Chapter Seven
I was so surprised when I woke up in the morning, because I didn't remember dreaming at all. Although, thinking about it, it wasn't that much of a surprise when I remembered how tired I was when I went to bed.
I laid there for several minutes, and now that the panic was gone, I could reflect.
What was the next step from here? If there even was one. I suddenly understood Carlisle's point of view a little better. He wanted to keep me away from him, and for good reason.
Heather said she would help. I wondered briefly how that talk with him went. He might be free again, but she wouldn't let him come after me. What could she do, though? She seemed to believe that she had some sort of say. I would probably never know.
I rolled out of bed when the smell of breakfast made it impossible to stay. I was starving, and without the emotion, I needed to eat.
I found Esme in the kitchen, just pulling the bacon out of the pan. She only ever made a few pieces at a time, as going all out was pointless. I couldn't eat that much, so she planned my meals around that. She was pretty good at it.
"Good morning, sweetie." She greeted gently as I sat down in my usual seat at the counter. "How are you feeling?"
"Weird." I answered quietly. I was still rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. "I think I slept too much."
"You needed it." She pointed out, setting a plate in front of me. I reached for the toast first.
"Have you heard anything from Richard?" I asked, looking up at her. She seemed reluctant to answer.
"He's coming over soon." She said. "Apparently, there's a lot he needs to discuss with us, and he'd rather not do it over the phone."
I nodded a little, taking another bite. I had a suspicion that Jasper had a handle on my emotions, because that didn't really bother me. It was rare he took them over right when I woke up.
I heard the TV on in the living room, but it was news again, so I ignored it. I did look over, though, as Alice walked in. Jasper right behind her.
"Thank you." I told him first, fresh from my realization, and he gave me a nod.
"Where's Emmett?" I asked, looking back at Alice.
"He and Rosalie are still out." She answered, taking the seat next to me. "It happens sometimes." I frowned a little, confused. Geez, how long was that hunting trip?
"So it's okay to talk about it?" I asked, and though she seemed surprised, she nodded. She must have thought I'd rather avoid it. "I think I did some thinking while I was asleep."
"In a good way, I hope." Alice replied, and I glanced over as Jasper leaned against the wall. He was probably interested too. It wasn't often that I talked to them about anything involving Jack. It'd always been Carlisle.
"So.." I started, setting my fork down. "I know it could have just been him trying to confuse me, but.. He said he should thank me. I still don't get it. Did he mean that something I did let him out?"
They didn't want to answer that one, given their expressions when I glanced between them.
"Okay, so.. What could I have done that let him out?" I asked, continuing anyway. "And how do we make him go back? He can go back, right?"
"It's hard to say." Alice finally answered. "I don't know if he was being truthful, but we won't know if it's possible to send him back until we find out what Richard knows."
I nodded again. Normally, several pieces of that statement would have terrified me, but Jasper was doing a really good job.
"There's another thing I can't figure out." I mumbled. "He told me to not tell Josh or Zack about him, which means he probably doesn't want me to see them at all, but Heather said that she'd figure out a way for me to see them. How is she supposed to let me see them without Jack getting mad?"
"Let him get mad." Jasper replied. "We're not going to cater to his demands."
"You kind of.. Already are." I pointed out, and he frowned a little. "Keeping me here just lets him win. That's what he wants, like I said."
I could see he didn't have a reply to that, so I just went on.
"Heather said it was her fault that my mom met Jack." I sighed, looking back down at my plate. "I have so many questions to ask her, but how do I even do that when I hate people asking me questions about Jack?"
"I think it would be good for you to get to know her." Esme smiled a little. "She certainly seems to care a lot about you, sweetie. I can see why."
I smiled a little at her compliment.
"I wish I could remember them from before." I admitted. "Then at least I'd have one good memory from when I was little."
"Maybe she has pictures from back then." Alice suggested, and I looked over. "I'm sure she has one."
I nodded again. That was a good idea. Maybe seeing a picture would make it seem more real.
"I think you need a distraction." Alice suddenly told me. "We can go to Port Angeles if you want. We can do some shopping." That actually brought a smile to my face. The fact that she thought I'd want to was a little funny.
"Nah." I sighed quietly, ripping at a piece of bacon. "Thanks, though."
This feeling was quite different than ones I'd had before, and definitely different from what I usually felt like when Jasper handled my emotions. I just kind of wanted to sit there. Not up for doing much of anything.
"Come on." She smiled softly. "We haven't spent much time together lately. I miss my sister." Again, she got a smile from me.
"Okay." I mumbled. "But I'm going to make it hard on you." She seemed surprised. "We can go to Port Angeles today, but you're not allowed to buy anything."
She gasped. "Now that's just cruel." I laughed a little, shaking my head. She gave me a smile, so I knew she wasn't actually offended.
She sighed and stood up, standing behind me and pulling my hair from my shoulders and running her fingers through it.
