A/N:

Hi! Sorry for the delay this week, I meant to have this up last Friday! So... without further ado, here we go again!

Oh, wait, I take that back... There is a little 'ado' to do:

Thank you to my fabulous beta, SueBee, and as well to my pre-readers for this chapter, StellaBlueBella & Katmom. You ladies are the best! Also thank you to the individual who recommended "Arms" on The Lemonade Stand. You made my day when I saw that! :)

~(~)~

Disclaimer:I do not own Twilight or the U.S. Marshals. :(


Chapter 4:

I never did get in trouble for the night Edward brought me home from meeting Jasper at Garrett's Bar. That's not to say that there weren't lots of questions, but as Edward refused to tell Esme and Carlisle the whole story either, their concern soon shifted from what exactly had happened, to why it was we weren't telling them about it. They hadn't witnessed the exchange that took place right outside their front door, but it was obvious enough to them that something serious had happened. It wasn't missed by anyone involved that I'd immediately gone back to keeping them all at arm's length after that night.

Unfortunately, the change wasn't easy on any of us.

The truth was that I had come to care for my supposed foster parents a great deal and they'd obviously grown to care for me. I just couldn't risk them learning too much about me and endangering themselves. As it was, Edward knew too much. He cared too much.

I realized only too late just how foolish I'd been with him. The way I behaved around him was as though I actually wanted him to break through my walls. I didn't even try to keep him out. Not the night he first helped me with my math, not when he asked about my real name, and certainly not when he put his arms around me.

But now I'm paying for it. My heart broke a little the moment he let me go. With the exception of the day I buried my parents, I'd never felt quite as bereft as I did when I fled from him.

But poor Edward...

Obviously confused, obviously concerned, and believing I'm nothing more than a child? I can well imagine how it would horrify him to know that he might very well hold this "child's" heart. So I cannot let him see that he does.

I do not look at him unless I have to. I do not talk to him unless he demands it in class. Outside of school, I avoid him at all costs. Other than a single attempt to both apologize and talk some sense into me, he has taken to avoiding me as well. I go to school every day and sleepwalk through the hours, keeping myself especially numb for fourth period math. It's a relief when Spring Break arrives and I know I won't have to face him for an entire week.

With time off of school, I have to put some effort into discouraging Esme and Carlisle. They try to reach out to me in so many ways, with both small gestures and grand. I resist. Carlisle grows so worried that by Friday I get a call from Deputy Brandon telling me that he's called my "social worker" and asked for permission to take me to a grief counselor. Alice thinks from everything he's told her that it might be needed, but she settles for me talking to her several times over the next few days. She listens to me, but eventually says that I have to try harder or there's no point to me being here. She offers to move me. I can't bring myself to tell her she should.

I rethink that decision in early April when Dr. Cullen is the physician on call all weekend at the hospital and Esme plans an over the top girls' night for us. She's invited Victoria to come from Seattle for a visit as well, and I am unable to refuse without seeming like a complete ingrate. That, and Alice's warning rings loudly in my ears - Try harder.

Tori isn't nearly as bad as I feared from everything Esme told me of her teen years. She seems compassionate to my purported situation, but she's not exceedingly patient. By the time we've finished dinner and our first chick-flick, she's taken to ignoring me. I don't blame her. I'm not great company. I tell Esme my mom used to force me to do girls' night with her too and, even then, it wasn't really my thing. I do thank her for the effort though, and help her pick a nail polish color when we sit down to paint our nails. She helps me pick one out as well, and I let her paint my toes for me.

I'm just gathering up all the used cotton balls in order to throw them away when Tori asks Esme a question.

"So, two weeks until Hawaii, right? Have you found the perfect bikini yet?" she asks excitedly.

I stop what I'm doing and look up. Hawaii?

Esme meets my eyes for a moment and I swear she blushes a little. She turns to her adopted daughter and smiles.

"Carlisle and I decided it would be best if he attended that conference alone this year. We'll be going back for our anniversary next year instead. Can you believe we'll have been married for twenty-five years? Time flies."

I watch carefully and see that Tori hears everything Esme's not saying. I do too. The intimidating red head's eyes fall on me and then back to her mother.

