He sat down quietly on a lone bench. The air in the room around him was shrewd with darkness. Only a single ray of starlight omitting, bouncing off his helmet. "Forgive me…" He knew shouldn't feel this. He shouldn't but he did. "I feel it again… The pull to the light,"He prayed to ghosts that no longer exist. Giving into those foul emotions were a sign of weakness. His leader taught him that. No his own life taught him that. Ren bowed his head in respect to this empty room. No matter how hard he tried to cast away this heavy feeling in his chest, it just come back stronger. Beating down his chest, demanding to reside in there.
'Hope', was a word forbidden in this new world order. Certainly not a word for one of the knights of Ren. Definitely, not for their leader. Anxiety was a wave that tugged him into its undercurrent. Unsure if he could complete any of his upcoming tasks. But knowing that he must do so to make the next step forward. "Supreme leader … He senses it."
His attention focusing on a being in the corner of the room. He needed guidance, a beckon to the right path. Just something to keep him on his current task. "Show me the way…And I'll finish what you started," pleading with the air around him. The sound of electric metal door pushed open,"Sir—Supreme leader Snoke wants a word with you."
Kylo choose not to express any form of communication as he rose from his sitting position to follow the trooper. While his heavy boots exited the corridor, he left a crusted burnt mask similar to his own in it's wake.
—
The rush of LA Traffic blazed passing the throngs of faceless people. Echoes of joyous screams and shrieks of children playing in parks filled the air. A nice cool breeze brushed a honey blonde's hair. Sitting on a bench reading a quiet book to pass the time. Eyes lifting off the pages every few moments to check on the children scurrying about. She smiled softly to herself watching them play. One little boy was playing tag with another group of children. Chasing after a girl attempting to call her it. The honey blonde looked back down for a second when — thud— a whimper cried out. The woman darted up with a start. Without second thought rushed to the six year old boy. "Ricky, sweetie are you alright?" The woman bent to check on her son's scripted knee. A sigh of relief escaped her lips, glad to see that the mark was only skin deep.
She inspected her sweet little boy's face surpassing a smile. She forced her smile into a frown as her little child's eye began to swell. She attempted to calm her love down, "It's going to be alright darling. It's just a scratch." Rick's nose sniffed, "It hurts." She finally smiled to her child, "It may hurt now but I promise you will get better." Her words did not null the boy's pain. More tears rolled down his cheeks. His mother gave a soft warm sigh, "Want me to kiss it better?" Rick woefully nodded. His mother gently smiled, leaned to the scraped knee and welcomed it with a peck of her lips. Rick chuckled feeling his mother's hot air come out of her nose. When her lips parted from the injury it left lipstick mark as evidence, "Better?" The boy gave his mother a wide toothy smile as he nodded yes. "Good," his mother said placing a bandaid on rick's knee. "Now go play."
—
Today was a series of first order shots with the 'FO gang' as the crew members loved to call it. Comprised with actors that took on the role as Hux, Phasma, Snoke( a man specialized suit for cgi) and of course Kylo. For what it was worth they seemed alright. But Ren didn't really have any interest interacting with the other cast members. His only train of focus was sticking to his goal and leave for the day. Hide away before the LA air around him might begin to make him suffocate.
Absentmindedly stoking his left wrist to calm his nerve. Ren stared into nothingness void. One week alone. He knew he could do it. He's not a child that needs to be supervised. Closing his eyes he sunk back into a heavy feeling weighing him down in his chest. Caught in time. He was begging for a selfish sign. Relying on the power Rick still had over him. Hoping he would guide him back to his rightful place. A form of a woman appeared in the back of his mind. Crunching his brows as he realized the watch wasn't there. Snapping back into reality, Kuon realized his was still in costume. "You are needed on set." Shifting his attention to the assistant, Ren bobbed his head and followed the crew to film to the beginning of the movie.
—
Shrouded in steal cold darkness sat a large ominous figure. Waiting to hear the status of their current mission. Angered by the information received, a fist curled gripping at the edge of the arm rest. The figure growled at his two subjects, "Soon the resistance will have the map and retrieve the last jedi. All because of one defected trooper and a captive resistance pilot somehow escaped." At the receiving end of the scowl stood a meak ginger general, Hux stoically accepting this tongue lashing. Kylo stood right beside the weasel. Hux in a panic tried to gain back their leader's good graces. As Hux hesitatingly piped up, the towering figure slowly revealed himself to be disfigured man baring his teeth at the two. "Supreme leader Snoke I take full responsibility—," Hux was cut off by their leader. "General!" Their leader stood off his throne, "Our strategy must now change." Kylo listened intently as the two spoke of a weapon. One that could destroy solar systems. "The new weapon can wipe the republic out in one go sir," General Hux proclaimed. "Then go," Their leader barked orders at his lower rank dismissing him.
Kylo was about to make his exit as well when, "Not you Ren." He halted. Kylo turned to face his supreme leader. Slowly he gazed through the mask, eyeing his superior. Visually examining his scarred up face. Half a cheek was gone. In its place a scarred hole presumably an entrance or exit wound of a war. Accompanied with similar ones trailing down his throat. His icy pale blue eyes that were lopsided eyeing Ren back. Their leader shifted his head to Ren's direction. Getting a better view of his horribly healed scar on the top of his bald head. It was almost like his skull was once spit open.