"You could use a trim." She commented. "Your hair is getting so long." I didn't mind her playing with my hair. I was often the target for her hair fixing, but it comforted me. I'd often considered just chopping it all off, especially after Jack had a hold of it, but I knew I probably never would.
She gathered it, and pulled it up. She paused for a second, holding my hair on my head. She sighed. Jasper stepped around as well as soon as the air hit the back of my neck, and I sensed the difference.
"He grabbed you here too?" She must not have known how bad it was.
"It's no big deal." I mumbled. "It doesn't hurt. I actually forgot about it." I knew from the feeling of it that it really wasn't that bad, but to them, any lasting marks were grounds for exterminating him.
"Just don't show that to Emmett." Alice murmured softly behind me, letting my hair drop back down over my neck. "He'll go even more nuts."
"Then I should leave my hair down." I agreed. "How's this one?" I turned a little, raising my chin.
"Hardly there." She told me after a quick look. I nodded.
"They'll go away in a couple of days. If it even takes that long."
"Probably." She agreed. "But Leandra.." I looked back, over my shoulder at her. "He laid a hand on you. Not just yesterday, but at all. That means that legally, we get to be the ones feeding it to him."
The completely serious look on her face made me laugh. She gave me a look that told me that she wasn't kidding. I knew she wasn't. I remembered what happened to Keith, but I shook my head.
"No. Don't do that." I said after a moment, looking back down at my plate. I nibbled on some eggs.
"Why not?" Alice asked, sectioning off just the top layer of my hair.
"Because." I replied. "You hurting him isn't gonna make me feel any better. It didn't with Keith either."
"But it will sure make me feel better." She countered. "If Jack thinks he's going to get away with hurting you, he's got another thing coming."
"Alice." Esme tried to shut her up.
"I know you don't want to hear this, but he is going to pay." Alice went on anyway. "I promise you, he will pay very dearly for every bit of pain he's ever caused you." I gave her a look. "We're not always teddy bears, Leandra. Men like him don't need to be allowed to exist. He should have considered the price he'd have to pay for doing the things he's done. He needed to stay in prison, if only for his own safety, but he just couldn't stay gone. Soon enough, he'll never be seen again. Don't you worry one bit."
I cringed a little at the thought.
"Won't you guys get into trouble or something for that?"
"Oh, we won't do a thing." She assured me, smoothing out the braid and starting over. I wasn't sure what she meant by that.
She'd just told me her plans, and now she was saying they wouldn't do anything. She didn't continue, and I didn't quite feel like asking. I needed a change of subject. I didn't like thinking about my family like that. Even if Jack did deserve it.
"Can we go somewhere else besides Port Angeles?" I asked in the silence, looking back at her. "Anywhere but there." I had history there.
"Anywhere that sells clothes." She replied lightly, as if she hadn't just been contemplating murder. "You could use a few new outfits, Leandra. You're growing so fast." I always felt a little proud when they told me things like that. It meant I was moving forward. I didn't feel that way when Jack brought it up, though. My slight smile faded.
"Alice." Esme murmured, to my surprise, in slight correction. Alice had said something that bothered her. I filed that observation away for later when I could ask without changing the subject.
"Okay, but just a couple." I didn't really want new clothes, but she was right. My favorite shirts were fitting a little snugly now.
"We'll go after Richard's visit." She nodded, and I appreciated that. Maybe a day out of here will help me feel better. "For now, let's talk about something else."
"Like what?" I asked, now a little hesitant.
"How about.." She paused. "Andrew." Despite the discomfort of the previous subject, I smiled. She laughed a little behind me, spotting that stupid smile immediately. "What's going on there?"
"What?" I asked, trying to force the smile off my face. "He was normal yesterday. Before Seattle, I mean."
"I doubt that." She said. "Are you blind? I've seen how he looks at you. Remember your adoption party? That wasn't nothing."
"Josh says he likes me." I shrugged a little. "I don't know though."
"I believe him." She said.
"I don't." I laughed a little. "I still don't get it. Andrew says Josh likes me, and Josh says Andrew likes me. Can that just happen? One minute they're normal, and the next, they're acting stupid. I was going to hit them both if they weren't normal yesterday."
"And what is normal?" She was just trying to keep me talking. Distracting me, and it was working.
"I don't know." I replied. "Normal. Not.. Nervous, and mad. For no reason, too. I don't like it. Andrew has never been that way before." She laughed a little. "What? It's true. I've never seen him act like that."
"Well, I think it's the cutest thing in the world." She commented. "Boys are simple creatures." Jasper smirked, and left the room. I didn't blame him one bit. Once again, she pulled out the braid in my hair, and restarting.
"I don't." I said. "Then Josh started acting the same way. In the kitchen, before Zack came to tell him that they had to go. Only weirder."
"Oh, weirder?" Alice asked, interested.
"I don't know." I shrugged. "It was probably the way he looked at me. It just made me feel weird."
"Boys will always like a pretty girl." She told me. "It's just something they do."
"I'm the wrong girl." I shook my head a little. "Because I'm not pretty."
