What hurts the most.
It was a cloudy night, the vapors on the wind wetting Artemis' cheeks as she heard the cries of that infuriating son of Poseidon. It wasn't that he was annoying though, it was their situation. The moon chariot felt so empty without him next to her, talking the world and it's troubles away.
She wasn't bothered by the rain that started to rain on her, as though the clouds sensed her misery and was trying to make things worse.
What bothered her more was the fact that he was gone. Not GONE gone, but she would never see him again.
"You can't see him, Artemis. This is final."
"You can't make me not see him! It isn't fair!"
"What isn't fair is that you forced me to promise that you would not have to marry, and i consented. I dealt with you killing mortal and god alike in their attempts to woo you, and now you ask that i respect this of all things? This is madness, Artemis, and as your father i won't allow it."
"I'll go and see him anyways, you can't force me not to, i am not as beholden to the ancient laws as most gods."
"And i'll take away your Hunt, your family for the past two millennia. What was it that you imposed on them again? 'I swear off the company of men.'? You hypocrite."
I've cried before, i'm not afraid of doing it again.
Hippolytus, the first man who didn't make advances towards me or my Hunt. Callisto, who got pregnant and bore a male child, whom i didn't think twice about cursing. Orion, whose potential as a lover was destroyed by his maliciousness.
Artemis had cried before, and she would do it again for the man that promised himself to her endlessly, till the end of time.
She was fine, she could handle the fact that she would never see Percy again, never talking about their problems, whether mundane or serious. She would never be able to hear his laugh, like clear bells ringing. She would never be able to hear his sweet voice, bewitching like sirens; as all children of the sea are wont to have.
She could pretend that it didn't actually bother her that he was gone for eternity, that he would never get to see her again.
But what actually bothered her, what hurt her, down in her soul, was the fact that she had never told him how she felt.
"I have so much to tell you Percy, but i-" she choked, poison dripping from her lips like acid and her heart clenching.
"It's alright moonbeam, i understand. It's him, isn't it? Standing in the way between us?"
She nodded.
"I'll still be there, i don't care what kind of consequences i have to face, i'll be by your side-"
"He's going to take away my Hunt, Percy, i can't just give them up, stop giving them solace after they've been all that they have been-"
The tears fell.
"This will be our last talk, just please Percy, walk away. I don't think that i can handle it if you don't."
And so he walked away, that one time.
Without me having told him.
And that was before i realized.
I loved you with all of my being.
"An ancient vow?" Artemis looked scared.
"Yes, if Percy ever talks to you again, for longer than a couple of minutes, I will know and i'll have Apollo put a plague on the boy. It is settled."
"I don't want this!" the moon goddess cried out, tears streaming from her face.
Cold and hardened eyes glared back at her.
"This isn't up for debate, Artemis, you'll learn that the world isn't fair."
And so she learned. And her chest clenched every moment, for without him, she was what she had been before, not broken, for the goddess of maidenhood had never been broken, but she was not more anymore.
With Pearcy, she had been compassionate. She had someone who liked her snarky comments, someone who didn't judge her for not being perfect, who she could be herself around.
She had let a boy go who had entered their camp without killing him, all because she had known he meant no ill intent thank to Percy.
She would look at her Huntresses, at Thalia, and would hear the simple question that broke her heart.
"Where's Percy?"
Her fake smile faltered, and turning into a frown.
"He's… gone."
"Gone?"
"Zeus, he, he won't let him come near us, near me."
Thalia sat next to the goddess and comforted her.
Percy loved this dress, he said it matched her eyes.
Percy was gone, just like her heart.
If she had one more chance, she would tell him how she felt. If she could go back in time, she would choose him.
She would stand up to her father, declare her love for the raven haired man who held her heart.
Her hunt would stand by her. They knew Percy, they liked him. He was the second ever male to have their approval.
And now he was gone.
'Maybe not fully,' she thought, looking down unto the small forest path that her beloved walked, talking to her, proclaiming his loved and devotion to her.
'Even if we can't be together, Percy, i'll always listen to you, till the end, like you said.'
