Chapter Six: Even Valkyries Fall in Love! Shatter Walls of Friendship With Your Hammer, Nora-chan! A Shield-Maiden is Just Another Name, You Know! Fight, Fight!


"Do you even know your great-great-grandfather?"

"Um… he fought in the war?"

"List his victories and his domains or I walk."


"Jaune, it's not you... it's the steady decline on your family's standing over the last few decades."


"Raise your family's political standing, then we'll talk."


"Do you even own land?"


"You don't even control a kingdom! You're not even a prince! You don't even have any claims!"


"Can you even ensure our child will inherit our Attractive trait? Or can you magically make them be born with the Genius trait?"


"If you want this relationship to work, go conquer some minor principalities."

"Yang what."

"... This isn't gonna work out."


"And that's why we broke up," Yang said.

Jaune nodded, "I can almost keep up with Weiss' dating sim stuff, but Yang is just on a different plane of reality."

"See? That metaphor wasn't even a reference to anything," Yang pointed out.

"I think it was."

"Oh really? From where? The genre, publishing date, what are they?" Yang crossed her arms.

Jaune groaned, "See what I've had to put up with?"

And thus, the two blondes explained to their friends why they broke up during a study session.

"You know, I've lived with Yang my entire life, I feel like I should have seen this coming," Ruby rubbed her chin, "Yeah it was really obvious in hindsight. Oh well, who're you dating next?"

"This time I'm serious, no more dating, at least for now," Jaune declared. He turned to Weiss, "You hear that? No more dating for me!"

Weiss rolled her eyes and put away her scroll, "Very well. We've got something else to do anyways."

Jaune paused, "We do?"

Nora jumped out of her seat, "It's time!"

"We're going to prep Nora in the world of romance," Weiss proudly declared.

Their table was silent for a minute, until Pyrrha coughed.

"What were we studying again?" Ruby asked.

Yang said, "Something about… dust thermodynamics," she looked at the papers below her, "And the metaphysical reactions thereof."

"Oh come on guys!" Nora grumbled.

"It's fine, they just don't see it," Weiss patted her shoulder.

"I believe we were on question seventeen," Pyrrha continued, "Given a fire dust crystal of 92% purity," Weiss snorted at the low percentage given, "With a total volume of 120 cubic centimeters and a surface area of 146 square centimeters, estimate the resulting temperature and how long it lasts, assuming a single ignition burst."

"Which formula is this again?" Jaune asked.

"The fourth one," Weiss said as she leaned back in her chair and waited for her friends to catch up.

"You already know the answer don't you?" Ruby poked her partner with her pencil.

"I'd need to check my math to be certain," Weiss said.

"Whoop-de-doo," Ruby blandly remarked.

"Hey guys," Sun walked in on Teams RWBY and JNPR, along with someone they didn't recognize, "What're you doing?"

"Dust mechanics," Blake said as she tapped her paper, "Who's he?"

Sun smiled, "Jaune, Blake, Weiss, everyone else, this is my partner, Neptune."

"S'up," the blue-haired dude grinned, "Couldn't help but overhear your mechanics problem. Is the answer 210 degrees and for forty-one seconds?"

"That's the answer I have," Weiss said.

"Don't be a nerd," Sun elbowed him.

"I prefer the term intellectual," Neptune jabbed back. His eyes spotted Weiss and he walked up to her. With a suave gesture, he said, "I don't think I caught your name, Snow Angel."

Weiss blinked. Then she started laughing uncontrollably, clutching her sides as she fell to the floor.

Neptune visibly deflated as Sun put his hand on his shoulder and whispered, "Don't worry, she's cuckoo."

"Hahaha! Bwahaha!" Weiss crawled back into her seat, "He's like Jaune but with funnier hair!"

"Hey!" Jaune crossed his arms, "I was not that bad."

"You totally were," Ruby said.

"Um why'd she start laughing at me? Usually my charm works," Neptune awkwardly scratched his back.

"Hehe," Weiss grinned and snorted, "You've been coasting on your naturally high charisma stat, allowing you to enter any conversation and do well, despite being a terrible conversationalist. Unfortunately, once you encounter someone with a high enough experience, level, resistance, or their own natural charisma, your one advantage is canceled out."

"I don't… what?" Neptune frowned deeply.

Jaune sighed and translated, "Weiss said you're hot, but she doesn't care."

"That sound about right," Sun said as Neptune smacked him.


Later that day, Team RWBY noticed several more transfer students arriving for the Vytal Festival.

"Ohmygosh Penny!" Ruby jumped and landed on her robot buddy, drawing her into a big hug. Penny hugged back and squeezed Ruby's entire waist, "Ack! Too much!"

"It is nice to see you again, Friend Ruby," Penny smiled as she let go of Ruby, "This is my partner, Ciel."

The young woman in a blue beret impassively stared at Ruby and blinked, "Ruby Rose, age fifteen. I'm Ciel Soleil, age seventeen. Pleasure to meet you," she turned to Penny, "We should be going. We're already off schedule."

Penny stage whispered, "Her semblance has an effect on her personality."

"I can hear you quite well, ma'am. Let's go," Ciel grabbed Penny by the arm and marched them away.

Ruby waved at Penny, who waved back. Weiss coughed, "I see Penny has a very complementary partner."

"Maybe it's a rule that all partners have to be opposites," Ruby mused.

Yang grabbed Blake by the shoulder, "I wonder what're our opposite traits then," the blonde grinned.

Blake sighed, "Oh hey look, there's some other people to talk to," she said blandly as she wound away from Yang's arm.

"It would be prudent to scope out the competition beforehand," Weiss said as Yang snorted.