"Yes you are." She said, outraged. "You're very pretty. And if you'd stop hitting people, more people would see it."
"Why would I want more people to think I'm pretty?" I asked, surprised. "It's the opposite of what I want. Maybe I should hit them both. Maybe then they wouldn't like me like that anymore."
"You're not supposed to hit him." She said, laughing a little. "Despite what Emmett says, boys are going to like you, and someday might even want to kiss you." I spun, looking back at her, horrified. "Especially since you tend to hang around them a lot. You're pretty, you're smart, and you're tough. It's something inevitable. Just try not to hit them when it happens."
"Maybe it's a good thing I'm not going to be around them very much anymore." I mumbled. "I don't want anybody kissing me. Especially Andrew. It'd be too weird."
"Oh, you're so young." She sighed, smiling dreamily. "You'll see some day."
"He's my best friend." I reasoned, shaking my head. "I don't think it'll ever be any less weird."
"That's why it's so cute." She laughed, hugging my shoulders. "Just don't worry so much about it right now."
"And why," I asked, turning to face her. "Do people keep telling me 'some day'. When is some day? Some day this, some day that. Some day never comes."
She laughed at my apparent irritation. "Some day when you're older. It means not today or tomorrow, but.. Some day." She paused, and I jumped at the sound of the door bell, looking toward it right as Esme started walking toward it. "Speaking of which, someone is here to see you."
I knew who it was, so I took a breath and nodded. I stood up to follow Esme.
"Hold it." Alice called, catching me before I could get very far. She pulled the new braid from my hair, fanning my now loose hair over my shoulders.
"Good catch." I told her, and she nodded, smiling a little.
I made my way into the living room, finding Andrew and Richard just coming in. Carlisle had been the one to let them in, Esme beside him. I glanced around, but Alice was already gone. Probably lurking nearby with Jasper.
I gave Andrew a small smile, and he seemed comforted by it. But only a little.
"Hey, sweetie." Richard greeted as we moved forward into the living area. "How are you feeling?"
"Okay, I guess." I answered. "Alice cheered me up." I smiled before the folder full of papers in Richard's hand caught my attention.
"I'm glad you're doing better." He replied, sighing. "Why don't you and Andrew go hang out in your room? I've got something I need to talk to Carlisle and Esme about."
"About Jack?" I asked hesitantly, and he nodded a little. "Can I stay?" He seemed like he was about to decline, so I went on. "I need to know. Whatever you found out, I just.. Need to know."
He hesitated, looking to Carlisle.
"It's alright." Carlisle allowed after his own hesitation.
"Okay." Richard sighed, sitting down. He placed the folder on the coffee table, opening it. I glanced at it, but immediately looked away at Jack's picture on the first page.
I chose to share the chair Esme had chosen to sit in, sort of squishing myself in there. She didn't mind given the way she started to smooth my hair. Andrew chose to stay standing, though, along with Carlisle. We were all sort of facing Richard who sat across the coffee table from us on the couch. I was silent, waiting for him to start.
"Okay." He sighed again. "It took a little bit of digging, because someone sure tried to bury it, but I know some people. Basically, what happened was Jack's petition to overturn was approved."
I didn't know what that meant, but given Esme's deep sigh, I knew it wasn't good.
"What does that mean?" I asked quietly.
"Ultimately, it means another trial." He explained patiently. He looked to Carlisle before he went on. "They'll be going over the evidence again, along with any new evidence, and depending on what they conclude, they'll decide whether or not it's worth it to try him again, or to just throw out the case."
"How was he able to get them to approve it?" Esme asked before I could.
"That's the rough part." Richard sighed, readjusting the way the folder was laid. He hesitated. He was about to continue when he cut off and I jumped at the sound of the front door opening.
"Hey, why is there a cop here?" Emmett called ahead of himself. "What'd shorty do now? This child is getting out of hand." Though I knew he knew it was only Richard, and though I knew he was joking, I tensed, looking over at Esme. She returned my look, so I knew she knew what I was thinking. Richard closed the folder.
I looked over, watching as he and Rose entered the room. I wasn't the only one that looked over, given the way he paused and looked around.
"Okay.." He muttered. "What did we miss?"
"A lot." Andrew muttered.
"I'm guessing he doesn't know?" Richard asked, looking up at Carlisle.
"No." Carlisle sighed.
"Maybe this should wait?"
"Can I tell him?" I asked, looking over at Esme. Maybe if I were to be the one to tell him, he wouldn't run off right away.
"Someone should." Emmett laughed, but I could tell he was tense.
"Come in and sit down. Both of you." Carlisle instructed, which he did without hesitation. I was grateful for that. That was a better idea. I looked up, watching Emmett as he walked by, heading for the other chair.
"What happened, shorty?" Emmett asked as he sat on the very edge of the chair. Rosalie chose to stay standing.
"Nothing happened.." I murmured, looking down. "Well, kinda, but.." Esme smoothed my hair.
"Please." Carlisle spoke again, looking to Richard. "Continue."
