Chapter 5. The awakening
I almost reached home, when a sudden noise made me stop. I didn't know what I heard first – Alice's thoughts or the sound of her running - but sister's mental voice filled my head.
'Edward!'
She was running as fast as she could. My sister was still far away, but I noticed leaves rustling under her feets. Alice was nervous; her thoughts displayed emotions, not any specific moment. I frowned. I didn't like it at all.
Alice came into sight, appearing out of trees. Her pale face was standing out against dark night.
'You need to see this', she murmured.
Carlisle's future became clearer. At first the vision shown the things we had already known. The colleague was asking our father for help. Now I could see Carlisle showing agreement. The doctors were leaving the airport together.
The vision changed. Dad was in a hospital corridor, standing beside the gurney and examining his new patient. Carlisle was squeezing his hand, trying to pay attention. That gesture, so simple and human-like, confused me. I looked hard, trying to view the injured person.
And then I saw the eyes. Dark brown, fathomless, full of secrets. I saw that eyes before and continued noticing them in my memories.
I froze and stopped breathing. It was Bella Swan, broken, but still alive.
If my heart could beat – it would stop.
'It's impossible…'
I thought I had lost the ability to feel in such a strong, human way. I was wrong. My body was filled with pain. That pain was stronger than my sadness, brighter that my melancholy. It was living, sharp, powerful. I had no idea how to fight against it.
Jasper caught up with Alice finally. Esme was running few steps behind him. Both looked surprised and confused, and stared at Alice with unconcealed anxiety.
'What happened?' Jasper asked, trying to catch her eyes. His voice sounded cross. It seemed like Alice run away to me soon after watching the vision. She hurried and didn't explain anything to Jasper and Esme.
Alice was still looking at me. I saw my reflection inside of her head. I turned into a statue, pale and motionless.
'I know why Carlisle stays in Seattle', she explained. 'It's because of Bella. She is the patient he is going to treat.'
Her voice broke. Alice looked as if she was going to cry. Of course, it's impossible. Vampires can't allow themselves crying. It's a luxury for such monsters like us.
Esme's eyes dilated with terror. Mom looked at me. I read sorrow, grief and sincere, killing pity inside of her thoughts. I looked away, trying to hide from her compassion.
Luckily, Jasper didn't care about me at all. He continued staring at Alice. She was the only one person who lived in his world.
There came a time to decide what to do. I promised to leave Bella. Forever. I promised to vanish and let her live a normal human life she always deserved to have. I promised. Promised. I shouldn't visit Bella, whatever happens.
But she was dying… and I was dying too. I got it now. That's why that pain was so strong. It had the same power like the pain from my transformation, when something human was still inside of me. Bella's figure in the vision was broken, but her eyes still had life. I clenched my fists so hard that heard a loud crack. I couldn't allow her suffering. I must do everything trying to help Bella, even if she didn't want me anymore.
I promised. I must help. Promised… but I love her, and I can't change it.
A sudden idea came to my mind. What if I could prevent the accident?
It revived me. I turned around, preparing for running. I didn't think what I was doing; the main aim was to run as fast as could. Yeah, I could save Bella's life. Again. The journey wouldn't be long. Everything's gonna be okay, I will find her. I can always trace Bella by smell, so…
'Edward, no!' Alice cried out.
The vision was shaping inside of her head, but I didn't care. It didn't matter what she was going to see. If I stay, I'll lose precious time.
I run ahead, passing by my family members, when something made me stop. Someone made me stop. I frowned. It was Jasper. I was very fast, but my brother was very strong, stronger that he seemed. The participation in old battles gave Jasper experience I have never had. He caught me on the fly.
It made me angry.
'Let me go.'
He shook his head.
'You can't leave like this', the anxiety in his voice disappeared. Jasper's voice became rough, almost threatening. A moment – and he would use his talent, creating the necessary emotional perfume.
