I'm so sorry for taking two weeks to get this out! I really wanted to work on this story, but college decided to bury me in a pile of homework and it took me a while to dig my way out.
Anyway, thanks for all the reviews, favs, and follows! Now enjoy some well-deserved fluff!
Yukine woke up, eyes half-open and mind in a daze while he stared unseeingly out the window. It was dark outside -dawn maybe- but his study lamp was atop the table beside him and its warm glow kept him at ease. He eyed the light for a moment before it hit him that this was not some dim light streaming in through a thin slit but his study lamp, his study lamp from home.
He started, and would have sat up, but arms were wrapped around his waist and for a moment he was paralyzed with fear because he remembered Miryoku, but then he realized the arms were covered in that ridiculous tracksuit.
Yato...Yato saved me... His head was less fuzzy as he carefully rolled over within his master's embrace, trying his best not to wake Yato, until he was facing him. Then he craned his neck up and saw that Yato was leaning against the middle of the headboard -they had moved- with his legs spread out. Yukine was held at his side and slumped over so most of his body used his master as a pillow. A thicker comforter had been tucked around him up to his neck, but he noticed since Yato was sitting higher up it left his master's upper half vulnerable to the elements.
Yato...
He simply couldn't believe this. Sure, he felt the rising and falling of the thin chest beneath him and he did remember everything that happened yesterday, yet, he couldn't accept it. Perhaps he'd had too many dreams like this to believe anymore, but this couldn't be real. He couldn't have been saved, the pain couldn't be over, he couldn't be safe -he would never be safe- and he would cry because he wanted this to be real so badly -but it wasn't- which meant he couldn't even cry properly due to the collar.
Yukine's thoughts crashed to a halt. His neck felt off. There wasn't cold metal chaffing against tender flesh, in fact, while his neck was still constricted by something, this new material felt lighter to the point of being weightless.
Curious and cautious, he reached up and gently touched his neck. The cloth was thin and it had to be bandages. He must have been treated while he slept, which explained why there was an odd numbness around his neck -a pain killer had been administered.
He wondered if that was it, but his arm was still raised near his neck and he noticed he could see bare skin rather than the sleeves of a kimono. He rolled his eyes down to see he was wearing a navy t-shirt and when he rubbed his foot against his leg, he felt sweat pants create friction with cotton socks. Intrigued and delighted now, he examined his body and saw there were a couple of Band-Aids on his arm and he had a feeling his scraped knees got the same treatment.
A knock on the door made him flinch since he was so enraptured by his self-examination. Yato's arms wiggled a little in response, which worried Yukine, but the god didn't move after that so he figured he wasn't waking up.
"I didn't expect you to be awake." Kazuma entered the room with a silver tray that held a steaming cup of tea and a small bowl of plain ice cream if his eyes weren't deceiving him. "You've been out for the last eighteen hours."
Yukine stared at him as much as he could without moving up. His eyes widened because none of his dreams of being rescued had involved Kazuma before, if only because they were nowhere near as close as he and Yato were, and this made him consider he was wrong. Was he actually awake?
"Are you feeling alright? I came here to make sure you were recovering properly." Kazuma's friendly smile fell flat at the mention of his injuries. Though he maintained his outer calm as he walked over to set the tray by his lamp.
Yukine blinked and Kazuma stood at attention while patiently awaiting his response.
"I..." He couldn't go on because his eyebrows jumped high when the expected pain of a swollen throat did not sting him. He brought his hands to his neck but Kazuma was watching him, so he got a hold of himself. "I'm fine." He whispered in a slightly raspy voice, shock etched into his face.
Kazuma smiled more naturally. "I'm glad you're feeling better. We got some fluids in you while you were out but it would be best if you hydrate yourself once I'm done giving you a quick check-up."
He heard Kazuma, but hadn't been listening as the non-swollen state of his throat held his full attention. Not even his best dreams had allowed him to escape from his swollen throat or the weighty metal confining his neck. This was truly happening, wasn't it?
Without thinking, a question tumbled out his mouth. "How did you get the-um, the..." He couldn't admit it was a collar. It made him sound like some animal or pet and the shame it brought him glued his mouth shut.
Thankfully Kazuma had noticed how his fingers twitched towards his neck and his lips became a grim line. "That device around your neck was banned nearly a century ago."
His forehead furrowed at that because it never occurred to him that thing was so old. "You know what it was? And who made it?"
"Yes," Kazuma said monotone and maybe he did that on purpose because Yukine probably looked stricken by the fact that the dreadful device had been around for so long. "When you're my age, you watch a lot of fads come and go. That device was a part of one of those fads." He paused to assess Yukine's mental state, and seeing he was relatively calm, continued. "I believe some god invented them as a preemptive strike against shinki that blighted their masters."