"Okay." Richard sighed again, looking back down at the folder. He was quiet for a second while he gathered his thoughts. "As I was saying before.. Because the appeal was already in place, his lawyer was able to swing it just right. Using the reports made against her."
Carlisle sighed as well, shaking his head.
"What reports?" I asked, looking between them.
"You're a very watched little girl, Leandra." Richard replied. "Every problem you've had involving school, and any run in with the police you've had, a report was made. You have quite the record here."
"How does what I do help Jack?" I was finally going to get that answer.
"Hold on." Emmett sat straighter. "Back up."
"It's very complicated, sweetie." Richard answered me sadly. "But there are many ways they could swing it, based on the evidence in Jack's defense. His lawyer is very motivated."
"He's out?" Emmett was obviously upset by that. Just like we knew he would be.
I frowned, though, ignoring Emmett for a second and thinking about it. Back to the trial. Jack's lawyer had been trying to convince everyone I was crazy, and that I was only blaming Jack because I didn't want to get into trouble for fighting. I remembered he had a list of things my old teachers said about me.
I just couldn't imagine why they would say those things. I hardly ever had problems before. Could it have been worse than I was remembering? I didn't really remember much of anything further back than a year or two. At least about school. It was like those memories were missing, but from what I could recall, I was fine. I always kept to myself just like I was taught.
I compared that list of things they said to the last year of my schooling. The entire last few weeks of fourth grade were a struggle for me, and right from the get-go, fifth grade was a mess, but more recently, it had only gotten worse.
Add that on to how many times they'd been called on me for running away, and running away at all, and I could kind of see what Richard was saying.
"I didn't know that would happen." I muttered, stopping a quiet argument between Esme and Emmett. "I didn't even think about that kinda stuff."
"No one blames you." Richard replied before anyone else could. "These are things you couldn't have understood."
"Nobody told me." I was a little defensive now. As much as I could be.
"We weren't aware that your record had been made available to him." Carlisle explained.
I looked down. I'd never even considered this to be one of the consequences of the things I did. Because of my tendency to attack people, they thought that Jack's lawyer had been telling the truth that day.
"Now, here's the strange part. This is the part that really.." Richard trailed off, and his voice had hardened. Anger shifting his tone. "I have no idea what they did with the attempted murder conviction, because it's not there."
"I'm sorry?" Esme nearly demanded. I leaned against her, looking up at her. I didn't like it much when she was upset, and that news had obviously upset her.
"It's nowhere in his file." He repeated, turning the folder toward her. I chose to look down instead of looking at the top page in the folder. "I've looked everywhere for it. I couldn't even find any record of it from the day it happened. He's obviously got someone on his side. It won't be hard to get that sucker back on there, especially if you've kept your own records, but the fact that it's gone now tells me they've got a massive corruption issue that needs to be addressed. Now."
"My records should be enough to set things back." Carlisle replied easily. "I have records of everything that happened that day, including surveillance footage of both ends of the corridor. I'll get you a copy."
"That's more than enough." Richard nodded, and Carlisle turned, swiftly leaving the room. I looked down as Rosalie followed him.
"So you're saying that because she's had a few rough days, Jack-ass gets to go free?" Emmett almost demanded. I didn't like him much when he was mad. I knew he'd never hurt me, but when he was really mad, everyone knew it.
"I hate it too." Richard replied. "It's hard for me to understand, too, but these guys don't get the full story. All they see are the things she does. They don't see the why. It's a completely different picture when they don't personally know her."
"Then make them see it." Emmett countered.
"I plan to." Richard nodded easily. "I do plan to."
I didn't like this. It made me feel worse than I thought it would. I looked up, across the room at Andrew. He was looking at me as well, the worry clear in his eyes. I took the hint. I sighed and waved to him, gesturing for him to follow me.
He took my advice, looking down as he crossed the room. I stood up and led him from the room. He followed me into my room, and I closed the door so nobody thought we would be trying to listen in.
"I know Emmett can be scary when he's mad, but he's just worried about me." I explained quietly. "Don't worry about him."
"No." He shook his head. "He's right. It's not that."
"Then what's wrong?" I asked, and he glanced up at me briefly before sighing and turning. Sitting on the bed. He looked down, and I hesitantly followed him. Again, I hated that something about me upset him. It was worse not knowing what it was.
"Come on." I insisted, now sitting cross-legged beside him. "Tell me."
"He told me." He finally mumbled, looking over at me. "My dad told me everything." I looked down. "He told me because.. I just wanted to know what this guy could do, and my dad thinks that me knowing will help me be a better friend."
I understood his mood now. That's why he'd been so quiet.
"How much did he tell you?"
He didn't reply right away. He sat quietly.
"Well, he tried to hide a lot of stuff." He admitted almost shamefully, glancing over at me and I closed my eyes. "But I figure it out when I saw the list of charges."
I hated that Andrew now knew. Not because I was mad at him, but because he now knew what kind of person Jack was, and I had to admit. I was pretty embarrassed now. It meant that he now knew my extremely personal things.
