remnants of the Past

I do not own FFVII characters nor make money with it. Characters belonged to Square Enix.

There were mountains of dark rocks, some were huge and sharp, others round like a basketball, smaller ones polished as little black mirrors. Thousands of rocks everywhere until the eyes could reach. It was always dark at that miserable place, what seemed day had a weird green light, hovering above the air. No moons or stars visible, a pitch-black sky and fogged with that greenish mist. Nothing nor no one around, nor cold or hot. Despite the desolated landscape, the air was breathable, it has water, and for that, extremely odd. How it was possible, have water and no kind of biological life. Not that he would need to feed and drink himself, but it had a lake with fluorescent water and not even damn plankton. A cold, bitter, and dark place as himself.

From the top of one of the mountains, Sephiroth narrowed his eyes, watching and hoping for any singularity that could lead him out of that hell. "Too perfect, too motionless".

The General closed his eyes. "Artificial."

Sephiroth was sure Mother had saved him from death, keeping him out of the woods, and from his enemies' views. Although, it was taking much more time than he expected, and a nagging sensation that he would never, ever leave his forced staying was growing up inside him at each day. Nothing had changed. Not even the annoying noise of the wind between the rock's cliffs, shouting its loneliness back at him.

"Mother till when will you make me wait? Why don't you come to me anymore? At least an explanation of where I am, what's your plans for me or how not lose my mind in this hell..."

Frustrated with Jenova's absence, Sephiroth grumbled and turned his back to the rocky landscape. Pacing to the lake, he tried to remember for how long he was in that sort of underworld, and how he ended up there.

Several hypotheses crossed his mind, a particular one scared him a lot. Sephiroth was a military man and had already mapped all the areas. He had trailed paths between slits of rocks, climbed huge stoned walls, and crossed the weird green lake to find absolutely no enter, neither exit, only rocks. It was not just a cave, as he thought in the beginning; it was an entire world or even a labyrinth planet. Veering his head one more time in hope of some change or explanation, he groaned in disappointment, his boots crashing the smaller black stones under his feet. He felt not only worried but also infuriated to be dependent on someone to get help, even if it was Jenova. Where is my once power? Why am I still trapped here?

Much as Sephiroth wanted to fool himself as a divine creature, lately, he was coming to his senses. That weird limbo got him, ceasing the power of his alien cells. All his powers indeed. His forgotten human side kicked on his brain, forcing him to deal with unwished feelings towards his personal life. He knew he was not alive neither dead. He could feel himself locked up in some sort of larva state, waiting for Jenova to do something or anything that could manage get him out of there.

Without choosing to believe in it, but also thinking it was possible, the truth could be less fanciful. Probably, with him locked up in one of the uncountable Shinra's facilities, frozen for tests and experiments. Cloud won, somehow collected his body, and now Sephiroth was in some virtual reality to keep his brain tracked for scientists, slumbering in a mako tank back to Shinra.

The very thought of being dived in a tank, unmoved, inside a lab caused him huge anguish, even fear. He remembered those specimens at Shinra's reactor in Nibelheim; perhaps he was side by side with one of them. It would explain the constant feelings of something being attached to him, but no visible just the clenching sensation over his skin, and the seizures. He was having so many convulsions that no way he would be alive if he were not in a trance. His body still did not belong to him, not even in that hell of a place. Nothing different from all his life since he was born.

Sephiroth finally reached the lake and sat at the shore, doing the only thing he could, contemplate at the lake and think. The childhood memories awakened more than his usual rage against Prof. Hojo and his birth mother. He wondered if they were parting him away from his alien Mother, pushing him to disbelieve her, and that ought to be the cause of her absence. Jenova gave him the powerful cells, she saw his greatness, how despicable and useless were all those people around him. Her dark energy could soothe his soul as nothing else could do, and not having her there by his side was maddening him. It was a reasonable explanation for the constant blackouts, but it did not explain where the hell he was.

However, the truth again insisted to lift the veil over his mindblindness, and at each seizure he had, those recollections turned into questions about his choices, and the ones he could not weigh in on because it was his fate to live, be a project. Sephiroth hated to know that his already unbearably sad familiar life was nothing more than his parent's lust for power, a mere science experiment to breed other ones like him. No matter who suffered like himself, Genesis, and Angeal. They were loyal friends, and because of their experiences, they died in agony probably as he would do at some point there or inside a mako tank. Zachary Fair was right, they were all monsters after all. Sephiroth was finally a successful project, he did not degenerate physically over the years, but it did not help his bloodthirsty and broken mind to heal. Maybe, his real mother got off because she knew it would happen, didn't want to deal with a failed baby.

A few days after Cloud had thrown him at the lifestream for the first time, Sephiroth emerged back at the shore of a lake, and somehow, he knew Lucrecia Crescent was close. He could hear whispering inside his mind, worse than a mosquito buzz calling his name. For years, he denied his curiosity, but that time was different. He knew the truth about his alien origin, got through lifestream, and he was still there, alive. He would brag at that when looking at the frozen woman who abandoned him for her lover.