"Esme, can I speak to you for a moment? Alone?"

I stand and gesture to my hands. "I'll just throw these out."

"You don't have to, Anna Bella..." Esme begins.

"No, it's fine," I smile. "I need something else to drink anyway. Can I get you anything?"

"No, thank you, dear," she answers. "I'm sorry." She frowns at Tori.

Tori just smiles. "I'll have some coffee, if you're offering. Do you mind?"

I smile back even as Esme protests again.

"I don't mind at all," I say. And I really don't.

I leave the room, glad to be free from the togetherness and alone with my thoughts for a few minutes. Once in the kitchen, I hear mother and daughter talking even though I busy myself with throwing out the trash and making some coffee. Esme always grinds her own beans, so the noise from that muffles their conversation as I go about the task. Still some of their words come through.

"...you've been looking forward to it for over a year."

"...not the right time."

"... she's almost eighteen."

"... can't leave her alone."

"... just a few days."

If I grind the coffee beans any longer, they'll turn to dust.

"No, Victoria. She's been through an ordeal," I hear Esme say as the grinder comes to a halt.

Their voices lower, but I can still hear.

"Were you like this with all of us?"

"Yes, I was. But even then... this is different, sweetheart. You and your brothers all had rough patches. It was to be expected. But I can't tell you how worried your father and I have been about her. Edward is worried as well. She was making progress, but now she hardly speaks to anyone at school. She only speaks to us when she has to. It's like she's a zombie sometimes. I just don't feel right leaving her now."

Once the coffee maker is brewing, I slide down the cabinets to sit on the floor. I knew they were worried, but I hadn't realized the scope of it. I hadn't realized I was affecting everyone else. First Edward, then Dr. Cullen, and now Esme. So much so that she'd cancelled a vacation she's been planning for over a year. I press my fingers to my forehead and drop my head to my knees.

Maybe it's time to leave. Maybe the safe-house would be best.

"So you heard?" Tori's voice asks, startling me with her proximity. My head snaps up to find her leaning against the counter not more than a few feet away from me.

I nod. "Yeah."

She sighs and crosses her arms over her chest, looking me over. "So, what are we going to do about it?"

I blink at her. "Um... I can talk to her." Or leave, I think to myself.

She scoffs. "I already tried. And, I've known her longer. Trust me, she has her mind made up. She won't leave you alone here. Not for a day."

"So what should I do? She shouldn't miss her trip because of me."

"No, she shouldn't." Tori glances towards the doorway and back. She drops her voice. "We need a plan."

"Okay... any ideas?" I ask, confused by what kind of plan she means.

"Well, I can work from just about anywhere as long as I give my boss some notice." She pulls out a Blackberry and starts pushing buttons. "They're supposed to leave on a Saturday and return the following Sunday. I can stay here with you Saturday 'til Thursday. But... I have a meeting in Seattle that particular Friday that I can't move. We'd need somebody else to stay with you on Thursday and Friday nights. Unless you have a friend from school you could crash with instead."

I pale. "I'm not really that close with anyone from school."

Tori tilts her head to one side. "And why is that? Were you a loner before you came to live with my mom and dad? Or is your anti-social behavior new?"

I laugh because she's just so matter of fact. I think a real teenager would be terrified of her. I'm only a couple of years younger than she is and I find her to be slightly hard to take.

"I guess I've always been a little shy, but now..." I shake my head. "It's just easier to keep to myself."

"That's bullshit," she says.

My eyes widen.

"It takes a lot of energy to be contrary all the time. Trust me; acting like I didn't care was a specialty of mine. I handled it by acting like a bitch raging against the world. You handle it by acting like a zombie unaware of the world. Both take effort."

I sit and contemplate her words for a moment. She grabs a mug from one of the cupboards and pours a cup of coffee for herself. Before she leaves the kitchen, she stops in front of me.

"I'll give you a couple of days to think about who you'd like to stay with, if you can think of anyone, and then I'm asking one of my brothers to help out. If Emmett doesn't have the night shift, I'm sure he can do it. If he can't, there's always Edward. Can you live with that?"

When I don't answer right away due to the rush of anxiety I feel, she nods and smiles impishly. "I'll take that as a yes."

