07.05.1999

It was now Friday afternoon and Hermione had been working all week with the twins in the shop, making potions and products with Fred and sometimes helping George out the front with the till or the restocking of the shelves. But Hermione preferred the back. Where no one would point out who she is, what she's done or what she's doing working here. The twins had been a big help, keeping her away from all the busy days. Hermione was surprised that within 5 days not once Molly Weasley showed up at the shop.

"What has gotten you so deep into thought?", Fred asks her when walking into the back to get more products to fill the shelves with. Tomorrow was a Hogsmeade weekend after all and the twins needed to be prepared.

"Oh you scared me, Fred!", Hermione exhales deeply, putting her hand over her heart.

"Apologies, I didn't mean to."

"It's alright. I was just wondering why your mother hasn't shown up yet, to yell at me for being absent from family dinners on Sundays. I have been here in plain sight for a whole of 5 days and she has not yet been here – not that I am not relieved to have little more time, but it is rather suspicious for her not to come in here and put me in my place", Hermione rambles on.

She had gotten used to talking to the twins – mainly Fred – over the last couple days. But she usually keeps it to non-emotional topics, mostly on potions or on how to improve new product ideas, for which the twins were eternally grateful for. They were smart, she said it herself, but her brain seemed to be working twice as fast as theirs combined and since she read the entire library of Hogwarts – as Fred likes to put it – she is quicker at finding ideas than they are. But Hermione had not talked to Fred about the death of her parents, though he hinted to her, that he might know, she never brought it up, keeping it hidden away in the back of her mind and only allowing herself to grieve late at night, when no one would hear. Hermione was still lost with herself, but she was no longer alone at being lost. She would probably never admit to it, but she enjoyed to company of the twins. They were always fun and keeping her mind off things, which in return she was eternally grateful for. So far working together was a very good and logical solution that turned out to benefit both sides.

"We told her to leave you alone", Fred tells her casually.

"You have not!"

"We have. Not in so many words, but we asked her to give you some space while settling into your new job", he says, looking at her carefully, hoping they didn't overstep a line of sorts.

"Oh, well that is very kind of you. Thank you, Fred", she says.

"And she accepted it this easily?", she wonders.

"Course not! She expects a full report on how you are doing on Sunday at the family dinner, to which you are, by the way, still invited", he tells her pointedly.

"Well, I probably won't be going there for a while, but thanks for passing the invitation on", she says.

"Thought so, and since Mum now knows where you work and thinking that you are not fed properly, I had to promise her to bring you some food over Sunday night, so you don't starve", he says with an eye-roll and a smirk.

"You know I don't need food. I am very capable of taking care of myself", Hermione says, crossing her arms across her chest. Fred noticed her doing that a lot when she feels self-conscious or uncomfortable.

"We will see on Sunday night. If you don't want it, me and George will have it Monday as Lunch", he shrugs.

"Hermione!", George comes rushing in the back, whisper shouting for her.

"Harry just walked into the shop", he whispers, answering her questioning look.

"Ok. So why are we whispering?", she asks him, while whispering herself.

"I thought I would give you heads up in case you don't want to be confronted with him, you can escape through the back", George tells her, still whispering.

"I'm fine, George, but thank you", Hermione whispers back, turning around and walking out the front with a stack of products, already knowing why Harry came to the shop.

"Hello Harry", she greets him, while walking to a shelf nearby, stocking the products in the right places.

"Hullo, Hermione", he greets awkwardly, making Hermione roll her eyes.

"Can I help you with anything in particular?"

"I was thinking of getting something for Teddy", he says lamely.

"Don't you think Teddy is a little young for these products?", she asks him with a pointed look.

"OK. I know that you know why I am here, so there is no point pretending", he says.

"I don't know why you are here, I can only assume, since you haven't told me what you are in fact doing here on this Friday afternoon", Hermione replies.

"You and I both know that I came here to see if you do actually work here. And you can't be mad at me for coming to check!", he tells her, but continues before she can interrupt him.

"I haven't heard from you in ages and then I see you last weekend and you tell me you work for the twins in their joke shop. I thought we were best friends, but you dropped from earth and not contacted me once!"

Harry looked more disappointed than angry and Hermione can feel a little pull on her heart, listening to his words and how sad he sounded just then.

"I thought you out of all people would understand why I had to get away from everything for a little. Harry – you are the ONLY person who understands what we have been through. What I have been through in the last year, when we were on the run. Seeing you moving on so easily has left me behind. But I can't just put everything behind me and move on as if nothing happened. Things happened. Terrible things happened. Some things you don't even know about, Harry. How can you expect me to be okay after everything we have been through. We're just children, Harry. We shouldn't have been through all of this, yet we still have and I can't stand here in front of you pretending that everything is okay. Because it's not. We almost died – multiple times. Our friends and family died. It is not ok. And I won't pretend to the whole wizarding world that is it, just to make someone happy or to fulfil some idiotic duty, that someone else has decided for me. The wizarding world should know, that it is not okay at all to put children through all of this. Where was the wizarding world when things got tough? When we defended what was left of our world? Most people went into hiding, while their children and their future fought for their life. I cannot stand in front of you and make up some excuse as to why I am the way I am. I need time and I honestly fear for everyone who does not need time", she tells him in a quiet but stern voice, feeling good to get all that off her chest. But she knows, that Harry is most likely the only person she can talk to like that.

Harry looks stunned for a moment, trying to find words for what she had just told him.

"Why did you not come to me before? Why didn't you talk to me?"

"When did you want me to talk to you Harry? When you were trying to rekindle your relationship with Ginny, or when you were rebuilding your parents' house? There was never the right moment and you were so caught up in your little world, that I didn't want to ruin that for you. If you were happy with everything the way it was, who would I be to take that away from you? You out of all people deserve some happiness in your life!", Hermione tells him with sad eyes. Even with everything going on, his wellbeing was more important to her than her own. And that is when it hit him. Harry finally realised, that Hermione had been putting everyone else before herself, always. And when she was ready to be there for herself, no one else was. She was right. He realised it now.

"Hermione, I...", Harry start saying, lifting his arm half way.

"I know, Harry. But please try to understand that I will need time for myself. I need time to process it all", she tells him, taking his hand and squeezing it lightly, before turning around and walking through the back, past Fred and George who look at her with a sorrow look but not saying a word. She knew they heard, but she didn't care. Hermione was done hiding out and not making herself sound. People should know that fighting a war from age 11 to 17 was not okay. The things that happened during the war were not okay. People should know and people should stop pretending that everything was fine, because it is not. A whole generation of witches and wizards went through hell and back. Hermione can't believe that things will stay as calm as they are now, but she won't be hiding herself anymore. She had the right to grieve and to heal. She had been hiding herself for way too long, in hopes to do the wizarding world a favour.