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"Ugh, here it is, Friday night," Carly Shay sighed, leaning back on the sofa in her and Spencer's living room. "And I have nothing to do."

"Can't you call up Gibby?" Sam asked, running a brush through her hair, sitting down next to her best friend. "Hang out with him tonight."

"I can't, he's at some cat fair," Carly said.

"Hey, if you're bored tonight," Spencer said, walking out of his room. "Why don't you help me sort out my fork collection?"

"Oh, see? This is what my life's become," Carly moaned.

"Well, me and Freddie should be back from our date at around eleven," Sam said. "We'll come back here and we'll hang out together and watch a movie or something."

"No, don't worry about me," Carly said. "I don't want to rush your date." She picked up one of her fashion magazines from the coffee table. "Man. I really need to get me a boyfriend."

"Come on, Carls," Sam said. "Having a boyfriend's not that big of a deal."

"You know which girls say that?" Carly said. "The ones who already have boyfriends! I mean, you and Freddie are just like, the perfect couple; you're practically attached at the hip! I just want someone like that for me so I can spend my Friday nights with him instead of being stuck here, helping Spencer sort out his forks."

"Hey! It's a very entertaining task!" Spencer defended.

"Hey, hey," Freddie said, opening the front door of the apartment and letting himself in. "Wow, Sam. You look hot in that dress."

"I know," Sam grinned, getting up to greet her boyfriend.

"You see?" Carly said as Sam gave him a quick kiss. "Perfect couple."

"What's going on?" Freddie asked Sam.

"Carly wants a boyfriend," Sam sighed.

"And Carly's going to get one if it's the last thing she does," Carly said.

"Didn't you go on a date last week?" Freddie pointed out.

"Well, yeah, but that guy was a total dud," Carly pointed out. "He kept droning on about how the armpit hair on his left side was longer than the right the entire date."

"Gross," Freddie cringed.

"Whoa, that's pretty weird," Sam said. "Did you get pictures?"

"No, I didn't take pictures of his lopsided armpit hair!" Carly said.

"Look, Carly," Sam said. "It's not like you spend every Friday night alone."

"I know," Carly sighed. "But lately, whenever I see you guys all…coupled up, it makes me realize how happy you are, and I really do want to find someone like that for me."

"And you will," Freddie told her.

"Yeah, yeah," Carly said, looking back down at her magazine. "But I still-Hey! This is it!"

"What's it?" Sam asked.

"According to this magazine, guys really love outdoorsy girls," Carly explained, pointing to a page in her magazine. "So to get a guys attention, all I have to is become outdoorsy!"

"Um, Carly no offense or anything, but you're the least outdoorsy girl I know," Sam said.

"Yeah, Freddie agreed. "I mean, you're the one who wore brand new boots on that nature retreat we went on in school last year."

"They were cute," Carly defended. "And I can totally become outdoorsy if I wanted to. You know what? Why don't we all go on a hike tomorrow?"

"A hike?" Sam repeated.

"Sure," Carly nodded. "It'll be fun. We'll get Gibby, you guys can come…Spencer probably doesn't have anything better going on."

"Hey! Don't make assumptions!" Spencer said loudly, looking up from the forks her was sorting.

"Well, do you?" Carly asked.

"No," Spencer mumbled.

"Carly, you don't think you're being a little, oh, I don't know, crazy?" Sam asked.

"No," Carly replied. "And this could be the new hobby we were looking for!"

"I wasn't looking for any hobby," Sam said.

"Yeah, me nei-" Freddie began.

"Oh come on, guys, do you want me to stay alone and miserable forever?" Carly pouted.

Freddie sighed and looked at Sam. "She's not going to be dropping this anytime soon."

"Fine," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "We'll do your little hiking trip."

"Cool," Carly said happily. "I'd better go start planning my outfit then. Have fun on your date, you two!"

"Oh yeah," Sam said as Carly hurried upstairs. "She's really nailing this outdoorsy thing."

…..

"Okay, map, check. Water bottles, check. Bug repellant-"

"Spencer, I told you to have everything packed last night!" Carly said, walking downstairs and spotting her brother packing up his backpack.

"Sorry, I got caught up in my online solitaire tournament," Spencer yawned. "But I'm all ready now."

The front door opened and Gibby and Freddie walked in with their bags.

"Hey, you guys excited for our hiking trip?" Carly smiled.

"Yeah, I've been meaning to go hiking ever since I was a boy scout," Gibby said.

"You were a boy scout?" Freddie frowned.

"Uh-huh, up until I got kicked out for taking my shirt off at a flag ceremony," Gibby said. "I never got a change to earn my hiking merit badge, so today I'm gonna get it."

"Where's Sam?" Carly asked. "I told her to be here by ten."

"Well, she probably woke up only fifteen minutes ago," Freddie said, looking at his watch.

Right on cue, the door opened again and Sam, yawning, walked in.

"Why do we have to do this so early in the morning?" Sam moaned, dropping her bag and falling back onto the sofa. "I should still be sleeping for another three hours."

"Alright, now that we're all here," Carly said, ignoring Sam's complaints as she picked up her own bag. "Let's head out and make me outdoorsy so I can find a dude!"

"Come on," Freddie said, extending a hand to his girlfriend as Carly hurried out the door.

"Any chance of you carrying me during this hike so I can get some more sleep?" Sam asked.