Two weeks later, Esme and Carlisle are loading their suitcases into his Mercedes while Tori pulls her bag for the week out of her BMW. I watch them hug and exchange last minute instructions from the window of my room. When I see Carlisle glance up and wave, I wave back and head downstairs.

"You'll be okay here with Victoria?" he asks, whispering in my ear while I let him hug me goodbye.

"I'll be fine."

"Edward too?" he adds, giving me a meaningful look.

Emmett does end up with the night shift the week of the trip and Carlisle knows Edward's not the most comfortable choice for me because of the way we've both been acting since the night Jasper left. Unfortunately, with all four of their "children" insisting they take their trip to Hawaii, they've agreed to our plan anyway.

"It's fine," I promise him. "Really. Have fun."

He smiles and nods. "I will with my wife there. Thank you, Anna Bella. Tori, we really appreciate you doing this too."

He hugs his daughter again.

"If you need anything, don't be afraid to call. Day or night," Esme says, hugging me at the same time. I have to laugh, or else I would cry. She's so like my own mother sometimes.

"Darling, she's fine," Carlisle says, rescuing me from bursting into tears.

Tori puts her arm around my shoulder. "She has me. Of course, she's fine."

I roll my eyes and smile. "Go on. You have a plane to catch," I say. "We'll see you in a week."

Esme touches my cheek and reluctantly gets in the car. When she's seated and the door is shut, Carlisle walks back around to the driver's side and turns to us.

"If Edward gives you two any trouble you have my permission for Anna Bella to go with you to Seattle, Tori. I don't see any problem with her missing a day of school and have notified the principal to that effect. Emmett also said to let him know if there was anything you needed. You guys have his new number at work?"

We nod and he gets in the car, rolling the window down.

"Be good, girls," he says as he begins to back out of the driveway.

"We won't," Tori shouts.

I laugh at Carlisle's face and wave to Esme who looks worried already. I force a smile as they drive away and she seems to relax. When they're gone, Tori drags me inside and announces that playtime has begun.

The week with Victoria goes by really fast, but really well. She doesn't hover. She doesn't ask a lot of questions. She just demands that I stop trying so hard to be a recluse.

"It doesn't suit you," she says while I start dinner on Thursday evening.

"What doesn't suit who?" a warm voice floats into the kitchen. I sigh and try to fight down the butterflies in my stomach. They're so bad I don't even notice I'm blushing until Tori kicks my foot.

"Does he really make you that nervous?" she asks, gesturing to my cheeks. I shrug.

"Edward," Tori says, turning to him haughtily. "What kind of terror tactics are you using in your math classes these days?"

"Tori..." I hiss.

"What are you talking about?" he asks, setting down his duffle bag on the floor. "And hello, to you too, by the way."

"Hi, brother dear," Tori says, putting her hands on her hips. "Now, seriously... why is Bella scared to death of you?"

"What!" Edward practically shouts.

"I'm not scared of him!" I shriek, spinning around.

There's this weird moment where everyone is looking at each other and nobody is saying anything. I can see Tori trying to work things out, but then she scoffs.

"Geez, you guys I was just kidding."

"Why would you kid about that?" Edward asks, looking truly upset.

"Apparently, I misunderstood something. Not really my fault though, big brother. Especially considering you've been acting like there's a stick up your ass lately. Emmett sounds like he's about ready to move out. Even Carlisle's noticed."

Edward stiffens a little. "Yes, I am aware of Carlisle's opinion. And as for Emmett? He has my blessing to find his own place and stop mooching off of me anytime."

I frown. I don't like the way he's talking about his family, and worry that it's my fault. They've always seemed so close before. I turn back to the vegetables I'd been chopping and then work on dinner for another few minutes. In that time, I resolve to do something about the situation with Edward before this weekend is up. I'm not exactly sure how I will handle it, but I know he needs to stop torturing himself and everyone else just because I have major baggage.

After a brief goodbye, Tori leaves to head back to Seattle, telling me to call her if her brother doesn't behave. I assure her that we'll be fine and send her on her way.

