To The Morrow, For the Past
Chapter 22 – A New Uniform
There was silence in the cave. Cloud wasn't sure what he'd expected, but apparently being completely ignored was not it. He honestly had no idea what to do next – making things up as he went along didn't always work out well for him – thankfully he was spared from the decision by Sephiroth stepping forward.
"Mother." His voice was hesitant and sounded so small. Cloud couldn't imagine what the man was thinking or feeling, he only hoped that he was strong enough to get through this. "Mother, I need your help." Sephiroth continued, taking another step forward, hand reaching out to the woman encased in Crystal.
He was now at the edge of the pool in front of Lucrecia, his hand reaching out a little as he looked at her, seeing his mother for the first time. His eyes were wide and Cloud could see the vulnerability in them. The man was nervous, afraid, and looked very human. The light of the crystals gave his face a pale glow and Cloud thought it oddly beautiful in a sad way.
There was a long silence, and Cloud felt a growing disappointment in him. He really had believed that Lucrecia would help if Sephiroth asked for it, that she would speak and tell them what they needed to know. But it looked like she was going to remain silent. He stepped forward, ready to give Sephiroth a comforting hand if he needed it. Whatever happened here, he would be there for his friend. Even if his mother remained silent. Especially if she remained silent.
Except, she didn't. After a few moments, her voice rang out, quiet and echoing. "My son... My Sephiroth..."
The party held their breath and watched, waiting.
"Mother... I need to know the secrets of the crystal stasis." Sephiroth continued, voice still quiet and unsure. "We must remove Jenova's influence over this world..."
It was either difficult for Lucrecia to form words, or she simply didn't want to speak. She took her time, each sentence taking what seemed like forever to come. But they were patient. They had to be. At this point, the crystal stasis was their only plan.
"The lifestream... Use the lifestream... Surround and consume... Will to die... Will to live..."
That had made absolutely no sense to Cloud, but it was something to puzzle over later. Right now, they needed to hear everything she had to say.
Her next words were a lot clearer, almost sounding as if she was speaking into Cloud's ear. "He will know when it is needed. The white of light, the end of life. He will know what to do and where to go. He will know his journey must end."
Then, there was silence. Nothing. The light from the crystals seemed to dull. Lucrecia had said all she was going to. None of it had made sense to Cloud and he could only hope that one of the others had understood what she had meant.
Beside him, Zeke was regarding Lucrecia with curiosity and Cloud had to wonder if he'd ever actually met her or not. Cloud had never taken him to the cave, but the boy had said he spent years living with Vincent.
Quietly, Zack ushered Aerith out of the cave, leaving them to it.
"You really are her son."
Sephiroth jumped at the voice, his weapon drawn in moments as he turned around. Beside Cloud, Zeke gave a start and a happy noise and Cloud placed his hand on his son's shoulders to stop him from running towards where Vincent was revealing himself.
"Stand down Sephiroth." Cloud said quietly. "He's not an enemy." Or at least, Cloud hoped that he wasn't. People were different in this timeline. He'd learned that a long time ago, and there was none of the trust or history between himself and Vincent. But he had to trust that Vincent would do them no harm.
On Cloud's word, Sephiroth relaxed and slowly sheathed Masamune, keeping his eyes on the stranger.
"Yes," He answered the man's question. "I am Sephiroth."
Vincent approached carefully and Sephiroth stood his ground. Vincent was actually slightly shorter than Sephiroth, but side by side, the resemblance was uncanny. Both men apparently liked silence and Cloud suddenly missed Zack's ability to let out a constant stream of words.
"You are Vincent?" Cloud heard Sephiroth ask and after the man gave a small nod, Sephiroth continued, "Then you are my father."
"So I have been told."
"I will admit," Sephiroth said to the man, "That I have very little to say to you."
Vincent nodded in agreement and Cloud wondered if either of them felt as awkward as he did right then. "Vincent..." He said, partially to fill the void of sound, and partly to save Sephiroth from feeling like he had to. "We're on a mission to destroy Jenova. We could use all the help we can get..."
The offer was there. Join us. Help us on our mission. Get to know your son. Her son. Cloud could see that Vincent was contemplating that, he was weighing all the pros and cons of the idea. After a moment, the man shook his head.
"Perhaps in the future." He told Cloud, "I have things I have to do first."
Cloud could understand that. The man had been asleep for over two decades. He had a lot to catch up on. When Cloud next spoke, it wasn't to try to convince the man to join them – he knew that would be a waste of time – but instead he told him exactly how to find their living room window from outside. Once this information had been given, Vincent nodded and stepped back into the shadows.
