WHAT IS THIS FUCKERY THAT IS MORE THAN 9K?
This is for my lovely fruit child who loved this head-cannon so much that I wrote it as a chapter!
This took an angsty turn and I swear to god I didn't mean it to? I'm just letting Marinette do her own thing and writing it out for you I swear I had 0 hand in the angsty back-story.
Also much thank you to Alyse because she helped me out with deciding to keep the angst... Maybe you won't thank her as I rip out your heart but hey, more fun for me :)
Mentions of blood in the introductory paragraph and a bit further on
17-Vengeance
Kim's grin grew Cheshire-Cat like and Marinette had the feeling that something very bad was about to happen. Maybe she should have found out what he wanted before making the bet.
Marinette was out for blood. The pavement was splattered with it but she couldn't be sure if it was hers or her victims. Behind her Alix laughed as the adult male cowered in front of the dark-haired girl. He clutched his broken, bloody nose, hunched over to protect his torso and stomach from another attack.
"Not so tough now are you big guy?" Alix jeered from Marinette's right. He flinched at the sound of her voice, but his eyes never wavered from Marinette.
Marinette lifted a foot lazily and kicked his ribs with surprising force for such little effort. The man stumbled back and fell, landing on his side, his hands immediately raised to protect his head; leaving Marinette with the perfect opportunity to finish what she'd started.
"Did it feel good?" She asked quietly. "What you did to that girl? Did it make you feel like a man?" She drew back her foot and kicked his stomach. He moaned in pain and pressed his hand to his stomach, shifting the other the cover his face in case she decided to aim there next. "Was it worth it?" She repeated, crouching beside him and grabbing his collar, her knuckles red and raw. He whimpered, unable to muster the strength to cover his face as her icy eyes bore holes into his brain, and Alix sneered in disgust at his gutlessness. Marinette shook him slightly, blue eyes narrow and blank. "I asked you a question. Was. It. Worth. It?" She hissed, punctuating each word with a shake. Her words were quiet and strangely empty, like she was detached from them. It was almost funny how often this happened, not the beating up adults part, but the whole; bully-is-actually-a-giant-coward-that-won't-even-stand-up-to-three-four-foot-fourteen-year-old-girls part.
"N-N-No." He moaned. His face was covered in his own blood, nose broken in two places, eye already swollen.
"I didn't think so." Marinette's usual venom was back as she shifted her grip so one hand was clenched at the top of his throat, pressing down on his windpipe, not enough to stop him breathing, but enough to scare him. "Don't you ever touch another person like that again do you hear me? Because we will find you. And next time..." She jerked her head back and the man's eyes darted to the two girls behind her. Alix grinned savagely from the right, while Rose flanked Marinette's left, her sweet smile permanently fixed on her face as though she were watching her favourite television program instead of a fourteen year old girl beat a grown man into submission. Marinette pressed down on his throat, effectively cutting off his oxygen supply. His eyes bulged in fear instantly, but he wasn't brave enough to try and move her hand away. "We won't be so nice." She finished before she threw him to the ground and stood, brushing at her jeans. He curled in on himself, hands protecting his head, knees tucked to his chest in case she decided to kick him again. But Marinette wasn't in the mood.
"Pathetic. Let's go." She turned up the collar on her jacket and walked out of the alley, shoving her hands in her pockets to hide her knuckles from passersby. Rose looped their arms and skipped happily beside her while Alix grabbed the back of Marinette's jacket and let herself be pulled along on her skates.
"Can we go have some cookies? That was hard work." Alix complained. "Plus I don't think you did enough Mar, he's a seriously fucked up dude. You heard what he did to that kid's younger sister."
"I hate doing that to people. Lucky most of our work isn't that rough." Marinette replied. "But cookies sound good."
"We're lucky your mum taught us martial arts!" Rose said breathily.
Marinette snorted. "We're lucky my mum lets us be in a 'gang' at all."
Max pushed his glasses up his nose and watched the two arguing boys without much interest. They'd been having the same argument for weeks. Kim thought Chat Noir was weak and Adrien swore he was stronger than anyone else. Kim thought Chat Noir was an idiot and Adrien thought he was intelligent. Today's argument was about Chat Noir's choice of costume.
"I'm telling you, Chat Noir is unfashionable!" Kim slammed his hand on the table. "He wears skin tight leather for crying out loud! And he has a belt for a tail. Ask Marinette, she'll tell you, Chat Noir is a walking fashion disaster!"
"I think the leather looks good." Adrien snipped before realizing his mistake. A cruel grin curled onto Kim's face.
"Dude." He smirked.
"No." Adrien shook his head violently. "Whatever you're thinking isn't true."
"You have a leather fetish!" Kim crowed gleefully, ignoring Adrien's spluttering. "Oh man I gotta tell Nino!" His laughter grew louder and he thumped his fist onto the table.
"Tell Nino what?" Nino rounded the corner, interest piqued.
"Your boy," Kim pointed a finger at Adrien dramatically. "Has a leather fetish!" He choked out before succumbing to the laughter once again.
"I do not have a leather fetish!" Adrien protested
"Remember when Marinette used to wear leather?" Nino asked grinning.
Kim sobered up immediately, his gleeful grin turning into something more sinister, hinting at a plot brewing behind his burning eyes. "Why yes, yes I do. Adrien," He turned to the blond boy. "You never had the pleasure of seeing our little Marinette like that, did you?"
"What?"
Kim rubbed his hands together and slung his arm around Max's shoulders. "Max, help me devise a plan, we've got to fix that injustice immediately."
Kim stood in front of Marinette with his arms folded. "I'm telling you I'm stronger and faster than you."
Marinette raised an eyebrow. "Really?"
