A/N: Guess who's alive? Me! And just in time for the Switch to come out. Honestly I'm so excited to finally play Breath of the Wild that I can't contain myself. I tried to watch and read as little about the game as I could so that I could experience everything the game has to offer firsthand when I play it myself! So no spoilers please :)
To the chapter!
Chapter 55: Nintendo Switch Part 2
Honestly, the prospect of riding to a dinosaur island with a witch on a four-foot broomstick sounded crazy. But Toon Link was actually excited. He remembered one time when Link let him ride his loftwing. It was so fun that Link had to use his hookshot to get him to come back down.
Toon Link hopped onto the broomstick behind Ashley.
"Hey, you're not gonna go very far if you don't hold on to something."
"But there's nothing to hold on to… oh."
"Ok, are we all set?!" Ashley said, Toon Link's arms around her waist. She took out her checklist. "Food? Check. Water? Check. Defibrillator?"
"Wait, why would we need-"
"Check. And GOOOOOO!" She kicked the broomstick as a cowboy would kick his steed. The broomstick shot out of the window at a speed at almost double Link's loftwing.
"AHHHHHHH!" Toon Link yelled. He let go of Ashley instinctively and almost fell off. Luckily, his hand found the "broom" part of the broomstick. Unluckily, he was now dangling off the edge of a broomstick flying several hundred feet above the air, and it was rising fast.
"ASHLEY! Go back down!" Toon Link yelled through the roaring wind.
"No can do, Fairy boy!" Ashley yelled back. "I only have enough fuel to make this trip once! Just hang in there, I'm sure you'll do fine."
The broomstick rose and rose until they were almost to the thick layers of cloud. For sake of laughs, there was a thunderstorm going on.
"Wait, don't tell me we're actually going to go through the storm clouds? What if he get hit while going through?"
"Of course we're not flying above the clouds. We're just gonna stay below the clouds where we can get hit by lightning for the whole two hour trip. Yeah, that makes more sense than going to the safe area above."
"Ok, ok, I get it." Toon Link said. "Jeez, you're really mean."
"Thanks, I know." Ashley said as she pulled the broomstick into the clouds. "Hang on!"
Toon Link saw the cloud hit his face, and then he was in complete darkness. The thunder sounded like someone setting off a bomb directly next to his eardrum. He could barely breath; the air was more water than air. Once or twice a flash of blinding light it hit his eyes, and he could barely make out the silhouette of Ashley. She appeared to be holding the defibrillator above her head, as if it was protecting them. Finally, the big blue sky burst into his vision again.
"Whew, that was intense." Ashley said. "Now that we have reached cruising altitude, I can help you up now."
She helped Toon Link back onto the broom. "That defibrillator I brought was to absorb the lightning that would've hit us. Thankfully lightning only tried to hit us twice. It broke after the second hit." She tossed the broken device into the black sea below.
"What kind of defibrillator can absorb lightning?"
"Well, mine can." She said, smirking. "Now, I'd get comfortable if I were you. We still got two hours until we reach Yoshi Island"
"Well, it's kinda hard to unwind on a four foot broomstick." Toon Link said.
"Heh, you're right. Guess we'll have to change that…" she reached to the underside of her broomstick and pressed a hidden button. Toon Link hadn't even realized it was there. The broom immediately started to transform. It stretched around itself, creating a carpet of wood all around him. All of a sudden Toon Link was standing on a huge airship. It was shaped like a pirate ship except without any sails since it was powered by Ashley's magic. The whole thing was painted various shades of black and dark red and there were statues of gremlins and gargoyles lining the edges of the ship.
Toon Link stared at the ship in amazement. It glided through the air effortlessly, and was bigger than the biggest of sports stadiums.
"Wow! This is amazing!" Toon Link gasped. "All of this was hiding inside the broomstick?"
"Aye aye!" Ashley said. She was now dressed in dark pirate grabs. Toon Link didn't even know when she had time to change.
"She's a real beaut, ain't she?"
"You bet she is!"
"Hey, yer aunt in yer pirate garb yet, matey!" She threw a couple of rags at him. "Cmon, mate! This ship is powered on authenticity! Ye gotta walk the walk and talk the talk!"
"Er… ok." Toon Link said. "Is there a bathroom or something anywhere?"
"AUTHENTICITY!" Ashley yelled, slapping Toon Link. "Ye gotta talk like this, ye see? Also, there be no bathroom, so ye gotta change out he-re."
"Oh, uh… aye aye, captain! I will, uh, I mean- I be changed in a jiffy!"
"That's more like it!" Ashley said.
Toon Link started to take off his shirt when he noticed that Ashley was still looking at him. "Er, captain, sir. Would he mind not, uh, laying yer eyes upon me while I undress?"
Ashley's eyes widened and her face got as red as her clothes. "R-right! I'll just stand… over… there."
Meanwhile, back at the smash stadium, a conference was being held.
Mario (in Link's body) walked to the podium and cleared his throat.
"Uh, thanks for-a coming, guys. There's something we-a all need to discuss."
"Hey!" Ike called, flexing his muscles for the third time this minute. "What's with the Italian accent, Link?"
"Well, here's the thing; I may be-a Link, but I'm not Link. I'm-a Mario. The twelve of us switched bodies." Mario said, addressing the other original smashers.
A collective gasp rose in the stadium. Peach fainted. Bowser roared. Pit ran away, arms flailing. Marth discovered that he could reach altissimo.
"Yes, yes, it's-a pretty surprising and a little jarring, especially for us twelve. That is why we have decided to postpone our annual Doubles Challenge Week until this is fixed."
Doubles Challenge Week. Each year, the smashers would randomly be sorted into teams of two, and over the course of the week the teams would battle one another to prove which team was superior. The perfect team builder exercise (according to Mario).
The postponing of the event caused an even bigger uproar than the earlier announcement of the switched bodies.
"I've been working out for weeks in preparation for this! In a week all this muscle mass will be gone!"
"Ook Ook (all of my protein enhanced bananas will expire soon)!"
"We've always done the Doubles Challenge Week on the last week of March! It's bad mojo to stop the tradition."
Mario and Link were bombarded with complaints. How they managed to regain control over the meeting was beyond me.
"Ok, we understand you concerns," Mario (in Link's body) said, "but with the body switch fiasco, the results may be skewed."
"Yeah, well last year I stubbed my toe right before Challenge Week, and you didn't postpone it!"
"But that was just a stubbed -"
"Yeah, why do you guys get special postponing privileges and we don't? Just because you guys are original smashers? That's not fair!"
"Yeah!"
"He's right!"
"That's a guy?"
"Alright, alright! We get it!" Link (in Mario's body) said. "We won't postpone the Challenge Week. I guess us original smashers will have to get used to our new bodies for the competition. Meeting adjourned!" Link (in Mario's body) said as Mario (in Link's body) looked at him in disbelief.
To be continued…
A/N: Also, sorry for not posting in a while. School and college preparation has been so stressing that all my free time has been spent stressing about school. You know that feeling when you have free time so you don't do anything, but you start to freak out because you aren't doing anything productive? That's me 24/7 now. Still, I still have a lot of passion for this story, so thanks to everyone who's patient enough to keep reading!
Until next chapter!
