I feel like I'm neglecting Faye. I'm really trying not to, but I didn't know where to take her. I've got an outline of a plan now, so I hope I can start updating a bit more. Thanks for sticking with me, I must be very frustrating :)

~0~0~0~

Faye cheered, clapping excitedly as Bella rolled onto her stomach, gurgling happily to herself. She had only recently starting doing it, and the books said to make sure to give her lots of praise so she'd be encouraged to do it again. Apparently it was the first step on the road to her becoming mobile. Faye wasn't sure if she liked the idea of her baby being able to move, and more importantly being able to move away from her grasp, but the books said to encourage her so that's what she did.

"Well done!" She cooed as Bella sort of flailed on the floor, wiggling her arms and legs but basically doing nothing else. And it wasn't the floor she was on, technically. It was a long, dark grey coat. Sherlock's coat. She had liked keeping Bella near the coat so she would have something of her fathers. Now Bella loved lying on it, but Faye really wanted to get rid of it. She wanted to chuck it out of the window, or burn it, or cut it into shreds.

It had been months since Sherlock had turned up in her bedroom, alive and kicking and his old, sarcastic, dismissive self. Faye had spent hours, days even, going over the encounter again and again in detail. Every single moment, burned into her memory. First she had been angry, and then for a few weeks she fell into a lovely denial where she still tried to help Anderson and his Empty Hearse find their missing 'leader'. She sighed, picking up her daughter and holding her vertically as if she was standing up on her legs. How she wished she was back there. Bella blinked her gorgeous, mystical eyes in wonder at her mother and Faye smiled warmly.

"Do you like that?" She asked happily, "Standing up like a big girl? Soon you'll be dancing around this room with your mummy, won't you?" She leant forward and kissed her on the forehead, causing Bella to gurn and grumble angrily.

"She doesn't seem too pleased with that idea." Faye glanced around and saw John's Mary, his new girlfriend, stood there smiling at the pair. Faye nodded slowly, looking back at her with a knowing look.

"Ah, don't like public displays of affection. Just like your dad." She stood up, cradling her daughter on her hip and taking a hold of her hand as she went to grab the strap of her tank top. She had a habit of trying to pull it down to show the world what was underneath, "Cup of tea?" She offered and Mary shook her head.

"No, John said he'll only be a minute. We're going to see Les Mis." Mary explained before holding her arms out, "I will, however, have a hold of this cutie while you make yourself one."

"Oh, thanks!" Faye smiled gratefully as she handed Bella to Mary, "I'm dying for a cuppa." She headed into the kitchen, a proud feeling washing over her as Mary cooed over her daughter.

"Oh, you are just gorgeous." Mary told the girl on her hip, who seemed more interested in her necklace than anything she was saying, "John, we should take her with us." Faye glanced behind her, and sure enough there was John coming in, doing up the top button on his shirt. He placed a kiss on Mary's cheek.

"She'd just cry throughout the show. Only singing she likes is her mother's." He replied, before placing a kiss on the short brown hair covering Bella's head. Mousey brown, like her mother's, but with the hint of curls from her father. He smoothed it down as he walked over to the mirror above the mantelpiece, "You should have heard her when Faye put on some Micheal Bublé. Poor Mrs Hudson thought she'd fallen off something."

"I told you about Bublé." Faye pointed out as she headed back into the living room with her tea, "But, if you want, I'll happily take both your places at Les Mis and you can stay home with the baby."

"You should come next time." Mary told her and Faye shook her head, setting her tea down before taking Bella back.

"Oh no, I'm not becoming the pity friend. Just because the man I love is dead doesn't mean I'm going to start high-jacking other people's dates." She replied, bouncing her daughter. It was bed time soon, and Bella was already starting to get into her 'go away, I want to sleep' mood. Love of sleep, that was off her mother, her father hated it with a passion.

"I'm sure we can look after her one night." John offered as a solution and Faye nodded.

"Be my guest. But, for now, shoo. She's got to go to sleep before Have I Got News for You starts." John chuckled, placing another kiss on Bella's head as he headed towards his date.

"Don't listen to her, Bella." He told the girl, "If you need anything..." He started and Faye rolled her eyes.

"I know, I know, give you a call. Get out of here, Watson." She retorted. He sighed with a shake of his head and a tug of his lips before leading Mary out.