The rest of the class sans Adrien, who was watching with keen interest, ignored their argument; Nino chatting with Alya while Rose and Juleka swapped lunch, Max calculating Alix's personal bests and Mylene and Ivan were making disgusting googly eyes at each other in the corner.
Kim rolled his eyes. "Yes really. I'll even bet you!" He slammed his elbow onto the table. "I'll arm wrestle you. If you win, I'll buy you lunch for a month!"
Marinette folded her arms. "Both Alya and myself." She said, catching Alya's attention. Alya turned in her seat to watch the argument unfold.
"Done." He offered a hand to her to seal the deal.
"Done." Marinette repeated, shaking his hand.
Kim's grin grew Cheshire-Cat like and Marinette had the feeling that something very bad was about to happen. Maybe she should have found out what he wanted before making the bet. "But if I win." His grin grew wider. Very, very bad. "The Fearsmol has to show up at school for the rest of the week.
Marinette choked on her own spit, Nino and Alya both started roaring with laughter, Rose and Alix fell into stunned silence, Mylene yelped in surprise and Sabrina spat out her juice in horror.
"What?" Marinette squeaked over Nino's laughter once she'd recovered. "You want the who to do what now?"
"The fear-what?" Adrien asked. Marinette's face turned a sickly shade of grey as she made eye contact with her crush. Nino sobered up immediately at the question.
"Bro you do not want to find out." He stage whispered, slinging an arm around his friend and leaning in to whisper in his ear. "Marinette used to-"
Alya hit him over the head with her notebook. "Don't say 'you don't want to know' and then tell him anyway!" She snapped before turning to Kim. "That hatchet was buried a long time ago Kim."
"She's already agreed!" He argued. "Besides I'm not asking her to do anything. It'd just be funny to see her like that again."
"Like what?" Adrien asked. He was very confused as to why everyone seemed to be almost afraid of Kim's request. And what was the fearsome anyway? "What's the fearsome?"
"It's the Fearsmol dummy." Alix called over to him. "And it's-" Rose launched herself over her desk and clamped her hand over the skater's mouth.
"We must protect him from the knowledge of the Fear- AH! Did you just lick me? Alix that's yucky!" She whined.
"You're just chicken." Kim taunted. "Because you know I'm right. Bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk!" He folded his arms into chicken wings and flapped them at her, causing Marinette to slap his elbows away.
"I'll kick your ass." Marinette snapped, folding her arms over her chest defensively.
"It was a lot scarier when you said that while wearing black and leather instead of pink and denim. Now fight me or you lose by default!" He put his elbow back on the table and wriggled his fingers. Marinette cast a glance over at Alix who nodded enthusiastically, a wide grin painted on her face and then at Rose who shrugged.
Marinette placed her hand in Kim's, whose giant fingers easily wrapped around hers. Nino placed his hand on top of theirs.
"One handed only, first one to pin their opponent wins. There will be no betting on winners today."
Alix moaned in disappointment and put her wallet away. "I was gonna bet on Kim."
"Hey!" Marinette complained.
"Sorry girl, that's business for you." Alix shrugged and the rest of the class gathered around Marinette's desk.
"Three. Two. One." Nino lifted his hand and Kim immediately exerted pressure onto Marinette's hand, his fingers tightening around hers, more than likely cutting off her circulation.
Marinette yawned. "Oh, have we started?" She grinned and returned the favour pushing on Kim's hand, his elbow bending back towards his side of the table. "I hadn't noticed."
Kim gritted his teeth and screwed up his nose before his left hand darted out from under the table and slapped Marinette in the face. It wasn't a hard slap by any standards, in fact it was more of a tap really, but the sudden movement and the unexpected contact distracted her enough that her arm went slack and Kim pushed against her so her arm fell back against the table.
"Cheat!" She cried, backed up by Alya, Nathanael and Rose's cries of outrage as she withdrew her hand and turned on the referee. "He totally cheated Nino! Call him out on it!"
Nino shrugged. "He technically didn't break the rules, I didn't specifically say 'no slapping' so he's in the clear."
"It goes without saying that you don't slap your opponent!" She protested.
"Sorry Marinette." Nino raised his palms towards her. "It won't be that bad, it's just for the rest of the week and it's already Tuesday."
The bell rang and the rest of the class shuffled back to their seats. Kim flicked one of Marinette's twin-tails and she snarled at him. "We all look forward to seeing you tomorrow chaton." He barked mockingly. Adrien turned around so fast he got whiplash at the word 'chaton' being used to address Marinette but instead of a reply or a much needed explanation she stuck her leg out as Kim passed and he tripped, falling on his face.
Marinette fidgeted with the collar of her jacket anxiously as she triple checked her phone. Alya had promised to walk her to school on time so her entrance wouldn't be overly dramatic, but it had been a year since she'd worn this jacket and the memories that came with it weren't all that great. She'd even had to wash dried blood of the sleeves before she'd worn it today. She'd received three messages but none from her best friend.
From: Rose
-Alix and I are waiting at the steps; we'll all go in together.-
From: The Asshole with Pink Hair
-don't b a pussy and back out-
From: Adrien 3
-Are you sure you don't want me to talk Kim out of it?-
Marinette sighed and ignored the first two messages, but a text from Adrien was too precious to ignore, even though they were good friends and she could now talk to him with ease.
To: Adrien 3
-Thought you were curious?-
She checked herself in the mirror and almost winced at her reflection. She looked menacing and dangerous. Though that was the point back then she thought bitterly. Her phone chimed twice.
