Chapter 32
Eye in the Sky
Agent Grease paced about the main room of the Eye, his fellow agents waiting alongside him for the BLU Team to arrive. It had been 2 hours since Ghost confirmed he delivered the letter, and the BLUs should have arrived by now. The crew-cut man rubbed the scruff of his beard, wondering what was taking them so long.
"Relax, Grease," Said Agent Splash, the blue-clothed man looking as lax as ever. "They'll be here when they get here."
"But they should have been here by now!" Agent Grease exclaimed, glaring at his partners. Agent Splash was lounging about in his chair, spinning around with not a care in his head. Agent Cinder seemed incredibly off ever since the Doppelganger incident cleared up, constantly checking the computers for something, but refused to say what. The only one who had a clear head on his shoulders was Agent Sci-Fi, the lab coat wearing agent patiently going over the papers on the current case. After what felt like an eternity, the elevator opened with a soft ding, and the BLU mercenaries fell out of the elevator, gasping for breath.
"That elevator is not meant to hold NINE FREAKING PEOPLE!" Scout exclaimed. "I sure ain't claustrophobic, but I'm Dutch-Oven-Phobic!"
"Fer once, Ah agree with Scout," Engineer said, adjusting his goggles. "Why do we keep listening to Soldier and his doggone stupid ideas?!"
"Let me know when ve figure zat out." Medic coughed. "Let's just agree no more burrito stops."
"You cannot deny me my baked bean treats!" Soldier shouted, bounding over the other BLUs and standing at attention before the Agents. "BLU Team reporting for duty. What job thing do you want us for?" Just as Agent Grease was about to explain the situation, he was immediately shoved away by a frantic looking Agent Cinder.
"Ah, good to see you're here." Cinder said as the other mercenaries gathered around. "Okay, you probably know who we are what we do here, but by protocol, I'm supposed to explain it to you anyway."
"Actually, we don't-." Spy said, but was cut off by the fiery-haired agent.
"We here at the Eye in the Sky are responsible for the creation, monitoring, deployment, and detaining of the Freaks." Agent Cinder rambled. "Each of us has a field of science that helps us excel in our duties, contributing to the grander scheme."
"I'm Agent Grease," Grease introduced. "I have a doctorate in Theoretical Physics and Biology. I'm the guy responsible for the basic structure of the Freaks."
"I'm Agent Sci-Fi," Sci-Fi said, dusting off his lab coat. "I earned my studies in Advanced Chemistry and Forensics. I manipulate the genetic makeup to give the Freaks their unusual powers via chemical alteration."
"Everyone calls me Agent Splash," Splash lazily said, still swirling in his chair. "I've got a PhD in Quantum Physics, but I don't flaunt it like these guys. I basically take the Freaks and see what I can do to make them as freaky as possible."
"And I am Agent Cinder," Cinder concluded. "My field is Bio-Psychology, in which I drastically shift the Freaks brainwaves to give them their quirks. Together we create the Freaks that you fight for survival at the behest of Mann Co. While we don't question the reason, we take pride in our work (and absurdly large paychecks). By our mind and our might, we have created meta-human life, and will do anything to protect it and the world from it." He flashed a wide smile at the mercenaries. "Any questions?" The nine BLUs were oddly silent, mostly from either a lack of interest or pure confusion. Scout was the first to respond.
"That guy has a PhD in Quantum Physics?" Scout asked, pointing at Agent Splash. "He looks like a college dropout!"
"Something you two have in common." Spy snidely remarked, causing Scout's face to flare red in rage.
"Looks can be deceiving," Splash lazily responded. "Something I figure you'd know well enough." Spy quirked an eyebrow, but before he could respond, Sniper immediately cut him off.
"So why did ya ring us up?" Sniper asked. "Your message from Ghost was kinda vague on the contract details." The four agents shot wary glances to each other, before giving a silent confirmation sealed with a nod.
"Whatever we tell you must never leave this room," Agent Sci-Fi said, flipping a switch on a nearby console. "I've just turned off the surveillance equipment in this room, so they can't track us."
"They who?" Medic asked.