Our confrontation was interrupted by Alice's sigh. Distracted, I decided to see what she saw. Jasper breathed freely and took his hand off.
My confidence created a new future. I was standing on the part of the road where Bella had got into accident. I managed to trace her by using old memories, bit it was too late. I was alone on the road, looking into the distance, trying to see the ambulance.
'You'll be late', Alice said. 'It won't work. The accident had already happened. Jasper's right, Edward. We need to discuss everything.'
I still felt pain. I was lost. The vision was clear, but couldn't believe it. I didn't want believe in the future where Bella could die in the hospital.
Jasper stayed cold, Alice was avoiding looking at me. What's wrong with them? Did they understand what just has happened? I shook my head. I always considered Alice as my ally, and now sister seemed to betray me.
At that moment Esme touched my hand. I glanced at her. Perhaps, Esme was the only one person who would take my side whatever happened.
'I can't stay here', I said. 'I can't.'
'I know', she whispered. 'But you can't save Bella from pain.'
I squeezed her hand.
'What should I do, then?'
I turned into the child who needed her support. Esme played the role of my mother for a very long time.
'We need to discuss everything', Jasper insisted. 'You have no right to hurry. We all should be careful, remember?'
'Let's go inside', said Esme in a mild tone, just like talking to me only. She was still squeezing my hand. 'It won't take too much time', she persuaded.
'She's with Carlisle', added Alice. 'He won't let Bella die'.
I had no choice. I nodded and let Esme lead me to the house. We were making our way to the dining room, the place we used for counseling. Mom sat at the head of the table, taking Carlisle's place. I took a seat on the right side from her, Alice sat opposite me, Jasper – near her.
I turned away, unwilling to meet her glance. She started feeling uncomfortable, finally. I wanted her to feel guilty. Alice deserved it.
'Well,' Esme was trying to find the right words, 'the situation is quite… complicated. And very sad! I'm sorry, Edward. I hope, everything's gonna be alright.'
True pain was reflecting from Esme's heart. It softened me a bit.
'Will Bella survive?' Jasper asked in a businesslike manner, crossing arms on his chest. His tone made me angry. It looked like my brother was asking about weather forecast.
Alice shrugged her shoulders, making me even angrier. Why she can't see the fixed future when it's so needed?
'I don't know. Bella's future is too hazy. Her wounds must be very serious.'
'Carlisle will take care of her, darling', Esme continued to calm me down. 'He's the best doctor she could ever get.'
'I need to go to Seattle', I insisted. I had no idea how to help Bella, but I couldn't stay here and do nothing.
Jasper was displeased.
'It's too suspicious', he said, shaking his head again. 'We can get into trouble because Carlisle's stay in Seattle only. What happens when you come here too? People'll notice everything.'
'The hospital stuff have another problems to solve now', Alice interrupted him coarsely. She must have remembered she loved Bella too.
'It's too risky'.
Swan always brings troubles, Jasper thought.
I looked at him.
'It's not her fault. She hasn't done anything', I muttered.
'We're still vulnerable because of her', Jasper protested.
'What do you suggest, then?'
'Nothing yet', brother answered. 'We still don't know what future brings.'
And then I read all he was going to say.
She can possibly die, Jasper thought. And we won't have to solve anything.
I banged my fist down on the table. There were deep cracks appearing on the table top. Esme sighed. She will have to find something new for the dining room when the council ends.
'Don't make him angry, Jasper. He suffers', Alice warned.
'But we all can suffer too!'
'I love her. Remember that'.
Alice's tone was cold. Only now my stepbrother realized he enraged her too. He moved his hand to her side trying to touch Alice's palm, but she moved it away quickly. Alice turned away, closing from him. Jasper sighed, defeated.
Esme continued the conversation.
'The decision is made. Edward'll go to Seattle.' She paused a little. 'Moreover, Carlisle may need his ability to read minds.'