From: Adrien 3
-Well yeah, but not at the expense of your comfort. You didn't seem all too keen about it yesterday...-
From: The Bae
-Get ur punk butt downstairs ur mum is about to make me third breakfast-
Marinette grabbed her old black and gold school bag and gulped. Ignoring Tikki's giggling; she opened the hatch and climbed down the stairs, her shoes clacking familiarly on the floor.
Alya laughed once when she saw her friend. "You look so good." She complimented. "Let's go yeah?"
Adrien adjusted the strap on his bag as he leaned against the wall, eyes glued to the bakery across the road.
"Chill man, she'll get here when she gets here." Nino slapped his friend on the back.
"I still don't get it."Adrien mumbled, unwillingly tearing his eyes away from the bakery door. "Is it like a club or something?"
Nino snorted and crossed his arms knowingly. "Or something." He glanced around, eyes falling on the two girls already waiting at the school entrance.
Rose stood with her hands clasped in front of her, rocking forwards onto her toes. She'd altered her style today, instead opting for a light pink, halter tutu dress that ended mid-thigh with a white ribbon tied around the waist, the bow at the side. Her feet encased in white sandals that looked very impractical, to Adrien at least and instead of her hair out and plain, a plait on either side of her face had been pinned back to hide underneath the rest of her hair.
Alix was beside her leaning on the brick wall, one foot resting on the wall behind her. Like Rose, she'd forgone her usual attire in favour of torn jeans, green converses and finger-less black lace gloves. Her hair was out and styled into a side swept look and it became apparent to Adrien that she was in fact, trying to grow out an undercut.
But what really got Adrien were the jackets. He'd seen those matching jackets in a picture before, though only for a second before Marinette had turned off her computer in embarrassment. Alix and Rose wore matching black leather jackets over their clothes. He'd managed to catch a glimpse of them as they'd walked past. On the back of Alix's jacket were thin purple and bronze wings, extended as though she were about to take flight while Rose's jacket had a pink and silver imprint of a rabbit foot. There was writing on the base of their jackets too, but he wasn't able to read it from this distance.
"The Fearsmol was a gang." Nino whispered, as though he were afraid someone would punch him for finally spilling the details that Adrien had been dying to hear. "I say was because they disbanded about a year and a bit ago. They helped out a lot, like they got rid of the bad crowds at school and stuff. It was just Alix, Rose and Marinette, but boy they were really something. Rose never really did much fighting unless-"
"Wait, fighting?" Adrien's eyes snapped back to his best friend.
Nino frowned. "Yeah, that's typically what you do in a gang. You kick butt. Now shut up and listen. So Rose was super quiet and never actually did a lot of the butt kicking unless they were stopping short of killing a man. She sucked at hand-to-hand combat, still does I think, but she was an expert at using weaponry, she could turn anything and I mean anything into a weapon. She's the 'White Rabbit.'" Nino paused to sip his energy drink.
"White Rabbit?" Adrien glanced over at the blonde again. She waved cheerfully when she noticed him looking and he offered a small wave in return. Could she really be that dangerous?
"Yeah, you know. Cute and fluffy until you piss them off?" Nino offered. "Alix gave her that name. I'm pretty sure Rose mainly patched them up after they did... W/hatever they did, and she stayed in the background, the trump card. Alix was more... Active. She was pretty good at gathering info about people and their situations and about other gangs in the area, pretty good in a fight too from what I heard. Marinette called her 'The Humming Bird,' tiny and full of anger. She was a total expert at knowing the human body. She'd memorised all the pressure points in the human body by the time she was nine You know that scar she's got on her knuckles? The one she's really proud of?" Adrien nodded. "Punched a dude with glasses right in the face and the glass shattered.." Nino coughed and touched a hand to his own glasses.
"What were they called again?"
"Fearsmol, like fearsome and small put together." Nino meshed his fingers together to illustrate his point. "Alix came up with it I think; they were all about four foot at the time." He took another swig of his energy drink and 'ahhed' in satisfaction. "They were really good together."
"Why did they disband then? If they were that good?" Adrien asked.
"Ah, it's not totally dramatic as you might think. The Fearsmol were vigilante. Once Ladybug and Chat Noir showed up and started stopping those petting criminals as well as the possessions, there was no need for them anymore and so Marinette formally disbanded them. They had a ceremony and everything. Even though they could have still helped out with playground bullying but you know, it was Marinette's call." He finished his drink and crunched the can before throwing it in the bin and missing.
"Why Marinette?" Adrien watched his friend pick up the can and put in the bin properly.
"Marinette was the leader. Boss as fuck and hot as fuck. That's when I started to like her you know? She was really strong and brave and somehow she managed to be super hot while kicking ass? So yeah, Marinette's a total bad-ass. She made their jackets and everything. Make sure you get a good look at them later, especially the backs, they're so awesome." Nino slung his arm around his friends' shoulder to whisper in his ear. "Rumor has it that she taught Chat Noir all his moves."
Adrien snorted. "No way."
"Yes way man! It's totally plausible too, I mean when she was a kid she did gymnastics and dance and her mum is legit a black belt in like two kinds of martial arts. Sabine's the one who taught the girls how to fight. They've all been friends since we were kids." Adrien shivered at the thought of Sabine Cheng unleashing her fury in the form of fighting.
"Chat Noir though?" Adrien raised an eyebrow. He was one hundred and fifty percent sure that Marinette hadn't taught him how to fight, but there had to be more reasoning behind it than their similarities in fighting style.
"Yeah bro it makes sense, Chat Noir is a black cat and Marinette was-."
Alix let loose a loud wolf-whistle, cutting Nino off. "Hot as fuck Marinette Dupain-Cheng." She yelled across the courtyard.
"Looking good Marinette!" Kim called cheekily from the bench.
Adrien and Nino turned to see the girl in question. The second they saw her, Nino's arm dropped from Adrien's shoulder as he straightened and Adrien felt his throat seize up.
