A/N: Hello! I hope you've been enjoying my story so far! This chapter marks the end of the section I like to affectionately call the Who-Is-This-Crazy-Man-Who-Keeps-Messing-Up-My-Life Arc!

I officially have all of my chapters laid out, which is super exciting! It's looking like it's gonna be 26 chapters with around 45k words or so.

Anyway, I want to let you know that I will be going on vacation in a couple days. Fortunately for me, unfortunately for you, I will be on vacation until the end of August! While I've been updating very frequently, I can't guarantee how often I'll update while I'm out gallivanting. Honestly, I will most likely upload some chapters, but if you don't hear from me for a little while, you know that I'm not dead!

(Also, I love comments and I don't bite, I swear!)

That's all for now, so enjoy!


"I swear he enjoys fucking with us," Kakashi angry-whispered to Iruka. The two of them were walking side by side through town, followed by the ninja in question by a few meters.

Ninja Man, because Kakashi refused to call him anything else, had of course let them out of the tree eventually. But he didn't do so without freaking them out a little bit more. Chakra, energy, the Force, whatever the man used gave him supernatural abilities. He couldn't fly or anything, but jump down 10 meters and land without breaking anything? No fucking problem.

He'd let Iruka go down first. The younger teacher had always been a little easy to rile up and was probably freaking out more than him. What he wasn't expecting was for Ninja Man to scoop Iruka up in his arms, bridal style. Then they jumped down. He could see Iruka's fists clutch onto the man's jacket and his head tuck into his neck. Honestly, the poor man was probably trembling the whole way down. Kakashi reasoned that he would be terrified too if he were dropping roughly 30 meters to the ground over the span of three jumps.

Of course, Kakashi was soon able to test that reasoning when Ninja Man came back for him.

What basically felt like free falling topped the list of most terrifying things he'd ever done in his life. He understood why Iruka had held on like he did when he felt like his heart was about to fly out through his throat.

Insane stunts aside, Ninja Man helped them get back to civilization. It was night now, and the streets were deserted. The current plan was to keep Ninja Man at Iruka's for the meanwhile.

Kakashi reminded himself that the other teacher could often act a bit like a mother hen at times. He could be a bit fussy sometimes, maybe even a little overprotective, but only in the most endearing, caring way possible. Iruka seemed to really worry about his wellbeing, which probably explained was why he was so quick to offer up his guest bedroom. That, and he actually had a guest bedroom.

Once the whole mess with housing Ninja Man was settled, he could finally get home, take some medicine, and go to bed. The self-proclaimed ninja could keep himself occupied during the day while they were at work, and they would all collaborate at night.

Kakashi still wasn't sure what he could do to help. Ninja Man had called him smart, and it was a nice compliment, but he was a Middle School math teacher for crying out loud! He didn't typically spend his days exercising his brain by theorizing different methods of traveling through dimensions he didn't even know existed until a couple hours ago.

Ninja Man seemed very insistent on him helping specifically, however. But Kakashi was pretty sure at this point that he would be of absolutely no help. But if he had to sit there and be a Yes-man, constantly nodding his head away, well, yeah, he could do that. He could bullshit his way right through this whole crazy mess of an experience and pass it off as collaboration. Sure.

Kakashi's face soured at the thought of how long he would have to put up with this absurd partnership. A couple days? A month? Even longer?

'Collaboration' had become his new mantra.

It's just a little collab project, he thought to himself, taking a small peek at Iruka next to him before looking away, just for a little while. Just until the crazy Ninja Man can get home.

Of course, that was the plan. That was before he noticed the fliers posted in all the store windows.

What drew him to the fliers was a black and white three-quarter-view photo of his face printed at the top, centered on the page. Iruka turned his head to watch as he pulled one of them off the glass storefront window. Ninja Man didn't seem concerned.

What the flyer said, however, should've made him very concerned.

