A/N: Okay so this chapter is dedicated to my girl, BgirlAngelSpike. This was suppose to be her Bella/Jacob story and unfortunately, it has been mostly Bella/Edward and I'd like to change that for her with this chapter. I just hope that it fits alright with what's been going on. And I know it's a little fast but just remember the feelings Bella and Jacob have for each other were years in the making. They'll explain it better than I can. I hope you enjoy.
JACOB
Bella's crying calmed a few minutes after Alice left. However, she didn't remove herself from my embrace. I didn't mind, of course. There was nothing I wanted more than to spend forever with my arms around her.
As Emmett, Rosalie, Bella, and I sat in silence, I considered the idea of telling her how I really felt about her. Her being in my arms just felt so right that I wasn't sure I'd be able to hold it in much longer. I knew that it wasn't the best time to bring up something that could potentially ruin our friendship.
There was no way she'd be able to accept that I loved her right now. Not after what that asshole did to her. She needed time to recover. Which meant that she needed her best friend not another potential boyfriend.
There was that nagging part of me, though that was telling me it was the perfect time to tell her. After all, she needed all the love and support she could get. She needed to know that there was a man out there who would treat her better than Edward ever had. She needed to know that there was someone out there who was better than Edward period. So would it really hurt her to know that that person was sitting right beside her and had been her whole life?
I was halfway through a pro and con list of telling Bella the truth, when Rosalie finally spoke,
"Jacob, do you think you could stay here until Chief Swan gets home." she asked. "I need to get Emmett home before his parents get there and find out that he's been suspended."
"That's not a problem." I replied.
I took Emmett and Rosalie leaving us alone as a good sign. If we were supposed to spend the next couple hours alone, maybe we were supposed to clear the air. I hoped that was the case.
"Thank you." Rosalie stated as she got up off of Emmett's lap and walked over to Bella who looked up. "Bella, I'm sorry about everything that happened. You didn't deserve any of the shit he did to you. I hope you know that you can come and talk to me if you ever need to. Or if Alice is busy or whatever."
"I know." Bella replied with a small smile as Rosalie embraced her and kissed her on the cheek. "Thanks for everything."
"No problem." Rosalie replied as they pulled apart.
Emmett walked over next and engulfed her in a big bear hug.
"Don't worry, Bella, I won't let that bastard hurt you ever again." he stated then kissed her on the top of the head.
"I know you won't." Bella replied with another smile as they pulled apart.
All too soon, Rosalie and Emmett walked out the door. Bella curled herself back into me and I wrapped my arms around her even tighter than before. I felt her wrap her small arms around my large torso.
There was something different about this embrace than all the others. I wasn't sure exactly what it was. I mean we were best friends and had shared many embraces like this before but this one felt different. This one felt more right than anything else I had ever done in my life.
It was like something was telling me this was the perfect time to tell her. That I would regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't do it that very moment. It was a feeling that I couldn't deny any longer.
I took a long deep breath as I pulled Bella away from me to look her in the eyes. She still had a few stray tears falling and I wiped them away with my thumbs. She had the biggest most beautiful brown doe eyes in the world. There was only one thing that could've made them more beautiful, the sign of happiness and life. For at the moment all the held were sadness, pain, and fear. Those weren't emotions that I liked to see in her eyes.
I gently took both of her hands in mine, never taking my eyes off of her. She stared at me with confusion and bewilderment. I was silent for a moment trying to get the thoughts of what I was going to say together.
"Bella, there's something that I need to tell you." I began. "I know this probably isn't the best time for this but I can't hold it back anymore. If I don't say it now, I probably won't ever do it."
"Okay?" she said staring at me with the same look of utter bewilderment. "What is it?"
"Bella, I love you." I stated but I knew that wasn't strong enough. She'd assume I just meant as her best friend. I didn't want to leave any more confusion on how I felt about her. "No, more than I love you, I'm in love with you." Her confusion changed to utter shock as her eyes widened. "I've been in love with you since the summer before third grade." I figured I may as well do this thoroughly, right.