After a moment, Cloud knew they were alone. He turned to Zeke, ready to offer him some comfort but the boy was making a show of staying strong and Cloud knew that any attempts to comfort him would break that. Instead, he gave him a little tilt of his head, silently asking if the boy was okay. Zeke gave him a single nod before turning around and leaving the cave.
Cloud watched him go before stepping closer to Sephiroth. "Sephiroth.." He stood beside his friend, looking up at him. The man's face was a mess of emotions, almost as if he didn't know what to feel. He looked so lost, so confused and Cloud wanted to take that negativity away. He didn't know how to comfort people, so he wondered what Aerith and Tifa would have done.
Which is how he ended up pulling Sephiroth into a hug, holding him close. It took only a second for Sephiroth to return the gesture and once again, Cloud was stuck with the feeling of right. That this was how it was supposed to be. Emotionally connected and safe.
They stood like that for several moments, both swimming in confusing emotions, but eventually, Cloud pulled back. "Did any of what she said make sense to you?" He asked and Sephiroth shook his head.
"Not really, no."
Cloud only hoped that Aerith had understood.
– – – – – – –
The others were waiting for them outside the cave. Zack was leaning against the helicopter and Aerith was stood admiring the view. Cloud had to admit that it was a really nice area, surprisingly warm considering it's location, and peaceful. No wonder Vincent had come here so often. It reminded Cloud of the church in his time, and wondered if maybe it was as special to Vincent as the church was for him.
"Can we go now!?" Zeke called from inside the helicopter. "I'm hungry!"
That caused a few chuckles in the party and they made their slightly perilous journey back to the chopper, this time both Sephiroth and Cloud followed Zeke's earlier example, and Zack carefully helped Aerith across.
Cloud wasn't looking forward to the journey back, and suddenly very much missed his bike. He was about to swing himself down and on board when a hand on his arm stopped him. Sephiroth was still beside him on the roof of the helicopter, and he reached into his pocket. "I had forgotten to give you one on the way out," He said, apology in his voice. He handed Cloud a foil packet of pills and Cloud realised they were to combat motion sickness.
With a nod of thanks, Cloud took one and swung down into the helicopter, ready for their return journey.
– – – – – – – – –
The ride back wasn't as bad as the ride out, the medication doing their job, but Cloud's stomach was still rolling by the time the chopper landed. He was one of the first off the vehicle, suddenly thankful for solid ground beneath his boots.
Instead of taking Aerith directly down below the plate, Zack instead suggested that they get food. Cloud's stomach really wasn't in a good place for it, but he agreed – it would give them time to discuss things and Zeke was still complaining about being hungry.
They went to the same small Cafe that the boys had been in earlier that week. They took a corner table as far from the entrance as they could and ordered. Sephiroth even insisted that Cloud eat something, even if it was only toast.
"So... did anyone actually understand what Lucrecia was getting at?" Zack asked after their food and drinks had been delivered.
"I think... I might?" Aerith volunteered, "She said to use the lifestream and to surround and consume... I think we have to submerge Jenova in mako... But the next bit... I don't know. My people imprisoned her in mako crystals before, so I don't think that she was talking about Jenova needing the will... I... I'll talk to the planet." She said hesitantly, "And see if I can get clarification..."
"But what about the last bit?" Zeke asked quietly, moving the food around on his plate without actually eating any. "That whole 'he will know' thing...?" Nobody had any answers for that and they spent a few silent minutes thinking about it.
– – – – – – – –
Aerith had been taken back home, and Zeke and Zack were safely in their apartment. Cloud left them to the show they were watching and quietly walked down the corridor. There were only five apartments on this floor, and Sephiroth had the one at the very end of the building. Cloud hesitated for a moment before knocking. There was every chance that the man was still in his office dealing with his seemingly never ending paperwork, and a part of Cloud hoped that the door wasn't answered.
But it was. Sephiroth was stood behind the open door, wearing nothing but sweat pants. It was the most casual Cloud had ever seen the man, and it gave him pause. He brushed of his surprise and gestured to the apartment, silently asking permission to enter. Sephiroth stepped aside and Cloud walked in.
It was sparse. It was the same size as Cloud and Zeke's apartment but with only about half the furniture. It was somehow fitting, but also a little sad. When the door behind him closed, Cloud turned to Sephiroth. The man looked a little puzzled but waited for Cloud to speak.
"Sorry. It's late." Cloud started, not sure exactly why he had come. "I just... wanted to..." Check on him? Was that really why he'd come? To see if the man was okay? Well...Cloud did have a vested interest in Sephiroth's continued sanity – and his mental health overall. So it did make sense. Cloud decided that he really should think about things before taking action.