"The Administrator," Agent Cinder said. "Saxton Hale, HECU, the Mann Bros, the very backers behind Project FREAK itself. They cannot know what we are about to tell you. Promise under pain of slow and excruciating torture that you will tell NO ONE of this." The mercenaries looked hesitant for a moment. "If you don't," He pulled out a magnum from the confines of his suit, with the other agents drawing pistols of their own. "I'd like to state that we deactivated the Respawn Machine in case you cross us." The nine men quickly promised to keep things secret for fear of their own lives. The four agents eased up and put their guns away.
"Smart move." Agent Grease said, walking over to a computer. "Two days ago, we received a bizarre report from our inside men in the Freak Holding Facilities. They found that there have been odd records of someone or something getting through checkpoints without proper clearance. And to make things stranger, each of the postings report no one actually entering or leaving the area."
"We first thought it was just Spycrabs or Freaks with invisibility powers playing tricks on us," Agent Splash said, reaching into a drawer by his desk. "But then one of the HECU guys found this." He pulled out a tin-foil wrapped burrito.
"A burrito?" Engineer asked, incredulously. Splash looked at his hand and sheepishly put the burrito back in the drawer.
"That's my lunch, sorry," Splash apologized. "I mean this." He pulled out a strange metallic object and tossed it to the mercenaries, which Spy promptly caught. The metallic object was odd, it appeared to look like a small metal spider with an oversized head and thorax, a single blue light on the head and a picture of a gear emblazoned on the bottom. "It was found in the center of one of our larger facilities, Insanity, USA, when it was picked up by one of our more sane Freaks, a Scout Freak to be exact. It had apparently been damaged, but was emitting a strange radio signal before it shut down."
"We have no idea what it is, who made it, or where it came from" Sci-Fi explained. "But the real issue is that someone is aware of Project FREAK."
"How exactly is that a bad thing?" Scout asked, earning a harsh glare from Cinder and Grease.
"How is it a bad thing, he asks?" Cinder said with a snarl. "Oh, it's nothing. Unless you consider someone learning about a black-level, completely illegal, immoral, unsanctioned, unethical, and potentially dangerous military level project to be 'nothing'." Scout scowled at the fiery haired man, while most of the mercenaries gaped in shock.
"This isn't just weird science we're doing here," Grease said, folding his arms. "We're breaking numerous laws of government, science, and ethics just to keep our paychecks. You think the US Government would allow a company that mostly sells gravel, hats, and guns and openly hires mercenaries and assassins to run scientific experiments to create meta-humans with the power to level half the country under legal jurisdiction?! I mean, look at what happened to Black Mesa after that little disaster they had!"
"Then why do it at all?" Sniper asked. "If this work is so bloody dangerous, then why risk it all like high-stakes poker?" Agent Splash responded by pulling out a paycheck he received a few days prior and shoved it in Sniper's face. A few seconds of reading, Sniper took off his sunglasses with a wide eyed look sure to make most fish jealous. "Point taken."
"Large pocket cash aside," Cinder continued. "All four of us already have a bit of history with the government and law and want to distance ourselves from any form of imprisonment."
"Embezzlement, theft, conspiracy, tax fraud," Splash listed. "Hijacking, espionage, smuggling, gorilla-cide…"
"That gorilla knew too much!" Grease shouted, shaking his fist.
"Jonny Law isn't too kind to us," Splash said. "But Mann Co. and HECU offer us protection in exchange for doing their dirty work. Plus there's the looming threat of Miss Pauling putting us in self-dug shallow graves with bullets in the brain that keeps us in line." The surfer agent rose from his seat and snatched the robotic spider away. "But we didn't call you here just for a heart to heart. We called you to get some dirty work done." Agent Sci-Fi walked over to Engineer and handed him a white PDA.
"We've modified with device with a radar designed to locate more of these strange cameras across the Facilities." Sci-Fi explained. "We can't let HECU or the Administrator know about this, so you'll be going in with forged documents. Find all the bugs and you'll be handsomely rewarded with a few extra zeroes on your paychecks." Engineer examined the PDA, remarking how similar in design it was to his own, yet oddly more advanced.
"How can you promise an increase in our finances without drawing attention from the Administrator?" Spy asked, quirking his eyebrow.
