Chapter Fourteen
A/N: Fair warning: Strong sexual content. Read (and review, please!) at your own risk! Hope you enjoy!
Her arms encircled his neck as she gave in fully to his kiss. Her body relaxed into him, the feeling of safety and security enveloping her. The world around them fell away, and it was just them, exploring a new chapter in their story.
His hand slid up her back, into her hair. It tangled there for a few moments, and then moved down to her waist when their kiss intensified. His senses demanded to feel her smooth skin, and he pulled up her top just enough to put his hand under the hem of her shirt. He allowed it only to stay in that one spot, relishing the feeling of her skin warming under his touch.
Her heart quickened at the feel of his warmth on her bare skin. It was exciting and sensuous, but it also made her thoughts race. Her desire was nearing the point of no turning back, of not wanting to turn back. She felt her resolve melting quickly. She knew they would be great together, but was it too soon? Would it ruin their friendship? As their passion built, so did her turmoil. She scrunched her eyes tightly shut against the thoughts and her eyebrows became pinched. Her body screamed for more physical contact, while the voice in her head telling her to stop gained the upper hand. Reluctantly, she broke from the kiss, placing her palm against his chest tenderly.
She caught her breath and smiled warmly at him. "Alex, I think…I think we should call it a night." She studied his reaction, but did not see the irritation she was expecting.
"If you want to wait, we'll wait. I don't want you to do anything you're not ready to do."
She sat back on the couch and sighed, frustrated with herself. "I don't want to wait, but my thoughts are all over the place. I just need a little time. Does that make any sense?"
He moved next to her and put his arm around her. "It makes perfect sense. Take all the time you need. I'll wait for you." He kissed the top of her head tenderly.
She leaned in and pressed her lips to his, quickly, to avoid herself from completely abandoning her resolve. "Good night, Alex."
He smiled his crooked grin at her. "Night, Mer. Sleep well!"
She chuckled, knowing neither of them would sleep well, and headed upstairs.
Once in her room, she closed the door and leaned against it, fighting the urge to run back down to him and drag him upstairs. After a few calming breaths, she went through her nightly rituals, and got into bed. She lie awake for quite some time before sleep over took her.
"I want you, Meredith. Right here, right now. And I know you want me, too." Alex was now clearly visible to her, sitting next to her on the gurneys in the tunnels.
"I do, but it's too soon. It will ruin everything."
"It can only make things better. A lot better." He leaned in to kiss her.
She sat up with a start, then groaned. She grabbed her phone and checked the time. Without hesitation, she dialed.
"So? Who is he?" Cristina said upon answering.
"Are you sitting down?"
"If you say Owen, I don't think we can continue our friendship."
"Nope. Not Owen." Meredith felt her heart pound as she prepared to tell Cristina the identity of the man in her dreams.
"Okay, I can't take it. Tell me!"
Meredith took a deep breath. "It's Alex."
There was a long silence. "Cristina? Are you there?"
Suddenly, hysterical laughter flooded the line. "Evil spawn is your secret midnight kisser?" She choked the words out in between laughter.
Meredith sighed and rolled her eyes. She hadn't even told her the big news yet. "Are you done? Cuz there's more." She said, sounding impatient.
"Oh don't tell me you jumped his bones when you found out it was him." She started laughing again.
"Cristina! I'm serious!"
It was another moment before the laughter died down. "Okay, okay. I'm listening. What's up?"
"Something's happened," she began.
"What? Don't leave me hanging!"
"Okay, so I was in surgery with Jo when she asked me for advice on Placement interviews, and revealed she'd always wanted to go to Mass Gen. It really threw me. In all this time, I never realized that she could leave."
"And he would leave too."
"Yeah. I – I felt like my world was imploding. All of a sudden, I realized I couldn't imagine my life without Alex. I barely made it through that surgery. I got out of there, and wound up on that bench in front of the hospital, where Alex found me. He didn't realize she was planning on leaving either. I told him to be happy, and that knowing he's out there in the world and happy would have to be enough for me."
"You were letting him go."
"Yeah."
"Whoa."