"...The Black Panther." Nino choked out.
Marinette was striding across the courtyard like she owned it, her chin high and her mouth set in a line that screamed 'don't fuck with me,' her fingers hooked in the loops of her Rose and Alix, she'd switched her outfit for the day, but unlike the other two girls, her outfit was a drastic change from her usual choice of clothing. She was dressed all in black, skinny jeans and, under her gang jacket, a tight-fitting black shirt that hugged her frame perfectly, outlining her waist while the jeans drew attention to her legs that seemed much longer than they usually did. Her hair tumbled in loose waves around her shoulders, messy, like she'd just come back from the corner of a party with her boyfriend. Her black pumps clicked against the stone as she walked past groups of students, conversations ceased as she made her way over to the two girls standing at the front door. As she walked past, Adrien opened his mouth to greet her, and failed. Miserably, he was not even able to manage a sound. His eyes lingered on the black eyeliner that flicked upwards into what he knew to be a 'cat-eye' style. Had her eyes always been that blue? She sauntered up the steps confidently and he watched her hook her little finger with Alix and Rose before and Adrien registered Alya's presence beside him.
"You dropped something." She informed him.
Adrien ripped his eyes away from the dark-haired girl and cast a quick glance around the ground before meeting Alya's gaze. "No?"
"Your jaw." Alya winked and laughed at his flustered expression. "Don't pop a boner friend; you'll be suffering all day. And for the next two days." She snickered at his spluttering and walked away.
Nino raised an eyebrow at Adrien. "See what I mean bro?"
"I thought you liked Alya." Adrien murmured, his eyes fixated on the girl at the schools entrance.
"I do, doesn't mean I can't appreciate the return of The Black Panther."
"Uh-huh." Adrien watched as the three girls disappeared into the school building and he jolted in surprise as he realised that the bell had rung and he'd missed it. "Is that why Kim called her kitten yesterday?" He asked as he and Nino made their way up the stairs.
"Huh? Oh yeah. Ever since they disbanded, Kim likes to joke that Marinette has been domesticated. You know, like a cat."
"Right."
Adrien opened the door to the classroom and nearly stumbled as his eyes fell onto Marinette. She was in the process of removing her jacket almost like she was teasing him-even though it wasn't sexual at all and goddamn it, he shouldn't be having these thoughts about his friend-to reveal that the tight black shirt sat across her shoulders, rather than on top. The style exposed the tops of her shoulders and her collarbone. It wasn't technically a slutty outfit, it covered everything it needed to and she wasn't actually showing that much skin but for some reason, the knowledge that Marinette had freckles dusting her shoulders made Adrien race to his seat and place his bag in his lap.
Alix snarled as she threw herself onto her chair. "It's not fair." She growled, pushing her brown bangs out of her face.
Marinette stole a glance at Chloe, every inch of her the picture of the perfect angel Marinette knew she wasn't. "I know."
"Now Alya had to go home again." Alix bit the end of her ponytail. "She is always pretending she is sick when she is hurting. But the person who is sick is Chloe. Alya doesn't have
dirty skin, she doesn't!" She slammed her fist on the table for emphasis. Marinette grabbed her wrist and pulled it under the table as the teacher searched for the source of the sound. She wasn't happy either, Alya was her best friend and she was perfect the way she was, but there wasn't anything she could do about it until school was over for the day, getting angry would solve nothing. Besides, she was only five and going up against Chloe meant going up against her papa too.
"We should do something." Rose whispered behind her hand as the teacher turned back to the whiteboard. "Maybe we can tell Alya's maman?"
Marinette shook her head. "She works for Chloe's papa. Chloe might cause a fuss and then tante will get fired from his hotel."
Alix wrinkled her nose in confusion. "You call Alya's maman 'tante'?" She asked the brunette.
Marinete shrugged. "No grown-ups." She whispered. "Pinky swear?" She held out her hand.
Both Alix and Rose hooked their fingers around Marinette's.
...
Marinette tore the glove out of her friend's hand and threw it on the floor. "What are you doing? You stupid!" She screamed, snatching Alya's bleeding arm and blotting it with a towel. Alya's maman wasn't home, she had been working overtime at the hotel and her papa was out of town for a few days which left Alya home alone. Marinette had been right to check on her friend, as soon as she entered the small apartment she could hear the water running in the bathroom. She'd raced upstairs to find Alya bent over the bath, scrubbing desperately at her arm with a glove that was scratchy and hurt Marinette's skin the one time she'd used it.
"It won't go away." Alya replied quietly, staring at her arm. Marinette scowled and pulled her friend into a hug.
"It's not going to go away you idiot. It's you." She patted her friend's hair the way she petted her cousins' dog, unsure of how she should comfort her friend. "There's nothing wrong with you. It's just Chloe being awful." She assured her.
"But it's-" Alya began to protest. Her body was shaking and silent tears leaked out from the corner of her eyes.
"I think your skin is beautiful!" Marinette pulled back and gripped her friend by the shoulders. "It looks so pretty just like you and you're perfect how you are." And it was true, she'd always been envious of Alya's beautiful complexion but somehow Chloe made it seem like it was something that should be avoided.
Alya's lip trembled. "Really?"
Marinette forced a smile and ignored the droplets of blood that stood out on the white towel. "Of course!"
Alya gave her friend a shaky smile and hugged her again. Marinette patted her on the back, her mouth set in a thin line. Chloe wasn't going to get away with making her best friend bleed.
...
Marinette jolted awake with a gasp, disturbing Tikki who was resting on her stomach. Her eyes found the moonlight that poured through her glass hatch and she sighed. Tikki opened her eyes wearily and blinked groggily at her charge before crawling up to the base of her neck. "Are you okay Marinette?" She asked sleepily.