I didn't know what to say, so I started with the only thing I could.
"I'm sorry."
"Why are you sorry?" He asked, surprised.
I shrugged. "For a lot of reasons. Mostly because you know now. I never wanted you to find out."
"Why not?"
"Because with you, I used to get to just be normal." I explained. "Now you won't think of me the same way. Now, you probably don't like me anymore."
He seemed even more surprised. "Why wouldn't I still like you? Just because I know doesn't mean I think of you any different than I did before. It doesn't change you. You're still the same person. I just get you a little better now."
Jasper must have been letting me have my emotions again, because I stupidly started to cry. Slow, quiet tears, but they were definitely there.
"Hey, don't cry." He noticed. "Come on."
"I'm just so tired of it." I whimpered. "I'm tired of feeling like this."
"Then change it." Andrew replied, and I looked over at him.
"I can't." I replied. "I've tried. I just get mad. Your dad even said it was my fault Jack was let out."
"So try again." He insisted. "I'll help you, and it's not your fault. You only fought those kids because of what he put you through, and they can prove that. Do you even know how brave you are?"
"No I'm not." I sighed. "Not against Jack. How could I ever be?"
"I'm not talking about the fighting kind of brave." He countered. "I'm talking about the standing up kind. The strong kind. You bounce back, remember? There's something really amazing in you, and nobody like Jack can ever take that away from you. Not unless you let him, but you have so many reasons not to. You have your family. You have me. You even have my dad, and Heather. Charlie, and most of the police department. We're all on your side now. That has to count for something."
I sat silent for several seconds, letting that sink in.
"Don't give up." He murmured. "You can be scared. You're allowed to feel everything you feel, but bounce back. Get back up."
After enough thinking about it, I knew he was right. I swallowed my nervousness, and I didn't fight the smile that crossed my face. It was a small one, but it was a start. I couldn't help it. I looked over at him, now admiring him in a different way. It was like seeing the sun for the first time in a long time, and after living in the pitch darkness for so long, it was a really welcome feeling.
He smiled in return, and I knew he saw that he'd reached me.
"You got away." He pointed out. "You made it. Nothing he says can ever change that. Don't let him pull you back in, and definitely don't let him make you think you're crazy. Get back up, and put him back in jail."
"But what can I do?"
"Trusting is a good place to start."
"Trust?"
"Not just a little bit." He clarified. "All of it. You did it before. Trust yourself that you can- No.. You will do it again. I'll make sure of it. We all will. I'm not afraid of him."
Without hesitating, I reached over and hugged him. Oddly, I still wanted to cry. Not in sadness, but because I was so grateful to have someone like him fighting with me.
"I think I might." I laughed a little, swiping away a stray tear as I sat back.
"Might what?" He asked, still smiling.
"Marry you when we grow up."
He laughed, but put his arm around me. The weight of his arm made me feel better.
"If you're ever scared or sad, just talk to me." He offered. "I'll remind you why you don't need to be." I nodded a little. He held his free fist up to me, and I put mine against his. The contact was simple, but it meant a lot to me.
"There's just one thing I can't figure out." He added quietly. His smile fading. I looked over, waiting for him to continue as we let our hands fall. "How could he do those things to someone like you?"
"I stopped asking myself that a long time ago."
"If I knew you back then, I would have helped you."
"You wouldn't have known." I mumbled, shaking my head. "Nobody knew. Nobody else could have seen me but Carlisle."
"Why?"
"I was just that good at hiding it." I said. "I had to be. Carlisle saw things normal people can't."
"I would have seen you." Andrew replied. "How could I not?" I smiled a little, looking down as it faded.
"I can't give you any answers, Andrew." I murmured. "Jack does what he wants to do, and he gets away with it. End of story. That's how it works with him."
"If I know my dad, that's not end of story." He pointed out. "I don't even think he slept last night."
"Andrew." Richard called from the hallway. They must have been done talking. I smiled a little over at him, standing up first.
I led the way out of my room, but he followed close behind.
"Time to go, son." Richard waved him forward as I found Emmett's side. "I have a few calls to make."
"Did Heather give you their dad's name and stuff?" I asked curiously.
"She did, but surprise, he wasn't very helpful." He replied lightly. "It's alright, though. I don't really need him to be. I just need to know where he is."
"So what do we do now?"
"For now, you just hang in there." He assured me. "I'm on my way to Seattle today to right a few wrongs. They have a lot to answer for." He raised another, separate folder than the one he'd had before. That must have been the stuff Carlisle had given him.
"You won't get into trouble for doing that, will you?" I asked nervously.
"No." He said. "I'll be alright, sweetie. Don't you worry."
"How long will it take? To get him back there?"
"I'll do my best."
"Can I come with you to Seattle?" Andrew asked his dad, and I looked over at him.
"I don't see why not." Richard replied. "Unless you'd rather stay? It'll be pretty boring. All I'm doing is gathering information and filing my own reports."