"I was a professional hacker and digital thief before Mann Co. hired me." Sci-Fi said, a slightly proud smile on his face. "I once stole a fortune from Aperture Innovations without even getting caught. I'm sure the Administrator and the Mann brothers won't notice a few tens of thousands missing from reserve." The four agents grouped together, staring down the nine killers with serious glares. "So, gentlemen and whatever the pyromaniac is," They all extended their hands. "Do we have a deal? You save our hides, you make an extra couple bucks in turn. Seems like a fair deal." The nine mercenaries glanced to each other, unsure about the entire scenario.
"GROUP HUDDLE!" Soldier shouted, the BLUs immediately converging together and speaking in hushed whispers. "So what do we think boys? Do we trust the maggots?"
"They just admitted they're a bunch of criminals to our faces," Scout said. "And one of them murdered a gorilla!"
"Zat's a problem vis you?" Medic asked. "Don't be such a baby." Scout growled, but Spy quickly silenced him.
"Aside from zat notion of zeir background," The Frenchman said, rolling his eyes. "Especially given who we are, ze real issue is of ze job."
"Ah agree with ya there." Engineer noted. "We go in there, we'd be nothin' but mice surrounded by a bunch of giant mutant mice with a thirst for blood. We don't even know if the Respawn would save us if we bit one out there."
"I say we risk it, lads." Demoman said, a smirk appearing on his face. "Sure, the risks are high as a kite, but think about the pay-raise! Plus, having these bastards on our side might make things easier for us in the long run."
"Like Freak Support?" Sniper asked, the Scotsman nodding in response. "… He's got a bit of a point, mates. I say we put it to vote. All in favor of taking the job?" Sniper, Demoman, Heavy, Soldier, Medic, and Pyro all raised their hands. "All opposed?" Engineer, Spy and Scout raised their hands. "The 'ayes' have it." The BLUs broke their formation and turned towards the four agents, hands still extended in hopes of an answer. "We'll do it, but there better be no funny business." One by one, the mercenaries shook the hands of the agents (the four men checking for broken bones after Heavy went up to bat), and sealed the deal.
"Perfect," Grease said, pulling a file from his desk. "We'll arrange a transport to send you to Insanity, USA, under the guise of a new batch of Clones for the Freaks to toy with." He slipped the file into Medic's hands. "You'll be put in touch with one of the Freaks who is in the know, the Scout Freak who found the bug, and start off from there. We'll keep you posted as you go." The man dropped into a salute. "Good luck, gentlemen." The only one to actually salute was Soldier, accidentally smacking himself in the face. The BLUs once again piled into an elevator, the doors sealing behind them as they embarked on yet another dangerous mission. The agents returned to their desks, getting back to their jobs, but Agent Cinder noticed a document open up on his desk, written in a code font: They're going to need it. ;-P
"Damn it." Cinder swore, closing the document. "It's getting worse…."
Freak Holding Facility: The Factory
Dr. Schadenfreude's Secret Laboratory
With the sudden calmness after the Doppelganger debacle, the Freak Holding Facilities were able to breathe peacefully all over. That is, all over except a certain hidden-yet-not-exactly Laboratory of the Medic Freak, Dr. Schadenfreude. The mad doctor had been tirelessly working on another of his experiments, satisfied at Ninja Spy's success at his latest creation. Now all he had to do was wait for the fireworks to show. A sudden alert popped up on Dr. Schadenfreude's monitor, to which the 'good' doctor answered. On the screen was the unmistakable mask of Sentinel, the Demon Soldier Freak, looking less than bemused.
"A recent issue has arisen," Sentinel said. "According to the Men of Mystery, the Agents of the Eye have sent in the BLU Team to Insanity, USA, in regards to the cameras one of our benefactors has provided us." Dr. Schadenfreude spared a small glance at one of his work tables, where the devices lay inactive. "Should things be disrupted, the master will be most displeased."
"I vould no seek to earn ze wrath of your master, Sentinel," Dr. Schadenfreude said, bowing slightly. "But ze Bugs are scattered throughout ze Facilities, zere is no possible chance of zem all being found."
