Sarek pulled down on the rope outside the entrance of the monastery of P'Jem. He noted the artificial weathering that had been applied following from previous records when the structure had been rebuilt. Behind where the monastery teetered over a steep valley, the trees were still young and mapped the destruction of the original buildings for many miles down. Sarek ran his hand over the leaves of one sapling spilling over the wall about him, which defined the space. As he did so, one of the monks answered his ringing and welcomed him in with little elaboration to the reception hall, access to the rest of the monastery hidden behind a folding screen. After giving a measured salute, Sarek was then guided by a novice monk, he jumped and his cheeks flushed like the dewy grass of Earth when seeing Sarek, to the top of P'Jem: a tower that overlooked the valley and provided a balanced and connected location to meditate. He had seen the man who'd sent for him there as he'd walked up to the monastery.

The novice left him at the top of the tower with the other the man, an elderly Vulcan master who had served Sarek's grandfather Solkar aboard the T'Plana-Hath towards the end of its service. There were few still alive whom Sarek was obligated to stand silent before. He waited until the other man motioned for him to speak.

"Sakal'la; I see thee has retained thy youth into your 243 years."

"Sarek; I hear your words and see thy grandfather. Come and sit." Replied Sakal'la. Sitting on a bench, he moved slightly to allow room for Sarek to which Sarek bowed slightly. The creatures of the planet moved softly but their movement was heard from the highest point of the monastery anyways. Sakal'la bent towards a sharp growl as though he was distracted but spoke clearly to Sarek as he did.

"Others may see one of much wisdom but I still see thee as the young boy who wished to please his father." Sarek did not respond to the comment. He cut back the subdued feeling of shame deep in him at the recognition of a need of his youth. Though my body would protest, I have not in these long years aged much, Sarek mused, unable to refute the words of a Vulcan master who knew him well.

"In what of my actions has this youthfulness appeared to you?" Asked Sarek, aware that there were many recent events for Sakal'la to call him for. The shame seemed to swish around in his head, chased from crevice to crook by a wilted mind; Sarek could feel the weight of the past months on him.

"It has appeared in reports of thy actions 3 days and 47 hours ago—the Legarians. A, as the humans would say, rookie mistake for a seasoned diplomat: forgetting about the curtains."

"They were new Master Sakal'la; not there on my previous missions to Station 452." The elderly Vulcan raised a hand.

"If it were only this oversight I would have not sought thee. Thee keep thyself busy; so busy thee are making foolish decisions. The Legarians, yes, but also missing two meetings with the Klingons. I heard reports of thee keeping a human in thine company for some time." Sakal'la stated without inflection.

"Only in relation to the affairs of the Federation. Our association was not one I sought." Sarek kept his eyes low though his reasoning found no fault with what he had told Sakal'la.

"Perhaps. I think thee would do well to seek out another logical reason to have her return to Vulcan with you; would she be interested in diplomacy? Her father was an ambassador from the data I could gather." Sarek raised an eyebrow. He was uncertain as to the other man's end.

"How could thee have found that out with computers forbidden within the monastery?" Sarek asked.

"Thee will learn that complete isolation is illogical; I am a creature of reason, being Vulcan. I also promised to insure Solkar's kin were sufficiently cared for where I could."

"That is a wise course. And I thank thee for thy care."

"Why have thee sent this Perrin Landover away?" Solkar swiftly returned the conversation to his previous question.

"I do not understand your concern for our separation."

Sakal'la waited some time to reply. His eyes glazed over, his gaze seeming to recede into his katra, to seek the inner knowledge of his essence.

"I sense sitting here now an imbalance within thee Sarek. Perhaps the humans and the younger Vulcans might overlook it but I cannot. It hangs on thee like the carcass of a lanka-gar." He placed a hand on Sarek, lightly but firm enough for Sarek to feel some of Sakal'la unvoiced weariness and concern. "Within the heart of a Vulcan there are things logic cannot touch sparing those who have undergone the kolinahr, and even for them I see a light deep in their katra that shines from the times of our wild ancestors. There are those for whom Pon Farr is enough to sedate, to touch upon those unreachable points. But as it was with thine grandfather so it is with thee, Sarek. Thee hath a need that cannot be satisfied by the teachings of Surak. Upon the death of thine wife, Amanda, I could not deny my concerns for thee. Then thee seemed to be focused once more but three months ago it came again; the signs of unfilled desire encroaching on thine mind." Sakal'la finished and it skirted away months of fabrication shielding Sarek's mind.

Sarek got up and turned but the space of the tower was limited and he did not dare leave and offend the older Vulcan master. It seems that I have not learned from my grief for Amanda, Sarek noted. In his thoughts, allowing himself to face them fully as he did on the day of Spock's arrival, he reached out and found the discord that followed his wife's passing had been raised again. The turmoil was not so much but it was controlled in the early days after the accident on Tau Ceti. It was in his allowing it to fester unheeded that it grew and Sarek surmised it had again in the months since Reynard's funeral. Now, however, he couldn't choke it down since the grief was tied to something else now that he could never face. He would not face just for his own sake.

"You sense my failure—" Sarek began but Sakal'la cut him off.

"It is no failing to need others. Surak's teachings would have died with him without his loyal followers, without Haadok. Thine need, your grandfather's need hath brought Earth and Vulcan closer than they would have otherwise been. Trust this need in thee."

"I will not deny the wisdom of your words."

"But, sadly, that is exactly what you're going to do?" Sakal'la countered in an Earth language he'd learned in service of Sarek's grandfather.

"I cannot fulfill that desire with Perrin."

"Why can thee not? Speak freely with one whom hath known thee since thee were merely a possibility."

"Amanda loved me." He paused over the words though most Vulcans understood that particular emotion was the reason humans married at all. "She loved me but illogically overlooked what that meant. I sensed in her a dissatisfaction at times with our ways and that she would not see her love returned. I am uncertain Perrin would not make that same mistake."

"It is a mistake she is free to make. Meld with her, so she may understand the risk."

"I believe she does."

"Then ask her to return to Vulcan with thee."

"I cannot do so."

Sakal'la considered Sarek's answer.

"Then Sarek, thee hath three logical choices: ask her, which you will not do; undergo the kolinahr and purge away this need within you, though I sense a great loss for the Federation in your doing so; or retire as ambassador and go into exile to be engulfed by a desire you will not be able to control as time passes."