"Doing that so late? I've already got all the juicy bits on my scroll," Yang pointed at the four women nearby, "Team NDGO from Shade, uses dust and pointy things mostly."

"Please, while the use of employees to gather intelligence is important, I believe that some things you have to do yourself," Weiss said, "The purple-haired one is the leader, if not officially, then the one that the others have the most respect for. She is right handed and fights both close combat and ranged, although she prefers the latter."

"Her name's Nebula, and she uses a crossbow-sword, with middling proficiency in each," Yang recalled.

"And she has a crush on… her redhead teammate."

"No duh Captain Obvious," Yang shook her head, "What do you know about that team over there?" she gestured to another team, this time from Haven.

"The short black-haired girl is sleep-deprived, the gray-haired guy is probably smug about something, the green-haired girl likes the tall black-haired girl, but in a puppy sort of way. The tall girl looks older than a second year should be."

"Intel says she started schooling a couple years late, grew up outside the kingdoms like Blake."

"Is she a princess too?"

"Nope, normal girl through and through," Yang shook her head, "Was there a point to this?"

"Does there have to be?" Weiss smiled, "I shouldn't be the one telling you to lighten up," by this point, Ruby and Blake had wandered away from the two.

"You're a prim and proper princess—"

"Heiress."

"A prim and proper heiress when you want to be, but when you're alone or with your friends, you've got a real deviant side, as Ruby says," Yang sighed, "But I live with Ruby, and I want to keep up the happy and boisterous side of mine when she's around. That way she can grow up without a care in the world."

"Hmph, and people say I had a spoiled upbringing," Weiss smirked, "So this is it then? Your darker, more serious side is shown to me and Jaune alone. It's a difficult way to live."

Yang shrugged, "It's better than nothing. Besides, I can at least talk to you about RQ2."

"Nope," Weiss said, "That game sucks."

"Have you tried Solita Empiritas IV?"

"It's unbearably boring."

"What about Solaria?"

"The civilization designer is the best part of the game."

"Souls of Steel?"

"I expected giant robots. Instead I got Micromanagement: The Game. I was sorely disappointed."

"It takes place during the Great War!"

"Didn't even argue the micromanagement part. Also, I don't see you trying any dating sims."

"Fine, do you have any recommendations?"

Weiss smiled serenely, "Yes. Yes I do."


The next day, as Weiss was walking down the hallway, brainstorming plans for Nora, she was accosted.

"Hey Snow Angel," Neptune said as he clicked his tongue and pointed finger guns at her, as he leaned back on the wall.

"I see your repertoire is as surface level and bland as expected," Weiss said as she walked past him.

"Come on, just because you don't like my style of asking someone out doesn't mean you won't like me," Neptune complained as he followed right behind her, "Can't you give it a try?"

"I see you fail to understand basic marketing," Weiss said, "If you want to sell a product to someone that doesn't need it, you have to give them a reason to want it, or, even better, a reason to believe they need it."

"Well, I want to be truthful and not like, trick you or anything."

Weiss sighed, "I am very busy, so if you can't at least explain why it's not a waste of time, I'm out. I'll give you thirty seconds."

"You'll probably have fun and… uh, you'll have dating experience?"

"Hah! A fool learns from their own mistakes, a wise man learns from the mistakes of others," Weiss walked away.

"So what, you're just going to learn from that thing Sun says you do with Jaune, and then suddenly you'll get it right the very first time you decide to have a real romance?"

She stopped, "Perhaps I will. Whatever the case, it's none of your business."

"I'm a friend of a friend, which is almost a friend, and friends give each other advice when they need it."

"Hmph," Weiss said as she kept walking, "Then I suppose, as a friend of a friend, I'll mentor you with your courting problem."

"You will? Thanks, I guess."

"No problem. You're not my first protege," her back faced Neptune. As she walked down the hall, Weiss' grin spread wider and wider. An idea was forming, and it was glorious.


"So here's the plan," Weiss said to Jaune and Nora, "You've told me you wanted to date Ren, correct?"

Nora vigorously nodded, "We've always been together, but not together-together, and I want to be together-together with him," she pumped her fist to her chest.

Weiss nodded, "Six of us will be attending. I've decided on six since it's a fairly large group, too large to naturally facilitate a romance. That's the trick to lure everyone else into lowering their guard. We will split into three teams of two for our outing. To allay suspicion, Nora will paired with my newest disciple, Neptune."

Jaune raised his hand, "Shouldn't I be paired with him so I can translate between your elegant words and the language of us common folk?"

Nora snickered as Weiss glared at him, "No, you will be with Ren. As such you will be partnered with him, and you will be subtly pushing him towards thinking of Nora in another light, while also preventing yourself from being seen as a rival."

"And that leaves you with Sun," Jaune said.

"He is a wild card, a wingman in his own right. Not even close to a player, but he can definitely influence the event in ways that I can't always anticipate, thus I should keep a close eye on him, just in case. Our primary objective is getting Nora and Ren together, with teaching Neptune as a good secondary goal. Understood?"

Both Nora and Jaune nodded.


"Jaune, you trust me, correct?" Ren said as the two sat alone.

"Of course I do, Ren, you're like the brother I never had," Jaune replied, patting his teammate on the back.

"Good, because I have something very important I want to tell you."

"Go ahead."

"I don't want to date Nora."

"... Wow. That's um, why?"

Ren sighed and leaned back, "She's my best friend, and I love her, but I just don't see her that way."

"Oh. Wow. Yeah, I can see what you mean," Jaune scratched his head, "I'm surprised you figured that out without giving it a try."

