU… We needed to fit them in somewhere and find a joke fitting enough… I hope this one worked.
~IDA Head Writer, Mask
