"Everyone, watch your flanks! We're being surrounded."
"Don't worry, we're gonna be fine."
"DVa, you're out of position, fall back!"
Pew pew pew. One down
"Relax, Dad, I got this!"
"It's Commander Morrison-"
"Everybody, take cover! Activating self-destruct sequence! Nerf This!"
Boom. Multi-kill
"...See? Area cleared. Gg easy."
*Sigh* "Hostiles down. We- DVa, behind you!"
Bang
Hana slowly awoke, opening her eyes to the sight of an unfamiliar ceiling. She clearly wasn't in her room at the base, but the ceiling was clean white, even if the brightness hurt her eyes a little, and she was lying in a soft, warm bed, so that was a start.
As her senses gradually returned, Hana noticed a regular beeping sound emanating from her side, and an odd tightness around her midriff, and lastly the faint but still distinct scent of disinfectant permeating the room. She was still pretty tired, so she really just wanted to turn on her side and stay asleep like half an hour longer, but the incessant beeping, which seemed to have increased in speed a little since she'd noticed it, was just too loud and distracting.
But as she tried to find the source and turn it off, something held Hana's left arm, and when she shoved aside the thick blanket a little, she noticed that her wrist had been loosely tied to the frame of the bed – as well as the thin plastic tubes inserted into her arm, fastened by adhesives. Oh, right. Everything suddenly came rushing back to her. Then that sound would be a heart monitor, and odds were it'd already registered she was awake and notifie-
As if on cue the door of the room all but flew open and Angela entered, wearing her usual labcoat, her expression showing equal parts worry and relief. "Hana, you're awake!"
"...Hey, doc." Hana's voice sounded coarse and weak as Angela pulled up a chair to sit right next to the bed, reaching for Hana's right hand after but a moment of deliberation; somehow the medic's slender, slightly cool fingers atop her hand had something stabilizing, comforting to them.
"How are you feeling?" Angela's voice was calm and professional, but Hana also caught the undercurrent of worry the woman failed to entirely hide.
"Kinda like shit." Now that she was starting to fully wake, Hana also registered how sore and weak she felt, her upper body in particular, her head was still a little hazy, and there was a vague, dull pain in her right side and all over her back. "I'm on some pretty bad painkillers, aren't I?"
"Yes. And it's best it stay that way for the moment, but we can start slowly lowering the dose now." Angela made a quick note on the clipboard she'd taken from the foot of Hana's bed. "Do you remember what happened?"
"We were out on a mission, and I used MEKA's self-destruct to blow up a bunch of guys, and I think a grenade or something went up pretty close to me, and then... then I woke up here."
"I see. According to Jack- Commander Morrison it was some small grenade thrown by an agent that managed to dodge your blast. You took most of the hit to your back, but Jack used his biotic tech to immediately stabilize you, and you actually made it back to the shuttle on your own, though you probably were in shock, so you may not remember that part too clearly."
"Yeah, something like that." Now Hana could at least vaguely recall as much, she'd made some dumb joke about her injury that the Commander hadn't been amused about at all, but after that...
"On the flight back you suddenly collapsed and your condition worsened rapidly from an internal bleeding Jack hadn't managed to stop completely. B-by the time they got you to the base you were almost-" Angela broke off, her voice almost cracking, and she took a long, slightly shaky breath to steady herself before continuing. "For a few seconds you actually were clinically dead. I-I managed to save you, but you still slept for more than three days. I... everyone was worried about you-"
The medic fell silent once again, leaning forward to carefully wrap her arms around Hana, the girl returning the embrace with her free arm as good as she could. "I'm just glad you're okay, Liebling."
"Yeah, thanks to you, doc. You're a real lifesaver. Literally." Hana giggled, but when she shifted a little, a sudden spike of pain in her back made her wince.
A few moments later Angela let go, pulling back and making a few more notes on the clipboard. "You need to rest a lot more. I'll tell everyone else you're awake, but should I allow visitors in yet?"
"...Not right now, I'm freaking tired. Not like I just slept three whole days."
Angela chuckled. "Very well. I'll make sure you get some food, and hopefully we can take out that IV soon too. There's a button on the headboard, call me if there's anything else you need."
"Will do."
Angela got up, putting back the clipboard, then lightly brushing her hand over Hana's forehead before turning to leave. "Please get well soon, Hana."
...
A little later Tracer – wearing an old-timey nurse costume, wherever the heck she'd gotten that from – brought Hana a light lunch, which she practically devoured within minutes, only then noticing how hungry she'd felt, as well as her phone and handheld console, with best regards from Angela. The medic's forethought made Hana smile; she still hated being stuck in a bed, but at least this way she wouldn't be too bored, and she could update her fans about her absence.