"What?!" He couldn't hold in the cry and he hated himself for expecting to be shocked for that. However, Yato merely mumbled an indiscernible phrase and twitched while Kazuma remained impassive.
"It wasn't used the same way it is today." Kazuma quickly assured him. "For one, the shinki wore them willingly. Second, the shocks were at such a low voltage they could never have caused such damage." He didn't gesture to Yukine's neck, it was clear he was referencing it. "And masters only shocked a shinki if they blighted them, to help them learn to control themselves before they became ayakashi or had to be released."
"Oh," Yukine's gaze fell down, contemplating this new information. "So someone decided to ignore the ban and altered the coll-device's original use."
"Exactly." Kazuma held appreciation, perhaps grateful he didn't have to explain everything for once, in the green of his eyes. "They misused it for their own gain." The ire, though no more than a speck, on his face surprised Yukine because the older regalia was always so in control of himself. Then again, Kazuma was a blessed regalia himself and likely felt personally tied to the situation.
Though the ire was quickly replaced with a tight smile. "That's done with. I should check your bandages before your tea gets cold and the ice cream melts."
Yukine had more questions, but figured they could wait till this examination was over. Plus he wanted some time to mull over what he had been told.
He sat up slowly and tried to lift Yato's arm away. However, the second he nudged it, the arm reeled him in tighter against his master's side and he fell back onto Yato, practically sitting in his lap.
Kazuma blinked, taken aback, but before either of them could try again, Yato began to mummer. "No...touch...not my baby..."
Yukine felt the blush tint his cheeks a pale pink, which darkened when Yato also nuzzled his shoulder.
He silently hoped Kazuma wouldn't figure it out, but when he looked over, the older shinki had amusement lighting his eyes. Yukine's face grew baking hot and he wondered if Yato was doing this on purpose, but his breathing was deep and his eyes remained shut.
"Well, I suppose he can check your bandages himself once he wakes up." Kazuma's gaze shifted beyond Yukine and towards Yato while his expression became sympathetic. "I'm glad he's finally getting some sleep."
Yukine felt a hand clench around his heart as he understood the implication. Yato hadn't been sleeping because of him.
He peered up at Yato and only now did he see the black smudges under his eyes, the unhealthy parlor of his skin, and how his hair was not merely messy but greasy in a way Yato never allowed it to get even when he had lived on the streets. There was even what looked like bandages peeking out from under the collar of his tracksuit.
"Yato." He whispered to himself because his master looked completely wrung out. He hadn't noticed when he first saw him likely because he had been blinded by his joy and because Yato's overwhelming presence had masked his exhaustion. Only now did he recall the whole reason he had worried about his master's wellbeing without him. Masuta had been hunting Yato down, perhaps even fought him a few times for who knew how many weeks.
"Kazuma," He got the shinki's attention who had been observing him and his master in silence.
"Yes?"
"How long was I gone?" He forced the question off his lead tongue.
Kazuma didn't immediately reply and his heart beat faster and faster as the seconds ticked and ticked.
"Not counting today," Kazuma turned to stare out the window, but Yukine could see his reflection in the glass and saw how grim he looked. "You went missing about nineteen days ago."
He didn't know how to feel about that, a numbness had taken residence under his skin the second he heard the number so perhaps he was simply in shock. Without emotions impacting him, Yukine plainly thought that explained why he had been so broken by auction day. He'd been isolated and mistreated for over two weeks. He had been denied the right to be treated like a human being for nearly three.
"He's been driving himself ragged searching for you," Kazuma turned to regard Yukine but there was no accusation in his tone, though he figured there should be because he had failed Yato. "We couldn't stop him most days."
"He got all of you to look for me? Even Bishamon?" He couldn't wrap his head around Yato ever begging Bishamon for help with such a personal matter.
Kazuma gave him a peculiar look, one he couldn't decipher except to say it was under the umbrella of sadness. The regalia shook his head so brown bangs swayed. "He didn't have to. The second he went back to Kofuku's place, and they realized what happened, Daikoku and Kofuku offered to search for you. Then Bishamon and Tenjin learned about it from Hiyori because they were wondering why she was running around so late."
Yukine's eyes expanded with every sentence and he had to look shell-shocked because he felt like a brick wall had collapsed onto him. He had never entertained the possibility that anyone but Yato and Hiyori -maybe Kofuku and Daikoku too- had been searching for him.
"Yukine," Kazuma was smiling with an odd mixture of pity and amusement. "You have a lot of friends," He looked over to Yukine's god. "Yato isn't as alone as he used to be either, but I don't think he realizes it. I guess you two have that in common."