"Yep." Marinette forced her voice to remain even. "Just a dream."
"Another precognition?" Tikki asked, suddenly alert.
"No." Marinette stroked her Kwami's head thoughtfully. "A memory."
Tikki dozed off again, her tiny snuffles soothing Marinette's racing heart. She hadn't had that dream for a while now. Not since she'd become Ladybug. So why? Marinette shifted Tikki onto the mattress and crept down the ladder, her bare feet padding almost silently on the floor of her bedroom. Her pumps, kicked haphazardly to one side, sat almost innocently on the floor, her eyes roved the room, searching for the incriminating item that Marinette suspected was the source of the dream. Her jacket was slung over her desk chair and she inched towards it slowly as though it were really a wild panther that could come alive and devour her. When it didn't try to eat her she picked it up to examine it.
She'd made them a few years ago, and, at Alix's numerous requests, had continued to alter them as the three of them grew so that they would always fit. They were as black as her name suggested. The back of her jacket displayed two bright green cat eyes at top, between where her shoulder blades would be, piercing and alive, even in the dim light, they almost seemed to glare. A little lower, underneath her shoulder blades, almost in the centre of her back, but not quite, lay gold claw marks that crossed over one another as they dropped down to her waist and ended at the opposite side of where they started, stopping at the side seam of the jacket. They were jagged, like the jacket itself had been ripped open and Marinette hadn't sewn it back together. Below it, the place that would cover the small of her back, read 'The Black Panther' in Cabazon font. It had taken her much longer than she'd like to admit to learn to stitch in fonts, but she was glad she'd learned early on in her designing career. It made learning everything else much easier now.
She ran her finger along the high-backed collar as she turned it over and spread it out on her desk, nudging her mouse by accident and waking up her computer. The light reflected on the gold zippers on either side, much like, she noted with irony, the zippers on Chat Noir's suit, though The Black Panther had existed long before Chat Noir, so perhaps he stole his style from her. Besides, she could fit a lot more in her pockets; she'd made sure of that when she first designed them. It was the only thing the three of them could initially agree on; functional pockets in which you can fit more than just a tissue and some lint. Her name was in her own neat, gold, cursive handwriting over the right breast, big enough to be seen from a distance but small enough that it didn't take away from the rest of the jacket. It had been Rose's idea, to have their real names on their jackets too, in their own hand writing style. That's why Alix's had come out in an odd sort of purple chicken-scratch and Rose's had turned out in magenta with the 'o' in the shape of a blooming rose. The jacket zipped all the way up to the side-winged collar that had taken her more than a week to get right and even as she examined it she could find tiny mistakes in the stitching that she wouldn't make if she were to re-create the jackets now.
Marinette sighed and sat in her desk chair, hands running over and over the zipper on one of the pockets, her eyes wandered to the screen saver that she hadn't changed yet. Herself, Alix and Rose, arms linked, smiling, just a few days before they disbanded. The day Marinette received her Miraculous.
Alix was perched on the edge of Nino's desk chatting happily with Alya about some new TV show by the time Adrien arrived. He slipped into his seat silently and fixed his eyes on his papers, even though class hadn't started yet. He'd been feeling uneasy all morning and he was yet to figure out why. At one point he'd thought it was because Nathalie had maybe given him her skinny, double shot latte instead of his full-cream decaf with sugar and extra cream that the chef slipped him whenever he could, but no, he'd been feeling anxious before he'd even seen his coffee that morning. Whatever had him so nervous had been plaguing him since he woke up. His churning stomach accompanied by Plagg's constant snickering made him glance up at every sound, waiting for the universe to strike him down.
"Hey Adrien." Alya's voice made him turn and he quickly schooled his features into something that resembled a normal expression. "Did you watch the news last night? Ladybug totally kicked ass right?"
Adrien's worry slipped away at the thought of his Lady. She'd certainly done very well in their latest escapade, in fact, she'd done a little too well, and she'd taken down three of their regular, non-akumatized opponents before he could even blink. And she'd shown little to no mercy to boot. Unfortunately, she'd zipped away before he could question her on her new choice of battle tactics. As he engaged in the conversation about how amazing Ladybug was, complete with admiring Alya's footage, his anxiousness slipped away until he forgot that he'd been nervous at all
"Good morning Adrien." The anxiety slammed back into him full-force and he spun around in his seat so fast that he nearly fell off his chair. Her voice was smooth and silky, an unintentional purr. Ah, he thought faintly, that's why. Marinette greeted Alya and Alix in turn, her deep purple lipstick a stark contrast to her pale skin but somehow matched the dark tresses that framed her face. Today she'd abandoned the skin-tight shirts and instead wore a loose light gray singlet with denim shorts. Not so bad, just don't stare... What the hell? Adrien frowned at his line of thought which screeched to a halt as Marinette dropped her bag on the floor and hoisted herself up onto his desk. He scrambled to move his papers as she crossed her legs, studiously looking away from the stockings she wore under her shorts.
"Good Morning." He whispered hoarsely.
She frowned. "Do you have a sore throat or something?"
"What? Ah no..." He covered his mouth to cough into his palm. "No. Just had a frog in there." He laughed weakly at his joke and was rewarded with a smile as she accepted his excuse.