Later that evening Angela returned to check up on Hana again and take out her IV line, prescribing her some pills – painkillers obviously, and antibiotics – instead. The medic wound up staying the evening to keep her company, and even though her head was still somewhat hazy and she couldn't recall much of their conversation by the next morning, Hana clearly remembered falling asleep with Angela watching over her by her side.
...
The next morning, Hana was feeling significantly better – apart from the pain in her back of course –, and she was downright itching to finally get out of her bed. She took her antibiotics, but after closely reading the leaflet wound up only taking half the amount of painkiller Angela had recommended; she'd take a little pain if it meant her head would be clearer too, and it wasn't like Hana couldn't take more later if she had to.
When she told Angela as much when she came to check up on her, the medic just smiled. "I see. I figured you might do this; it's okay, but if your pain gets too bad, do take more, there's no need to try to act tough or anything."
"Pff, I can take it. It's just a flesh wound, how bad can it be?"
Angela's face briefly darkened before she continued. "It was quite bad, you shouldn't make light of your injuries. Either way. In a normal hospital, I'd keep you here a few days longer for sure, but since you'll be at base until I clear you for missions again, I think I can let you return to your room, you're already starting to go stir-crazy, aren't you?"
"Kinda." Hana stretched her arms over her head as far as she could before the pain made her stop. "I hate sitting around doing nothing. Also my room is much nicer."
"That too." Angela smiled. "Before I let you go, I'd like to change the dressing on your wounds. Now that you're awake, do you want to, um, get some underwear beforehand?"
Hana only now fully registered that she was wearing nothing but a baggy hospital gown ...okay, and panties at least. That meant that Angela had most definitely seen- "Um, yeah, that'd be nice." She failed completely stop the blush spreading on her face, even as she noticed that so did Angela.
"Do you want to try to go to your room yourself, or should I-"
"I wanna walk myself, I really need to move a bit."
"Very well. Then come on. Carefully..." Taking the hand Angela offered her, Hana gingerly sat up straight, pushing her legs over the side of the bed before slowly and deliberately standing up.
For a moment she wavered, and could already see Angela preparing to catch her, and a small part of her would have liked that, almost tempting her to fall just so the doctor would hold her, but that would have been pretty dumb. Instead Hana steadied herself, taking a small shaky step, and then another, before flashing Angela a wide grin. "See? I'm just fine."
"That's good. But don't overexert yourself." Keeping a deliberately slow pace, Angela led Hana to her room, where the teen just grabbed the first bra she found in her drawer, a plain dark green one, her favourite pink shorts and a baggy t-shirt. Hana quickly put them on, in the process noticing how the bandages wrapped around pretty much her entire stomach and then some, from just under her solarplexus almost all the way to her hips, before they returned to the med wing, but entered a normal treatment room instead.
While Angela prepared new bandages and put on sterile gloves, Hana left the hospital gown over the back of a chair, then took off her shirt, turning her back to Angela and ultimately deciding not to use the opportunity to tease her a bit, the situation just didn't feel appropriate at all. Angela quickly and routinely took off the bandages, and from the corner of her eye Hana could make out a decent amount of red staining the fabric. Jeez. Just how badly had she gotten hurt?
As Angela applied a new dressing to the wound Hana could have sworn for a moment her fingers were unusually shaky, but by the time she wrapped a new bandage around Hana's midriff – her ticklishness making it quite hard for her to stay still under the medic's touch – Angela's hands were the very picture of calm again, as was to be expected from a top-class surgeon. But still...
"How is this? Not too tight?" Angela asked and Hana carefully flexed and turned her upper body as far as she could.
"It's fine." Not like she was gonna do any serious moving any time soon.
"Good. If possible you want to keep doing some light movement to keep in shape, jogging for example. But obviously no stronger exercises, especially no heavy lifting."
"Do I look like a pink-haired Siberian to you?"
"No, but it's always better to be safe than sorry. Both in my time with Overwatch and before that, the amount of times I've had injuries reopening or worsening because people seemed to lack a bit of common sense is astounding. Please don't add to that number." For whatever reason Angela seemed legitimately worried, so Hana chose not to make a dumb comeback for once and just nodded.
"Got it. Anything else?"
"No. You're cleared to go. I need to finish the report about your injury, but after that I'm free. Thankfully no one else got injured past a few scrapes."
"Well, that's something, right?" Hana allowed herself a grin; this was definitely good to hear. "By the way, I just noticed you never really told me what my damage was."
Angela briefly froze, taking several seconds to answer. "It was pretty bad."
"I figured that out on my own. Can't you be more specific? ...What's wrong?" Hana asked a few moments later as Angela visibly hesitated. "There wasn't like any side effects you forgot to mention, right? I won't have scales growing on my back or anything, right? Though that could be kind of badass too..."