"There has been an awakening," Their leader tried to heed warning to his apprentice. "You feel it don't you." Kylo answered, "…Yes." "There is one more thing. The droid we seek has took refuge on the Millennium Falcon." Snoke sounded forewarned, "Even you, Master of the knights of Ren, have never faced such a test." Kylo lifted gaze to look at Snoke in the eye. Well as much as he could, "By the grace of your training I will not be seduced." He was not confident his own words. Snoke could tell, "We shall see… We shall see." With a final message Snoke designated into thin air, ending their conference call.
—
The director called cut and monitored the small screen. After inspecting the footage they called for a wrap for the day. "We will reconvene the same time tomorrow. Keep up the good work we are close to the home stretch." They shouted out words of encouragement.
Kuon huffed off that blasted mask pushing the hair away from his eyes. The feeling of anxiousness was resting in the pit of his stomach since he spoke with President throat bobbing thinking of this mental chest game that his boss could be playing. Heading to his dressing room and locking the door behind him. He stripped off the layers of Kylo Ren to be just... Ren.
He took a hard look at the ebony plastic mask. Tracing the curves of it with his fingertips. Just how much of him was actually different than Kylo. Besides the obvious being that he's 'magical'(or as Kyoko would call it). He took a moment to think. Both of them cursed with darkness since they were conceived. Pressure of family legacy sinking them down. Outside forces festering on him since god knows when. Lastly both went off to make a new name for themselves. Desperate to kill off their weaker beings. No matter how much love their parents put in, it was almost like it was destiny that they would end up this way. Dark and Twisted. Caught between sanity or insanity.
Emotionally equipped as a teenaged boy. Pretending to have it all figured out. Kuon poured a lot of his past emotions into creating his character.
Kylo was more conflicted than Cain or BJ. BJ was the soulless empty shell 'Kuon' is now. Cain was the man trying to fight the darkness. But Kylo is the one if none of it happened. Mentally ill, stunted at the age of a 17 year old. Teetering back and forth of a scale of what is right thing to do. Just before he jumps off the edge of insanity. Believing that he is right. Vindictive to the world around him. If he never met Rick, Ren could say with confidence that he would have ended up just like Kylo.
—
Waking to the annoying sound of the alarm blaring off. Kuon outreached his arms to an empty bed. Combing his fingers through his hair. Pushing the covers off and headed for the shower. Washing the sleep away with the hot water. Once satisfied with his cleanliness he toweled himself off and reached for his robe. Went to the kitchen to fetch piece of toast when a little redhead popped up on his shoulder. "That's not a meal!" She cutely growled. Slightly smiling to himself as he mentally said sorry to her. Opening the fridge for milk and cereal. This is better right? "Barely," the chibi mumbled disappearing off his shoulder. Still smiling to himself, Ren propped up the camera and started to eat. When the final bite was finished Kuon whooshed it away with a message and went on with his morning routine.
First up, was early morning practice for the final fight. Paired with trained professionals to help him remember the right steps. Ren was calmer than the last time. He would go through the steps and repeat till forced to go on set. Then head to costume department, shooting the needed scenes… and Rinse and repeat for the next few days.
When the sixth day broke, fatigue coursed through Kuon's veins. His whole body's muscles were screaming for a simple break. His tired eyes landing on the empty side of the bed once more. His imagination and wishful thinking poured into reality as he pictured two golden paired eyes sleepily connecting into his. Staying in bed just a little while longer till the snooze blared. Letting out a sigh, Ren began his morning ritual.
—
Checking to see his hotel door was locked behind him, Ren jiggled the nob. "Ricky! No running!" A familiar stern voice cried out. Small fast footsteps toddled louder to the side of him. Rushing pain emerged to his stomach while Ren turned. The events happen to quick, wincing at the agony of his wound up muscles. Pale from either the pain or the fear, Kuon couldn't decide.
His sights first landed on a small six year old with dark chocolate hair cheekily smiling up at him, "Sorry mister". Then his sight strode to the honey blonde whose piercing stare cut right through him. The little boy did a double take between the two. "You…" Her voice still sounded the same even after all these years. Just as cold and stern. Ren was looking into the eye of the storm with sirens blared in his ears. His heartbeat was in a state unsteady thumps. His mouth swallowed up a dry pill causing strain in his voice, "Tina."
—
End of Ch.18
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A/n: Hi! I hope you are enjoying the story! I think we are getting close to the final bits of it all. I had to take a bit to regroup this story and figure out what I truly want at happen. Hopefully it will fill in a lot of open ended wholes. And hopefully will leave everyone here satisfied. I don't think this story will go longer then like 25 ch. (Even then that is generous.) Currently I'm writing ch 20. And I can just say wow. I haven't written an actual story before.I mostly have done one shots or something under 3 chapters and to add to that, this reaching 20 chapters just amazes me. lol I did not think I had it in me. Thank you so much for sticking around.
PS: By the time of writing this chapter (spoilers) Ren and Kyoko are finally interacting again! The drought is over! I am so happy! It looks like they might be going on a picnic too! That was one of my idea's for KyokoRen week! ahh ! (Which I didnt finish the week because of timing. Whoops But that story IS up lol)