"Not everyone has to make out with someone to decide whether they love them romantically Jaune," Ren sighed, "When you live with someone for almost a decade, you get a feeling of the status quo. From there, I can observe others and see their interactions and imagine them for myself. Jaune, your past relationships have taught me more than I could have over the three years. I've decided I don't want a romantic relationship with Nora, I'm content with what we have now."

"But Nora isn't," Jaune reminded.

"Yes, but… I don't have the heart to tell her. Not only that but, I've begun to realize that I've grown to like someone else."

"Someone else… romantically?" Jaune probed.

Ren furrowed his brow, "Yes."

"Oh. Is it someone I know?"

"Weiss. It's Weiss."

"... I'm sorry I could have sworn you said 'Weiss'," Jaune blinked.

"You didn't hear me incorrectly. I said I wish to court Weiss Schnee."

"Okay. You have been hanging around her when she's not being a prim and proper prin-heiress, right?" Jaune winced as he almost said 'princess'. Weiss had slapped him enough times for that, "You do know she's probably insane, right?"

"I find it endearing."

"And extremely reckless?"

"She's courageous, and there's a method to her madness, if one looks deep enough."

"That is literally the entire reason we're friends, I think," Jaune massaged his temples, "She plays too many video games."

"I admire her passion."

"She has no regard for common decency except when it suits her."

"She's a fiercely independent woman."

"She's a picky eater."

"She has a refined palate."

"She prefers waffles to pancakes."

"... I have several waffle recipes I've wanted to try."

"You do realize that she's basically just Nora but more elegant?"

"They say men prefer women similar to their mothers."

"Nora isn't your mother."

"I remember Nora more clearly than my mother, I'm afraid."

"Damnit. You win," Jaune sighed, "But Weiss is planning to ship you and Nora together at the bowling alley and I'm helping."

"And I'm asking you to… not do that. Please, can you help me," Ren gave him a light smile, "My brother from another mother?"

Jaune frowned, "You want me to help you get with Weiss instead of Nora. You want me to trick Weiss Schnee, the self proclaimed Goddess of Dating Sims, who need I remind you, got Yang to date me after she threw me out a window?"

Ren shrugged, "Perhaps she has a strong offense, but we've never tested her defense. After all, if one plays dating simulators all the time, surely they can't have much actual experience?"

"I hate your logic," Jaune mumbled, "Fine. Let's do this. Anything for my bro from another mo."

Ren was silent.

"Brom from another mom?"

Ren sighed.


"So Weiss invited us out bowling," Sun said.

"Really!?" Neptune leapt up.

"Yeah, and I plan to do a little wingmanning, and get you and Weiss together," Sun said.

"That's actually really really cool of you."

"No biggie, what're best bros for?" Sun grinned.


Weiss stared at the cork board and red strings she had put up, grinning wildly as Ruby read a comic book, "I don't like the look on your face."

"Heh heh this will be it, my greatest triumph!" Weiss giggled, ignoring Ruby completely.

"You're too excited for getting Nora a boyfriend," Ruby said, "What gives?"

"Oh naïve, simple, innocent Ruby. While yes, I am doing some matchmaking, I am also planning out the greatest scheme a Schnee has ever put to paper!"

Ruby didn't look up from her comic, "That's great. Are you going to return my cork board any time soon?"

"It's brilliant! Elegant in design, using only one flag, killing several Nevermore with one stone!" Weiss pointed at the first red string connection, "With all of us together, I will put myself on a team with Sun, bringing us two would-be matchmakers out of the equation while preventing Neptune from disturbing me. At the same time, I will steer Nora into dating Neptune instead of Ren by putting them on the same team."

"Uh huh."

"Then I will place Ren and Jaune on the same team, allowing me to manipulate the two's plan to do something or other," she waved her hand, "I'm not sure. Either way, with Neptune and Nora together and Sun and I matchmaking, that only leaves one other potential pairing: Jaune x Ren!" Weiss squeed as she hopped up and down.

"Uh huh," Ruby flipped a page, "You do know Jaune's straight right?"

"Oh he's going to bend. He's going to be a twisty twirl that wraps itself up into a neat, gay little bow."

"I don't think that's how that works."

"It worked for me!" Weiss put her hand on her chest and stared at her figurine cabinet, "I too used to only care for husbandos, but once I saw Yuki-chan, I realized the truth! For moe transcends all gender!"

"I think you're just bi," Ruby said as she kept reading, "Or just super weird. Probably both."

"Perhaps, but I've always had a feeling about the possibilities of those two, they both potentially fit into just the right archetypes," Weiss said, "Ren has several physical characteristics of a trap, and if he actually tried he'd probably be cuter than…" Weiss twisted her lip, "I'd say Pyrrha."

"So Ren's a bit androgynous. So what?"

"There are two paths for a shounen ai relationship. The saying 'everyone has one exception', as a mere gateway. The most common path is a very effeminate man who dresses, looks, and maybe even acts like a woman. When that occurs, the sheer amount of moe is enough for even the straightest of men to bend."

"Okay, you're going to give Ren a makeover."

"Nah I'm going the other route. They're going to bishounen themselves up so much they'll fall for each other's pretty manliness!" Weiss rubbed her hands together, "And I only have to work on Ren, since he's already probably leaning towards being gay for Jaune."

"Wait what?"

"He clearly doesn't want to date Nora, whether out of a feeling of familial bond, or some other reason. However, he has not looked at any other woman since we've arrived at Beacon, and come on, have you seen this school's girls? The average woman is an eight around here."

"Maybe he's chivalrous. Or not looking for a relationship right now. Or any number of reasons actually."

"No shame in trying," Weiss grinned, "And besides, with Jaune and Neptune as senpai-kouhai, they might make a decent backup pairing too," she giggled as she molded her blooming plan. Blooming like the spring flowers in an all boys' school as love flourishes like a flower.