"That's not it. Just... I'm sorry, I'm being incredibly unprofessional."
"Huh? What's wrong?"
"You know there's a reason normally doctors aren't supposed to treat their own family members or close friends?"
"Um, yeah. Stuff about their judgement or something."
"Yes, that too. I deeply care for just about any of my comrades in Overwatch, old and new. Yet I take it on me to treat all of you. Because of that I take it on me to treat all of you." Angela's conviction was plainly obvious and Hana could tell the medic would stand alone against the entire world if she felt she had to (except she'd never be alone, Hana would always be by her side).
But the very next sentence Angela's voice sounded so infinitely more vulnerable. "And I would never have it any other way, but... I'm still human, Hana. I will heal all of you as often as it takes, and I will do it properly. But seeing the people I care for hurt... it tears at me, every single time. I can keep it out of the treatment room, Mercy is always focused on the task at hand. But after that, Angela can't help but worry about her comrades, friends. Seeing any of you injured, it truly hurts and-" Angela broke off, her voice failing.
"Whoa." Hana had not expected that. "Easy there, doc." Without really thinking she stepped closer to Angela, ignoring the small sting in her back as she pulled the woman into a hug, which she returned after a moment's surprise. "I'm fine. ...Well, I'm alive at least. Thanks to you. Everything's gonna be alright, got it?"
For several moments Angela just tightly held Hana close to her, as if she wanted to shield the girl from any that would dare harm her, and she couldn't help but catch the scent of the medic's perfume over the hint of disinfectant that never seemed to let go of her, a light and kind of flowery, airy aroma. "...Got it. And again, I'm sorry." Angela let go of Hana and pulled back a little, but still stayed quite close to her.
"There's nothing to be sorry about. I didn't realize this was so hard on you, I mean, I slept through most of it. But it's okay, I can just read the report-"
"No, no, I'll be fine." Angela shook her head. "You are alright now after all." She took a deep breath as if to brace herself, her gaze quickly flickering over what had to be the half-finished injury report on her desk.
"As I said, you got hit by the blast of a grenade. Jack stopped the superficial bleeding, but you would have required surgery to remove some of the shrapnel anyways."
"Yeah, his healing magic isn't nearly as good as your healing magic."
"It's not magic." Hana's remark at least coaxed a small smile from Angela as she continued. "And in fact Jack's Biotic Field and my Caduceus are based on the exact same technology, his is just weaker and less finely-controlled, but also much more resource efficient. Besides, even when I heal injuries in the field I only remove foreign bodies if I have to and otherwise leave them for after the fighting."
"Right." Hana could very much recall the one time Angela had had to cut open her thigh after a mission to pluck out a bullet that had been lodged in there. "Internal bleeding." She prompted the woman to continue.
"Yes. There was a piece of shrapnel in your kidney, and a larger one in your spleen. Either one must have come loose during some sudden movement and- and-"
"I almost bled to death." Hana bluntly finished as Angela broke off again. "But you were there to save me, so all's well that ends well."
"...I suppose." Angela let out a long breath, yet her expression was still sombre.
"Come on, cheer up! It's gonna need a lot more than that to take me out, I'll be fine. Plus the mission was a success too, Morrison found that whatever prototype in the old Watchpoint, no one else got injured, and I took out a whole bunch of bad guys. Total play-of-the-game material right there. You should have seen me, I wonder if any other camera caught-"
"What were you thinking?" Angela's voice was almost completely flat and dangerously low, making Hana pause instantly.
"Huh?"
"What. Were you. Thinking. Out there? I saw some bits of footage, and I talked to the others. You were ignoring orders, breaking formation to charge ahead, and all around being way too reckless."
"What?! No, I wasn't! I always fight like that."
Angela didn't even acknowledge Hana's protest. "Were you trying to impress your stream or something?"
"Well..." Not her stream per se, but it appeared she had failed miserably either way.
"Then what were you thinking acting like this? You were out in an active battlefield!"
"You think I don't know that?!" Hana frowned. She was recovering from a pretty bad injury; why was Angela so mad at her? "What's your problem all of a sudden? It's not like the both of us never got hurt before."
"But this time was worse. You almost died, Hana!"
"Yeah, but I didn't. And besides, that's the risk we both, all of us, live with. We wouldn't be doing what we're doing if we didn't think that risk was worth it. Don't you?"
"...Yes I do."
"Then what's your problem?! What are you yelling at me for?"
"Because you were being pointlessly foolhardy! You were endangering yourself for no clear reason other than thinking it would 'look cool' or something!"
"That's just the way I am! It never bothered you before!"