Finding his birth mother crystal, Sephiroth stayed nothing more than one minute staring at her, but his mind already had printed the image. A frail woman, sad expression was the confirmation for Sephiroth, he was not human. He was Jenova's son, strong, cruel, and powerful. The woman he just had seen had been a mere belly rent. Damn bitch. People like that make people like him. Innocent faces full of kindness in their manners, hiding coldness inside their hearts. How could a mother leave her son away to be treated like a lab rat? And they say he was the cruel one.

Judging by what he had lived with Hojo, nothing could say if Sephiroth's life would be better or worst with his birth mother by his side. Lucrecia was the one who permitted tests in her fetus, and just for that, Sephiroth guessed her even more sadistic and colder than Hojo.

Why am I thinking about that nowadays, like a crybaby?

Hojo always called him a crybaby. Even with the brutal treatment received, he always muffed his pain in several combats and tests during childhood, but sometimes it was impossible to do this.

However, as soon that Sephiroth realized how strong, fast, and even superior he was, deeper he hid his emotions. Over the years, he became cold, fierce as expected, he would pay back all the brutality received.

"Have they not seen what they were breeding under their own eyes? Burned Nibelheim, murdered Aerith was only the beginning, totally expected as if they were not so stupid."

He chuckled thinking about the irony of having being stopped by a useless, lower rank, private. The second and third time he got it, Cloud already had Jenova's cells inside his body, but the first one was the big charade. "Who the fuck you really was Cloud Strife?"

Sephiroth stood from the ground, bothered with his thoughts, took off his coat, armor, and lifted his Masamune, he needed to spent energy. He aimed a pile of rocks in front of him and began to stab them, the sparkles lightning the dark rocks around him.

Changing his thoughts to Aerith's murder, Sephiroth analyzed it as an extreme maneuver to survive, as in any mortal combat. Self-defense, not evilness. She would kill him with her magic and he used his sword. She was a fighter and for that, gained his respect. Sephiroth knew her since ages ago, she was a lonely child so as for him during all her childhood, followed by Shinra's Turks everywhere. Aerith was tireless in finding Zachary Fair and relentless to put all Avalanche to destroy Shinra. He never hated her nor Cloud. His mind drifted away while flashes of Cloud's laughing came, happy and relaxed, and Sephiroth was a witness statement of it. Every time he tried to focus on this particular memory, it faded away.

He stopped his exercises with Masamune and shook his head. Cloud, actually, the first person who injured him, none of his enemies never achieved it before. He had the feeling of controlled Cloud in the past, but something changed their link. What was happening to him? Of course, he hated Cloud, he was the one who put him there. Shouting a war cry Sephiroth sliced a big rock in two.

"Don't be a cry baby. You are Sephiroth."

Sephiroth chuckled linking his words with his bulky clone, Loz, designed to be the stronger one and not that silly mass of muscles. A crybaby like Hojo would say. Not only Genesis and Angeal failed, but Sephiroth had also failed to clone himself too.

All his three remnants were inconstant, vulnerable, and frail. Three sides of his broken personality. He had time to build them and enjoyed their coexistence together in North Crater. Loz was strong but innocent, and Yazoo was pure strategy but a sociopath. Kadaj… Thinking of Kadaj made Sephiroth felt rage. He continued his blows at the rocks, his muscles shining under the green light of the place, hair gluing on his damp back with the effort, wondering about how he could get sweaty at that place.

"Damn you!"

Kadaj was a total disappointment, loss of time, and the real cause of his death. He should have eliminated that clone as soon he noticed an eager hunger to live and an untamed childishness on his essence. Sephiroth mistook it for will strength. Kadaj let himself be involved by the planet, claiming to hear Mother, but as well craving for affection, acknowledgment for who he was and not for what he was assigned. Well done he was dead though it led Sephiroth to other doubts.

He paused the strokes and recalled the last moments inside his remnant. Kadaj died on Cloud's arms, Sephiroth saw his body peacefully coming back to the lifestream, whispering to Jenova. Why he was not there with him? He did not remember of freeing Kadaj nor the others of their burden. He did not know if they were dead. Sephiroth assumed that with his death all of his clones would surely die or join him. Nevertheless, he furiously wondered if they were alive and kicking. Were they free of Mother or by her side, were they trying to rescue him or was he nothing, but a memory for them or not even that?

With a roar, Sephiroth turned the remaining stones into pieces and then into dust, spreading a grey mist in the air. Covered in rock dust, he abandoned his Masamune and sat on the floor. The lake seemed appealing for a bath, and it would calm down his mind of running so many thoughts at the same time. Also, the contact with the water was the only physical sensation of pleasure he could have at that limbo. He stood up, took off his boots, pants, and trailed the path to the water.

But in seconds, Sephiroth's right leg became numb. A piercing pain hit his head, and he fell naked in the ground, shouting to no one, with hands scraping at the dirt, and before it became impossible not blacking out, he saw a white slender shape coming at him.

"No, not you..."