He turned up his neck towards Yato while stretching his dry lips into a thin, tiny grin. "I guess I have to thank him for being so persistent..." The side of his lip went up higher. "Or maybe he's so annoying nobody wanted to hear him moping if they didn't help him."
"I must admit he can be vexing," The two shinki shared a look in a moment of understanding.
"Not you too, Kazuma," A tired and slurred drawl derived from above his head and he looked up. "Yukine insulting me is bad enough." Yato scrubbed at his groggy eyes. Soon, though, his eyes slid down to Yukine and he and his master shared a long look.
Yukine wasn't quite sure how he felt, everything had happened so suddenly he still wasn't certain any of this was as real as he hoped it was. Though maybe his master was just as mixed up inside because his eyes were distant and cloudy as if he were lost in thought.
"Since you wouldn't let me check his wounds, I'll leave that to you, Yato." Kazuma interrupted their staring contest smoothly. Then just as easily he slipped out the room. Though Yukine caught him giving Yato a look, which his master nodded to before the regalia went out the door.
He was going to question this when Yato shined a smile his way. "Hey, food!" His master straightened and pulled him all the way onto his lap, much to his embarrassment, while encircling him with one arm and using the other to drag the tray over. "Now what do we have here?" He made a show of looking over the tea and ice cream before making a decision. "Blegh, none of this is good. Guess you can have it all to yourself." He smiled down at him, loosening his hold so Yukine had free reign with his arms.
He figured Yato was playing it up if only to lighten the mood and Yukine wanted to smile or thank him except he hadn't done either of those for weeks so he couldn't muster the will to do either one. Though the tea looked divine in his eyes since the last thing he had drunk had been plain tap water and that had been ages ago.
He lifted up the cup and his hands shook, but the cup was not filled too high so none of it spilled. He brought it to his lips and sipped it with extreme care because he could feel Yato watching him like a hawk and he didn't want his master to think he was completely useless on his own. However, he forgot about this as mint slid down his tongue and throat. He felt like he was going to melt into a pile of goo as the hot -but not too hot- liquid refreshed his mouth as if it were its own form of balm.
"You okay?" Yato's soft question interrupted his peace, and he realized he had froze after taking that first sip. He flushed because it was simply some mint tea, and here he had treated it like a rare mineral.
To cover up his blush, he took another sip so he wouldn't have to talk and shook his head in the affirmative. Thankfully Yato didn't interrupt until Yukine had drained the cup to its last drop and had returned it to the tray. He eyed the melting ice cream but the thought of eating such a sugary treat made him uncomfortable.
"Feeling better?"
Yukine looked up to his master and saw that he appeared to be a bit distressed and his forehead was furrowed like he had a question.
"What is it?" He asked, not liking how tense the silence was becoming.
Yato bit his lip for a second and his gaze flew upwards as he pondered over something. However, he soon sighed and in a low, reluctant tone he spoke. "I know it's soon," he tensed a little against Yato, knowing he might not like where this was heading. Yet Yato paused, probably noting how he'd accidently shattered his inner tranquility. "Actually, it can w-"
"Go ahead." He cut Yato off because his master wouldn't sound like this if it weren't important and he didn't want to spend the rest of the day beating around the bush.
Yato eyed him and Yukine tried to smile. He was pretty sure he failed since Yato still looked reluctant as he went on. "Kazuma wants to make sure we shouldn't be treating any...other injuries on you."
Yukine was puzzled by his wording and the meaning was lost on him, which is why Yato continued. "What I mean is...did anyone touch you?"
He choked on air for a second, but then he quickly shook his head. "N-No!" He didn't want to think about it, but Miryoku's face and those eyes and his hands were already forcing their way into his mind. "What y-you saw with M-Miryoku was the closest."
He felt a shiver roll down his spine because Miryoku had nearly been his master and the idea of living with such a creep made him want to hold himself, but he didn't because Yato would worry.
"I should have killed him."
He looked up and saw a flash of Yato's thunderous expression but it soon dispersed after he took a calming deep breath. Quieter, he looked down at Yukine and his eyes were soft as he said, "You're safe now."
Yukine didn't hold his gaze because there was so much care held in those eyes and he wasn't worthy of it, so he turned to the window. The sun was breaking into the horizon and the sky was so many shades of deep purple and orange that he was awed by it. "Yeah, I know." He muttered, but already he felt a dam breaking within his chest because he hadn't seen a sunrise for nearly three weeks and he might never have seen this beauty again if it hadn't been for everybody.