When she's gone, I finish dinner while Edward heads up to his childhood room to unpack before rejoining me. He cleans the dishes and pans I've used so far, even though I tell him not to, insisting that he wants to help. The tone of his voice makes me look over at him and I realize he means more than just helping with the dishes.

When dinner is ready, Edward suggests that we eat in the family room, rather than at the dining table. We eat together in relative quiet, a movie on cable playing in the background to fill the silence. I don't pay much attention to it and, a few minutes after we finish our meal, I say goodnight. Any resolve I felt to speak to Edward before not-surprisingly disappeared with Tori an hour ago.

It's still early when I get to my room, so I take my time showering and even blow out my hair with a hairdryer and round-brush. I haven't done anything of the sort with my hair in months. It's longer than I remember it being and, with the fancy products that Esme purchased for me when I moved here, it's also amazingly shiny and soft.

Dressed in my favorite pajamas –flannel shorts, a long sleeve jersey shirt and fuzzy socks– I look through my closet absently, thinking I might as well pick my clothes for tomorrow. I run to my desk first to check the forecasted temperature on the internet before deciding on what I'll need to wear, and then decide to turn some music on while I'm already sitting in front of the computer. Once Pandora loads up a mix of my favorites, I go back to my closet.

A soft knock sounds on the door and startles me. I jump and feel myself flush in embarrassment. Calming my breath, I answer.

"Come in."

The door opens slowly, and only just a couple of inches.

"Hey, are you still up?" Edward's voice calls from the hallway.

"Yeah, I'm up," I answer softly.

"May I come in?" he asks, sounding as nervous as I feel.

"Of course."

"Hi," he says once the door is fully open.

"Hi," I say, surprised to see him in flannel pants and t-shirt. It's one of those grey ones with simple black letters that spell out NAVY. He looks... really good. That's actually a vast understatement, but I don't allow myself to go there.

"So I just got a call from Principle Greene," he says, pulling my attention from the letters across his chest. "The main water line leading into the school burst about an hour ago. We'll be on a two-hour delay tomorrow, or we might not have classes at all. It depends on whether or not the county can fix the break and get water restored to the school by 6am."

"Oh, wow."

"Yeah. I just wanted to let you know. You should be able to sleep in a little tomorrow. If you want."

I smile. "Thanks. You too, right?"

He chuckles. "Except for the phone call at six to tell me whether or not to come in to work, yeah."

"Oh, right," I laugh quietly.

"Anyway, I'm sorry to disturb you."

"You didn't."

"Oh?"

"No, I was just... doing nothing."

"You look..." he pauses and seems to fumble for words. "...ready for bed."

"I am," I answer.

"So... maybe I'll let you get back to that."

"Okay," I say smiling, because he looks so uncertain and adorable with his brow all wrinkled.

"Okay," he says.

"Goodnight," I offer.

"You too, Bella. Sleep well."

"Sleep well, Edward," I answer, watching him with a certain degree of disappointment when he backs out of the room and closes the door behind him. Did I want him to stay and say something else? Yes. Is it better that he didn't? Probably.

The next morning, I open my eyes wearily to another muted grey morning on the Olympic Peninsula. I stretch and hope silently that Edward got the good night's sleep I wished him. I certainly didn't. I've been weaned off of the medication Carlisle prescribed me over three months ago, but last night I could have used it. I don't know why my dreams were so vivid or so violent. I shiver at the memory of the worst of them.

Rolling over, I decide to check the clock. I'd left it set to get up for school just in case we had to go, so I'm surprised to see it's already after 10:30. I sit up suddenly and throw the covers off, running to the window first to make sure Edward's car is in the driveway and he hasn't left. The car's there, so I turn around and listen for any noise coming from elsewhere in the house. I hear none.

That's when I notice my door. It's open 3/4 of the way and I'm 99% sure that I locked it last night before going to bed. It's a habit I've had since college and one that's become more ingrained in the last five months.

I'm immediately suspicious and walk towards it like it's going to bite me. Alarm bells start going off in my head as my heart pounds in my chest. Then a thought runs unbidden through my mind.

Someone's in the house. Someone's here in my room.

I freeze in place and look around quickly, spinning in place. I see no one.

