AN-This oneshot takes place after the seddie arc, and in it, Sam and Freddie aren't dating.
...
Bulletin
"Sam! Stop it!" Freddie yelled. "Give me back my laptop!"
"After I check my email," Sam said.
"I was right in the middle of posting a new bulletin on my blog!" Freddie exclaimed. "And now you lost it!"
"And I'm sure your ten followers will be so disappointed," Sam scoffed, rolling her eyes.
"Oh yeah? And I'm sure your empty inbox could've waited!"
"Hey, I get ten times as many emails as you!" Sam snapped. "The only person who emails you is your mom giving you your little reminders to take your special vitamins."
"Let me see your inbox then," Freddie said, reaching for his laptop. "If you're so popular."
"No way, Benson!"
"You look through my inbox all the time!"
"Is it my fault you make such easy passwords?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes. "FYI, 12345 isn't exactly a strong password!"
"What are you two arguing about now?" Carly groaned, coming downstairs.
"Sam's being her usual self, that's all," Freddie huffed, crossing his arms.
"Freddie's being a nub-faced loser, like always."
"You know, you two," Carly sighed. "You'd think after spending, what was it, like a month dating, you'd be able to get along better?"
"No, because I'm still mad at this one for taking away that month of my life," Sam said. "That's time I'll never get back, Carly!"
"Hey!" Freddie said indignantly.
"Sam, be nice, or no frozen yogurt for you tonight," Carly said.
"Frozen yogurt? What happened to ice cream?" Sam frowned. "You know, the real stuff?"
"Frozen yogurt's healthier," Carly pointed out. "Besides, this place is really cool, it's all modern and fun, you'll like it."
"Is it cool if I just stay here while you two have your little 'Girls Night'?" Freddie asked. "My mom's going through my baby album across the hall..."
"Yeah, sure, Spencer should be back from Socko's soon," Carly said. "You ready, Sam?"
"Yeah, here, nub," Sam said, closing Freddie's lap top and tossing it back to him.
"Careful!" Freddie cried. "This is the new Pearbook Expert!"
"I don't care!" Sam said, heading out of the apartment with Carly.
...
"See, I told you this place was cool," Carly grinned as her and Sam sat at their table, eating their frozen yogurt.
"I did like the fifty-foot toppings bar," Sam said.
"I know you did," Carly laughed. "You think you put enough chocolate chips on your yogurt?"
"I can't believe you just showered yours with fruit," Sam cringed.
"Hey, I haven't gotten to eat any fruit all week; Spencer's using all of ours to make some sculpture."
"A fruit sculpture?" Sam frowned.
"No, I think it has something to do with a clown," Carly said. "Hey, look over there. It's Jenna Whaler from English."
"Oh yeah," Sam said, turing around to look at their classmate, who was standing by the topping bar. "I hate her."
"Big surprise," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "It looks like she's here by herself, should we invite her over?"
"No! She's alone for a reason, Carly!" Sam hissed. "No one likes her!"
"Well maybe she's nice," Carly reasoned. "I'm going to call her over. Hey, Jenna!"
"Ugh, I'm going back to making you those videos on how to be meaner," Sam groaned.
"Oh, hey you guys," Jenna said, walking over to the girls.
"Hey, Sam and I were just hanging out," Carly smiled. "And we were wondering, if you weren't here with anyone, if you'd like to hang out with us."
"Hmmm, well, I guess that'd be fun," Jenna shrugged. "I was actually meeting some friends here, but um, they just called and said that all their cars broke down. Weird, right?"
"Oh, yeah," Sam mumbled.
"So, um, you like frozen yogurt?" Carly asked Jenna.
"It's okay I guess," Jenna said. "Hey, not to sound rude or anything, but I was watching your last iCarly the other day, and I found a few corrections that could be made."
"Oh," Carly blinked. "Well, um, yeah, you could tell us and then we could try and fix them."
"Where's Freddie?" she asked. "Most of them are about his camera work."
"He's at home, being a lonely nub," Sam said.
"Really? I thought he'd be here with you," Jenna said. "If I had ever dated a boy-I mean, when I was dating my last boyfriend, who's totally real and went to boarding school, I'd be spending my Saturday nights with him, but I guess you two don't-"
"Um, Freddie and I aren't dating anymore," Sam said quickly. "We broke up ages ago."
"Oh, I didn't know," Jenna said. "Well that's good. I always thought he was kind of ugly looking."
Sam nearly choked on her yogurt.
Jenna glanced down at her own yogurt. "I'll be right back. I'm gonna get more gummy bears..."
"You see why no one likes her!" Sam hissed once Jenna was out of earshot.
"She was kind of obnoxious," Carly agreed. "So let's just finish up out yogurt and then we can make up an excuse to leave and-"
"And she thought I was still dating that nub," Sam continued angrily. "How dare she!"
"Well maybe she-"
"And who the heck does she think she is, calling Freddie ugly?" Sam snapped. "Her face looks like it got run over by a bus and then stomped on by a donkey!"
"Um..." Carly frowned.
"Like that chick could ever get a hot guy like him," Sam mumbled.
"Did-Did you just call Freddie hot?" Carly asked.
"What? No," Sam said quickly.
"But-But you said-"
"No, no I didn't," Sam said firmly. "I think someone needs to lay off the kiwi."
"But I heard you-"
"I'm gonna run to the bathroom," Sam said, setting down her yogurt. "Try and get rid of Jenna while I'm gone."
"Wait! Sam!" Carly called after her best fried, but Sam determinedly ignored her.
She stepped into the restroom, and after making sure all the stalls were empty, she pulled out her phone and brought up her inbox. She scrolled down until she found the old emails from Freddie that he had sent her when they had been dating: her guilty pleasure.
She would find herself reading them whenever she couldn't seem to get the stubrag out of her mind, and right now, much to her dismay, her mind seemed to be swimming with images of Freddie Benson.