Yato didn't say a word when he started to sniffle and a couple of tears leaked out, though, no more than that. The sun touched his face and it felt warm in a way no manufactured light could. He used to dream about things like this, so could it truly be real?
Yato made a choked sound and Yukine realized he had spoken aloud. Ashamed he had let such weakness slip out, he burrowed his face into Yato's side and tried to hide it.
A hand landed softly upon his head. "Don't worry, this is real. I promise it's real." Yato ran his fingers through his blond tufts and Yukine finally allowed himself to believe that he was truly going home.
He woke up like he fell asleep, to the feeling of fingers combing through his hair and an arm wrapped around his middle. He was only partially awake, and thus, didn't try to move while he idly wondered if he had taken a power nap or fell into another lengthy sleep. He assumed the latter since he felt his body was in a different position -he was sitting up more- and voices were murmuring above him.
"-the tape. Nothing at all?" His master's voice was hardly above a whisper. He felt every word as his head rested once again against Yato's chest, for apparently he was still in Yato's lap. He should have been embarrassed, yet was perfectly content because it was warm unlike the chilly cell he had been left in.
"No, nothing from what we can tell." Kazuma's voice drifted from somewhere in front, calm and steady in a way that made the lull to sleep renew in Yukine.
"Good... Not that I thought my kid was a liar, but they could have taken advantage of him when he was sleeping... I had to make sure."
He became more alert as he noticed he was the topic being discussed. But what tapes were they talking about?
He didn't really have it in him to ponder the questions. Maybe he was being self-indulgent and lazy or he was still recovering from what he had been through, but he had no desire to leave his warm nest and he was already dipping back into unconsciousness.
"Mind letting me watch the tapes? I don't need to see all of them, just the ones with Yukine in them."
His muscles tensed and he heard the clacking of teeth above like Yato had clenched his jaw. An explanation suddenly sprung into his head, and he didn't like it.
In that cell and the rest of the building he had felt like he was being watched. He had suspected there were cameras from the very start and if Yato was talking about tapes with him in it...
The fingers stopped and the hand pulled away. He immediately knew Yato had picked up on his anxiety and rushed to calm himself.
"What's wrong?" Kazuma asked, no doubt seeing Yato's attention had turned towards his shinki. He felt Yato's eyes scanning him over, and fought to keep his breathing deep and his expression neutral.
His heartbeat picked up regardless of his wishes as Yato said nothing. He didn't want them to realize he was awake because he needed to know exactly what Yato would see on those tapes. Only a few days' worth? Or weeks? Only his time in the cell or the auction too? Would his master see how he failed him? How he let Masuta treat him like a dog over a cup of water?
His heart was ready to burst because no one was saying anything until finally Yato spoke. "Don't worry, you're safe now, Yukine. It's okay, you're okay." The hand returned to his head and continued its rhythmic petting. Not like Masuta, not like Yato was giving his pet a treat, but tender and slow as if Yato were savoring the physical connection. Had he missed this like Yukine had?
"Was he having a nightmare?" Kazuma sounded closer, prepared to offer his assistance.
He knew Yato's nodded because his chin gave him a light tap on his shoulder. "I think so, but he's calming down."
"Has he had a lot of them?"
"No, this is the first time."
Thee scrutiny was off himself so his body loosened.
"But this only proves my point. I need to see those tapes so I can figure out how to help him."
"Why not ask him what happened?"
Horror dug its claws into his bones and he struggled to maintain a facade of calm. He couldn't handle that. Just imagining Yato asking and making him admit how he broke down and obeyed Masuta as if he were his god rather than Yato had bile rising in the back of his throat.
"I won't put him through that." Yato's reply tore the worry from his heart.
"He's already had to go through it once and I won't make him relive it. Ever." His tone dared anyone to challenge his decision, but he heard Kazuma sigh and knew it wouldn't lead to an argument.
"Are you sure you're doing this for Yukine? Or are you from your own guilt that persists despite how Yukine is clearly happy to be with you, and doesn't blame you for any of this, which makes sense because it is not your fault."
His mood swung down low because Yato was blaming himself for Yukine's failings, and according to the exasperation dripping from Kazuma's tone, this was an old argument.
Guilt squirmed in the pit of his stomach because he had been troubling his master not only with his own negative emotions but had also made Yato feel negative about himself.
The hand stopped and merely rested on his head and he fought against the urge to stiffen because Yato released a mirthless chuckle. "That's because Yukine is too good...too pure for that. Even with a lousy master and all the trouble I cause him, he doesn't have it in him to hate me."
The tension in the room was colligating and he couldn't help but stiffen because Yato was holding him a little too tight now.
"Yato-"
"Sometimes I wonder if he'd be better off with someone else. I know he wouldn't like it, but if I released him and sent him to someone like Ebisu or Tenjin..."