"Do not grow overconfident, doctor." Sentinel growled. "Your defeat at Soldine's hands was of your own carelessness, do not make the same mistake again with the Mercenaries." He waved his arm with commanding force. "Deal with them immediately, or I'll present your head to Nightmare on a platter." The message cut out, leaving Dr. Schadenfreude both irritated and with a chill down his spine. He turned about, drumming his fingers and examining his lab.
"Razor! Shriek! Golem!" Dr. Schadenfreude called out. "I have a new mission for you!" No sooner had the Medic Freak called out the names did three others enter the room. First was a grey clothed Sniper Freak, adorned in a grey stocking cap, black round sunglasses, and a grey bandana across his mouth, appearing very cool and collected. Second was a grey clothed Scout Freak, wearing a courier hat and having a boom box strapped to his back, seeming giddy and bouncing in place. Third was an extremely muscular grey Heavy Freak, the only notable difference in appearance being the brown mat of hair on his head, who simply stood in place. "You are to have to Insanity, USA, and deal vis ze BLU Mercenaries pretending to be Clones." He drew a gloved thumb across his neck. "Do not disappoint me."
"Yessir." Razor and Shriek said, while Golem simply nodded. The three grey Freaks turned and left, leaving Dr. Schadenfreude to his lonesome. The doctor sat down in his chair, drumming his fingers and smiling with wicked glee.
"I love being evil."
Freak-Lopedia
Razor
Razor is a GRY Sniper Freak, created by YouTuber SarisKhan. The leader of Dr. Schadenfreude's lesser minions, Razor is a cold and calculating individual who can read a battlefield situation and exploit it to his own means. Already a master tactician and military expert, Razor can turn the environment around him into a weapon, both figuratively and literally, from using anything nearby to fight. Like his fellows, Razor possesses a super power, his being metallokinesis, manipulation of metal objects. As such, Razor can turn stop signs into battle axes, sewer grates into a suit of armor, sheets of metal into fully functional firearms, and so on, all through touch. Razor can even bend metal into a weapon, able to warp it to ensnare opponents or summon sharp spikes, provided he can touch it first. In dire moments, Razor can engage Steel Mode, where he cocoons his entire body in a layer of metal, making him nearly impenetrable to all melee weapons and small arms, and even can add weapons to his form to become a walking tank. Razor is only powerful in areas he can make a weapon, and thus is poor in hand to hand, and can fall easily to electric and fire based attacks, especially in Steel Mode.
Shriek
Shriek is a GRY Scout Freak, created by YouTuber SarisKhan. One of Dr. Schadenfreude's minions, Shriek is a hyperactive and, often annoying, menace towards both enemies and allies. Genetic enhancements have given him super speed, allowing him to literally run circles around opponents, enabling him to avoid even the fastest of attacks and deal lightning fast blows of his own. Shriek, like his fellows, has a super power, his being Sonokinesis, power over sound itself. Shriek can erupt ear-shattering soundwaves, thunderous shockwave claps, and just generally loud noises. In a pinch, he can activate his Sonic Mode, in which he moves so fast he's practically immaterial. Shriek is very vulnerable, and cannot handle a direct fight, especially against foes with electric and energy based attacks.
Golem
Golem is a GRY Heavy Freak, created by YouTuber SarisKhan. One of Dr. Schadenfreude's minions, Golem is a quiet yet extremely loyal force to be reckoned with. Genetic experiments have given Golem strength twice that of a normal Heavy, and is equally as durable, able to withstand the hardest of blows and even bullets! Like his partners, Golem is super powered, sporting Geokinesis, the power to manipulate the earth itself. Golem summon large pillars and boulders to crush his opponents and even cause small earthquakes, and can create a suit of stone-like armor known as Golem mode, increasing his defense to absurd levels. He is, however, extremely slow due to his size and strength, and can only use his Geokinesis in earth-rich areas. He is extremely vulnerable to water and ice based attacks.
Author's Note: The Agents finally get some personification, HUZZAH! Now we get into our next big plot! Any ideas on where those weird cameras came from, who are Schadenfreude and Nightmare Medic working with, and Agent Splash has a PhD in Quantum Physics? Really? Catch you on the flipside!
~IDA Official, Head Writer Mask