"No." Andrew replied. "I wanna help however I can." Richard smiled a little, nodding. He took another breath.
"Okay." Richard nodded. "I'm off, but in the meantime, everyone needs to promise to let me handle it." He looked right at Emmett, pointing. "Behave yourselves, and everything will work out. I don't want to have to bring anyone in that's not supposed to be in."
It was kind of funny to see Richard scolding Emmett. I looked up as Emmett brought his hands up and covered my ears, but it didn't help. I could still hear.
"Any chance you can just.. Look away for five seconds?" Emmett asked anyway. "Jack-ass really needs to die." Andrew laughed to himself.
I shook my head out from between his hands, giving him a look.
"He's free because someone looked away." Richard pointed out. "I completely agree with you, but I've gotta do my job."
"Hey, he didn't play by the rules." Andrew countered. "Why should we have to?"
"I like him." Emmett pointed at him. "I agree with him."
"You're not helping things." Richard laughed through his teeth, ruffling Andrew's hair. He laughed as well, ducking away. Richard gave Emmett a look before they left, and I noticed.
"What was that about?" I chose to curl upright on the couch as Esme was walking them out.
"I might have let slip that I was looking forward to having a little chat with Jack-ass." Emmett answered, sitting next to me. "He doesn't think I'll leave him alive. He's right, but still."
I sighed, leaning against his side.
"Don't." I mumbled, keeping my eyes down. "Don't do anything."
I wasn't surprised when I looked up and saw Jasper descending the stairs as soon as the front door was closed. Alice right behind him, their hands connected.
"You're kidding, right?" Emmett asked me.
"No." I replied quietly. "I don't want you to get into trouble because of me, and I don't want.. I don't want to see you any different."
I didn't want to imagine that Emmett was capable of doing something like that. It bothered me enough knowing Alice was capable of it, but Emmett had always been the big squishy one. I needed that more than I needed him to be a murderer.
"Aw, shorty." He sighed, sounding a little bit like I'd just crushed all his fun like an empty soda can. I closed my eyes, resting them. I couldn't believe I was tired again.
"If you have to do it, don't tell me about it." I mumbled, my eyes still closed.
"I probably won't even have a chance." He replied easily. He placed his arm around me, hugging me into his side, ball and all.
"It'll be better to just assume he went back to prison." Alice assured me quietly. I nodded. She had a point. She looked at me, her tone lightening quite a bit. "Ready to go?"
It took me a second to remember that morning's discussion. Shopping. I hid my face in Emmett's arm.
"I don't wanna go anywhere now." I mumbled. "Remember? I gotta stay out of trouble. I can only do that by staying here."
"I can always just go by myself, and pick out things I know will look cute on you-"
I jumped up, and Emmett chuckled. I grumbled the entire way to my room to get dressed. Maybe I could just get this over with. If I was being honest with myself, though, a few hours out with Alice still didn't sound that bad. I didn't care what we were doing.
I came back out, surprised to find that Jasper was coming along with us.
"Just in case." Alice smiled a little, but I didn't mind.
To my surprise, I was even given the front seat. Jasper chose to sit in the back seat. That was my first indication that this probably wasn't just a simple shopping trip, and Jasper might be needed more than she let on.
Alice was given specific instructions, several times, to not let me out of her sight the entire time. I doubted she would anyway. Until Jack was sorted out, it would be better to be cautious.
The second we were on the highway, far enough away from the house, Alice sighed.
"I'm a little surprised they let me take you." She admitted, and I looked over at her.
"Why?" I asked. "They know you wouldn't let anything happen to me. They probably wanted to talk about me anyway."
"Because they know how badly I want to talk to you."
"About my dreams?" I recalled, and she glanced over. "I don't know what else I could tell you about. I didn't have any last night. Finally."
She was quiet for a solid minute, which didn't really bother me. I just looked out the window. We were going south, so probably heading toward Tacoma. It was about the same distance away as Seattle, but knowing her, we'd get there a lot quicker than anyone else.
"How much about my ability do you know?" She finally asked. I knew what she meant. I took a breath. Humming a little in thought.
"Just that you can see the future." I answered. "You see people do things before it happens."
She nodded. "It's an ability I've had since I was very young. Even when I was human."
I looked back over, now interested. I didn't know that could happen.
"When I was about your age, I started to notice things about me that I hadn't before." She went on. "Particularly, the way I'd just know things."
"Intuition?" I asked, remembering that word, and she smiled.
"Exactly." She said, but her smile faded. "It's a little hard for me to remember, but from what I can recall, it's something I'd had for awhile. As I got older, it got stronger. My predictions became more reliable than anything else, and more often than not, I was right. About the same time, my dreams started changing. Very vivid ones. I'd dream about everyone I knew, and I could tell them things that hadn't even happened yet. Nobody ever believed me when I'd tell them about it, but that didn't really bother me."
I stayed quiet now. I wasn't quite sure where this story was going.
"One day, one of the first real visions I ever had, I saw something I wasn't supposed to." She murmured. "It got me into some trouble, but I won't get into that. What I'm trying to say, is.. Leandra, I see so much of myself in you."