"But Jacob, we were eight." she said as she shook her head in shock. "How could you have known then?"
I smiled slightly. I knew she'd say something like that. Everyone did. Nobody understood how I could possibly have known I was in love when I was eight. I really didn't know either.
"I don't know how I knew?" Jaocb stated. "I do, however, know exactly when I knew." Bella was still staring at me in complete and utter shock but she nodded for me to continue all the same. "It was the summer before third grade and one of the very few warm and sunny days that Forks, Washington has to offer. It was your mom's birthday so she and her dad were going to spend the night in Port Angeles for dinner and a movie. And Billy had agreed to take care of you until they got home."
I could see a small smile and blush creeping across Bella's face. She knew exactly what day I was talking about. All the same, I continued to tell her about it.
"You should up at about four thirty wearing a blue and white polka dotted sundress that came down to your kneees and had spaghetti straps. You had on a pair of blue sandles with white butterflies all over them. Your hair was a curly mess. It looked like you attempted to put it into a bun of some kind but failed miserably. You had dark blue eye shadow on up to your eyebrows and some had rubbed off under your eyes, giving you racoon eyes. There was blush on your cheeks in all the wrong places and you had on this hideous red lipstick that didn't match your skin tone at all." I went on telling the story.
The blush and smile were increasing. I could tell that neither was out of laughter or happiness. She was completely mortified by the story. I felt sorry for embarassing her like that but she had to know the whole thing.
"However, you have never looked prettier than you did that day." I finished with a small smile.
"Don't lie." she stated with a blush. "I looked hideous."
"No, you looked beautiful because you did it all yourself and for me, remember?"
"I remember." she replied biting her lip in embarrassment. "I just can't believe you remember it."
"Well, it was the day I fell in love with you after all." I stated just as embarrassed.
We fell into silence and she stared down at the mattress. She was silent for so long, I worried that when she finally looked back at me, it would be to tell me to leave. However, when she did finally look up, I got the biggest shock of my life.
Her eyes held nothing but love and adoration as she looked at me. I continued to stare at her as a small smile lit her face and she leaned over to kiss me full on the mouth. Tongue and everything. When I finally got over the shock of what happened, I began to kiss her back.
I couldn't imagine anything better than sitting here in Bella's arms and kissing her like this. Sure, we were best friends and had shared kisses before but none to this intensity. It was like she was pouring all of her emotions into that one kiss and it was amazing. I could see fireworks exploding in my head and I knew everything would be okay because I had my Bella now.
I reached up to cup her face in my hand and that was when I felt the wetness on her cheek. The second I realized that she was crying again, I pulled away to find out what was wrong with her.
BELLA
I was in complete and utter shock as I listened to Jacob talk. Not only had he just told me that he had loved me since we were eight, but he was now delving into one of my favorite yet most embarrassing memories and telling me that's when he new he loved.
It was one of my favorite memories because it was one of the best days with my mom, I had ever had. However, the outcome, though I didn't know it at the time, was one of the most embarrassing things I had ever seen.
It was my mom's birthday and my parent's were going to go out for the night and I was going to visit Jacob. When I saw my mom getting pretty for my dad, I decided that I wanted to get pretty for Jacob. He was the only male friend I had at the time. I asked my mom if I could use her make up. She let me and offered to help but I said that I wanted to do it by myself like mommy was. She let me do what I wanted to and took a picture when I was finished.
She told me how beautiful I looked and I at the time, I thought she was right. However, now, I had tried to burn the picture on several occassions but could never go through with it. I had no idea why. I looked hideous and it was the most embarrassing thing ever.