"Are you okay?" He asked finally, pushing past the slight awkwardness he felt. He wasn't good at this emotion thing.
Sephiroth gave a small nod, a tired smile momentarily appearing on his face. "I think I am." He said quietly, stepping closer to Cloud. The air was suddenly charged with something that Cloud refused to believe was sexual and Cloud turned away from Sephiroth to sit down on the couch.
"It's been a long day," He carried on, trying to act as if he hadn't felt whatever that had been. No. Just no. He wasn't going to think about it. "You met your mother..." He allowed the nervousness to enter his voice then, he'd been worried about Sephiroth.
"You are worried for my sanity?" Sephiroth took a seat at the other end of the couch, mercifully leaving space between them.
"A little... But... More on your emotional stability I guess. You're my friend and... I don't know. Friends are supposed to help with this emotional stuff." Not that Cloud had ever really figured out how. He mostly reacted on instinct, and generally got things wrong.
The small tired smile was back on Sephiroth's face and he nodded, leaning back on the couch and relaxing. "I'm not entirely sure what to make of things," He said eventually, "Meeting both my mother and father was not something I had ever expected. But we have more important things to worry about and think on. When this is over, I will have time to process things."
Cloud could understand that reasoning, he used it himself, after all. He nodded in agreement and the silence that followed was back to being comfortable. Maybe just physically being in the same room was enough to comfort the man.
– – – – – – –
Cloud had apparently fallen asleep on Sephiroth's couch. When he woke up, he was still there and there was a blanket draped over him and a pillow under his head. He felt groggy, but a familiar scent permeated the air as a cup was pushed under his nose. He let out a soft appreciative groan and reached for the coffee.
It was still sickly sweet for him, but it was coffee. Ready made. First thing in the morning.
"Thanks." He muttered. "What time is it?"
"0600." Sephiroth picked up the blanket that had been around Cloud and folded it. "You fell asleep and did not want to be woken." There was a hint of amusement in Sephiroth's voice, and Cloud wondered what exactly he'd done when Sephiroth had tried to wake him up earlier. "We have a mission today."
"Huh?" Cloud didn't remember being told about a mission, and he hadn't signed up for one. Lazard usually gave them a little more notice when possible.
"Monsters moving towards Kalm."
So it wasn't anything major. Just a bit of a work out really. Actually, it sounded nice. A good way to let out pent up emotions. He gave a nod, understanding what this was actually about. There was no way that a few stray monsters required two of Shinra's top SOLDIERS, so Cloud assumed that Sephiroth was pulling strings again.
No wonder there were rumours about the two of them.
– – – – – – – –
Cloud had been mostly right. The mission was an excuse to let off steam, but apparently that wasn't all it was. Upon returning to Midgar, Director Lazard had requested an in person mission report – something that was only really done for major missions – and Cloud and Sephiroth had dutifully made their way to his office.
"Protocol required that you could not be promoted until directly after a mission." Lazard seemed tired, possibly even stressed. Cloud knew that there had been some things going on that he hadn't been privy to and wondered just how bad they were. Zack seemed to mostly deal with the missions regarding that matter and he wouldn't share any information with Cloud, stating that he'd been ordered not to.
That was fine with Cloud. If Zack had believed that it was something that could help him in his actual mission, Cloud had no doubt that Zack would tell him – orders be damned.
"Sir?" Cloud asked, still hating that word.
"Congratulations, Storm. You are officially promoted to SOLDIER First Class."
Right. They'd had a talk about that. Had it really only been two months? No. It had been longer. Two months was the minimum, not the maximum. Cloud had completely forgotten that Lazard had wanted him as a First. It made sense. Cloud was already at least equal to Sephiroth in terms of ability and strength, and while he hadn't been called on a lot of missions, now that he was a first, Shinra could use him if they needed to.
Why have one super SOLDIER when you could have two?
"As a First, there are a few perks." Lazard continued, "You are no longer held to strict uniform requirements and are free to modify your uniform as you see fit. As long as you keep the insignia easily seen." Cloud nodded, that made sense. Sephiroth never wore the full uniform. Did the man even own a shirt? "You may also turn down missions should you wish to. And... I have officially rescinded the shadow order."
Not that that really mattered any more. Cloud was so used to constantly being in Zack's or Sephiroth's company, that he'd actually forgotten that they'd been ordered to follow him around. It just felt natural now.
"Congratulations." Lazard said again, this time in a tone that basically said 'now go away'.
"Thank you sir." Cloud gave a nod and left, Sephiroth following him.
"You don't seem pleased." Sephiroth stated as they got on the elevator.
"Why would I be?" Cloud asked, "It's just a rank. I only joined SOLDIER to get close to you."