"I left him there, and I came home. He showed up a couple of hours later and told me what happened after I left."
"Which was?"
"They got in a huge fight and she broke up with him. And she told him…" her voice trailed off, not sure how she'd react to this.
"What? What did she tell him?" Cristina asked impatiently.
"She told him that he and I better figure out that we love each other so no one else has to get hurt."
The silence on the other end was not followed by laughter this time. "Oh my God Mer!"
"Right?"
"So then what happened?"
"Well we talked for a while. We both admitted we were thinking about what she had said, and we admitted that we both had thought about it before. He...asked me on a date."
"Well what did you say?"
She sighed deeply, blissfully remembering the evening. "I said yes. We went out tonight. He took me to a trendy, beautiful restaurant. We talked and laughed the whole time. Afterwards, he took me on a walk on the marina. He gave me his jacket when I got cold. And we kissed. A lot. He's a really great kisser! Then we came back here and there was some more kissing."
"And you freaked out?" Cristina prompted.
"I can't lose him, Cristina. I'm so worried it could ruin everything. So I went to bed, alone, he's sleeping on the couch, and I need a reason not to run down there and finish what we started."
"That's a lot of information to take in!"
"Cristina! Help me!"
"Okay, okay, calm down. What do you want to do?"
"I want this, but how do I know it won't ruin our friendship? I don't know if I want to risk that. What if I screw it up? What if he screws it up?"
"You're not going to screw it up. Neither is he."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Okay, I'm going to tell you something. Do you remember the last time the three of us were at Joe's?"
"Yeah, and I had to leave because Zola was sick."
"Yeah. Well, I told Alex that you were his responsibility, his person, now. I couldn't leave without knowing you were going to have someone. I told him there were five of us, and it can't just be you. I told him he has to look out for you. I needed to know that he was going to take care of you. He got quiet, and I wasn't sure what he was going to say. I really wasn't expecting what came next. He said he was so upset when he thought he ruined your chance at having a family. He went to the court and tried to get some information on your case. When that didn't work, he basically pimped out his services as a doctor to get the name of the judge. He got access and pleaded with him to give Zola to you and Derek. That's why the hearing was cancelled."
Tears streamed down her face. "I can't believe he did that!" she said.
"Yeah, that's what I said! I told him he could've gone to jail for attempting to influence a judge. He said if it got you a family, it was worth it. He's willing to go to jail if it would make you happy. That's how I knew you'd be okay. That's how I know he won't screw this up."
"How have I never heard about this?"
"He didn't want you to know."
Meredith shook her head. "Typical Alex. Take all of the blame and none of the credit."
"So, gonna go get your evil spawn freak on?"
Meredith laughed while at the same time she wiped her tears. "Yeah. Thanks, Cristina."
"Anytime."
Meredith disconnected the call. She sat, absorbing this new information. She needed to see him. She got up, crossed to the door and navigated the stairs. She rounded the corner, and could make out his silhouette on the couch.
She put her hand on his shoulder. "Alex?"
He turned to her and smiled. "Hey. You okay?"
She said nothing, just took his hands and pulled him up. She turned, and led him up the stairs.
As soon as the bedroom door closed behind them, she engulfed his mouth with her own. She moved him backwards towards the bed. A small moan escaped her as she felt his hand slide under her shirt, slowly, teasingly, sliding upwards towards her mounded flesh. Just before reaching it's intended location, he was suddenly keenly aware of whom his partner was in this tryst and he stilled his questing hand. This time it was he who broke from the kiss.
"Mer?" he said, his voice raspy with desire.
"I'm sure, Alex." She answered him breathlessly, anticipating the question. It was all the permission he needed. He locked eyes with her as he removed his shirt, then grasped the hem of her shirt. She raised her arms in acquiescence, and he removed the garment easily.
His hand resumed it's onward climb, savoring the feeling of her satiny skin, while his mouth turned to her neck, nuzzling it softly, enjoying the feeling of her supple skin against his scruff. He took her earlobe into his mouth gently, teasing the salty-sweet flesh with his tongue, making her go weak in the knees.