I turn back to the door and try to remember getting up to open it. I can't, so I turn around again and go to the closet. I open it and am relieved it's empty. I dash inside and find the duffle bag off of the top shelf. It looks untouched at well. I crouch down, open it and feel around in the bottom. The envelope is still there. I exhale in relief, stand up and contemplate whether or not I'm overreacting. Peering out of my closet, I look around my room again to see if I missed any signs.

The only other thing out of place looks to be my copy of Wuthering Heights. I was reading last night before I fell asleep. It should be in my bed, or maybe on the floor, but instead it's now sitting on my desk. Which is across the room from my bed.

Suddenly something occurs to me and I don't know whether to be angry or more terrified than I was before.

Edward.

Either it was Edward in my room. Or it was someone else and Edward is in danger too.

As I think and listen, the silence in the house seems deafening now. If he were alright, wouldn't he be up? He should be making some sort of noise, snoring or something, but I hear nothing. Without much thought of what I would do if there were actually somebody here to hurt me, I step out in the hall and move as quietly but purposefully as I can. I reach the other end second floor where Emmett and Edward's old bedrooms are and pause. Edward's door is open.

Fear begins to take hold as I creep closer to the wooden frame. I think I can hear him breathing in there, but I'm too scared to move any faster. My eyes remain locked on the floor and then scan the periphery of the room as it comes into view. It's like one of those scenes out of a horror movie where the suspenseful music builds to a crescendo and you think something terrifying is about to happen.

And then just as it often happens in the movies, there turns out to be nothing frightening in there at all. In fact, the sight before me as I finally come to stand in Edward's doorway is anything but frightening.

He's asleep. And shirtless. And apparently unharmed.

Edward is face down in bed, tangled up in his white and blue plaid sheets, and naked from the waist up. I blink and watch the muscles in his back expand with his breathing. The movement quickly saps all of my attention. I can't even remember why I came in here anymore. At all.

It's impossible not to notice that he's extremely well-toned. He's not bulky by any means, but definitely muscular. I'm horrified to find that I'm blatantly ogling him. The longer I stand here, the harder it becomes to turn around and walk away. Somehow I manage to do so, but on my way out I trip and stub my toe on the doorframe.

The cry that escapes me is really loud and Edward stirs. I slap my hand over my mouth and hop out the door, stopping halfway down the hall when I hear his sleepy voice behind me.

"Bella?"

I stop and turn slowly, having no idea how I'm going to explain why I'm hobbling away from his room. Fortunately, he must have called out while still in his bed, because he's not standing anywhere I can see him. Before that can change, I hop faster down the hall and disappear inside my room, closing the door behind me.

Fifteen minutes later, after swallowing down my embarrassment for freaking out over nothing, I'm dressed for the day and ready to reemerge from my room. I'm fairly sure that school must have been cancelled, so I check the Forks High website to confirm it before heading downstairs to get some breakfast. I silently hope that Edward went back to sleep, but that hope is squashed as soon as I hit the ground floor.

The smell of coffee wafts towards me as I make my way towards the kitchen. A muted crunching sound can be heard as I approach, and I slow, stopping in the doorway to just look at him for a moment. Edward is sitting at the island countertop with a bowl of cereal, a cup of coffee and the newspaper. He's watching me too and tries to smile even though his mouth is full of whatever it is he's eating. I can't help but giggle when a dribble of milk escapes.

"Good morning," I say as I walk in the room.

"Morning," he answers when his mouth is no longer full. "Did you sleep alright?"

I glance at his face and notice his expression is a mixture of concern and something else that looks a little like guilt. A thought occurs to me and I'm suddenly in a teasing mood, so I smile to myself and just go with it.

"I slept okay," I say as I turn my back to him and reach for the cupboard above the coffee maker. "Did you... Mr. Stalker?" I add nonchalantly.

I get no reply of course, so I glance back at Edward as I pull a coffee mug down. I'm not surprised that he's frozen mid-chew and looking completely blindsided. I have a hard time holding in my laughter as he swallows loudly and tries to form words.

"I beg your pardon," he manages.

"I said... Did you sleep well, Mr. Stalker," I repeat. This time I fail to hold in the giggle when I sneak another look at his face.