"It won't be that bad," Freddie told her as she got to her feet.

"We're hiking up a huge path in the morning," Sam said. "How can that not be that bad?"

"Well, after we're done, you and I can go hang out at my place," Freddie whispered. "My mom left earlier this morning to visit her sister…"

"Sounds like a date, Fredbag," Sam said, showing a small smile.

…..

"Ugh, how much further?" Spencer panted, dragging his feet up the path.

"We've only gone a tenth of a mile," Freddie pointed out.

"So how much further?" Spencer asked again.

"Well, this trail's about twelve miles-"

"Twelve miles?" Spencer exclaimed. "That's-that's the furthest I've ever gone on my feet my whole life!"

"Where are all the boys?" Carly frowned, looking around. "There supposed to be here admiring my outdoorsiness!"

"I don't think that's a word," Sam pointed out. "Besides, every sane person's probably asleep."

"Baby, it's not that early," Freddie said.

"Hey, do you think there's any chance of us seeing some wildlife?" Gibby asked.

"Probably; there's supposed to be deer on this trail," Freddie said. "And some species of robins, and-"

"No, not wildlife like that," Gibby said. "I mean interesting wildlife. Like antelope and those giant tortoises."

"Dude, what would an antelope be doing in Seattle?" Sam asked.

"I dunno, galloping," Gibby shrugged.

"Well, can we at least stop for a water break before we go any further?" Spencer asked, sitting himself down on a large rock. He pulled out a large bottle of water.

"Okay, but make it quick," Carly said. "Maybe the cute boys are further along the trail…"

"According to this map on my pearphone," Freddie said, pulling out his phone. "We need to make a left when we get to the-"

"Ah!" Spencer cried, spitting out his drink. "That's not water!"
"Then what is it?" Gibby frowned.

"You don't want to know," Spencer said, pulling a tissue out from his pocket and furiously scrubbing his tongue with it.

"Can we just hurry up and get to the end of this trail?" Sam asked. "The sooner we finish, the sooner I can go take a nap."

"Fine," Spencer said, getting to his feet. "But does anybody happen to have any mouthwash in their bag?"

….

The five continued to hike up the trail, which as it progressed, got increasingly difficult to manage.

"We have to be close to the end now," Carly panted, wiping her sweaty forehead with the sleeve of her shirt. The hike had certainly taken its toll on her; her hair was knotty and out of control, her face was sunburnt and sweat stained and her jeans had a giant rip in one knee from the time she had tripped.

"We're not even at six miles yet," Freddie told them, looking at the pace keeper he had on her phone.

"What? But we've been hiking for hours!" Spencer exclaimed. "How do people actually find this enjoyable?"

"I know," Freddie agreed.

"Hey, I feel fine," Gibby said. "If my boy scout troop could see me now…"

"See, this is why we should've never gone hiking," Sam said, leaning against a tree. "We belong indoors with the Internet, completely blocked out from the outside world like any normal American."

"Maybe you're right," Carly sighed. "I mean, we haven't seen one hot guy this whole time…and at this point, even if we do, I look so disgusting I'd probably scare him away."

"I'd say," Spencer agreed.

"So why don't we just head back to the car," Carly continued, shooting her brother a glare. "So I can go home and take a nice bubble bath and paint my now-chipped nails."

"Thank you," Sam sighed, relieved.

"Hey, Sam!" Freddie suddenly yelled, looking at the tree she was leaning on. "Get away from that tree!"

"Cool your pus, Fredward," Sam said, stepping away from that tree. "Why are you so-"

"That tree's covered in poison ivy, Sam!" Freddie said, taking a closer look at the three-leaved plant that covered the trunk of the tree Sam had previously been resting against.

"What?" Sam exclaimed. She looked down at her bare arms, where red sloshes were already starting to appear. She could feeling her skin beginning to itch all over too.

"Hey, I had poison ivy once," Gibby said as Carly, Freddie and Spencer hurried over to Sam. "It was actually pretty fun."

"Fun?" Sam snapped. "How is being covered in gross itchy blobs fun?"

"Because, my mom gave me oatmeal baths," Gibby said, smiling at the memory. "And when I was done, she let me eat the leftover oatmeal. It was like taking a bath in a giant breakfast bowl!"

"You're really lucky I'm too busy to punch you right now," Sam muttered as she began scratching her arms and legs.

"Baby, don't scratch," Freddie told her. "Come on, we'll stop at a drugstore and get you some lotion."

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "Hopefully going back won't be as hard as getting up here was…"

….

The iCarly gang finally managed to get themselves back to civilization and back to Bushwell Plaza. They returned to the Shay's apartment, Sam still covered with pink sloshes that she was trying hard not to scratch.

"Sam, just don't think about the itch," Carly told her as Freddie helped her over to the couch.

"How can I not think about it?" Sam moaned.

"Just think about…meat," Freddie told her, taking the cap off of the lotion they had picked up on the way home. He began to rub it on her arms.

"Meat?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, still rubbing lotion on her. "After we finish here, we'll go back to my place and I'll get you anything from that ten minute delivery deli that you love so much."

"Even the triple ham slam sandwich?" Sam asked.

"I'll get you two," Freddie smiled, leaning over to give her a kiss.

"Aw," Carly smiled, watching her best friends. "See, this is what I mean? You guys are just the perfect couple."