The door opened, and Blake crept into the room, "Did I hear what I think I heard?"

"Yes," Weiss said.

"Do you have ship names yet? Because I already have some in mind," Blake stepped closer and peered at Weiss' documents.

Weiss rolled her eyes, "I've pegged you as a yaoi shipper ever since you stocked your bookshelf with copies of Hoshi to Juujika no Gakkou and Chokoreito to Shounen. You have good taste, I'll admit, but have some decency, woman."

Ruby rolled her eyes, "Pot meet kettle, Weiss. Every time I look at your scroll now I only see naked men and women."

Weiss snorted, "Prude."

"Sorry Ruby, but I have to agree with Weiss," Blake said apologetically.

"So Blake, how would you like to help me ship Jaune and Blake together?" Weiss gave a conspiratorial grin.

Blake shook her head, "Sorry, I'm on Team Neptune for this. The senpai-kouhai relationship needs more notice."

"I guess we'll agree to disagree then," Weiss said, "Do you want to come with?"

"No, I think I'll stay at Beacon. Yang hasn't left the library all day."

Weiss rubbed her hands together, "Soon."

Ruby sighed and went back to reading.


The day arrived, and the six of them: Weiss, Jaune, Nora, Ren, Sun, and Neptune, all rode on the Bullhead to Vale.

It was simple and the atmosphere of the group was easy enough, Nora talked to Ren and Sun, while Neptune and Jaune talked to each other, as Weiss added in her own thoughts.

"Jaune is the senpai archetype for today's event, with Neptune the eager kouhai," Weiss said, "I'll be expecting Jaune to help you out when he can, while you listen to Jaune's word, understand? He's more expert than you are."

"How so?" Neptune asked.

"Pyrrha, Blake, Ruby, Yang," Jaune listed off and sighed.

"Wait you've dated Pyrrha Nikos?!"

"She's my partner, and Weiss thought it was a good idea. Didn't work out, we're still friends," Jaune recounted. It was at least the fifth or sixth time he'd explained this to someone.

"Still," Neptune shook his head, "Okay what are we doing?"

"You are making small talk with Nora. She's a fellow disciple of mine, and we're going to get you two acquainted," Weiss waved at Nora, who walked up to them.

"Nora, your first step today is to make conversation with Neptune here," Weiss said.

"Why? I can talk to Ren just fine," Nora shrugged.

"Perhaps, but what is it the two of you talk about?" Weiss said. Nora stayed silent, "Exactly. You two talk about nothing, as in nothing in particular. That's fine as friends or in years-old romances, but a new relationship needs interest and thought provoking to advance and flourish."

"And passion?" Nora blinked.

"Well you've known each other for so long that your passion has probably lowered to a simmer and needs reinvigoration. We could go the 'Nora is sexier than I recall' route, but looks fade, personality doesn't. We need to get Ren interested in you as a romantic partner," the heiress turned to Neptune, "And that's why we have Neptune here. You two will talk until you have interesting things to say and do. Hobbies and stuff."

Both Nora and Neptune looked at each other awkwardly as Weiss dragged Jaune to Ren, who was talking to Sun about shirts.

"Jaune, you know what to do. Sun, with me."

As Jaune and Ren shrugged at each other, Sun and Weiss approached a lonely corner of the Bullhead. Sun spoke up, "I know that you know that I'm trying to set you up with Neptune."

"Of course. It's common courtesy to detail plans, as is the rule of wingmen," Weiss smiled, "I'll let you know that I intend to ship Neptune and Nora together, kill two Nevermore with one stone."

Sun shrugged, "I won't stop you. Neptune ending up with anyone is good, and Nora's cool."

"But you won't help me?"

"Well, I'm helping my bro get with you, so no, sorry," Sun smiled, "Will a glowing recommendation from me change your mind?"

"No. But it is considered."

He shrugged, "Can't say I didn't try."


After landing, they arrived at a nearby bowling alley in the shopping district. It was large, with a dozen lanes available. It wasn't a particularly busy day for the venue, and they were able to get their shoes, balls, and reserved lane.

Unbeknownst to the rest of the group, Weiss also rented out the two lanes next to theirs out, leaving them empty and all six of them together in one.

"Let me guess, your average score is 300," Jaune sauntered up as he carried his blue bowling ball.

"Two-hundred-ten, actually," Weiss said, "There's a private bowling alley back home. You ever play?"

Jaune shook his head, "There wasn't a bowling alley in my hometown, but I did play a bowling computer game with my sisters."

"A game isn't always a good substitute for real life. The physics for real bowling are much more nuanced and disparate than a computer recreation," Weiss said, "The invisible oil patterns in a lane makes each experience different, for one."

"So you had a dozen lanes in your manor?"

"Six," Weiss corrected.

"Is there anything you haven't done yet?" Sun asked as he polished the ball he received.

"Oh! I bet Weiss has never panhandled for money before!" Nora grinned as she held up her bright pink ball.

"That I have not. It might come in handy one day, who knows."

"Ooh then I'll have to teach you later. You've gotta throw out the big puppy-dog eyes to get the most Lien."

"Nora, I feel worried," Jaune said.

"Nah it's cool, it was a rough patch for me and Renny when we were kids. It's nice to be able to laugh about this kind of stuff now," Nora grinned, "Now bowl already."

Jaune took his ball and threw it. It bounced, skidded, and rolled into the gutter. His second go got him two pins. He scratched his head as Ren took his turn, scoring a spare.

Then Weiss got a strike, and the game was on.


Ruby looked at the graphic novels Weiss had mentioned earlier, all on Blake's bookshelf. Ruby's hand reached out.