His hot breath on her neck sent delicious shivers shooting down her spine. She tightened her grip on his neck and moaned softly. Her hands traced the muscled planes of his back, sliding down his skin slowly, committing every groove to memory.
His hand closed over her breast, tracing slow circles over the already stiffened peak, eliciting another small moan from her. He left her earlobe and returned to her mouth, kissing her hard on the lips. He raised his head and looked into her eyes as his other hand moved south over her flat mid-section and paused when it reached the waistband of her sweat pants. He hooked his thumbs into the waistband and bent down to remove them.
He returned to her mouth and kissed her hungrily. An urgency was building in her that longed for release. The dream flashed through her mind, "You do see me, Meredith."
He gave her one last deep, hot kiss before he slowly slid down her body, tracing a hot, wet line with his mouth as he went until he was kneeling in front of her. With both hands, he grasped the waistband of her panties and slowly, very slowly, pulled them down, kissing each inch of her skin as it was revealed. His heart pounded in his ears, a delicious mix of excitement and nervousness. He stood and moved her backwards, seated her on the edge of the bed and finished divesting her of the garment. She moved herself backwards on the bed in anticipation of him. He stood and stared at her disrobed form, breathing heavily. His eyes slowly traveled up her body, as if committing every detail to memory.
He removed his remaining clothing, and it was her turn to gaze upon him in all his glory. She slowly let her eyes rove over his male form, pausing when she reached his masculinity. A sly smile played upon her lips while she unintentionally chewed on her lower lip. She traveled back up his body and once her eyes met his again, she raised an eyebrow, still gnawing on her lower lip. This was more than enough to spur him into action. Throbbing with desire, he placed his hands on her knees and slid them upwards towards the junction between her thighs. When his hands were about an inch from their intended location, where they were close enough to feel her heat, he gently pressed against her thighs. He placed one knee, then the other, on the bed between her thighs and sat back on his heels.
She sighed deeply as she opened herself to him, yearning for the throbbing ache between her thighs to be remedied.
His hand explored her outer area slowly, thoroughly, making sure she did not want to stop, that she didn't change her mind. When it was clear to him that she wished for this to continue, he cautiously parted her folds with two fingers. He caressed the inner folds, and rubbed his thumb against her most sensitive area, sending delirious spasms through her body. He heard her noises intensify, and he knew he wouldn't be able to continue this much longer.
He advanced towards her, and had soon positioned himself in line with her, hovering over her. He raised his eyes, and saw the rapturous look in hers. He pressed himself against her and paused briefly at her opening to delay the immense gratification of being joined.
There had been enough uncertainty and hesitation for her. With a throaty growl, she lifted her hips to him, wanting him urgently.
He leaned in to her and kissed her with a great intensity that left them both winded. It was in this moment that he locked eyes with her and completed their union.
She gasped in surprise at the euphoria she felt at the fusion of their bodies. The pleasure of being joined was overwhelming, and he grunted his approval. He stilled his body momentarily to allow his brain to acclimate to the intoxicating sensation of being sheathed in her warmth.
As they began to move together, she wrapped her legs tightly around him, her ankles pressing against the back of his thighs. She tightened her grip around his shoulders, irrationally afraid if she let go he would disappear. She had always needed him, would always need him. In fact, she realized she couldn't live without him. The pleasure continued to build to a frenzied state. "Oh, Alex!" she whispered, breathlessly.
His muscles vibrated with a strong desire that intensified rapidly. He wasn't ready to have this feeling end, and he tempered his passion the best he could, making small, slow movements. He looked at her and could tell she was nearing completion. She drew rapid, ragged breaths as her face was turned up to the ceiling, eyes closed. Her movements had been getting less and now she was mostly still, so close to release.
The explosion of sensation had been building in her for quite some time and now had reached it's peak. As he once more pressed down on her, she cried out his name, perhaps a little more loudly than she had intended. Her excitement intensified his own and he quickly joined her as they floated, their hearts pounding.
As their breathing normalized, he rolled off of her and gathered her in his arms. Blissful smiles adorned their faces as they stared into each other's eyes, digesting a moment neither believed would ever happen.