"Yes it did! And I told you before to be more careful. Every time any of you go out on a mission while I'm left here, I worry sick about you until you return! Do you not get that?"
"We're fighting a war, in case you missed it! People will get hurt. But that's what you're here for, isn't it?"
"Well, yes. But I don't need you adding to that risk. You wouldn't have gotten hurt like this if you'd just thought ahead for two seconds!"
Hana really didn't want to argue with Angela like this, but she wasn't gonna let herself be attacked like that either. "Maybe I wouldn't. Or maybe I would anyways, or maybe someone else would have instead. In battle there's no way to be sure."
"But that's no reason to act the way you did!" Angela's voice was cracking, and she just barely seemed to be holding herself together. "Don't you realize you almost died?!"
"I damn well realize! And guess what? That wasn't even the first time this happened, and it might not be the last either!"
"Not if you keep being so careless it won't! Hana, if you die in this fight, there is no respawn button or 'load save'! You can't keep treating life like a game!"
"Yes I can." Hana muttered, low enough even Angela didn't understand her. 'Cause if I don't, I don't know if I'd be able to bear it all.
"Hana, are you listening to me? I truly wish you'd be just a little more careful. The last few days were horrible. Verdammt, I was so worried about you!"
"That's good for you, but why the hell do you keep acting like you're the only one who's ever worried about someone?! I care about everyone here too! And I do worry about them!" About you.
"Then why won't you understand?!" Angela kept growing louder, but Hana found herself keeping up in volume, even if she knew this wasn't the best thing to do right now.
"I understand perfectly!" Hana clenched her fists, trying to keep herself from shouting. "That's why I keep doing this! I'd be completely fine with streaming games all day and defending my title, and only needing your help for a bad cough or a sprained ankle, not gunshot wounds or broken bones. But we both know that's not an option!"
"I know! Even if I wish it were different. But none of that gives you a reason to act as recklessly as you did! If anything, knowing the risks, you should be more careful!"
"I keep fucking telling you I know! Just as well as you do!" Part of her was telling Hana she should really back off before one of them might say something she might regret later, but by this point she didn't really care. "I've gotten hurt pretty bad before, and I've lost people dear to me before! Just like you! But just like you, I choose to keep doing this, because I believe in my reasons to fight! Because that's my choice!"
"Then sometimes I have to wonder if you were ever fit to make that choice in the first place!" The outright sting in Angela's words made Hana flinch and she grit her teeth before firing back.
"I damn well am! No more or less than you! Why do you keep throwing such a massive fit and treating me like a child that needs protecting, just because I got injured a bit?!"
"Because you're not seeing it! You didn't just get injured, Hana, you almost died!"
"No one lives forever, doc! So we might as well make the best out of what we got, I'm not gonna slow down just because I might get hurt a little!"
Angela looked like she was about to either hit Hana or burst into tears. "Then you're just a foolish, reckless child! Your checkup is finished, Miss Song, you are dismissed."
"L-look, sorry, Angela, I-" "Get. Out." Said without any intonation, the words somehow hit Hana harder than if Angela had been screaming at the top of her lungs.
With an angry shout Hana stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her, and rushed to her room as fast as her injury would let her, barely holding back her tears until she'd locked the door behind her, throwing herself onto her bed heedless of the new spike of pain in her back, and just screaming her sadness and frustration into her pillow.
Hana was awoken by a knock on the door and rolled onto her side as she slowly opened her eyes. How could she just fall asleep like that? Those painkillers weren't that potent, were they? She got up, sitting onto the side of her bed, when the sudden pain in her back made her wince. Speaking about painkillers...
She quickly found the sheet of tablets Mercy had given her in her pocket, taking one out and placing the rest on her nightstand, but before Hana could find water or at least something liquid to swallow it, there was another knock. "Leave me alone, Angela."
"Ain't the doc. Open up, kiddo." That drawl was pretty recognizable.
"McCree. What do you want?" Okay, maybe she was being a bit rude, but right now Hana couldn't quite find it in her to really care either.
"I just wanna talk. You lettin' me in or no?"
"...Alright. Just a sec." Standing up, Hana quickly checked herself in the mirror, straightening her shirt a little bit; the whisker markings on her cheeks were all but faded – she really should look into getting some nano-tattoos – and her hair was kind of messy, but she probably could give it a pass for now.
Hana opened the door to let the cowboy in, then proceeded to finally get a glass and take her pill with some tap water, while McCree no doubt inspected her room, with her streaming setup, extra-size bed covered in plushie mascots from various franchises, and collection of posters, including an old Overwatch one Hana had gotten all members still present to sign. "Nice room ya got there."
"Heck yeah I do." Hana grinned, but just a moment later she realized the reason for McCree's presence and her expression fell. "Are you here to yell at me too?"