'It's not the best choice to go on foot. We must look like humans in the eyes of people who surround us', Jasper said.
I was hesitating. Alice frowned. My future changed again. I saw myself driving the car. I screwed my face. That variant didn't sound good. I wanted to object to it, but sister managed to outrun me.
'It's the best choice you can make. You can reach Seattle in three hours, plus the time you have to spend on the board.'
'I can charter a private jet', I said. I could reach Seattle much faster. Thirty minutes, one hour the most – and the problem is solved.
'You can hardly persuade anyone charter you a jet at this late hour. Take Carlisle's car. It's fast.'
'What are you going to say people?' asked Jasper. He calmed down, at least, temporarily. 'You can't appear at the hospital without any reason.'
'I can say Carlisle phoned me and asked to bring him some clothes'.
It wasn't difficult for me to create the right story. People will believe in anything if you're quite persuasive. And I knew how be convincing.
Everyone was quiet for a while, trying to find the flaw in the plan.
'It's still looks unreliable', Jasper said finally. He was calm, but still unhappy. 'If Bella is taken to the hospital, you'll have to meet her family members. What's you gonna do, then? You don't look like 25 years old.'
'Carlisle doesn't look his age either', Alice grimaced. She worried about it too, but had no desire to pronounce it aloud.
'Everyone'll be too busy to notice the stuff like that', Esme repeated. 'I don't think you'll meet too many people from Forks.'
'Charlie will be there, I'm sure about that,' said Alice confidently after some pause. 'He is quite suspicious, but he won't do anything. Charlie loves Bella too much. His world will be ruined without her.'
My world was going to ruin too. Just like Bella's life, my life changed its course in a second, and it was hard to deal with these changes. It looked like I awakened from a long dream and was looking around without understanding what's going on.
Esme got up.
'I need to pack up a suitcase.'
'I can help', said Alice. She was distracted, trying to see new visions.
Perhaps, she left the room on purpose, I realized later. My sister wanted to give me and Jasper a chance for reconciliation. I didn't want to solve this problem right now. Instead of this I rose and went downstairs, to the garage.
I'm sorry, Edward, Jasper's thought followed me. You must understand me. I have something to loose.
Me too, I thought back.
Alice walked down the stairs two minutes later. She was carrying two large suitcases. Esme packed up things not only for Carlisle, but for me too.
'Where's Esme?' I asked, putting suitcases in the truck.
'She's scolding Jasper. In her opinion, he was too rude to you.'
I smiled. Jasper deserved it.
'You're angry with me too', Alice added.
'It's not so difficult to predict it, right?' I asked sarcastically.
Alice sighed.
'It's not so easy, Edward. You can't just come back to Bella and pretend that nothing happened. What if she doesn't want to see you anymore? Seven years has passed. It's a long time for a human.'
I felt a sudden pain somewhere in my chest, where my soul should be. But I didn't have it. At least, that's how I used to think about my soul.
'I don't know, Alice', I was too shocked to think about it. 'But I feel I need to be there. That's all what I know.'
After some hesitation, Alice hastened to hug me. She was so importunate sometimes. I sighed, but hugged her back. I was ready to forgive her.
'I worry about Bella too, remember that', she murmured. 'And I'll keep watching.'
'I know'.
'Jasper won't be satisfied with this'.
'I got it too.'
It meant the only one thing. Carlisle and I won't stay in Seattle alone for too long.
I released myself from Alice's embrace and got into the car. I turned the key. The engine roared to life immediately. Alice waved goodbye.
I picked up speed. A road along the coast was waiting for me.
I looked throw the window, examining everything with a forgotten surprise. I woke up, finally, woke up from a very long dream, and was ready to explore this new changed world.
Dear readers! I'd like to thank you all for reading this story and writing reviews. Unfortunately, I can't answer to guest reviews directly, so I'm leaving my thanks here, and everyone'll be able to read it. Thank you all for your time!