His heart stopped.
His breathing cut off entirely.
Because Yato didn't want him, had just openly admitted to not wanting him, and Yukine was going to be sold by his own master and how could he do this?!
"No!" Yukine's eyes flashed open and he saw his master's surprise before he flung himself out of his lap and landed near the edge of the mattress.
Yato was gaping at him. "Y-Yuki-"
"You promised you wouldn't! You promised!" His throat throbbed because he was screaming and tears were spilling out in a sudden violent eruption.
Yato tried reaching for him, shouting something out, but Yukine leaned away and would not listen because they were lies! His master was a liar! Liar! Liar!
Arms grabbed him around his waist and yanked him off the bed. Then he was no longer in the bedroom, he was on that stage and Miryoku was dragging him away from Yato and he couldn't get free and he didn't want to go!
He screamed for help and writhed with everything he had because he couldn't let him take him away from Yato. No, no, no!
"Hold him! I can't put him to sleep like this!"
Yukine panicked and threw out his legs until it hit something solid and he heard something shatter yet he didn't care because Masuta was going to have his regalia put him to sleep. Then couldn't escape and he would be trapped forever and ever.
"Wait!"
Hands tore him from Miryoku's arms and shoved his face into a thin torso while trapping him in a crushing embrace. He struggled on instinct and tried to free a hand so he could get a borderline before they shocked him-
"Yukine!" His master's voice broke through his hysteria and he cut off the "don't release me, don't release me, please, don't" streaming out his mouth because maybe if he showed he was obedient Yato wouldn't sell him.
"Look at me!"
He didn't recall shutting his eyes, however, he suddenly noticed it was all dark so he snapped them open. He only saw skin meeting a tracksuit until a palm grasped his chin and turned it upward.
Yato's eyes were shimmering and he saw a desperate plea swimming in his ocean blues. "I am not selling you. I would never sell you." He sounded heartbroken and pained, but there was no hesitation or signs of lying on his face.
Yukine's struggling receded because Yato was upset and it was his fault. He simply couldn't stop messing up. "I...I'm..." He struggled to get an apology out, however, his healing throat was agitated and he was still crying so it came out as meek blubbering.
Yato shushed him before he could try again. "Didn't you hear me yesterday? I'm never letting you go."
Yukine's chest rose and fell in a frenzy, but his mind recognized how Yato had made a promise to him. He wasn't being sold, why had he thought that? It was ridiculous. Yato was a great master and he was the weak hafuri who had failed him, not the other way around.
The tears continued to trickle out, though at a steadier rate while Yukine grasped the front of Yato's tracksuit to anchor him in reality and his master tucked him under his chin.
He cried shamelessly while Yato's hand rubbed his back and someone laid a blanket over him. Once again, he had the urge to thank Kazuma -everyone really- for what they had done for him, but this fit had sapped up all his strength and soon sleep overtook him again.
A couple of days later, Yato teleported them back to the place he called home. He excitedly took in the sight of Kofuku's place he had been longing for and there was a bounce in his step in as he followed Yato in.
"Yukine!"
His eyes jumped away from the walls he was examining because he needed to see every inch of this place and burn it into his memory so he'd never forget it, but he saw a flash of pink eyes and chestnut hair swinging before Hiyori was squeezing him. His eyebrows shot up as he got a mouthful of her cotton sweater since he had been in the process of greeting her.
"Oh, I'm so glad you're okay! I wanted to see you sooner, but I knew you needed time to recover, and I missed you!" She pulled him away and her eyes were wet like pink seashells caught in a tidal wave and he was certain she was on the verge of tears.
"That's okay, Hiyori," he waved away her guilt and then he pulled his lips up in a half-smile. "I missed you too."
"Yukiii!"
Hiyori moved to the side while Yukine blinked when a blur of pink curls and purple eyes came running towards him. He was certain he was about to be bowled over and had no time to even brace himself, but Yato stepped in front of him, caught Kofuku in his arms, and twirled a bit to redirect her momentum.
"Yato-chan, why didn't you tell me you would be coming home tonight?!" Kofuku demanded once she was set down, though her pouting was negated by the joy in her tone as she looked pass Yato to him. He gave her a small wave back, but Kofuku didn't grant them time to speak before she spun around and called out. "Is the cake done? Or at least the cookies? Yuki is already here!" She vibrated where she stood and only now did his nose pick up the scent of sugar and sweetness wafting in. He didn't have to look far to find its source was on the table, which was covered in piles of dishes. He gasped at that and the banner above the table that said in bold rainbow letters "WELCOME HOME!"