"Nothin' like that. 'm just glad you're okay." Right. Okay, he probably was, McCree had been with her on that mission too. But still... While Hana certainly didn't dislike him – in fact she found McCree to be a very likeable person – the two of them weren't that close either that Hana would have expected him to be the first one to come check on her; her best guess for that would have been Lúcio, but right now the DJ was on an assignment somewhere in Nigeria to get in touch with a potential new candidate for Overwatch. And besides, how had McCree even known...
"Did Angela send you?"
"She didn't." He shook his head "An' neither did Morrison."
Hana dropped to sit onto the edge of her bed, the pain from her back making her lightly flinch again, before she answered. "Then why are you here?"
"Fareeha asked me to. She came by the med bay earlier and heard you an' Angie argue. Says she didn't listen in, but she talked to Angie later-"
"And how is that your problem?!" Hana interrupted him with a frown. "Why can't you people just leave my stuff to me?"
"'Cause it ain't just about you, kiddo, 's about the doc too. Angie was real worried about you."
"Yeah, but I don't get her at all!" Hana hardly noticed that she'd picked up a small plushie and started fidgeting with it. "Not like that's the first time someone got hurt like this and she had to patch them up, is it?" Even if as far as Hana could remember, hers had been the first immediate, life-threatening injury since Overwatch had been unofficially reinstated.
"Not at all. But she couldn' always save everyone either." McCree let out a long sigh, and for a moment he seemed just that much older, kind of like Angela sometimes would too. "There's one story 'specially. May I..." He paused to reach for the chair in front of Hana's desk, and with a nod she pushed it over to him with her foot.
"Much obliged." McCree sat in the chair, swivelling a little and leaning back as he continued. "It happened a few months after Angie had joined Overwatch, and she was startin' to learn the ropes and getting more used to combat – an' getting into arguments with the Commander and Reyes about how they should do things." And from what Hana knew about the decline and fall of Overwatch, Angela had probably been right on the money, even then.
"There was this one agent. Callsign 'Edge', went by Ricky. Explosives expert, and a damn good one at that. Sharp kid, but reckless, and a bit of a mouth on him. Still, everyone loved him, a great guy, fun to be 'round. Got along great with everyone, but he and Angie were particularly close. No idea why, not the least 'cause he'd always keep hittin' on her."
Hana couldn't help but briefly frown before catching herself. Why was this of all things annoying her? ...Again? Stop it. "Did they ever... start anything?"
"Don' think so. Doubt he ever really meant it, Ricky was flirtin' with just about every girl on the team – an' some of the boys. But Angie told him off pretty clear pretty quick. ...An' you didn't get this from me," McCree briefly lowered his voice, making Hana listen up "but I heard the doc may be into women anyways."
"Really?!" Hana just barely managed to not break into a wide grin, doing her best to keep her expression neutral. "I mean, is she?"
"'s what I reckon at least. Ricky never had a shot with Angie. But nevertheless, or maybe 'cause of that, the two were real close. Almost wanna say he was a bit like a brother to her." Clearly important to Angela, well-liked by everyone, yet Hana hadn't heard this guy mentioned once, and McCree was only using past tense... Yeah, she had seen enough anime to know there was no way this one ended well.
McCree let out a long breath before her continued. "But then, one day... A town in Africa was hit by a disaster, half the buildings trashed, thousands dead. Of course Overwatch sent some aid, including the doc, naturally. But instead of working together with 'em to help everyone, local warlords and gangs tried to use the chaos and take over, and fer whatever reason, even Talon involved themselves. It was – pardon my French – a right clusterfuck."
"Long story short, one thing led to another, the Commander had Overwatch show up almost full force, which of course some of the fighters really weren't keen on, and things went downhill, fast. The last few days of the mission were all-out war between us and the government against three huge gangs, who also fought among each other ...and the remaining civilians caught in the middle, innocent women and children." The cowboy hardly raised his voice, but his anger was still readily apparent, if at the gangs, Overwatch, or both, Hana couldn't tell.
"Then it happened. Ricky, Angie, myself an' a few others were on out way back to the camp, when we were suddenly ambushed, half a dozen thugs opening fire out of nowhere. After a bomb had gone off earlier that day, Ricky had insisted on taking point, so he took most of the fire. Poor kid never stood a chance. Later turned out they were using special Blackwatch ammo that shredded right through his armour; he was dead before the doc even got to him, there was nothing she could do."
McCree finally paused and Hana let out a breath she hadn't even noticed she'd been holding, completely mesmerized by his story, the man really had a way with words. "Suffice to say, Angie was devastated; after we took out those thugs, she almost broke down then an' there. Somehow she kept herself together until the mission was over, an' even on our flight back she held it in. But once we were back at HQ, she just up and shut herself in her room for two days, you could hear her crying through the door."