Alix engaged her in conversation a second later and he breathed a sigh of relief as he was afforded a reprieve from the bright eyes that burned him. Nino sauntered in a moment later and immediately shoved his headphones over Adrien's head, demanding he listen to his latest mix. The bell rang and Marinette slipped off his desk and sat in her own seat behind him. He tried to ignore her, he really did, but as she'd walked past her scent hit him like a train. It wasn't the same as usual; florally with a tiny bit of peach that he knew came from her perfume because he'd seen the bottle on her vanity last time he had been at her house. No, it wasn't sweet and innocent, today she was all musk and leather and it was so enticing that every toss of her hair sent a new wave of her rolling towards him, preparing him for ; Death a la Marinette. He was hyper-aware of her every movement, every shift of her body, the clink of her zipper against the table when she leaned over to whisper to Alya, the soft scratching of her pencil as she sketched. It was completely and utterly ridiculous.
She felt herself dozing off; there was nothing interesting to keep her awake today. It was easy to ignore how beautiful Adrien was today; easy to talk to him and look him in the eye, all she had to do was lose herself in her old self, the one that thought only of desired outcomes, not of the consequences or how far she'd have to go to get there. It was scary how easy it was to revert back to how she was before. Sickeningly easy.
...
"You want to learn martial arts?" Sabine asked as she placed a rack of buns on the shelf, pretending not to notice when Alix swiped one. "Whatever for?"
"To protect Alya maman!" Marinette whined, following her mother into the kitchen as she picked up another rack of freshly baked goods. "Me and Alix and Rose. We want to protect our friends!" Sabine handed her daughter the flat boxes to place near the counter as they headed back into the shop.
Sabine regarded her daughter for a moment, her eyes roving to the auburn haired Alix chewing furiously on an iced bun to Rose, calming sipping a glass of milk, legs crossed delicately. "If I teach you. If!" She added when Alix cheered. "You are not allowed to abuse what I teach you. You must not threaten anyone with it, or use it to show off. It's for self-preservation only! It's not something that should be undertaken lightly do you understand? I suppose I'll have to teach you different styles so you're not all going to-" She broke off as Alix and Marinette threw themselves at her.
"Thank you maman!"
"Thanks!"
...
Marinette blinked blearily and glanced down at her knuckles and jerked in surprise when she saw them covered in bloody scratches. Her sudden movement attracted the attention of both Alya and her teacher as her tablet was sent flying off the table, hitting Adrien in the back of the head. He handed it back to her, concern painting his features.
"Sorry." She whispered, unable to find the strength to apologise properly.
"Turn around please Adrien." The teacher chided gently.
He did so, eyes lingering on her face a little longer than necessary as he turned to face the front. Are you okay? Alya mouthed. Marinette stiffly nodded in affirmation as she ran her fingers repeatedly over her knuckles, now smooth and blood-free. When the bell rang to signal the end of class, Marinette was the first one out the door.
...
"Don't push me." Alix growled, lunging forward and sinking her thumb into the pressure point between the man's index and thumb.
...
Why wouldn't the memories leave her alone?
Rose found her ten minutes later, hunched over a sink in the girl's bathroom struggling to breathe. She helped Marinette out of her jacket to cool her down and steered her to a cubicle just before Marinette threw up. Pushing her dark hair out of her friend's face, Rose sent a quick text to Alya and Alix.
To: HB, Alya
-Found. Second floor bathroom.-
She held Marinette's hair as she shuddered over the toilet bowl, offering her paper to dab at her mouth. The brunette took it gratefully and wiped the bile from her chin and lips, smearing her lipstick in the process. Rose's phone chimed.
From: HB
-Omw-
From: Alya
-Should I come?-
Rose hesitated. Alya was Marinette's best friend, but there really wasn't anything she could do. There wasn't anything any of them could do, especially with Marinette refusing to talk about that.
To: Alya
-It's a FS thing-
Alya didn't respond. A knock on the locked cubicle door jolted Rose from her thoughts as she reached up and unlocked the latch from her position on the ground. Alix slid into the now very cramped toilet cubicle and passed a water bottle to Marinette.
"Always heaving up your guts, hey kitten?" She teased, patting her hair. Marinette smiled weakly at the endearment and gulped the water so fast that Alix snatched it out of her hands. "Sips Marinette, we've been through this before. Drink too fast and you'll be sick again." Marinette nodded and reached for the bottle. Alix crouched on the ground near the door and placed her hand on Marinette's shoulder. "You've got to let it go, it's not good for you. Look at what it's doing to you."
Rose patted her knee in agreement. "It wasn't you fault and it's all better now." Marinette ignored them and continued to drink. Rose opened her satchel and pulled out her makeup bag. She crawled over to Marinette, settled between her legs and began to fix the dark purple mess that had once painted her lips.
"Dude it was like a year ago." Alix flexed her arm to illustrate her point. "See? Total movement, total control and no pain." When Marinette didn't respond she sighed. "Look, we know why you called us to disband and we're not pissed about it. But this guilt Marinette..." She ran her hand through her pink hair in agitation. "You've got to let it go."
Marinette shook her head. "You don't get it."
Alix growled in frustration. "Then fucking tell us so we understand. There's something missing to this whole thing isn't there? Something you haven't told us?" Marinette didn't answer and instead ducked her head to rest on her knees, hiding her expression from the two girls.
Rose shot Alix a look before sitting back on her heels. Marinette's lips were their regular shade of pink, no trace of purple lipstick or vomit in sight. Rose stood and placed the soiled toilet paper in the toilet and flushed before sliding back down to sit opposite Marinette. "It's okay you know." She whispered. Marinette raised her head to see Rose extending her little finger towards her. Alix locked her finger with Rose's and after a second's hesitation, Marinette did the same.