No! They were filth! Ruby smacked her face. Weiss had a filthy mind underneath that ladylike exterior, so surely most of the stuff she read was filth.

And yet… Weiss was adamant Ruby would like them. Even after very clearly establishing her, to use a phrase Weiss used, prudishness.

Maybe it was light stuff. After all, she didn't start fighting the top boxers in the underground circuit when she began. She built up to it.

Maybe Weiss thought of that and chose for her. Maybe…

No! No way! They were gateway series, seemingly innocent, but will eventually lead her down a dark path as she got into more questionable works. Besides she didn't have time for this. She had school and fighting to do.

Maybe just a peek. It couldn't hurt.

Ruby smacked her errant hand with her other hand and ran out of the room.


"I don't get the point of teams if you're just going to carry me," Sun said. When Weiss gave him a look he added, "I mean I know your ulterior motive, but from a game standpoint…"

"It will all make sense in due time."

"You didn't know how bowling teams work did you."

"I did say I had a private bowling alley. Come on, let's take a peek at Nora and Neptune's conversation."

They discreetly backed towards the pair and leaned in close.

"And that's why I like Ren! Well, the top six reasons," Nora shrugged, "Why do you like Weiss?"

"She's cute and she has this vibe, you know?" Neptune scratched his head, "Like cold and hot at the same time. Hot in more ways than one. Plus, it's not often I chase a girl. There's something about being hard to get…"

Weiss muttered under her breath, "Great, I've been falling into the tsundere archetype. Just brilliant."

"Yeah I can see that," Nora said, "Is there anything else you want to talk about?"

"Uh… watch any good movies lately?"

"The new Bombshell movie?"

"Didn't see it. How about the one with Spruce Willis?"

"Nope."

And with that, there was an awkward silence. Weiss popped up from behind a plastic seat and smiled, "Well I can see we're off to a bumpy start. Neptune, go talk with Jaune for some conversation pointers. I want to work with Nora specifically."

Neptune awkwardly waved at Nora and walked off.

"As we speak, Jaune is implying to Ren that he should be looking at you like a woman. But of course, before we go further, I feel we should be honest with each other," Weiss sat down and patted on the plastic seat next to her, "It's some girl talk too."

Sun nodded, "Right, I'll go get some nachos or something," he whistled as he walked to the food stand.

"What do you want to talk about?" Nora asked. She glanced at Jaune and Ren before back at Weiss.

"Are you absolutely sure you love Ren romantically?"


Ren and Jaune looked at Neptune, who simply raised an eyebrow, "So, what tips do you got?"

Jaune rubbed his chin. On the one hand, Neptune was the friend of a friend. On the other, Ren was his friend, his bro from another mo. The choice was obvious, "I actually have tips for courting Weiss specifically," he smiled, "After all, I've spent a lot of time with her, and I've asked her out before, so you can learn from my mistakes."

"Go ahead dude," Neptune said as Ren polished his bowling ball.

"First thing you got to know is that Weiss is a singer. She really appreciates music, so a serenade is must. I never got around to using my guitar before she roped me into the whole dating sim thing," Jaune started, "You heard about that concert she coordinated a while back?" Neptune nodded, "I was there, and she loves special effects: fireworks, laser lights, the whole shebang."

If Jaune could lie his way into the world's most prestigious huntsman academy, he can lie to one blue-haired guy, "Oh! And mirrors. She loves mirrors. She even wrote an entire song about them."

"You mean M-m-m-mirror? I thought that was about far away love," Neptune frowned.

"Nope. Trust me, I've dated all her teammates and I've seen her dorm. Mirrors everywhere. You have to compliment her eyes specifically, because that's what she stares at in them."

"She doesn't seem like a narcissist."

"Oh no, it's not narcissism. Weiss is just weird. She has this fascination with how her eyes look. Stare deeply into them, and you've got her. When I made deep eye contact, she took a whole extra minute to respond."

"That sounds oddly specific."

"And another thing, Weiss is obsessed with dating sims," Jaune rolled his eyes, "So you have to make yourself a suitable," he snapped his fingers trying to remember the word.

"Husbando," Ren supplied as he threw his ball.

"Husbando! You have to be that. It's a—"

"I know what that is," Neptune said, "I'm from Mistral, and as Sun would tell you, I'm kind of a nerd."

"Don't be that," Jaune said, "Weiss is looking for a specific husbando. She wants to rebel against her father," he made a grasping gesture with his hands, "She wants a bad boy. That's why I never got her, I'm a total weenie."

"Bad boy," Neptune nodded. Ren had left to do something else.

"A stereotypical bad boy, from a dating sim, you know, with the long hair in the front, leather jackets, all black, and maybe a mask to generate mystery," Jaune stroked his chin, "Your goggles would probably do."

"Really?!" Neptune felt his eyewear on top of his head, "Thanks man. You're a great help," he gave Jaune a winning smile, "Any general tips?"

Jaune puckered his lips slightly, "Confidence. Girls love confidence. Overwhelming confidence makes up for anything you're lacking. If you look like you belong, if you look like you're doing it right, people will believe you."

"Really?"

Jaune smiled, "Did I ever tell you about the time Weiss pretended to be her own body double at a White Fang rally?"


"Of course I do!" Nora frowned.

"Are you absolutely sure? Is that truly the feeling you have in your heart of hearts?" Weiss pointed a finger in the general direction of Nora's heart. Which appropriately enough had a heart-shaped cleavage window right above it.

"I have one heart and it beats for Ren," Nora said resolutely.

Weiss stepped to Nora's side, "Let's try and work this through, shall we? I've been putting thought into this. Quite a bit of it, ever since Jaune started dating Yang. And I don't know if you love him in that specific way."

"Oh yeah? What do I have to do to prove it?" Nora pouted and placed her hands on her hips.

