5.
Neville was having an off day. He awoke to Seamus and Dean whispering furiously to one another while throwing furtive looks at Ron's bed. When they noticed Neville watching them with a confused expression on his face, they nodded him over. *Sigh* He really wanted to stay in bed until the last possible minute, but it seems that wasn't to be. He got out of his warm and cozy bed and hopped up next to Dean. Seamus didn't even wait for him to ask what was going on. He just launched right into the rather convoluted explanation.
Last night Ron was beating Harry at chess (as usual) while Hermione pretended to be doing homework. So far so good. However, Dean had told Seamus that Ginny had told Dean that Hermione had told Ginny that Hermione thought something odd was going on with Ron. Hermione had noticed Ron acting suspiciously, and since Hermione Granger did not take kindly to confusing or mysterious situations, she obviously needed to investigate. Hermione had asked Ginny if she knew of anything, and when Ginny indicated none of her brothers told her anything, Hermione asked Ginny to let her know if she found anything out. Hermione also asked Ginny not to tell anyone. Ginny agreed. And then Ginny told Dean. Ginny asked Dean to keep a lookout for her brother, because if he was up to something then it would be nice to have some dirt on him in case he found them shagging. Also, it was always best to stay in Hermione's good graces. Neville silently agreed with this. Once Dean found out, he decided to involve Seamus, since if one head was better than two, then three were better than two. Although at this point it would seem four heads were involved. And Seamus wasn't known for being able to keep a secret. But, Seamus was known for getting secrets out of others, one way or another. So Dean told Seamus and asked Seamus to not mention Dean, Ginny or Hermione in his information gathering. Seamus assured Dean he was the soul of discretion, and then promptly went over and talked to Ron.
Luckily at this point Hermione really was doing her homework, and Harry was staring at some piece of parchment, muttering about good looking idiots who think they don't have to obey curfew. Seamus went off track here, stating his opinion rather emphatically that Harry was obviously shagging someone, and wouldn't it be funny (and hot) if they could catch him in the act? They'd be set for life in terms of blackmail material. Dean rolled his eyes and suggested that based on Harry's reaction last week, when both Dean and Seamus had caught Harry wanking in plain sight in the dorm when he thought nobody else was around, Harry quite enjoyed being an exhibitionist. It wasn't until after the fact that Harry's embarrassment had surfaced. Dean was quite sure Harry's response to any blackmail attempts would be two quick fingers. Seamus eyes got misty, and mentioned that their little Harry was growing up. Dean rolled his eyes at the dramatics and reminded Seamus that Harry wasn't exactly little. Seamus wagged his eyebrows and decided that Neville needed a better visual of exactly the situation they'd walked in on last week. Seamus didn't get very far before Neville's face was burning red, and Dean, taking pity on Neville, prodded Seamus to continue on with the story. Seamus couldn't remember where he'd left off, still a bit glassy eyed at the thought of not-so-little Harry, and Neville wondered if Madame Pomfrey would agree to obliterate him before breakfast. He was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to look Harry in the eye for quite some time, if ever again.
Dean somehow managed to get Seamus back round to the original story. Last night Seamus had made the brilliant deduction that asking Ron would be the best way to get information. Seamus cornered Ron, smiled his infamous and deranged smile, and stared at him. Ron looked at Seamus for a bit, and then at Dean, who also just stared and smiled. Apparently living with the twins, who taught the Gryffindors the art of staring, had scarred Ron, and Ron tried to move. Seamus grabbed his arm a bit too harshly, keeping him on the seat next to him, while Ron grimaced in pain. Seamus gave him an appraising look, raising his eyebrow and asked him why he was acting so off lately. Ron tried to yank his arm back, but Seamus wouldn't let go. Seamus smiled, Ron glared, and Dean watched Harry staring at the parchment as if he was hypnotized. Ron asked for his arm back, Seamus merely smiled some more, and Dean sat there quietly counting the ticks of the clock while continuing to watch Harry. After two minutes of silence, Ron finally gave in. He rolled up the sleeve of his shirt and showed them his left forearm. Seamus and Dean sat there in shock until Dean noticed a movement from across the common room. Hermione was heading over. Seamus leaned in and told Ron to put it away, pointing out that Hermione would likely kill him if she saw it. Ron pushed his sleeve down, jumped up, and ran like his life depended on it. And knowing Hermione, it did.
Neville asked what they'd seen on Ron's left arm, but they refused to tell him, claiming he wouldn't be able to handle it and that he'd never look at Ron the same way again if they told him. And since technically they weren't supposed to tell anyone about Hermione's suspicions and request for help, they figured it wasn't worth their lives. Dean assured Neville it was disturbing, and Seamus gave his opinion that at least half the school would shun Ron if they knew, and his parents would likely disown him. Neville gasped. He was horrified. It couldn't be what he thought it was, could it? Dean and Seamus looked at Neville knowingly, and nodded their heads.
Just then, a furious Ron Weasley came flying off his bed towards them. He told them in no uncertain terms that if they even thought about telling someone else, particularly Hermione or Harry, that he would cut them down before they could accomplish anything worthwhile in their lives, like having sex. Dean bit his lips, trying not to smile, apparently not wanting to alert Ron to the fact that the boy his baby sister was dating wasn't particularly pure. Seamus made no such effort, grinning like a wild banshee. Neville thought everyone had known Seamus wasn't a virgin. Merlin knows that night in third year was unforgettable. He was still scarred. Which was one reason why he, Neville, was still a virgin. Honestly, the thought of dying a virgin, while a bit embarrassing, was far from his biggest worry. But it seemed like it was Ron's biggest worry, with very good reason. Neville was pretty sure that Hermione was going to kill Ron, long before Ron had a chance to lose his virginity, because Neville knew exactly what was on Ron's arm.