The period after lunch dragged on for both Marinette and Adrien. It was Physics, and even though it was Adrien's favourite subject, he was unable to concentrate. Marinette had returned to class without her lipstick and even though she'd obviously been distressed, he wondered if someone had kissed it off her. He snuck glances at her occasionally, careful to avoid attracting the attention of his teacher and both Nino and Alya. Her hair had been pulled up into a messy, stubby ponytail at the base of her neck, her bangs pinned back out of her face. His second not-so-sneaky glance revealed to him that she had deep purple bruises under her eyes from lack of sleep that her make-up could not hide. His third and fourth peeks told him that her neck and ears were flushed and that she was no longer wearing her jacket, nor was it anywhere in sight. Unfortunately the fifth time he looked back, he found out that even though Marinette's usually sparkling blue eyes were bloodshot and dull, they could still send shivers down his spine when she caught him staring at her.
"This is like the sixth time you've looked at me in the past ten minutes Adrien." She placed her chin in her palm and leaned forwards on her elbow.
"I counted seven." Alya whispered, not even looking up from her tablet.
"Five, actually." Nino murmured, keeping his eyes on the teacher, lest she turn around and give them all detention for talking during her class.
Adrien fumbled for an excuse. "I-uh-Your lipstick..." He finally managed to speak coherently but he nearly smacked himself at the words that spilled from his lips. Out of all the suggestive-
"I wiped it off." She replied smoothly. "It wasn't working for me."
"Oh." Adrien said dumbly before turning around and returning to his Physics notes. He gave Nino a swift kick under the seat as he snickered.
The bell rang and Marinette took her time to collect her things. She was in no hurry to return to her house, not when her house promised calmness and sanctuary. Calm invited mindlessness and vacancy which paved the road to remembering things she didn't want to remember.
"Marinette?" She jerked up at the sound of her name and was greeted with green eyes. "Are you okay?"
Marinette smiled. "I'm fine Adrien." He bit his lip. She obviously wasn't fine but it wasn't his place to pry. Her voice was soft, broken almost, not like the tone she'd been using earlier that day when she'd greeted him or even just before when she'd teased him about staring.
"Aw." Kim crooned as he walked past. "Isn't the Panther feeling well?" He ruffled Marinette's hair and snorted.
"Bite me." She snarled; leaning forwards into a predatory crouch, startling Kim who hastily stepped back. Alya gripped her friend's arm, causing Marinette's spine to snap straight as she blinked rapidly, a bemused expression on her face.
Kim raised his palms to her in surrender. "Sorry."
"I don't go by that name anymore Kim." She said quietly as she swept her hand across her desk, successfully catching all her belongings in her bag before slinging it across her shoulders and exiting the room.
Alix punched Kim in the shoulder. "Nice going asshole." She hissed. "This is all your fault.
"How was I supposed to know she was still torn up about it?" He paused and blanched as Alix winced and moved to grip her shoulder. "Sorry, that wasn't the best choice of word."
The two continued their argument that meant nothing to Adrien but seemed to have their remaining classmates riveted.
Adrien stared at the door where Marinette had just exited before spotting the stylus for her tablet on the ground. He pounced on it. It wasn't the best excuse to go and see her, but it was better than nothing.
Sabine noticed him the second he walked in the door. "Adrien!" She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him. "How are you?" She asked cheerfully once she'd pulled away. "Marinette's upstairs if you're looking for something sweeter than what we have down here." She winked at his flustered expression before pushing a box into his hands and giving him a friendly push towards the back door.
Adrien's feet felt heavy as he walked up the stairs. What was he supposed to say? What was he even doing here? But most importantly; Was she okay? He knocked on the door and waited for it to open. When it didn't immediately open, he rummaged through his bag for her stylus. He'd just placed it on the ground in front of the door when it opened.
"Ah! Marinette!" He forced out as he straightened up, almost brushing his body against hers as he did so. "I just... You... Here." He shoved the pen into her hands. She looked down at the pen, and an awkward silence followed. "I'd better go..." He laughed, raising his hand to scratch the back of his head.
"Thanks." He put his hand down as she whispered her thanks, taking in her appearance. She'd changed into a loose baseball style shirt and sweatpants, her hair wet and curly, from the shower he realized, her face free of makeup. There was something insanely sexy about Marinette like this, her fresh from the shower, unable to hide behind make-up and causal clothes, it felt intimate, like this would be how her lover would see her in the morning. "Do you have anywhere to be?" She asked suddenly. He shook his head and she stepped aside. "Do you want to come in? I was about to make some tea." He stepped into the living room without hesitation and the door clicked shut behind him.
Halfway through his cup of tea he had to ask. "Are you okay Marinette?" She glanced over at him in surprise.
"Fine. Why?"
"In class... You seemed... You know..."
"Ah." She put her cup down and screwed up her nose in distaste. "I haven't worn that jacket in a long time. It brings back unpleasant memories."
"Something about Alix?" He asked and immediately wished he hadn't. Her posture changed into something much more defensive and her top lip curled back into a snarl, her face drained of its colour.
"Did Kim send you?" She hissed.
"What? No!" He put his cookie down and held his hands up to her. "I didn-"
"What are you playing at? Some kind of sick game to keep asking me until I tell you? Who put you up to it?" She continued, standing now as she gripped the edge of the counter with white knuckles. "How dare you!" She snarled.
"No games Marinette! And no-one put me up to anything! I just thought you weren't feeling well and I came to see if you were okay. I promise!"
Her furious expression melted into horror as the fire left her eyes and she slumped back into her chair. "I'm so sorry." The words were muffled by her arm but he heard them anyway. Feeling brave he placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.
"Sorry."
She looked up at him horrified; face still flushed from her outburst. "No, God no, don't be sorry. I just... It wasn't great. It was an accident but she shouldn't have been there. I mean there was no way she could have known about Ladybug but possessed people are different from regular people and it wasn't fair what happened to Alix and Ladybug should have been able to stop it from happening but she didn't and so I had to disband us because what if she tried to do it again? And I couldn't deal with the guilt and I-"
"Shit Marinette, breathe." She sucked in a breath and let it out noisily. "I have no idea what you just said." He told her honestly. "If you want to tell me, that's cool, if not, that's okay too."