"Close your eyes," Nora did so, "Imagine you and Ren, walking on a beach."

"I don't think we've ever gone to the beach together before. Maybe we should," Nora said, "Do you think he'd like that?"

"Maybe," Weiss shrugged. The beach would certainly be an event, but beach episodes were for shows, not dating sims. It either happens entirely in a coastal area, or not at all. A hot spring was still on the table though.

"You can see the sun setting, turning the once blue sky into a tapestry of reds and oranges. The sound of gentle crashing waves become the background, as you feel the smooth sand along your feet. Ren is there, chest bare in swim trunks as he runs up to you. He moves closer to you and holds your hand. He pulls you in to his chest."

Nora began quietly squeeing, "He's so cute and hot and kind."

"He smiles and his face draws closer to yours. His soft, supple lips slowly touches yours," Weiss whispered into Nora's ear. The heiress looked at her, and saw red cheeks.

"Um— I uh, wow. Ren. I don't."

"Shhh, let's just stay here, together."

"Yeah. I'd like that," Nora whispered, eyes still closed.

"Do you want to kiss again?"

"No, I just, I just want to be with you."

"And nothing else?"

"Can't we— can't we just talk and play games together?"

"Of course we can. But if we're in a relationship, we should do more, right?"

"No. No, I don't want things to change. I want things to be just like how they always were, when we were kids."

"Nora, you're my best friend, and the one I want to be with every day. But… I want more than that. I want a family again."

"I can be your family," Nora said.

"You already are. And because of that, I can't love you that way."

"Yeah…" Nora whispered, "I think… I think I feel the same way. We're best friends and that's what I want more than anything! To be together forever!"

"And we will. But we have to grow up."

"Yeah, we do."

"Open your eyes," Weiss said.

Nora blinked open to see Ren in front of her. He gave her a soft smile as she blinked back tears, "Did you mean everything you said?"

"Yeah," Ren replied, "I love you like a sister."

She giggled, "I love you like a brother. The best brother," the two of them drew each other into a hug.

Weiss clapped her hands, "Well, now that we got that out of the way, I must remind you that today's event is about getting Nora a date, and I have some great backups for you."

Nora and Ren laughed into each other through tears.


"You know, this has actually been pretty tame for an event you've made me go to," Jaune said, "It's not a White Fang rally, underground fight club, or an impromptu concert with a world famous boy band. It's just bowling. I like this change of pace," he said as Nora bowled her very first spare. She and Ren cheered. Jaune cheered too, as Weiss daintily ate her nachos.

One bite at a time.

Slowly.

She didn't like the meat and jalapeños. Why couldn't they sell it with only cheese? Weiss liked cheese. Not… whatever meat substitute was dribbling down into the plastic bowl.

Weiss glanced to see Jaune high-fiving Nora, who then also high-fived Ren, Sun, and Neptune. It really was a sight to see, a novice getting worked up over a spare, when a pro got spares all the time. Hell, spares were considered bad by Weiss when she was aiming for a high score.

She looked down into her plate of nachos and blinked. If she kept going, she'd probably become introspective into her own upbringing, contrasted with the childhoods of her friends. It would potentially be an eye opening experience.

But she was busy. She needed to figure out the route that would result in the best outcome for her friends. She knew her goal, but not the way to the goal.

With her thoughts on Ren sorted out, it was now possible to put an honest effort into getting Nora a date. She and Weiss agreed that trying to see other people in a romantic light would help lighten the burden and dependency on Ren. The two were inseparable, but Nora needed to find independence from him, so that they may one day have a more balanced relationship, however that may be.

It could be possible to simply not have Nora date anyone, but she and Ren lived together, so that would just lead back into their old trappings. No, Nora needed to spend time away from Ren. Perhaps the time away will foster a new romantic love, as absence made the heart grow fonder. Or it could bolster Nora's revelation just minutes ago.

Weiss banked on the latter, although there was always a chance…

If she was right, then Nora needed to look for someone else. Neptune was an adequate person to have a first relationship, with Sun vouching for him.

Jaune doesn't want to go through this whole cycle again, and Weiss understood that. That's why she's setting him with Ren, it should be sufficiently different enough that it wouldn't feel like a rut.

Ren had never shown attraction to the opposite sex before, Weiss had noted. He frequently stared blankly in a direction with no women in sight, even despite the total hotties everywhere. Weiss would have to test the waters and see for sure if her hypothesis was correct.

Weiss picked up another chip and bit into it. She smiled when Sun sat down next to her, only for Neptune to sit on the opposite side. She rolled her eyes.

Sun wanted to help Neptune, and he wanted to learn how to date from her, and thus a first relationship would be fulfilling that. She would have to get rid of Neptune and throw him towards Nora.

"Neptune, do you want to date a girl?"

"Yeah, I want to date you, Snow Angel," Neptune smiled as he leaned back in his seat, a lollipop in his mouth, his eyes never breaking eye contact with her. He made a strange purring sound as he finished his sentence.

"Why are you purring?"

"It's a growl, and makes me seem more… dangerous," he pulled the lollipop out and gave another smirk, never blinking, "You have beautiful eyes, Weiss. Like little pools of the ocean."

Weiss blinked, frowned, sighed, then turned to Sun, "Did you put him up to this?"

Sun shook his head, "Not me. He was talking to Ren and Jaune earlier."

"Jaune is a good student, he may be dense, but he's learned enough to know that whatever that—" she pointed at Neptune, who was combing his hair into a stereotypical Mistrali delinquent style, while still staring at her, "Is beyond idiotic."

"I always saw him as your straight man," Sun added in.