Faye changed Bella into her pyjamas before giving her a long cuddle. She loved hugging her most of the time. Sometimes she still felt a bit anxious, and she still had some days where John would have to take Bella for walks. But, for the most part, she was okay. She placed the drowsy girl into her cot, stroking her hair gently.

"The power of love, A force from above. Cleaning my soul." She sang gently, focusing everything on her daughter ad Frankie Goes to Hollywood, "Flame on burn desire. Love with tongues of fire. Purge the soul. Make love your goal." She smiled lovingly again before checking the monitor and leaving the room, turning the light off and leaving her daughter to drift off herself. She pretty much did, she loved to sleep. She had asked her health visitor, who had just told her to count her lucky stars because some babies never liked to sleep at all, never mind as much as Bella did. Nothing was wrong with her, turned out she was just lazy.

Faye flopped onto her chair, her cup of tea now at a perfect temperature to drink. She glanced at the floor where Sherlock's jacket still laid. She then pointedly looked away from it. She wasn't going to waste anymore time thinking of that selfish man. She still hadn't told John about his visit, and she never would either. A couple of times she felt the need to confront Mycroft, but ultimately what use would that be? It wasn't a good plan, so she kept it to herself.

Gods, she missed him. Having him back in her arms, if only for a hour or so, was like giving a hungry man a bite of a sandwich and taking the rest away. He had been like a breath of fresh air. Her world had both restarted and crumbled still at the revelation that he was okay. She wanted to phone him, tell him to come back and forgive her. But she had nothing to feel guilty for, right?

She glanced towards her bedroom. Maybe she did. Maybe she would have offered him the chance to meet his daughter. He had obviously wanted to, she could tell. But she had told him to leave before she'd come back to the flat with Bella. Because Bella couldn't lose her father like she had lost her other half. She wouldn't let her daughter go through that.

Having yet again convinced herself she had done the right thing, she turned the television on, sipping the tea and going back to her night, ignoring the stabbing pain in her chest that once again it was without Sherlock.

~0~0~0~

John sighed in frustration as he and Mary entered the flat after their evening was over. Mary was spending the night, much to John's delight, but as he switched the light on the sight of Faye curled up in Sherlock's chair once again worried him. Mary spotted her as well and frowned in concern.

"Is she still not going to bed?" She whispered and John shook his head. Around the same time she had decided to take being a mother in her stride, the same night he'd met Mary funnily enough, she had stopped going to sleep in her own bed. At first he thought that maybe she was unable to sleep in the same room as Bella but now it seemed more than that. It was like she couldn't sleep in Sherlock's bed anymore. He had suggested getting a new one but that had resulted in a giant fight where she'd taken Bella to Mycroft's for three days.

"I don't know what to do." He admitted. Mycroft seemed at a loss as well, but John suspected he had more of an insight into her behaviour than maybe he was letting on. He would normally have suggested something by now, maybe getting her some help, or at least setting up an appointment with a therapist, but he hadn't so far. It was like he was apologising for something by letting her get away with falling into another unhealthy habit. Perhaps he should have mentioned her searching for Sherlock after all.

Mary took his hand, linking her fingers through his and turning him away from the other woman. She smirked suggestively at him.

"How about we go to bed?" She muttered pointedly, "She'll be fine for one more night." He blinked, swallowing in anticipation and nodded eagerly. Mary chuckled and led him upstairs.

~0~0~0~

Faye had told John she was going to see Molly, but the truth was she hadn't seen the woman for quite a while. She couldn't bring herself to spend time with the pathologist anymore, but also had to keep up the pretence she wasn't furiously angry with her. Instead she was just wandering the streets of London, debating whether or not to actually go see her. She needed to, really, or she might start to get suspicious. They could go out for lunch, let Molly go on believing her secret was safe until the time came when she could bring it up.

Then again, she could always get into the black government car that pulled up beside her. It had been a while since she'd been so happy to see one of Mycroft's cars. She dived it, pulling the door closed and fastening her seatbelt.

"So, office or hou..." She trailed off as the car started back on it's journey, staring with a startling sense of dread at the man next to her, "I don't know you." He turned, smirked sickeningly and shook his head.

"No, Miss Newbarns, I don't believe you do."