A/N Sorry this chapter is so short. I just couldn't be bothered writing any more on it, and it's hard to write from a guy's point of view. I also didn't want to make my readers wait too long for the next chapter, so here it is - albeit a small one.
"Are you honestly still thinking about leaving?" Mistress Zetta's voice jolts me from my daydream and I sit up quickly.
"No, ma'am," I say nervously, "I was just thinking about my brother and my sister."
Zetta shakes her head knowingly. "No you weren't," she tells me, "I don't feel pain radiating from you, the way it does when you're actually thinking about your dead family... Ah!" she nods, "There's the wave of agony. I see you are thinking about them now."
I nod back to her, blinking hard to keep from crying. Sith don't cry, not now, not ever.
"Hold onto that pain, Karrus," Zetta smiles, "it will help you in your training. And remember, you can't run away. Remember what happened to—"
"Feral. Yeah, whatever." I wave away the comment; I've heard it about a million times. Feral was a girl who used to live at the Sith academy, and there was no doubt that that was the truth. I talked to Feral's best friend yesterday, and she told me she still misses her. Anyone would, I suppose, from the way Carela describes her - she used to get annoyed at the fact that no-one could pronounce her name right, which was apparently rather cute.
"She'd be like, 'It isn't FEH-ruhl, it's feh-RAHL!'," Carela told me yesterday, sort-of misty-eyed, "and it would always make me giggle."
I had nodded slowly, not really paying attention, thinking more about my own family than a girl I'd never met before. Carela had noticed my pain, and even though it wasn't very Sith-like to show compassion, she hugged me tight. I always feel like Carela understands me, since she lost a best friend at 11 years old. I lost my sister when I was 9, and my brother when I was 12. And I guess I lost my parents too, since they withdrew so totally because they were grieving.
"Karrus!" Zetta snaps, and I jerk my head back so fast I almost get whiplash. "Get those thoughts out of your head! You are a Sith, not a Jedi. You cannot radiate love, you must radiate hate!"
I sigh. Whatever. Pushing myself up off the bench, I trudge out of the room. Enough meditation for the day.
"Get back here, Karrus!" Zetta growls at me. I flick my hand and telekinetically slam the door in her face. "Karrus!" she shrieks, "Being hateful does not mean being rude to your tutors!"
I ignore her. Mistress Zetta is annoying, and I just want to get to Physical Combat, where I can see Carela again.
A/N Maybe I'll add more to this chapter and update, but I don't know. Enjoy!