"Me?" I frowned, confused. "Like what?"
"Think about it." She pressed gently. "All the things you've told us that have actually happened."
"Wait." I turned a little in my seat to face her better. "You think I have a gift like yours?" That thought was almost laughable, but she wasn't laughing and neither was I. I didn't know how I felt, thanks to Jasper in the back seat. His participation was no longer a mystery.
"There's no way."
"I noticed it the second I met you." She explained. "There was something to you that I couldn't let go. More than the obvious, I mean." I thought back to that day. That felt like so long ago now.
"I waited, though." She added. "I watched. Every moment since has only proven me right. Now I'm sure of it."
"I think you must be mixed up."
"I'm almost never wrong." She pointed out. "You might not believe me right now, but think about it. The other night, you knew Jack was about the get out."
"No I didn't." I scoffed a little. "If I'd known-"
"Subconsciously." She clarified. "The same place your dreams and instincts come from. Subconsciously, you knew."
"No I didn't." I argued again, but even I heard how unsure my voice was this time. I really thought about it. Of the many times I woke up that night, one had been way worse than all the others, and I hardly remembered anything that happened in it. Why was it worse?
I'd been scared the entire way to Seattle. It could have been the fear of getting caught or killed, but it didn't feel the same way. I'd even noticed then that it didn't feel the same.
That dream I'd had before my family left. I'd even noticed it then.
Further back. Knowing when to get to work or hide. Knowing when to exist, and when to disappear. It'd been like being stuck in a never-ending game of walking on egg shells. Sometimes I'd misjudge, but most of the time, I knew things were getting tense before he was even home from work.
"There are things that happened that I didn't know about." I pointed out.
"You're still very young." She countered. "You wouldn't get everything right from the start. There is a lot going on beneath your thoughts that you can't explain. I see it in you all the time."
"Why are you bringing this up now?" I finally asked. As if I needed more to think about. "Even if I did have some kind of ability, which I don't, why would it matter now?"
"Carlisle wanted me to wait." She replied. "Esme too. They didn't want to overwhelm you, but.. I've waited plenty long enough. I wanted you to be prepared."
"For what?"
"How quickly you're growing and how hard the nights get now only tell me it's about to get stronger, and I didn't want you to be afraid if something happens. Leandra, you're very special. Something like this is very rare. The chances of even finding you were astronomical."
"Nothing's gonna happen." I mumbled, looking out the window. It made me kinda sad that she thought I had that much worth to me. It wasn't that I didn't want to believe I had some kind of purpose. I just knew myself. There was no way I was special in any way.
"I'm not going to press." She said. "But if you need to ask any questions-"
"I have one." I replied, and she looked over. "What makes you so sure? I mean, I get it, with the dreams and stuff, but.. I've never done anything like you can do."
"You wouldn't, Leandra." She smiled a little. "My ability is what it is because I was turned. Our strongest traits as humans sometimes follow us and strengthen when we're changed. Sometimes there's an ability there, sometimes there isn't, but in my case, an ability I had as a human was only enhanced."
"This is so hard to believe."
"Why is that so hard for you to believe?" She asked with a small laugh. "Leandra, you're very special in so many ways. This gift you're convinced you don't have is just another part of you. Give it time."
I shook my head.
"I just want to let you know, though, that fighting against it will only hurt you. That's also partly why I've wanted to talk to you about it. I know it should wait, but I'm running out of time."
"Hurt me how?"
"You'd be fighting yourself."
"I do that all the time anyway."
"And now you know part of the reason why." She said.
"But then why is it happening now?"
"It's not just happening now. It's only getting stronger. You're getting older." She repeated. "Things are changing for you, and that includes your mind."
"I still don't get it."
"You've always been so attentive to your instincts." She said. "Things most humans never really have a chance to get to know on the level you know yours. That in itself shows that you have a connection with your subconscious that most people never get. Not only that, but humanity has condemned anything like that. They're so quick to call someone crazy if they show a higher mental capacity than anyone else.
"They choose to see it as something bad, but it really isn't. It means you've developed something not many other people can. You pick apart pieces of a situation on a whole different level, and you use that to your advantage. Without trying, or even knowing it's happening.
"The human subconscious is always working, but you can access yours." She smiled. "It stores details and tells you things most people would miss. That's how an ability like ours is made, Leandra. By strengthening that connection between your conscious mind and subconscious one, as your subconscious is capable of so much more than your conscious. Developing that doesn't make you crazy or weird. It makes you special because you see things and understand things on a much deeper level."
Explaining it this way made me feel a little better about it.
"What about Edward?" I asked, curious. "He's never seen anything, has he?"
"Not directly, no." She replied. "But his ability shows him the conscious thought. Only what you think about directly, not underneath, but he has confirmed that your mind is a really complex place. You look at things in a very complicated way and your thoughts are stronger than any other ten-year-old's he's ever met."
That wasn't a surprise to me. He'd already told me that.