"Exactly, he can't have done this. Therefore it must have been Ren," Weiss frowned, "But for what reason? He always was an enigma, having no allegiances except to Nora…" her eyes widened, "I see!"

"What?" Neptune asked, "I mean, s'up?"

Weiss ignored him, "Ren wants Neptune to fail, thus allowing him and Nora to be the only path left!" she snapped her fingers, "He's good."

"Wait what?" Neptune's hands were then grabbed by Weiss.

"Come on," Weiss grinned, "Let's get you a date."

"Woah!" Neptune was dragged off, leaving the blonde faunus to sigh. Sun's tail flicked back and forth as he waited for his turn to bowl.


"You sit here, and Nora sits here," Weiss brought the two of them to an empty table away from the bowling lanes, "I think it's finally time to be upfront. Neptune, I want you to date Nora. Nora, I want you to date Neptune."

"What?!" Nora yelped, "But I just had a whole introspective moment and self realization! It's too early for me to get back in the dating scene!"

"Can't go back if you were never there," Weiss quipped, "So? Give it a shot. That pinball game over there is new by the way. Here are some quarters."

Weiss then left them alone with a large sack of coins.

Neptune peered into the bag, "There must be a hundred Lien worth of coins in here."

Nora nodded, "I've never panhandled anywhere close to this."


"Jaune! Ren! I need you two!" Weiss dragged both of them to another empty table and plopped down some coins, "Go into the arcade and play some games together. You'll know what to do next."

She then left them.


Sun frowned at Weiss as she plopped herself down into her seat and relaxed in an unladylike fashion, "So you want Jaune and Ren together? That's not going to work out at all."

"Why do you think that?" Weiss asked. The arcade games were a short detour, as their bowling game was only two rounds from being finished.

"Jaune isn't into guys, and I'm pretty sure Ren has his eyes set on someone else."

Weiss snorted, "No he doesn't. I haven't seen Renlook at any woman since we started Beacon. And that is a feat."

"Yeah, I see what you mean," Sun nodded, "But I figured out why he doesn't."

"Do tell."

"It's not my place to, and it also goes against my current goal."

"Your goal is to set Neptune up with me. Why would Ren factor in at all?" she frowned.

"You really don't see it, huh? And Yang said Jaune was dense," he shook his head.

"That reminds me," Weiss pulled out her scroll and dialed, "How are you doing?"

"Gah! Why is it impossible to date Kuro-chan! I've maxed out every stat, clicked all the right choices, and even played all the damn mini games!" Yang groaned from the scroll.

"Did you fail the fifth battle? You're supposed to do that."

"... You're shitting me. I hate this game."

Weiss shrugged, "You wanted to play a dating sim with a strategy element."

"I'll call you later," Yang hung up.

Weiss dialed Ruby, "How are you?"

"Fine! I'm fine! Just peachy!" her partner's voice faltered over the scroll. Ruby then hung up.

"I'm going to have to look into that later," Weiss mumbled. She turned back to Sun, "Anyways, you were saying that Ren likes someone else?"

"Yeah," Sun sighed, "You'll figure it out, maybe."


Eventually, the games ended, and so did their bout of bowling. Weiss finished with a score over 200, while everyone else lingered below 100.

As their Bullhead made its way back to Beacon, Jaune asked, "What exactly was the point of going out to bowl anyways? We could have done all the stuff we did anywhere. The actual bowling was—"

"Superfluous!" Nora grinned and ran up to them, "Ren's word-a-day calendar," she added.

"Right, that."

Weiss frowned, "A change of pace leads to new lines of thinking, as was my intention. One out of three of my goals were met, which was disappointing, but not terrible," she shrugged.

"Yeah," Nora scratched her head, "Neppy and I just aren't that compatible. What was your third goal?"

"'Neppy'?" Jaune mouthed. Weiss shrugged.

"It's a secret, but," Weiss wrapped her arm around Nora and pulled her in. She whispered, "It was for Ren."

"Ooooh," Nora whispered back, "You and him?"

Weiss just stared back, "What?"

"If I was taken by Neptune, that only leaves you among our group."

The heiress' eyes darted around, "What about Jaune?"

"Renny's not interested in guys, silly!" Nora giggled.

"Of course he is."

"I've known him since we were kids. I was there when he hit puberty. Trust me when I say he's only interested in girls. He stares all the time when he thinks no one's looking."

"That can't be right. I haven't seen him look at anyone at Beacon," Weiss whispered, "He just stares at the wall behind me."

Nora stared blankly at Weiss. She slowly unhooked the heiress' arm from her shoulder. She kept eye contact the entire time as her face contorted. The exasperated expression on her face was something she had never made before.

"What?"

Nora blinked and sighed, "Jauney, I think Weiss is broken," she shook her head, "Of course it had to be you."

Weiss frowned, "I have no idea what is going on."

Jaune leaned towards Nora, who whispered into his ear. He replied, "I'm with Weiss. I am just as confused as she is. It makes no sense."

Nora swatted him, "Hey! That's my bro from another mo you're talking about!"

"I don't follow," Weiss sighed as she sat down.

Her two friends sat down in front of her, with Nora grabbing Weiss' hands, "Weiss, I'm going to be very slow, okay? Ren. Likes. you."

Weiss pursed her lips, "We're friends. He's my main wingman."

Her two friends facepalmed.

Jaune spoke slowly, "Yes but, haven't you ever wondered why he's always willing to be your wingman?" Jaune pointed out, "And he does look at you sometimes."

The heiress opened her mouth, then closed it. A minute passed before she spoke again, "Why? Why does he like me?"

Jaune shrugged, "He finds your veritable insanity charming. He's a keeper."

Nora mused, "I guess I can see it. She does remind me of someone, but I can't place my finger on it. Someone I've met?" she shrugged. Jaune coughed.