"Fuck. Uh, guys?" Kakashi said, calling the two other men over to him. When he successfully got their attention, he hesitantly continued, "I have an arrest warrant."

Iruka's eyes widened and his mouth moved to form a silent 'What?' before running over. Ninja Man did that crazy whoosh-y thing and instantly teleported to his side instead. Kakashi jumped at the sudden man leaning over his shoulder, but then proceeded to show them both the flyer.


Breaking News: School Teacher Kills 3 Police Officers

A warrant is now out for Hatake Kakashi's arrest.

In a shocking development, Kizamu South Middle School teacher Hatake Kakashi has now killed 3 police officers and assaulted another 5 police officers. A search for Hatake had been occurring in the local Kizamu area after violent attacks including a robbery. The search has since expanded to the larger Kanto Area.

The police officers who were killed are assumed to have been pushed off of the roof of Hatake's 7-story apartment building. This was after responding to a cut-off emergency call. All 3 passed away in the hospital. The other 5 were discovered unconscious on the roof. The police believe that the call was an attempt to lure officers to the premises.

He is accompanied by fellow Kizamu South Middle School teacher Umino Iruka as well as an unidentified, white haired man, who is a possible relative.

All three men are being considered extremely dangerous and we urge you to stay away. If you have any information, please inform the police.

This story is currently developing. More details will come out as they are released by the police.


All three men stared at the page for a beat, and then another.

"Maa," Ninja Man mumbled, breaking the silence, "That's not good."

"That's not..." Kakashi whipped his head to glare at him. Understatement of the year? He then proceeded to freak out. His voice began to crack as he said, "All you say is 'That's not good'? I have a fucking arrest warrant!"

"Well, technically it's me with the warrant," Ninja Man said, the smart ass. Kakashi really shouldn't have been surprised when the punch he threw at the man's face was dodged by a sidestep. He felt a hand grab his shirt to stop him from falling forward with the momentum.

"We're effectively the same fucking person you idiot," Kakashi yelled, his voice starting to crack again, "Whatever shit you decide to do fucks me over too."

Ninja Man had the gall to look sheepish while he wanted to pull his own hair out. He said a small apology with a hand behind his head, but Kakashi wasn't about to accept it. Things were not looking good. In fact, things were looking downright terrible. Kakashi was well aware of the 99% conviction rate in Japan. He was sure Iruka knew of it as well.

If he was arrested and convicted, which seemed likely no matter his actual innocence, the death of three officers would be more than enough for the death penalty. He told as much to Ninja Man.

"It could be worse. T&I back where I'm from typically skips the trial and gets right into it," was the nonchalant response. Where the fuck did this guy come from where bullet wounds were nothing and the death penalty was a walk in the park?

"Do I even want to know what T&I stands for?" Kakashi asked, mostly to himself.

"...Probably not."

They were quiet for a moment.

"Well, whatever we do, we clearly can't stay here," Iruka said, his voice wavering slightly. As much as it pained Kakashi to say it, he was right. Kizamu City would be on high alert. The police knew where they lived and where they worked. It would only be a matter of time before they were found if they stayed in the nearby area. And if what the flyer said was true and the authorities were searching the entire Kanto region, well the nearby area just so happened to be a very big area.

Ninja Man looked at Iruka with a blank stare, possibly meant to be comical, and asked, "Happen to know of anybody that would be willing to shelter a few well meaning fugitives?"

Once again, Kakashi wanted to pull his own hair out.

Iruka seemed to be drawing a blank, but Kakashi, after a minute of thinking, surprisingly had a possibility in mind. His old professor from university lived up north in Hokkaido with his family. That would at least get them out of Kanto.

While he hadn't spoken with Namikaze-sensei in what felt like quite a while, they'd had a very good professional relationship by the end of his academic career. And while Kakashi preferred to study tangible mathematics, Namikaze-sensei specialized in the abstract. He would probably be fascinated by the existence of actual alternate dimensions. The more Kakashi thought about it, the more it seemed like his old professor would also be their best bet to help with Ninja Man's unique problem…

He said as much to the two other men.