Yato groaned from beside him, dragging a hand down his face. "I didn't say anything because I was trying to avoid something like this."
Ignoring him, Hiyori's lips stretched into a wide grin while she spread her arms out in front of the table. "Surprise, Yukine!"
He was speechless as he took in the streamers and balloons littering half the room -clearly not finished. It was as if all the excitement of a festival had shoved into this suddenly took small room and the abruptness of it all disquieted him.
"Hey, kid," Daikoku entered the area with Kofuku hugging his side whilst holding up a plate of frosting-covered cookies.
"You might get a treat."
He froze and the savory smells transformed into the repugnant stench that drifted out a dumpster.
"It's great to have you back." Daikoku was smiling and his ever present gruffness was trimmed down by the cheer emitting from him. He wasn't the only one either. Everyone was smiling at him, and though he noted there was an edge of exhaustion to every one of them -as if they hadn't had a good night's rest in weeks, their every move was thrummed with excitement.
Yukine wanted to feel the same, knew he should, but Kofuku was bouncing over with the plate of cookies and the lights were too bright and it was so noisy and there was too much, just too much.
He took a step back when Kofuku began stretching the plate towards him, but Yato snatched it out her hands.
"Aww, my favorite! You shouldn't have!" Yato stuffed at least four cookies into his mouth to the surprise of everyone and downed them in a single gulp.
"Oy, those weren't for you!" Daikoku marched over to steal the plate back. However, Yato leapt behind a giggling Kofuku and managed to down the last three before Daikoku snagged him by the collar.
"You lousy-"
"But it's a compliment, I only stole them because you're such a great chief, mom!" Yato batted baby blue eyes with a pout to top it off while Kofuku smiled at them in anticipation.
A hand grasped his own and he twisted back to see Hiyori was watching the scene play out too. "I'm glad to see he's back too."
"Huh?"
Hiyori smiled sadly at his confusion. "He hasn't been this alive in a while. I was worried he never would be if we didn't find you soon."
Guilt stabbed him through the heart despite how he knew she hadn't meant it that way. He took a step away from her, unwilling to risk tainting her with his worsening mood.
"I'm going to bed." He whispered and didn't look up from the ground, so he wasn't sure she heard him, but he fled regardless. He couldn't stand the smell or their smiles and he hated that he had caused them so many problems. Who knew how unfocused Hiyori had been in school lately or how many nights Kofuku and Daikoku had sacrificed their rest, and Yato had the greatest burden of all by having to feel those negative emotions from his failure of a shinki.
Yukine buried himself under the covers of his old futon in the hopes the covers could hide his sins too. He tried to shut the world out and was drowning in his guilt when the door creaked open.
He hoped Yato would just let him get away with pretending to sleep but the footsteps pattered over to him and he could tell his master had crouched by him. He waited a minute, but gave in when Yato continued to crouch there.
He tossed the covers off himself but didn't look away from the wall.
"They didn't mean to overwhelm you. They're just excited to have you back."
"I know," he began. "I just don't have an appetite."
"You mean no appetite for sweets."
Yukine lifted his gaze and stared into Yato's blank eyes. There was no judgement there.
Feeling empowered from how Yato wasn't calling him out for being weak -though he was- Yukine offered, "They remind me of Masuta," he hunched his shoulders in and his head nearly disappeared under the covers. "I'm sure I'll get over it eventually."
He had to make sure Yato understood he wouldn't be this weak forever. He wouldn't be a burden again. He wasn't a total failure.
Yato grimaced and clutched at his heart, and Yukine wanted to ease the pain, but the sight of his weakness manifesting in his master simply furthered his feelings of shame.
"Mind telling me why you've been feeling so guilty lately?" Yato leaned down so he was closer to his eye level.
Yukine forced himself to sit up and Yato straightened as he crossed his legs and coolly observed his regalia. "Isn't it obvious?" He wondered if his master wanted him to admit it like a jury wanted to hear a criminal admit his crimes before condemning him.
"Considering I can't think of a single thing a person that's been kidnapped and locked up unjustly has to be guilty for, no, it's not obvious." The sarcasm surprised him, but the words surprised him even more. He stared into Yato's face and was expecting the burning anger and scowl, but not how it found a target that wasn't him. The anger -no, hate- were aimed beyond him and Yato was seething beneath his calm exterior.
His master had lied, he had already figured out why Yukine felt the way he did. He just needed confirmation.
Yato reigned in his hate and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Yukine, listen to me." He placed his hands on his shoulder and peered into his orange orbs. "You have nothing to be ashamed about."
Yukine tried to open his mouth but his master squeezed his shoulders and he clamped his mouth.