"So, what are you going to do, Weiss?" Jaune asked.

Weiss stood stock still, stiff as a board, "I… I don't know."

"Do you want to ask him out?"

"I don't know! I've never done this before!"

"What," Jaune frowned, "Of course you have. You told me yourself you've conquered dozens of men and women."

"In games! All of it in games!" she squeaked out.

"Are you telling me," Jaune held his voice steadily, "That you had the same amount of dating experience as I had when we started this?"

She nodded.

"..." Jaune paused for a moment. Weiss and Nora held their breaths. Then he replied, "On the one hand, I'm disappointed and felt like I should have seen this coming when you said you'd conquered hundreds of men and women. On the other hand, I'm impressed on how far we've gotten and I'm… thankful?"

He frowned, "Yeah, thankful, for the relationships I've had, even if they didn't last. You were a great mentor, but now I'm afraid, the student has surpassed the teacher," he gave her a shit-eating grin.

Weiss gaped before realizing what was going on. A smirk blossomed over her face, "Well, my dear and worldly teacher, what shall be my first lesson?"

"Lesson one," Jaune started, "Asking someone out on a date. First thing you need is confidence. The second thing you need is your target to have a high enough attraction, without any baggage. That seems to be the case right now, so let's get you two together," he stood up.

"Now?" Weiss blanched.

"No time like the present. He's been trying to date you since yesterday, let's trip him up a bit by asking him out first," Jaune held out a hand. Weiss looked at it. She took a deep breath and grabbed it.

The three of them walked over to where Ren was sitting, eyes closed in a meditative state. Nora whispered in Jaune's ear, who whispered back. Jaune then told Weiss, "Be upfront. Be you. That's who he likes. But above all, be confident."

"Hey, what are you guys doing?" Neptune walked up to them.

"Shhh!" Nora and Jaune grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him back, "Sorry Neppy, but it's over."

Neptune looked over to see Weiss waking Ren up by poking him on the forehead. The realization struck him, "I see."

"Don't worry," Jaune said, "There are plenty of fish in the sea. Besides, you probably wouldn't last her zaniness for long. It's an acquired taste."

Neptune nodded. He frowned and asked Nora, "You're okay with Ren being with someone else?"

"Yeah," she smiled, "I'm happy that he's happy. Besides," she grabbed both him and Jaune by the necks, "This means I don't need to be faithful and can experiment!"

Jaune sighed, "Nora, no."

She pouted, "Fine. I'll find someone else to explore my growing sexuality."

Neptune asked, "Why am I being dragged? You don't find me attractive."

"It would've been weird to grab one boy's neck, you know?"

"Quiet you two," Jaune hushed them.


"Weiss what are you doing?" Ren asked as he meditated. Or at least he tried to, since Weiss was poking him in the forehead.

"Waking you up."

"A person meditating is still awake."

"Oh," Weiss said.

"Is there something you wanted to ask?" Ren asked.

"Um yes. But I can come back when you're not busy," she tittered.

"It's fine. Meditation is best when one isn't," Ren said.

"Okay so," she scratched her arm and rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet, "Jaune and Nora have told me a lot of stuff regarding our relationship standing and they told me to go in and change our current status," she took a deep breath, "Jaune's now my new mentor, with him being more practiced in certain areas of life than me. Nora was able to piece together the disparate facts and posit to me the conclusion and um…"

Weiss paused. Ren looked directly at her and gave a soft smile.

She steeled herself and took another breath. Her lips parted and her vocal chords began to vibrate, "Do you want to go out with me sometime?"

Ren smiled, "Yes. I would love that."

Behind them, Nora cheered and Jaune smiled. Ren and Weiss looked at their friends and chuckled.


The six of them came back to Beacon to see Ruby and Yang wrestling each other in the student lounge.

"Who? Who corrupted my sweet, innocent little sister with this garbage?!" Yang screamed as she pulled Ruby into a headlock, "Blake must have done it, it has to be!"

"Where did you get that filth on the computer? Was it Weiss? It was her wasn't it! She's violated my kind and mature older sister!" Ruby squirmed her way out and kicked her sister in the shins.

"No you're the one that's been corrupted!"

"No you!"

"Give me back my keyboard, I need to conquer Kuro-chan!"

"After you give me back my book! I want to know if Brie and Salmon get together!"

"Never!"

Jaune and Weiss grabbed Yang while Ren and Nora pulled Ruby apart from each other.

ROUTE COMPLETE

White Lotus End Achieved

Continue? [Yes/No]

Are you sure?


Chapter Six: WHAT?! Even the Mentor Character Has a Route?! The Protagonist is a Wingman?! White Hair and Black! Can Unexpected Love Stack?! A Quiet Love Makes a Big Move! Fight On, Ren-san!


A/N:

inb4 someone complains how Yang was totally unreasonable about her relationship goals. How dare you think someone who only wants marriage to attain prestige, power, and noble titles is unreasonable? (sarcasm).

I've closed the poll two weeks after, and the results are in: 6 votes for Winter, 5 for Coco, 4 for Cinder and Neo each, and zero for Ciel. I'm sad no one wants a time traveler ship, but I can understand why. I was surprised how many wanted Coco, which is why I'm announcing the following:

Plans of a certain route were scrapped in favor of something more interesting, thus Coco is no longer a DLC character, but rather part of the main story! Specifically, the next chapter! It will, sadly, be my last chapter out for a while, since I will be starting grad school very soon, and I will have little time to read, let alone write.

After the Coco chapter will be three more "main story" chapters (only one of which is the interlude), which I will work on and off in my spare time over months. Sorry it had to be like this, but c'est la vie.