Of course, after hearing Jacob tell me that I had never looked prettier made me less embarrassed about it. Somewhere along the way, I found myself thinking about what Edward would've said if I had done that for him. Somehow, I knew he wouldn't have told me how beautiful I looked. That was the difference between Edward and Jacob. Edward concentrated to much on the outside and not what was in your heart. Jacob, however, thought about what was in the heart.
He knew that I had tried to look beautiful for him and that's why I looked so beautiful in his eyes. Edward wouldn't have thought about what I was thinking when I did something like that. All he'd think about was getting my face cleaned off so he could make out with me.
It wasn't until Jacob told me that story that I realized just how deep his feelings for me ran. I had been wondering whether his feelings for me were more than friendly or even brotherly for a while now. I pushed those thoughts away though worried that it would mess up our friendship.
And if I was being entirely honest with myself, I was difintely feeling something more than friendship for Jacob before Edward came into the picture. I allowed Edward to woo me away from those feelings because I was worried a romance between Jacob and I would mess up our amazing friendship. That was something that I didn't want.
It was at that moment that I realized what I mistake I had made when I went for Edward. I had spent the last year making the biggest mistake of my life when the man I actually sat by and watched. It amazed me to think that Jacob harbored this kind of love for me after being so supportive of my relationship with Edward. It was true that he didn't like Edward but he supported the relationship because it made me happy. And that was all Jacob wanted was for me to be happy. I just wished I realized it before I made the mistake of Edward.
As Jacob finished his story, I looked down at the mattress unsure of what to do next. I wanted more than anything to just wrap my arms around him and kiss him with as much passion as I could muster. However, there was one thing stopping me; Edward.
Hadn't Edward told me repeatedly over the last year how much he loved me? Hadn't he promised never to hurt me and to always take care of me? And hadn't I trusted him because I believed everything he said? And didn't he just break every promise he ever made me in less than twenty four hours? What was stopping Jacob from doing the same thing? I mean, I trusted him with my heart as much as I trusted Edward. Was that such a good idea? What if I got hurt again?
I continued to stare at the mattress as I thought about everything that Jacob and I had been through. It was then that I realized that this was my Jacob that we were talking about.
My Jacob who had been there to hold my hand through all of the tough times. My Jacob who helped me get over what happened to my mother. My Jacob who understood why I did or didn't do something. My Jacob who would never force me to do anything that I didn't want to do. My Jacob who held me as I cried whenever I missed my mother or when I had a fight with Alice or Edward, even. My Jacob who watched me date a guy he hated because that made me happy. My Jacob who would drop everything and come running whenever I called, regardless of the consquences. I knew that Jacob loved more than Edward ever had and that was all that mattered. I knew he would never hurt me.
When I finally got the courage to look up, I tried to pour everything that I was feeling in that moment into my gaze at him. Then, surprising even myself, I leaned over and kissed with more passion and love than I had ever kissed anyone in my entire life. He hesitated for a moment in shock, then started kissing me back with just as passion as I was kissing him.
It was the best feeling that I had in the longest time. Sure, Jacob and I shared many kisses in the past but none like this. Hell, with all the making out Edward and I did, none of our kisses compared to this. It was like fireworks exploding in my head and heart. It felt amazing and I didn't want it to end, ever.
I was so happy that I couldn't imagine how I had gotten through life without this part of Jacob. I felt tears that had been prickling my vision since the middle of Jacob's story slide down my cheeks.
Jacob reached his hand up to my cheek to pull my closer to him. The minute his hand made contact with the wetness on my cheek, he broke the kiss. I looked at him in confusion and I knew their was some hurt in my eyes. He took his thumbs and wiped away the stray tears.
"Baby," he cooed. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," I replied and buried my head back in his chest. "This is the happiness I've been since my mom's murder."
He kissed the top of my head and whispered,
"Well, we'll just have to make sure it stays that way, won't we?"
A/N: Well, what did you guys think? I hope that makes you feel a bit better, BgirlAngelSpike. I'm sorry it wasn't more like what you wanted. PLease review and let me know how you feel about it.