That had to have been pretty hard on Angela, but what was McCree getting at? "Eventually she ...moved on, you'd say but... somethin' like that stays with you forever. Every death does."
Hana nodded. "Yeah." So far four MEKA pilots had been killed in action while fighting the Kaiju Omnic, and Hana had known all of them, one had been a good friend. She knew she'd always remember their names, and she could recall what had ...happened to each of them with alarming clarity, those memories would be in the forefront of her mind when she was having a real bad day or trouble falling asleep. "...But what's your point?"
"'m not saying the doc ain't a strong woman, might well be stronger than the lot of us here, but she still feels just the same as we do." Well, obviously. "Let me be perfectly blunt with you, kiddo: Angie cares about you. A lot. Maybe more than you realize."
Sure, their slightly odd friendship had grown pretty close pretty quickly, and Hana felt more for Angela than even that... "Lemme put it that way: If someone were to hurt the doc just as bad as you were, what would you do?"
She'd be worried as hell. "I'd wreck their shit and make sure they never hurt anyone again!"
McCree smirked. "So would I. But Angie doesn't believe in payback, says revenge only breeds more revenge, an' she's probably right. So she was left with you in a coma for days, no clue when you'd wake up, imagine how she must've felt. ...How would you feel if it was her?"
Well, Hana would- oh. ...Oh. The realization hit her like a charging Ultralisk. How had Hana not gotten that? "I really fucked up, didn't I?"
"Jus' talk to her, you're gonna be fine."
Yeah, that was probably the best course of action. "I will." Hana got up to carefully give the cowboy a brief hug. "Thanks for the talk, Jesse-oppa."
"Yer welcome, kiddo."
Agent Richard "Edge" L. Jenkins – 18.06.2038 – 23.03.2067
Hana hadn't even known the base had a memorial, but here it was. And more names on it than she had expected too. Over a dozen Agents, along with numerous other military personnel, as well as some office and medical staff. And a whole lot of people on one day, two of the three names at the top bearing that very same date, one she knew from both her history lessons and personal memory, even if 13-year old Hana had been right in her teenage years and not paid the whole thing too much attention back then.
History lessons aside, why had Hana even come here? McCree had only mentioned the memorial wall in passing as he'd been about to leave, but after getting dressed and freshened up, mulling over her words for way too long and then deciding to just wing it, instead of searching for Angela, Hana had been compelled to visit here first.
Thankfully no one else was around, or someone totally would have asked her what she was doing here. And they would have had a point. Sure, she knew of the founders of Overwatch, had even worked with Soldier:76 – as he now wanted to be called because 'Jack Morrison is dead' – on missions, and she recognized a few more of the more well-known Heroes, but she'd never met or known any of them. To Hana these names ultimately were just that, names.
...But to Angela they weren't. Even if dating back to the time she had joined Overwatch only left a portion of the list, Angela had to have known some of these people, been friends with them, grieved for them. And not only had Hana almost gone and added to that number just because she'd had to show off, but then argued with her like a petulant child instead of taking Angela's worry at all seriously. In retrospect, the medic had probably had every right to be pissed at Hana. Hopefully she could still fix this. Briefly bowing in memory of the fallen, Hana turned to leave and find Angela.
"Angela? Are you there?"
"Fareeha. Good evening." Angela finished filling in the row in the requisitions form before looking up. How had they managed to go through so many bandages so quickly? "How can I help you?"
"For one I wanted to ask you if you'd like to have dinner with me. You've been skipping meals again." Angela looked to the side with a guilty expression as Fareeha mirrored her late mother's reprimanding tone with eerie accuracy.
"I know. I was just so worried about Hana." Angela had spent more time than she necessarily cared to admit keeping a silent vigil at the girl's bed.
"I'm really glad she's better, though." For your sake too. Fareeha didn't say, but Angela knew her long enough to fill that bit in for herself.
"So am I. And I'm game for dinner, give me five more minutes to finish this..."
"Actually... there's something else I wanted to talk with you about."
"Hm?"
"Well-I... I heard you and Hana argue earlier." Fareeha blurted out and Angela froze. "I didn't listen in or anything, but I heard you two shouting, and a bit later Hana rushed right past me on her way to her room, and..."
Fareeha trailed off and Angela let out a long sigh as she swivelled her chair around to face the younger woman, if she was going to vent to anyone it would be Fareeha anyways. "How can she be so careless!? Hana keeps treating everything like a game; it almost got her killed."