"Mission accomplished." Sephiroth chuckled, "A long time ago. Why did you stay?"
"What were my other choices? Shinra has resources I can use and I have allies here." Cloud turned to Sephiroth and offered him a smile, "Don't worry. For the foreseeable future, I'm not going anywhere. At least not until my mission is complete."
Sephiroth's face became unreadable, even to Cloud and the man gave a nod. The elevator doors opened and they walked together in silence until they came to Cloud's door. Sephiroth hesitated, turning to Cloud instead of returning to his own rooms. "And after?" He asked.
While the man could disguise emotion on his face, he couldn't seem to do it in his voice. Cloud could pick up on the uncertainty. "I don't know." He said truthfully, wishing he could be more reassuring. "But I have a feeling that whatever I intend to do, I'll have your back up."
A small smile found its way onto Sephiroth's face and he nodded once. "Unless you decide to summon a meteor and destroy the world." He said dryly and Cloud laughed in surprise.
– – – – – –
Cloud had gone ahead and modified his uniform. He added a zip to the black shirt, removed one of the pauldrons and added a small dust cover around his waist (no matter what Yuffie said, Cloud had refused to call it a 'butt cape'). It was very similar to what he'd worn on Advent Day, All that was missing were the extra holsters (he was still using the magnetic one that came with the standard uniform) and the one sleeve. He'd even retrieved his ribbon and tied it around his arm. The last difference, of course, was the SOLDIER insignia belt he wore around his waist.
"Looking good!" Zack commented as Cloud walked out of his room. He shrugged and made his way to their small kitchen to make coffee. "So," Zack bounced up from the couch and joined Cloud, "When are we going to celebrate?"
Cloud just gave Zack a tired look and shook his head. "We're not." He said, "I'm not proud."
"Huh?"
It was then, that Cloud realised just how much of his past he hadn't told Zack. "I was a member of AVALANCHE." He told him. They'd previously checked the rooms for bugs, so Cloud knew it was safe to discuss this sort of thing with Zack. "I spent a year blowing up reactors and sabotaging whatever I could find. Being in SOLDIER isn't exactly my proudest achievement."
Zack was staring at him, eyes wide and mouth agape. "W-" Zack seemed to be having trouble forming sentences and Cloud sighed. He downed his coffee and poured himself another one, gesturing to the couch.
They sat down, and Cloud began to speak. "I told you that Zack – the one from my timeline – died so I could live?" Zack nodded, "And I told you that I was an escaped experiment on the run from Shinra?" Another nod, "Zack took down an entire army before he died. We'd spent a year on the run. He carried me from Nibelheim to Midgar because I was catatonic from the experiments."
Zack's expression was grave, he was listening, paying attention.
"He was one of the best. He was almost strong enough to take out Sephiroth. And they chased him down and slaughtered him. Why would I have pride working for an organisation that would do that? And then I found out that mako energy is slowly draining the planet of her blood." He shook his head, "I started with AVALANCHE as a mercenary but.. I ended up in charge."
"But... AVALANCHE aren't... much better." Zack had a dark look on his face, and Cloud remembered something.
He shook his head, "The AVALANCHE that's around now fell. A couple of years before Barret started it up again. We actually had nothing to do with them. Just the same overall goal and the same name I think. I don't really remember. I wasn't paying a whole lot of attention at that point."
"Overall goal?" Zack questioned.
"To bring down Shinra and prevent the use of mako energy." Cloud gave a sly smile, "Technically, when Shinra fell, it wasn't because of us."
"What happened?"
"A meteor fell on it."
Zack burst out laughing and Cloud smiled as he drank the rest of his coffee.
"So you guys stopped the meteor, but decided to let it fall on Shinra first?" Zack asked between giggles and Cloud shook his head.
"No. Shinra was just collateral damage. After Meteorfall the people weren't interested in Shinra any more and a new organisation was started. It became a sort of government, but it's officials were elected. Reeve won by popular vote because he'd been involved in stopping Meteor and he knew what he was doing. He sort of became the world leader, but he still came to the members of AVALANCHE for advice." He shrugged.
"So... You're not fond of Shinra, and you aren't proud to be in SOLDIER... Why did you join?" Zack asked.
"To get close to Sephiroth." Cloud shrugged, "And I stay because Shinra has resources I can use and I don't want to go on the run again if I can help it."
Zack nodded, still frowning a little. Cloud had to give the man credit. Over the last several months, he really had given Zack a lot of information, including telling him about how he'd died in Cloud's timeline. It was easy to forget just how young the SOLDIER was. Barely an adult, and yet he was taking everything in and still managing to keep his bright demeanour. Cloud had to admit he was a little jealous.
– – – – – – –