"Maybe that's why I feel different?" I hesitantly murmured. "Not just because Jack made me be."
"It's definitely possible." She nodded. "You've noticed the differences between you and other children your age, and I can imagine it's been really frustrating for you to see those differences without understanding why."
"Trust yourself, Leandra." Jasper suggested from the back seat.
"But I don't dream about everyone else." I remembered what she said before. "Just me."
"Never?" She asked quietly.
I hesitated, thinking.
"Not really." I replied. "Well, in a way, kinda. I look at things the way I would see them."
"No two abilities are the exact same." She said. "Yours is bound to be a little different. You may have more limitations than I did, but that's okay. I'm still fully prepared to help you any way I can."
It was still really hard to believe, though. My entire life, I'd been nothing. Just kind of there. Background noise. Alice sure seemed to know what she was talking about, but I couldn't just take her word for it.
It was nice to have this time to focus on something else besides Jack. She wasn't lying, though. There were a lot of things about me that I couldn't explain.
"How.." I mumbled after several silent seconds. "How would I.. Work on it if that's what it is? Big if."
"First step is to acknowledge it." She explained. "You're brand new, so that may take a little time, but eventually, I think you can learn to accept it as part of you. Like I said, don't fight it. It's not going to go away. It'll only get stronger, with or without your permission."
That made me a little nervous.
"Now, as you're probably aware, not everything you're going to see will be good." She went on in my silence. "I want you to be prepared for that, too. Sometimes, it'll feel like your mind is turning against itself, and showing you things you don't want to see." I looked down. That was familiar.
"This will be a learning experience for us too. I've never had anyone I needed to teach. I've never met another person with an ability like this, but you're not alone." She murmured. "Until we know more about how it works, it'll be pretty difficult."
"How it works?" I asked. I needed clarification.
"My gift is decision based." She said. "Meaning, I have to wait until a decision is made before I can see a clear vision of what will happen as a result of that decision. When someone is undecided, it gets hazy. Yours may not be decision based. If that's the case, your ability would be stronger than mine is."
"But I won't see things like you do." I gathered.
"Most likely not. Not until you're turned. If you decide to go that route."
I nodded a little.
"That would be extremely overwhelming in the limited space humans have in their mind." She looked over. "There's just not enough room to have anything like that come through, and the wiring is different. I can do it because our minds are capable of so much more than a human's is." I understood what she meant, and I nodded again.
She seemed to let it drop there, but I knew if I came up with any questions, she'd answer them. I was quiet now until we got to Tacoma. I filed that information away, but I knew for sure it would be on my mind again later.
I was a little worried that Jasper would get bored as he followed us from the car, but he insisted he wouldn't.
The first couple of stores at the little mall Alice chose for us weren't that bad. I liked most of the stuff she picked out for me, and I was okay with the outfits we decided on together.
However, through these stores, Alice had drifted into the dress section a little too often for my comfort, and I knew she was planning something. I braced myself for it, already preparing a speech about how dresses were evil.
"Leandra." Alice approached from two aisles away. Sure enough, carrying three different dresses.
"No." I muttered without much else.
"Just one." She smiled, holding up her choices. "Please?"
"Remember what you said at Bella's party?" I pointed out.
"But these are perfect for the graduation party." She insisted, holding a light green one up to me. "It's only days away." I gave her a flat look. Not quite a glare, but it could go there if I needed it to.
I had heard that party mentioned here or there over the last few weeks, so I wasn't surprised to hear about it now. I just hadn't known I'd need to wear a dress or even be there.
"You promised." I grumbled, and she sighed, her smile fading sadly.
I suddenly felt a little guilty. It meant a lot to her, and it didn't cost me a damn thing. She was trying to help me, even if I wasn't quite on the same page yet. She'd been there from the beginning. Why shouldn't I try to be a little more cooperative?
I whined as I gave in. "Which one is the longest one?"
She grinned again, holding up a yellow and white one.
"Just get that one." I muttered, looking back down at the package of socks I was holding. "I'll wear the stupid thing, only if you promise I get to burn it after." I jumped as she suddenly hugged me happily. I grunted a little, but laughed at her enthusiasm.
A/N: Oh boy, okay. A lot of talking in this one, but I think we got some answers, yes?
A lot of reviews are saying it's pretty unbelievable for Jack to be out, and yeah, it kinda is. I've just personally seen how someone can use money and endless loopholes to get their way when they know what they're doing. Not for something like that, it's true, but still. I'd like to have as much faith in the system as you guys have lol now, let's have a collective 'thank you' to Carlisle for keeping track of everything.
THANK YOU! To my new reviewers! I really think you guys saved this chapter. You have no idea lol so THANK YOU! AND HUGE THANK YOU! To my faithful reviewers! I totally understand where you guys are coming from.
From here, I think I'll just be moving along. This was such a rocky few chapters, and it'll be nice to get things back on a more recognizable course. I'm pretty sure we run into Jacob next chapter.
Until Eight, my friends!