Fareeha nodded. "But to be fair, several of us wound up in a really bad spot at some point or the other. ...Myself included." She added with a sheepish expression. "But I don't recall that ever leading to a shouting match of these proportions."
"But that's different! You're a professional, a trained soldier."
"And so is Hana. She may be immature and ...unconventional at times, but she's in this, because she believes in what she does, and wants to give her all to make a difference, just like us."
"...Well, yes. But she's-"
"That's what you told me when she first joined and I was the one being sceptical. ...Are you doubting her?"
...Was she? "N-no, I- ...Do you think I overreacted?"
"I can't really say without knowing all the details but, you might have." Angela sighed; after their argument, in hindsight she'd quickly feared as much. And despite her honesty and downright bluntness, Fareeha's assessments tended to be right on the money, another thing she had in common with her mother; Ana too had sometimes seemed to know Angela better than the medic did herself.
But at least her course of action was clear now. "I have to apologize to her." While Angela positively did positively not approve of Hana's recklessness, she also would admit that – fueled by worry and a bit of tiredness – she had clearly overreacted. Some of the things she'd said had been out of line.
"You really care about her, don't you?" Fareeha interrupted Angela's train of thought. "That's why got so mad at her, you were worried."
Anger born of worry. That aptly described it. "Wouldn't you?" Angela countered. "And besides, I care – and worry – about everyone here."
"But not like this, not in the same way. You feel something special for her, don't you?"
Angela was about to protest, but just as quickly paused. It was readily apparent just what feelings Fareeha was referring to, and the more Angela thought about it, the more the truth was just as undeniable. I... I do.
"W-well, we're good friends, and she's still so young..." And more than that... But there was no way Angela was going to admit-
"...ngela? Paging Doktor Ziegler. Angie are you there?"
"Oh?" Angela looked up, realizing that she had to have been lost in thought for several moments. "I'm sorry, I was..."
Fareeha smirked. "Yeah, you definitely need some food, and then some sleep. Come on."
"Well, alright."
...
Angela followed Fareeha to the kitchen, and after a simple dinner spent talking about more innocuous subjects – such as Lúcio meeting with child genius Efi Oladele in Numbani, and Mei testing an upgrade to her drone resulting in the entire workshop knee-deep in snow, much to Torbjörn's chagrin – Angela returned to her room, with the promise to Fareeha to get some sleep soon, and then she was alone with her thoughts again.
Hana. All of a sudden, it seemed almost inevitable. But... Angela had always prided herself on her rationality and level-headedness; it had to be nothing more than consequence, simple cause and effect. Yet, looking back, she didn't see any of that. All there was was a chain of memories, connecting then and now – connecting her and Hana.
And there truly was no denying it: The way Angela always felt when she was around the younger girl, how she enjoyed spending time with her, talking, and even the occasional teasing, just how worried she'd been about her these last few days, how Hana always managed to make her day a little brighter... all of it spoke volumes. For lack of a better word, Angela was in love with Hana.
...A girl half her age. And while she couldn't be truly called a child any more, Hana wasn't quite a woman yet either. But, how much 'younger' was she truly? Hana had made a lot of the same experiences as Angela had, even at an earlier age, and while she'd had to fight for it – just like Angela had back then –, by now she was mostly being accepted and treated as an equal, so why shouldn't she now?
But even that aside, there were still more ...practical issues. Like if Hana was even attracted to other girls at all, let alone a woman that much older than her. After all it wasn't like one could just casually ask about this, could one? 'By the way, I'm totally into women, what about you?' No way.
And Hana was so entirely different – yet so similar in some ways – from how how Angela had been at her age; while that probably was a great deal of what made her so ...refreshing, it also meant Angela just couldn't fathom the girl's feelings about her.
Worst case, if Angela were to... confess to Hana, and her feelings not requited, just what would happen? Would the pilot see her any differently all of a sudden? True, Hana was more open, more 'herself' around her than anyone else, without fear of being judged, so Angela not doing the same made her somewhat of a hypocrite, but this was different. She didn't want to endanger their friendship out of what ultimately amounted to selfishness.
Angela hadn't had a girlfriend since before she'd first joined Overwatch. After that, she'd rarely met the kind of person she would have been interested in, and even then, in light of her occupation and its hardships, Angela had just never allowed herself to ...fall in love. Soviel dazu.
But, what if Hana returned her feelings? If they... entered a relationship? What would something like this even mean for the both of them, given their situation? Overwatch didn't have any rules against fraternization – in fact a fair share of the original strike team's effectiveness had been owed to the strong personal bonds they'd quickly developed –, but still, there was such a huge gap in age and experience between them...