Ron stormed off to the bathroom, and Dean, Seamus and Neville all got ready for breakfast. Harry was still ensconced in his bed, curtains drawn, no sound emerging. Neville figured Harry was depressed or something. Sleeping, staring at blank pieces of parchment, walking around idly, mumbling to himself. Neville determined to be a better friend to Harry and keep an eye on him. He'd also encourage Harry to leave some sort of sign if Harry was going to be out in the open in the dormitory wanking. Neville liked Harry a great deal, and would do almost anything for him. But he had no desire to see any more of Harry than he needed to, and he certainly didn't want to see not-so-little Harry in action. No thank you.
Neville and the others went down to breakfast. Neville blushed at seeing both Hannah and Luna make eye contact with him. Neville was still quite shy around both of them, but they were both nice, easy to talk to, and quite pretty. Maybe Neville would ask one or both of them to the next Hogsmeade weekend. Neville blushed again. He sat down at the Gryffindor table, making sure to leave room between himself and Ron. He was trying to not be obvious, but right now he wanted to have as little contact with Ron as possible. Seamus and Dean seemed to be employing a similar strategy, leaving one seat as a barrier between Dean and Ron. Of course Ginny would likely sit there, and Ron wouldn't kill Ginny. Plus she wouldn't be able to reach Dean over Ginny. Neville considered abandoning his pride and sitting with the first years. They were cute and innocent. Luckily, Hermione walked up to the table right then and sat next to Ron, effectively blocking Ron from Neville. Neville sighed in relief. Ron looked miserable, and clamped down on his arms. Neville looked up to find Luna staring at him with a wry smile. He smiled back and started eating.
Neville kept watch for Harry, wondering if he should have woken him up before they left. Finally, with about 10 minutes left for breakfast, Harry came in, face flushed, hair even wilder than usual, and clothes a complete mess. Seamus and Dean shared a look, and Neville glanced at Hermione. Hermione watched Harry with a smirk on her face. Harry, meanwhile, avoided looking at her as if his life depended on it. It looked like Harry was heading for Ginny's spot, which she had vacated briefly to go talk with one of her friends. She came back and sat down between Dean and Ron a few seconds before Harry walked up. He looked confused for a moment, but then headed towards the empty seat between Hermione and Neville. Neville moved his things over, but Harry never made it. Neville watched in confusion as Ron grabbed Harry and pulled him onto his lap. Harry tried to move, but Ron trapped him with his arms. Harry glanced around as if asking for help. Seamus, being Seamus, winked at him. Ginny smirked and winked at her brother. Hermione looked like she was close to solving a puzzle. A puzzle that would no doubt lead to Ron's unfortunate death. Neville looked over at Harry and saw him staring across the hall. Neville's eyes searched and realized that Malfoy was staring unabashedly at Ron. And while Neville's eye sight wasn't exactly the best, it looked like Ron had another potential murderer.
Malfoy looked livid. The other Slytherins seemed to find Harry's current location as rather humorous and many had started laughing. The rest of the hall seemed to be holding their breath, waiting for something to happen. Harry swore and dropped his head to the table. Malfoy glared at Zabini, who was laughing the loudest amongst the Slytherins, grabbed his things and stormed out of the Great Hall. Hermione turned to Ron, no doubt ready to start her interrogation. Before she could get very far though, Harry elbowed Ron in the chest, wrenched himself free, and turned around and glared at his best friend. And then Harry, the boy-who-lived, the chosen one, the savior of the wizarding world, whispered to the traitor that he might as well have gotten up on the head table and announced Harry was gay, since he'd essentially outed Harry just now. At this, Harry ran out of the room. Neville's jaw dropped. Hermione smirked, raised her eyebrow at Ron, and quickly reached for Ron's left arm. She would have succeeded in her quest if it weren't for Quidditch-honed reflexes. He jerked his arm out of her grasp, grabbed his things and walked out of the room as quickly as he could.
Seamus turned to Dean, Dean turned to Ginny, Ginny turned to Hermione, and Hermione continued to look at the door, thinking through the possibilities. Slowly, Hermione turned to Neville and asked for his thoughts. Neville bit his lip, looked nervously into Hermione's knowing eyes, and told her that according to his anonymous sources, Ronald Bilius Weasley had been marked and was now a Death Eater. He didn't add that it seemed his first mission had been to embarrass and publicly discredit Voldemort's number one enemy. Hermione's eyes narrowed. She hummed. And then she too grabbed her bag and left.
Neville instinctively realized what this meant. Despite his thoughts earlier that morning, he didn't really want to die a virgin. So, he stood and walked over to Luna. He leaned down to whisper in her ear, but she turned his face and kissed him. He turned bright red as she released him, and told him in a breathy whisper that she was looking forward to their date next weekend. She gave him another quick kiss and pushed him towards Hannah. Neville stumbled over to Hannah. Hannah frowned for a bit, before her lips quickly turned to a smirk. She too leaned forward and kissed Neville. And then she stood up, turned to Luna and beckoned towards the door. Luna gracefully stood up and nearly danced over to Hannah, looping their arms as they walked out of the hall. The hall was once again silent, and Zabini looked at Neville with his mouth wide open. Seamus snapped the silence first, and with a booming voice he proclaimed that their little Neville was growing up too. Neville took that as his cue to leave and walked as fast as he could out of the hall without being called a coward.