"You might think that it's your fault you got captured or that you couldn't escape, but I know you, kid," One of his hands slid up to touch the edge of the bandages around his throat. "I know you fought back, I know you gave it your all." His gaze fell to the floor. "Kofuku saw you at the auction,"
Yukine inhaled sharply, and leaned away because it had never occurred to him that someone had seen him in the flesh that day. Nervous for what Yato would bring up -how he had been broken or let Masuta lead him like a dog- he swallowed thickly.
Yato didn't notice his distress. "She was trying to bid for you so we could get you to safety before we attacked. But more importantly, she told me what happened."
He trembled because he felt enough shame without having his master recap in detail how he had failed. "You nearly brought the roof down," Yato grinned and he looked...looked proud? "If a shinki hadn't sent a borderline to slow yours down, the whole place would have been rubble. And when I heard you call for me, I could tell you hadn't given up. No matter what they did to you, my kid never gave up."
Yukine stilled because Yato was boasting.
About him.
He had been such a failure and yet Yato was boasting about him. Surely Kofuku had told him how he let Miryoku take him, but then again, Yato might have thought the collar had been keeping him in line, which was true. So maybe...maybe he hadn't failed Yato.
"Besides, I'm the master, I was the one supposed to protect you." Yato sagged, hands falling away. Yukine could tell where he was heading so latched onto his master's arms before they slid off his shoulders. Yato whipped his head up and Yukine glared at him. "You bakagami! Why don't you ever use your head?!" He pulled Yato in, ignoring his cry of surprise, so they were nose-to-nose. "I'm your hafuri, which means I have the same responsibility to protect you. So if it's not my fault, it can't be yours either!"
He released him and Yato nearly lost his balance as he snapped back. He looked bewildered for a second, but soon enough the corner of his mouth quirked up.
"And they call me stubborn," he mumbled as he scratched the back of his head. "There's just no arguing with you."
Yukine crossed his arms and turned his nose up. "No, so don't bother."
Yato didn't speak for a moment, but then he hopped to his feet. "Well, if that's what my hafuri recommends, I'll do it."
Yukine beamed like hadn't done for weeks and it strained his facial muscles, but it pleased him to no end when Yato said that. The trust and pride he put into those words uplifted his spirit like nothing else could.
Yato didn't blame him, he didn't blame Yato, and together, maybe they could stop blaming their selves.
Yukine awoke to arms wound over his waist and he didn't bother questioning when Yato rolled out of his futon and ended up next to him. He cautiously shuffled under the covers and found that the grip was lax enough that Yato's arms rolled to the side by the time he had rolled over to face his sleeping master. A part of him was tempted to wake the lazy bum, but he saw that Yato still had a hint of dark rings under his eyes. Besides, he didn't mind this breach in personal space. It was such a contrast to that silent, dark cell of isolation that he always knew he was safe when he awoke to the god's limbs strewn over him.
Thus he eased himself up and tucked his knees under himself once he was free. He tossed one of his blankets over Yato and fixed it until his whole body was covered because it was chilly this morning. He considered sneaking a pillow under his head but decided not to risk it as he rose up. He stretched his arms heavenward and mussed his hair while he made his way downstairs. He expected to hear the sounds of breakfast being started and was eager to join in, but was shocked by the brunet sitting at the table.
"K-Kazuma?" He hurried over and caught sight of a note lying around, but didn't give it any attention.
The older regalia turned to him, unruffled by his underdressed state though Kazuma's clothes made him feel like a slob.
"I know you weren't expecting me, but Kofuku let me in before leaving. I think she convinced him to let her help with the shopping."
Yukine took a seat across from him. "Oh, that makes sense." There had been a feast waiting for him after all. The sheer quantity of food had lasted even after Hiyori came over yesterday to give him newer math books and had shared two meals with the group before heading home. He supposed if the two weren't back by the time Yato woke up, he would heat up one of the dishes for him and Yato. It was probably around brunch time anyway.
"There's something I need to discuss with you and it can't wait any longer." Kazuma's tone was curt enough to recapture his attention yet as polite as ever. "Bishamon would like your help in capturing Masuta."
It was a good thing he was already seated or he might have fainted on the spot. As he was, he had to grasp the table to remain upright.
"What?!"
Kazuma narrowed his eyes at him. "You didn't know Masuta was on the run. I'm sorry, Yato told me he would notify you by today. Though that explains why he's been ignoring my calls since yesterday."
Yukine hardly registered his words because Masuta hadn't been caught. All these days he had been lounging around and Masuta had been out there. He could be right outside waiting to take him, and yes, that was a ridiculous thought but he couldn't shake the feeling that there was a grain of truth to it. Masuta wasn't far away receiving punishment from the Heavens, like he was led to believe, he was lurking around the city and perhaps plotting on how to rebuild his crime ring.