His eyebrows reach his hairline and he sputters at me. "What are you...? Why do you...? I never..."

"Well, you were in my room last night, weren't you?" I ask, pouring my coffee. "I mean, I really hope it was you, but I can only guess since I'm fairly sure that you waited until I was asleep to sneak in."

He says nothing while I go about putting the coffee pot away and getting some milk. I look up when I've retrieved it and raise an eyebrow.

"That's a little stalker-ish, don't you think?"

This time he looks utterly panicked and I really don't know what's gotten into me. I've never teased him like this before. I've barely even spoken to him in the last month. Realizing this, I start to think maybe this was a bad idea. I begin to apologize at the same time he does.

"I'm just teasing–"

"Bella... I'm sorry. You were–" He stops and looks up at me. "Wait, you were teasing me?"

"Yes, of course," I say, trying to offer him a contrite smile. "I am curious about one thing though."

The relief on his face is palpable and he smiles. "Anything."

"How did you get in? I'm almost 100% sure I locked the door."

His face falls a bit, but he looks properly abashed, so I know I can't be too mad at him.

"Um, there are little screwdriver-like keys above all of the doorframes in the house. I used one of those."

"Why? I mean, like I said, I'm not really mad, but what made you feel you had a right to use one of those and barge into my locked bedroom without gaining permission?" I ask calmly.

He sighs and rubs his face, uttering an expletive under his breath. "Okay, look, I promise that I didn't just barge in. I knocked, but you didn't wake up. You were having a nightmare."

I blink and put my coffee down. "And you could hear me?"

"Yes," he answers, gauging my reaction before continuing. "You sounded really distressed. I..." he sighs, running his hand through his hair. "I got scared. I thought maybe..." He shakes his head and drops his hand. "At one point I guess I was worried that somehow, someone had gotten in there and was hurting you. I probably would have broken the door down if the key hadn't been right there."

I snort. "That's funny."

"Funny?"

I smile and shake my head. "Not funny-amusing, just funny-ironic. I worried almost the same thing this morning when I saw that the door was open. When I didn't find anyone in my room, I thought..." I shrug. "I don't know. I just panicked a little since I knew you were home, but I couldn't hear any noise in the house." I laugh, but it comes out bitterly. "You don't even snore, do you know that? I thought all men snore."

Edward's eyes grow surprised. "You were worried? About me?" he asks, surprise evident in his voice as well. It makes my cheeks flush and I look away, shrugging.

"I always worry about you. And Esme and Carlisle," I add quickly. "My biggest fear is that you guys will get hurt because of me."

"That's your biggest fear?" he asks, incredulous. "Not that someone might want to hurt you," he clarifies. "But that we might end up collateral damage?"

I cringe because it's truer than even I want to admit. There's nothing worse I can think of than the Cullens getting hurt. Not missing the Olympics, or never seeing Phoenix again, or even getting killed myself. I mean, were it just me, what else would I have to lose at this point anyway? But it's not just me anymore.

Despite my best efforts to stay detached, the Cullens have come to mean so much to me; more than I can explain, and certainly more than I should tell Edward ––especially Edward. He means more to me than I am even willing to admit to myself.

I hear the scraping of his chair and feel, more than see, him walk around the island until he's standing right in front of me.

"Is that why you refused to speak to me after that night?" he asks. "Because I told you that we care about you, and you think that by keeping us at arm's length you can keep us safe?"

I keep my eyes locked on my coffee mug, but nod after a moment.

"Oh, Bella..." Edward sighs, trying to get me to lift my head by placing his fingers at my chin. I know that if I look at him, he'll see everything I'm feeling in my eyes and I really can't afford that now.

Unfortunately, he lowers his voice and pleads with me in a tone I could never deny. "Please look at me, Anna Bella."

The instant my eyes meet his I'm reminded of the first day we met, and I might as well be lying flat on my back again because I'm just as helpless now. Does he know? Can he see? I feel transparent, like my eyes are telling him everything.

I love you. I'm afraid for you. I never want to leave you. But I can't ever have you.

Before I know it, I'm blinking back tears and Edward pulls me into his chest, wrapping his arms around me tightly.