Then again, Angela had never shared the preconceived notion of relationships involving an age gap being inherently unhealthy or inappropriate, as long as the partners involved knew and consented to what they were getting into. And besides, in the past, had she ever cared about 'society's' or the public opinion of her or her work? But Mercy had always stood for her conviction and ideals, this was just Angela wishing to be selfish. ...What was the difference? Should there be a difference? ...If not, then just what was stopping her acting on her feelings?
Komm schon, gib es zu. Angela was afraid. Afraid of how things might change between her and Hana, afraid of somehow ruining their friendship. Afraid of losing her. There were just too many variables, too many unknowns. If she could just... But she couldn't, that was exactly it. Fareeha – or Hana, for that matter – would most likely tell her that if things worked out, it would well be worth the risk, but was Angela willing to take the chance it might not?
...No. The status quo was good enough, it had to. Trying to deny her feelings for Hana was pointless, Angela knew, but that didn't mean she had to act on them either. In fact a former colleague at the hospital had made her the dubious compliment that she was 'scary good' at rationalizing, internalizing or plain ignoring her own feelings – then again, said colleague had had a breakdown and left the occupation for good after failing to save a child that had been hit by a truck, so there had to be something to Angela's way of coping.
Of course, if she were to learn more about Hana's feelings, Angela would... reconsider, but for now what they had would suffice. Just friends, nothing more. It was better this way.
After finding the medbay deserted, Hana finally arrived at Angela's room, her hand just stopping centimetres away from knocking as she tried her best to calm herself and get rid of that uneasy feeling in her stomach. ...Quit stalling, coward. Hana knocked, standing with bated breath until after a few seconds Angela answered. "Come in."
Hana pushed open the door and all but rushed in, not looking at Angela's face and instead staring at the ground next to her feet as she took a deep breath.
"Look, I'm sorry-""Hana, I want to apologize-"
"I shouldn't have-""Angela, I-"
Hana finally dared look up, to find a mixture of emotions reflected in Angela's expression: worry, apology, but also relief. No trace of anger. "Me first. Please." She managed to get in before Angela could start again, and the medic nodded.
"Angela, I- I'm sorry for how I... acted before. I didn't realize how worried you actually were about me, so- I acted like a total child instead of... I-I'm..." Hana trailed off, stumbling over her own words; so much for preparing her apology ahead of time.
But Angela pre-empted her with a soft smile. "It's okay, Liebling. I have to apologize as well. I... overreacted, I shouldn't have gotten angry like that, and I never meant to- to doubt you or your skills. I am truly sorry."
Looked like she hadn't fucked up after all. Hana just barely managed to contain a huge grin of relief, keeping it to a small smile instead. "You had every right to get mad, I acted like a... I- I'm sorry." She walked up to Angela and carefully pulled her into a hug, however instead of letting go after a few moments, right now Hana couldn't help herself and kept her arms wrapped around the medic as she continued. "So, we good?"
"Yes." Hana noted how Angela wasn't making any move to break their embrace either. "We good. Vergeben und vergessen."
"Huh?"
"Forgive and forget."
"Hm." Hana finally pulled back, if solely for the reason that her position made it kinda impractical to talk, but she didn't fail to notice the hint of a blush on Angela's cheeks. "Isn't that saying kinda silly? I mean, forgive, obviously. But if you forget, wouldn't you just make the same mistakes again? So how about we don't forget this mess, so we don't repeat it?"
"Forgive, but don't forget?"
"I know, it doesn't sound as catchy, but..."
Angela smiled warmly. "Yes, let's do just that."
"Yeah." Hana grinned, feeling as if a huge weight had been lifted from her. "Hey, you remember that cool show I got you to watch with me? The season finale aired like yesterday, and I totally slept through it, but I managed to avoid spoilers so far, so how about we see if we can find the episodes somewhere online and catch up?"
"I'd love to."
Finally. I'm sorry for the wait, but the chapter was just massively long (easily the longest so far), so proofreading took a little longer. Also sorry to anyone who was hoping Hana's injury would serve as the catalyst for the two to get together; I mean, it catalysed *something*, but we're not quite there yet.
Containing more references as always, and some artistic license in regards to Hana's injury/medical care (which few people would even pay special attention to, so why am I pointing it out? But on a side note, Hana doesn't necessarily have an infection, preemptive antibiotics after serious injury/surgery are common enough). Also more characters show up and actually do something. I should note that when I started this story, Ana wasn't revealed yet, so I chose to keep her being in hiding and presumed dead as the status quo for now. On the topic of headcanons Fareeha and Angela have known each other for a while and are close friends, but nothing more; and McCree is like the ultimate bro who noticed Hana has a crush and is totally rooting for her (and I hope I didn't mess up his accent too bad).
You know this bit by know, thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed, la-dee-da, feedback, criticism, suggestions, etc.
Peace Out.
