"This is my fault."

"Shinozaki, don't."

"It is! I did this. I did this everyone. I did this to you..." A catch in Ayumi's voice raised. Yoshiki was still.

Ayumi panicked at his lack of movement. "Kishinuma?" She said alarmed.

"I'm okay..."

Ayumi held Yoshiki close keeping her hand over his bloody knife wound. She listened to his heavy breaths one after the other. He felt her skin, her body warmth holding him.

"What happened Kishinuma? Did you trip?" A part of Ayumi already knew the answer. "Tell me you tripped you're always so clumsy. You're always so stubborn you know that Kishinuma. Why did you have to be so stubborn?"

Yoshiki hardened his voice."Talk about stubborn! Did you want to die? Is that it. If that's what you want Shinozaki, then yeah, I tripped." There was an edge to his voice.

"I didn't want you to help me! I didn't want anyone to get hurt because of me!"

"I don't give a shit! I wasn't about to let her take you." Yoshiki's tone shifted down again." Ha...I'd die before I willfully let that happen."

Ayumi's voice was blank. "Kishinuma that's not funny." She looked at the blood that was starting to drip down onto the floor and let out her frustrations. "Why Kishinuma? You would have been fine!"

Yoshiki didn't relent. "And you wouldn't be!" He said it so matter-of-factly, like he didn't understand the severity of the situation, like he didn't understand he was dying. And that's what Ayumi couldn't understand.

Her voice was almost childish. "Who cares about me!"

"I do." There was a moment of silence. "I don't want you to blame yourself if I die." He tried not to sound scared but he was.

"You're not going to die."

"If I do... I don't care how bad you feel it wasn't you."

"It was because me that you got hurt. I just don't understand. Why would you do that..."

"No Shinozaki you're not listening. It wasn't because of you... it was for you...my choice, there's a difference." Yoshiki couldn't be sure why he was deciding to say all of this now. It seemed so easy now that he might be dying and he wondered why it couldn't have been easy before. "No matter what I want you to make it out. You deserve to make it out." He added determinedly.

Ayumi shook her head and for so many reasons tears streamed down her face. Yoshiki realised she wasn't going to say anything.

"Shinozaki you made my life better. You saved me. No matter what that's what matters." And he laughed. "I guess if I'm going to die then I wouldn't want to be with anyone else."

"What are you saying you're not making sense." It must be the blood loss, he didn't know what he was saying. "Don't die Kishinuma you can't." A huge part of Ayumi couldn't bare to be alone right now. The thought of the dreadful silence that could follow made her body go cold.

But he was making perfect sense. He was finally making sense. No attitude, no facade just his last honest confession. "Shit it's cold." And he was cold, and tired as well.

"Kishinuma..."

He stopped her from saying anything. "I'm not scared anymore. It's not me I've been rooting for." He smiled weakly but sincerely.

Ayumi sounded even more pained now. "Stop."

"You'll be okay. I promise."

Ayumi sobbed louder. He was wrong she wouldn't be okay, not all alone like this. She finally found her words. "No you'll be okay. You can't be the only one who gets to make promises. You'll be okay ... I promise."

Yoshiki was adamant. "And if I'm not it's okay."

"Kishinuma!" Ayumi raised her voice. She wished he would stop trying to make her feel better, if anything it was worse. She wanted him to blame her, to spit his words at her, to tell her the truth; that everyone of their friends deaths was her fault and that she'd deserve to carry that burden.

But still Yoshiki remained convicted. "Leave me if you have to."

"I won't do that." How could she possibly let herself be responsible for another of her friends deaths? The death toll was already high enough.

"If i'm too weak if I can't move..."

She counted the blood of 6 of her friends including Ms Yui that was on her hands and then she added another two because she had an awful feeling Seiko and Yuka were never coming back. "All you have to do is say the ritual and then we'll be home."

"But if I can't..."

"You will, you have to." Ayumi looked down at Yoshiki who was paler than ever. "Promise me."

"I..." He started but stopped himself.

"Promise." She insisted.

"So bossy you know that."

Ayumi actually laughed. Something she didn't know she could do anymore. "Shut up idiot." She gave him another look, he looked so tired. She thought it might be weird but what did it matter now? Ayumi drew her hand through his hair. Maybe it was shock that was making her act this way. Shock over the death of Satoshi - the boy she loved. And maybe Yoshiki was just a substitute for him. Or did she really care about him now? Not just because she was grateful but because she saw him now. Because she was truly scared her friend might die? Only Ayumi really knew the answer.