"Come 'ere," he murmurs, giving me no option.

Just like the first time, he feels like home to me, and I relax into him, unable not to. Burying my face in his t-shirt, I draw my hands close to my cheeks and fist the material of his shirt tightly. I breathe him in and try not to lose myself as he holds me. If I do, I know I won't be able to stop. I haven't truly let go of my emotions since I buried my parents. Nor have I been able to be completely open about all I'm feeling since I came here. I know that I'm growing dangerously close to my breaking point, and if I get there, it's all coming out whether I want it to or not.

The scariest part is that Edward, this incredible man who I feel more for than I ever have before, could break me so easily. Worse than that, he wouldn't even mean to. He would do it with the best of intentions, the kindest of words, or the softest of touches. Still, I'm unable to leave the comfort of his arms as he holds me. I want to stay right here forever because, breath by breath, minute by minute, the weight of everything I'm holding onto inside me starts to dissipate.

Edward seems to sense it too.

"Better?" he asks, squeezing me just a bit tighter before relaxing his hold and pulling back to look at me.

"Better," I answer softly, surprised when my voice doesn't tremble.

He smiles and steps back a bit. "Good. Now maybe we can talk about a few things?"

I swallow nervously, but nod. "I'm sorry," I rasp. At the same time, I realize I'm still holding onto him like a dying woman, so I let go of his shirt like it was on fire.

"Don't apologize," he says softly, misunderstanding. "You've done nothing wrong. If either of us is out of line, it's me. I just thought you could use a hug."

"No," I say, shaking my head. "That's not what I meant. You weren't out of line –at all. I just meant that I'm sorry I've been acting the way I have for the last month or so. I just thought, I still think it would have been better –easier for all of us– if no one got attached."

"Well, it's a little too late for that now," he smiles.

I snap my eyes to his. "Please don't say that."

He examines my face for a moment. "Are you really that scared? Do you really believe you're in that much danger?"

I close my eyes.

He touches my chin. "You're safe here, Bella. The FBI, or the US Marshals, or whoever it is, wouldn't have just left you unprotected if you weren't."

I sigh. "I'm safe here for now. That could change in a heartbeat though. And at some point I'll have to–" I stop short.

"What? You'll have to what?"

I shake my head, not believing how close I came to talking about the trial and criminal who murdered my parents.

"Nothing," I say stepping around him. I turn and face him again. "See? I can't let you in. I can't talk to you about this. I'll make a mistake, and you'll hear something you shouldn't. And all it would take is for the wrong person to overhear-"

He stops me. "Listen to me for a second. That would be a risk for you anywhere, right? But you're not just anywhere, you're here with us. Now, I believe there's a reason for that, Bella, and no matter what you think, you can't keep the rest of us safe by pushing us away. You'll only end up hurting yourself."

"But don't you see?" I shout. "That's exactly what will happen anyway! Someday I'll have to leave you! Either someone will find out where I am, or the time will come for me to testify and face those responsible for my parents' murders. Either way, I'll lose you!"

I don't realize the words are going to come out until they already are, and my cheeks flame in embarrassment.

"No you won't," Edward insists, stepping closer to me. "I told you. It's too late for that. You're stuck with me now; with us. As rag-tag a family as this is, it's yours now too. If you want it."

I drop my head and wipe away the random tears that still threaten to spill over. "I don't... I can't..." I sputter, frustrated. "I just came down here for breakfast."

Edward sighs. "So, why don't we start with toast and coffee, then work up to the rest?"

I chew on my lip, but stay silent. What can I say to that?

"We're already involved, Bella. Let us help you. Let me help."

"You can't help me."

"I can try. Let's just take it one step at a time. Step one can be breakfast."

A plate with some toast on it slides into my view, followed by the coffee I'd poured earlier.

I feel a smile threaten the corner of my lips and lift my eyes to meet his warm gaze. I wish so much that I could tell him everything and he could understand, but I can't. So I decide I'll take what I can get.

"Okay, then," I nod. "What did you have in mind for step two?"

~(~)~


End Notes:

So... a little progress, some honesty, and baby steps. Good?

More coming soon... Saturday maybe?

Thanks for reading! -Ginnie