Lesser

"You swear this will come off?" Freddie asked Sam for the third time, frowning as he looked at his forearm, which had a large image of a skunk on it.

"Yes, I told you, it's Henna," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Get over it."

Sam and Freddie had been out in Texas at the big Puckett family reunion, and after spending a whole weekend with nearly two dozen Pucketts, Freddie was very relieved to be on a plane back home to Seattle.

"I still can't believe your aunt gave this to me while I was sleeping," Freddie mumbled.

"You shouldn't have insulted her," Sam shrugged. "How did I insult her?" Freddie frowned. "The only thing I said to her was that her three bean salad was good. That's a compliment!"

"That wasn't three bean salad, Freddie," Sam sighed. "That was her special chile recipe that she learned in therapy."

"Oh," Freddie said, blinking. "Well...still, is that any reason to give me a skunk tattoo? My mom's going to kill me!"

"Well just tell her we shared a hotel room, and she'll forget all about being mad at the tattoo," Sam grinned.

"Please, I think that'd give her a heart attack," Freddie laughed. "I mean, she still isn't exactly happy with us dating,even though its been almost three years!"

"I know, she's crazy," Sam agreed. "Even crazier than my cousin Luke who chased after you with that rake and tried to get you to-"

"I'd like to try and forget that, actually," Freddie said quickly.

"Oh, I got the whole thing on video," Sam laughed. "Trust me; I'm not going to let you forget it."

"People think I make these stories up, you know," Freddie said, shaking his head.

"Whatever, I'm hungry," Sam said.

"What, the five tons at bacon you ate at your grandparents place before we left didn't fill you up?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"That was for breakfast!"

"It was an hour ago!"

"Exactly!"

"I think I see the food cart coming around now," Freddie told his girlfriend, chuckling lightly.

Sure enough, a moment later a flight attendant stopped by Sam and Freddie's seats and offered them peanuts and small bottles of water.

"Anyway, Sam," Freddie said, tossing his peanut bag onto the tray in front of him. "You have to promise that you won't it slip to my mom that we shared a hotel room on this trip, let alone a bed."

"Dude, we just finished our second year of college," Sam said. "Did she really expect us to go and get separate rooms?"

"Yup," Freddie nodded.

"She really is nuts," Sam said.

"I know," Freddie sighed. "But you know, it wouldn't kill you to try and get along with her a little better."

"I do try!" Sam exclaimed.

"Baby, you were about to throw a chicken leg at her last week."

"But I didn't," Sam pointed out. "And I only wanted to because she told me that my sneakers were the filthiest thing she'd ever seen! See, my family didn't do any of that stuff to you this weekend, did they?"

"Um, again, I woke up with a skunk on my arm," Freddie reminded her.

"Okay, other than that," Sam said quickly. "And anyway, we already decided you deserved that."

"Plus, your Uncle Jimmy kept asking you what you saw in me when I was sitting right next to you!"

"He was curious, he liked you," Sam said.

"He said it looked like his five year-old grandson could beat me up!"

"Well, that kid's pretty tough," Sam shrugged. "Nearly as tough as I was when I was his age..."

"And your cousin Ricky-"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Sam said. "But you don't have to deal with those guys back at home. I have to deal with your mom all the time!"

"Yeah, that's true," Freddie nodded. "And I guess for having to see her nearly everyday, you do keep your cool surprisingly well."

"Thank you," Sam said, satisfied.

"Well, at least my mom won't be home when we land," Freddie said, opening his bag of peanuts. "She's still down visiting her sister. She apparently got her wart back again..."

"You have a real attractive family," Sam said, chuckling. She opened her own bag of peanuts.

"I know, sometimes I wonder how I turned out all right," Freddie said.

"Well, I wouldn't say you're completely problem free," Sam frowned, looking down at her peanuts. "Hey, how come you have more in your bag than mine?"

"I dunno," Freddie shrugged, popping a few peanuts into his mouth.

"Trade with me," Sam said, grabbing her boyfriend's bag and stuffing her own into his hand.

"Hey!" Freddie exclaimed. "Give those back!"

"No way, I already told you, I'm hungry!" Sam said.

"So? Eat your own bag of peanuts then!"

"I told you, my bag is smaller than yours!" Sam said. "Come on, you're going to make your girlfriend starve?"

"Well maybe if you asked nicely, I would've traded with you," Freddie told her. "You promised after that steakhouse incident, that you'd at least ask before swiping food out of my possession, and-"

"Look, boyfriends are always supposed to make sure that their girlfriends never have lesser food than them," Sam said.

"Less."

"What?"

"You should've said 'Boyfriends are always supposed to make sure that their girlfriends never have less food than them,'" Freddie said.

"You are not giving me a grammar lesson on this plane," Sam said, narrowing her eyes.

"I just thought you'd like to know that you made a grammatical error," Freddie said. "See, now that I told you, you'll never make that mistake again!"

"Do I need to push you out of the plane?" Sam frowned. "Again."

"There are no parachutes on this plane, like there were on the one to Japan," Freddie pointed out.

Sam rose an eyebrow. "Who said you got a parachute?"

"You wouldn't push me out of the plan," Freddie grinned. "Would you, Sam?"

"How much you want to bet I would?" Sam asked.

"Sam..." Freddie said, still smiling.

"Fine, no, I wouldn't," Sam snapped.

"I knew it," Freddie laughed. "You love me too much, don't you?"

"Shut up."

"Aw, see, you do love me," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam. "And I love you too, Sam."

"Well then can I have your peanuts?" Sam asked.

"Yes, you can," Freddie nodded, leaning closer to her to kiss her.

"Um, excuse me," the flight attendant said, walking over to Sam and Freddie's seats. "We're going to have to ask you to keep it down...we've had some complaints."