Despite his deliriousness Yoshiki could truly enjoy this moment. He kept talking, it was all coming out now and decided there was no reason to stop half way. "I owe you so much."

Ayumi replied without pondering what he actually meant by that. "I think it's me who owes you now."

"You mean because I tripped?" He joked. Ayumi didn't say anything. "I'd never hold anything against you." He grinned.

Ayumi barely held in a loud sob. "How did this happen?"

Yoshiki answered all too casually. "I don't know, fate maybe."

"Fate?! This was our fate!?"

"I like fate."

"How could you-" Yoshiki didn't cut her off, she just didn't know how to finish.

Nevertheless he understood the question. "I met you through fate."

"I thought you didn't believe in stuff like that."

"Guess what a few hours ago I didn't believe in ghosts either."

"Seems you should start listening to me."

"Ha, yeah maybe, but not all the times. You're too selfless."

Ayumi was genuinely shocked. "Selfless! I'm anything but!"

"Don't put yourself down..."

"You're different Kishinuma."

"Different from what you thought?"

"Yes but I mean...the things you're saying it's not you, it's not how you talk."

"No, just how I think."

"It's the blood loss."

"You're right...nothing left to lose so why not tell the truth."

Ayumi shook her head. "Stay awake." She promptly reminded him.

"Talk to me then."

"What do you want to talk about?"

"You tell me something. What do you want to do? In the future I mean."

"It doesn't matter now." Ayumi sounded deflated.

"It matters to me." It was the truth.

Ayumi drew a breath. "...I want to be an illustrator. I want to draw and sketch and paint...maybe even design book covers, or make my own art. My parents never approved much but...it's what I want." Despite her lack of hope for survival Ayumi still said want instead of wanted.

Yoshiki wondered about his own parents. Who would break the news of his death to them? Would they care? "Hmph good for you. Parents have no right to tell you to stop being interesting."

Ayumi smiled.

"I would have liked to see you draw something."

"I'll draw you whatever you want Kishinuma."

"I want you to draw whatever you want...whatever makes you happy"

"I'll draw you whatever will make me happy then." She spoke softly.

"Thank you."

Why did it have to be she was only seeing this side of him now? Why did it take this much horror to see past the gruff outspoken delinquent she knew of so well? "That means we have to make it back. I'll even let you watch me draw and I never let anyone do that." It was true, she never did and she blushed at the thought.

"Oh now I just feel entitled."

"Ha stop it."

They fell silent.

Ayumi had a thought. "What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Kishinuma what do you want?"

"You'd slap me if I told you."

Ayumi went silent. She may have been clueless for all this time but she couldn't ignore what she was hearing now. Could Yoshiki truly be suggesting what it sounded like he was suggesting?

Yoshiki looked up at her, into her eyes scanning for a reaction. To see if she understood.

Ayumi brought the conversation back around. "Where did you see yourself in the future?"

Yoshiki tried to sigh but found it wasn't as easy when each breath was a challenge. "Not far to be honest. I was never going to be anyone important and never going to do something important. Probably not even something I liked but I didn't care. It is how it is."

The thought made Ayumi sad. "What makes you happy...?"

"Once again you'll slap me."

"You're not serious you're joking how can it be-"

"How can it be you? Because you're everything. I already told you you saved me."

Saved him. Saved him how? Ayumi really had no idea what he meant. She could see his eyelids trailing down. "Kishinuma don't." Her voice cracked. "Please don't." Her voice didn't sound desperate, it sounded serious.

"Trying my best here." He said this in his more recognisable cynical tone.

"Shinohara will be here soon and we'll go, we'll go and I'll draw you something and-" Her voice trailed off into a sob.

Yoshiki weakly lifted his hand and wiped her tears. She didn't reject it.

"Can't wait." He said

She smiled though her vision was blurry from the tears.

Yoshiki wasn't sure if she saw him smiling back.


A distant voice echoed through the halls. "Shinozaki! Kishinuma!" The sounds of two separate pairs of shoes clattered on and off the floor. Hand in hand Seiko was running back to her friends with Yuka by her side.