She shook her head and crammed a cookie in her mouth.
"No? Then I have a serious matter to attend to." She frowned as a shit-eating grin spread itself onto his face. "I have to kick your butt at that new video game you got last week."
The afternoon stretched into evening, Marinette's fairy lights were lit and Tom and Sabine had made several trips upstairs to feed them. The screen announced Marinette's sixth victory as Adrien groaned in defeat and reached for a cookie.
"Can I tell you?" Marinette whispered, speaking for the first time in the past hour.
"Tell me what?" Adrien asked through his cookie, green eyes lighting in realisation as they found her face. "About Alix?" Marinette nodded."Only if you want to. Talking can help sometimes." He moved closer to her, shoulders a breath apart, a distance she could close if she wanted, or needed to.
"So." She cleared her throat. "Um. I'm not sure if you remember the first time Ladybug was seen by the public?" Adrien nodded, confused. Of course he remembered. He hadn't received his Miraculous yet, and wouldn't for another six months, but he was already smitten with the red and black heroine.
"And the um, Akuma. It wasn't a very nice one." This was true, he remembered it well, a butcher Akuma who forced Paris to go into lock-down. The very first Akuma seen by the public and people didn't know how to deal with it, especially with cleavers and steak knives that tore anything on sight.
"Well..." She took a shuddering breath and buried her face in her knees, words spilling out desperately like water escaping from her lungs so that she could breathe. "Alix and Rose thought they could stop it and the Akuma went after them. He... he sliced through Alix's shoulder and her arm just... came off." The way she phrased it was anti-climatic, but Adrien knew it was everything but that. "Ladybug fixed it and there isn't even a scar but it was so dangerous and I had no idea that they were doing such stupid stuff behind my back and I couldn't help but think they'd do it again and so I disbanded them so they wouldn't do anything like that again, and it's Ladybug's fault that Alix had to go through something like that because she wasn't quick enough to defeat the Akuma and it was so scary and there was blood everywhere and Alix had nightmares about it for months and I still dream about it and-"
"Breathe." He reminded her gently. She did, taking deep, shuddering breaths that jerked her shoulders. He awkwardly placed an arm around her shoulders, unsure of how to comfort his distressed friend. Crying he could deal with, but this was something else.
"And it's entirely my fault because if I hadn't formed the group in the first place it never would have happened." She buried her face in her hands and drew her knees closer to her chest.
"Oh, Marinette..." He pulled her closer and patted her hair, still not sure on the best course of action to soothe her. "It's not your fault." She pressed her face into his shoulder. "Or Ladybug's fault." He added. "It's no one's fault."
"But it still happened." She whispered. She wasn't crying, but she was struggling to breathe and her body was shaking with the effort it took to draw the ragged breaths. He pushed her shoulders back so she was sitting upright.
"Breathe Marinette. Just breathe okay?" She nodded shakily but her breathing didn't improve. Instead she tried to breathe faster, the breaths now shallow and quick, her hands shaking as the gripped his biceps for support. Adrien recognised these breaths, and the shaking hands. "Marinette, it's okay. It's okay." He titled her chin up, moving to cup her cheek with one hand before resting his forehead against hers. "You need to breathe. You're panicking." He made sure he kept his voice low and quiet, the way Gorilla used to, though the forehead touching wasn't a technique his chuffer had used but he could tell that Marinette needed the physical reassurance as well. "Breathe with me okay?" He inhaled and exhaled to the rhythm he'd learned after his mother's disappearance and after a few minutes, she was breathing properly again even though her hands were still unsteady. Her breath fanned his face and he felt guilty for thinking about how easy it would be to kiss her now, their lips only inches apart. He pulled away. "Are... Are you okay?"
"I'm so sorry."
Ah, the apology, she was probably feeling embarrassed about her display and guilty that she'd put it all on him. At least if she was apologising, she was feeling better. "It's okay, really." He moved his hands from her leg and cheek to take hold of her hands. "I understand. I do. That's a lot for you to be holding on to. But Alix is okay and you're okay." He gave her hands a gentle squeeze. "Besides, Ladybug and Chat Noir know what they're doing, they're getting really good at it now and they'll keep us all safe no matter what. Right?"
She nodded, eyes darting down to their joined hands before flitting back up to his face. "Thank you and... I'm sorry."
He grinned. "It's not an issue Marinette. That's what friends are for." She looked surprised and he frowned. "We are friends right Marinette?"
"Yes!" Her face broke into her trademark smile and Adrien had to resist the urge to squish her cheeks. "Yes we are!"
"That's good."
There was a small silence in which Adrien remembered to let go of Marinette's hands and Marinette picked up their controllers again to start a new game.
"Will you still wear your Panther outfit tomorrow?" He asked.
Marinette shrugged. "It doesn't really suit me up I guess a bet is a bet."
"I think you'd look good even if you wore nothing." He replied without thinking. Then, as his words sunk in he turned to her horrified. "I did not mean it like that!" He yelled over her laughter.
Adrien think before you speak that's how you got into this mess in the first place?
What was this fuckery? I don't know. I don't know anything anymore. Drop a review and let me know if you're interested in seeing more of the Fearsmol because I have more crap about them than I have about anything that happened in cannon.
400+ followers? HOW DARE YOU ALL READ THIS TRASH THAT IS LITERALLY SHITPOSTING AND FUCKERY! I LOVE YOU ALL OMG I CRI
18-Love (MY TIME HATH ARRIVED)