"He didn't tell me," Yukine began, mind trapped in a circle of possibilities thanks to this bombshell of knowledge. "He only told me that most of the bidders had been caught and so had Masuta's employees. He also said the shinki were either returning to their masters...or if they no longer have one, some gods were happy to take them in." He had been so pleased when Yato told him that. Especially when he remembered the girl who had been crying as she was led off the stage. He never got her name, but Yato had told him she had been reunited with her master too. Now he wondered if that were true or had those been false words of comfort to soothe Yato's "fragile" regalia?
"That is true," Kazuma leaned forward a bit, perhaps reading the doubt on his face. "However, Masuta and at least five of his shinki escaped. Fortunately we have managed to set up a meeting between him and one of his favorite clients."
He tried not to get worked up but he was talking about Miryoku, and now he knew where this was heading.
"Masuta is under the impression that he's buying back a blessed regalia. Considering the massive hit his organization has taken and how hard it is to find blessed regalias in general, especially ones with minor gods as masters, he should be desperate." Kazuma laid out the facts like one dished out a grocery list, emotions firmly in check.
He admired his fellow hafuri's control because Yukine could never keep his emotions under lock and key like him -perhaps because Kazuma was older or was simply wired that way. It was no matter as he clenched his fists and felt his body hum in anticipation.
"And what do you need me for?"
He needed confirmation before he did anything rash.
"You would be the bait."
Yukine closed his eyes in an attempt to settle himself and it worked to an extent because he had expected this.
"Masuta was very impressed with you, and we know he's desperate, but he's no fool. He would wonder how Miryoku had another blessed regalia if we tried to use someone else, and even if that worked, he would question why Miryoku's wasn't with you. Apparently he is under the impression Miryoku had left before we shut down the auction."
Yukine opened his eyes and rose. "Could you wait here? I have to talk to my useless master, it shouldn't take long."
He saw surprise cross Kazuma's face but didn't dwell on this as he hurried up the stairs. He burst into the room and could not bring himself to care as he slammed the door shut behind him and Yato shot up, covers flying to the side.
"Why didn't you tell me about Masuta?"
Yato blinked rapidly. "Huh? Why'd ya wake-"
"He could get away and all those shinki he has will be trapped for years if not forever with him!" He loomed over Yato and his master was now fully awake if the sharpness in his gaze was any indication.
His master shook his head to rid himself of lingering exhaustion and then squared his shoulders when he saw Yukine's fury. "That's because her plan is stupid and she can use one of her own kids if she's so eager." Yato rose in a fluid movement and suddenly Yukine felt small as the god leveled a stern glare on him. "We're not getting involved."
Yukine lifted his chin. "Yes, I am." He turned but Yato caught his arm. "Yukine, what's wrong with you? It's been less than a week, and you think you're ready to jump into danger?" He placed his hand on his shoulder and his fingertips tapped at his bandages. "You're not healed yet, physically or otherwise, and I can sense your fear, so don't tell me you're not afraid."
He scowled because it was true. He was scared. He didn't want to see Masuta or Miryoku. He wanted to stay home and never leave because he had missed this place and the people in it, but then he thought about the shinki. The ones he hadn't met, that woman with the bruises on her skin, and the regalia that reminded him of Nora. They needed his help and he was the only one who could do this before Masuta skipped town.
Yato was frowning and his arms were crossed, but he could see tell he wasn't just angry. He was afraid too. Not for himself, but for his hafuri. Yukine wasn't the only one that wanted him to simply bask in the fact he was home with the people he cared about most.
"Yato," His fists unfurled and his voice lightened. "Please, they need me. They might have masters that need them, that miss them. I was gone for days but they might have been stuck with Masuta for years."
He waited to see if he struck a chord, but Yato's face was a blank canvas. Even his eyes gave no indication to his feelings. Yukine wondered if he had miscalculated, if his master really was so selfish.
"Fine," Yato headed towards the door without sparing him a glance. "I'm going to discuss this with Bishamon."
And the lack of an insulting nickname towards his longtime rival was more telling than how his master brushed pass him.
Yukine waited a moment and then sank against the wall because he was going to confront Masuta and Miryoku and he wasn't ready.
But he was doing it anyway.
And once again, I am not done with this story. Why? Because the story decided to keep getting longer and longer until I had to move Masuta's appearance to the epilogue, which is the next chapter. Sorry if anyone wanted to see Yato give someone a beat down, but I swear the next chapter is the last one. And I will update in less than a week so don't worry about another long wait!