Ninja Man… liked his solution. In fact, it was a little unnerving how fast he was on board with it. Iruka, however, was very quick to point out the flaws in the impromptu plan.

"How the hell are we supposed to get up to Hokkaido? It's not like we can take the Shinkansen. Not with our names and faces known like this," he said. And Iruka had a point. By train, the northern island itself was only about four and a half hours away from Tokyo Station. To get to the outskirts of Sapporo, where Namikaze-sensei lived with his family, would be another four hours. But they definitely wouldn't be able to make it through Tokyo of all places without being found out. And all of the stations had security cameras, meaning they wouldn't even be able to get close. Busses were out for the same reason.

"I'm not sure what a Shinkansen is, but my professional recommendation would be to go there on foot," Ninja Man spoke up. A silence fell upon the three of them and Kakashi tried to muster up the very best 'What the fuck' stare he could.

The white haired man noticed the stare and was pointedly unaffected. He sighed and continued, "I'm a shinobi. Surviving in the wild isn't a problem. Point us in the right direction and I can make sure we all get there safely."

Kakashi could see a noticeable change in Ninja Man. He was suddenly acting much more like what he would expect from, well, a ninja. The goofy-ness from earlier was gone, replaced with an air of cool efficiency. He was, quite literally, a man on a mission. It seemed there was a silent agreement between the three of them.

"First things first. You don't have any sort of tracking seal on you, do you?" Ninja Man questioned, looking between the two of them.

"If by 'seal' you mean a device or something," Iruka spoke up, clearly still peeved by the whole situation, "then no, no we do not."

"Good," Ninja Man said, "Then let's head out. We can camp out in the forest for the night. It'll be better than staying near civilization."


Kakashi's feet were sore by the time they'd made it back into the forest surrounding Kizamu City. They'd hiked until they'd found a spot that had satisfied their guide, which had taken significantly longer than he expected it would. He still wasn't quite believing that he was about to camp out in a forest with his colleague and a crazy man, but his head hurt way too much for him to complain about it. Kakashi absently realized through the painful throbs that he'd never been able to take his medicine for the day

It was already well into the night at this point. Kakashi figured that the sun would be rising in only a couple hours and he desperately needed all the sleep he could get. That's why, once they'd finally stopped walking, he nearly collapsed right on the spot.

Iruka spoke up. Something about Ninja Man needing sleep as well in order to function. That they should take turns keeping watch in order to make sure they were all well rested for the journey ahead. The white haired man chuckled at the notion and Kakashi was certain he was going to be hearing that dreaded laugh in his nightmares.

"My missions often include playing security guard for traveling civilians," Ninja Man assured them. Kakashi didn't miss the way he said 'played' as one would if they were simply playing a game of make believe. It didn't make him feel any better, and he was sure Iruka felt the same way. He clarified, "I'm very used to keeping watch for long periods without sleep."

He was skeptical, and he could tell Iruka was as well, but he played along anyway. Kakashi was about lay down on the forest floor when he noticed Ninja Man jump high up into a tree. The ninja could probably see the look of worry on his face, because he gave him a thumbs up with that infernal eye-smile thing he'd been doing a lot lately. But Kakashi was way too tired to care all that much. He noticed Iruka had already started to lie down, so he let out a sigh and took up a spot behind him.

Kakashi really wasn't sure why he did it, but not long after Iruka had fallen asleep for the night, he innocently placed his arm over the man's waist. He justified it in his head by saying closeness typically helped people process difficult situations. And if this wasn't the definition of 'difficult situation,' he wasn't sure what was. His face turned bright red however as the other man moved backwards to rest right up against him in his sleep.

Warmed by the heat of Iruka's body, it took Kakashi a little bit longer than usual to fall asleep.