Catherine Rollins wakes up sore, but satisfied. She's not in the mood for a run before work, so she stays in bed an extra hour snuggling with her cat. In the light of day, she's apologetic for responding to Steve's message and letting him goad her into another round of teasing. She's especially sorry for answering the phone while masturbating; she knew what that would do to him. She crossed the line, and so did he, but she needed to hear all the "fuck Cath, shit, come for me Cath, you're so sexy, God you're so hot Cath" from him to really get off. Steve and Catherine had perfected their phone sex routines during all those years of being deployed across the world from one another. Last night they hadn't missed a beat. Catherine should be happy about that, but it worried her, they were so good at avoiding talking and showing their feelings in their actions, but silent expectations breed resentment and contempt, she knows that all too well.

Catherine wants to berate herself that she's being the other woman, she's always vowed not to be that type of woman, and if she has to block Steve's number to not fall into temptation, she will. She wants him to choose her, but she's not sure he will, that hurts. It's too early for a drink, but she rolls a joint and smokes half of it. Not to be high on a work day, but just to take the edge off. One of the things Catherine's missed out on during all of her years of patriotic service is a proper drug phase; sativa was enough to give her pause about working a job where she'd be unable to use marijuana. Technically, as a Marshal, she had no business regularly smoking weed, but as long as she kept her smoking in check, there'd never been an issue.

When she sees Steve's texted her "round 2?" she ignores the message. Of course, she wants nothing more than for Steve to call her and whisper all the things he wanted to do to her and where, but she needed to do the adult thing and stop this before it got out of control. Once she's up and dressed she texts him "wrong number, think you meant to text your girlfriend." She purposefully waited until she knew he'd be taking his morning swim to respond, she doesn't want an instant "don't be like that" because she doesn't want to be like 'that' – but it's for the best.

The morning moves slow as molasses, and she's bored at work, hungry for Steve's presence. She's craving his presence which she shouldn't be, but what the hell. She calls him, and the phone goes to voicemail. She sends him a text that's discreet, but an olive branch.

CR: Doctor's at two? Take off from 13:30-14:00. I'll send the address.

SM: I thought friends didn't see Doctors. Well, I guess we aren't friends.

CR: Are you coming or not? I'm trying to work with you.

SM: I'll be there. I'm on a case so I'll try my best. If I don't, I'll reimburse you.

CR: Never mind. I'll cancel.

SM: Why? I just said I'll try to be there, Cath you know the job.

CR: Yeah, I do know the job, but if I can stop tracking Hawaii's most wanted criminals for an afternoon to work out our issues, I figured you'd be able to too. Honestly, it's okay.

SM: No, it's not. I'll be there, short of nuclear war.

CR: Ok. See you soon. Aloha.

Steve knows its rude that he's backed up from the table to look at his phone, he knows it's even more insulting when he enters his office ready to call her because she wanted to cancel. He knows she went out on a limb to invite him to therapy, he asked her to do it first, but he was caught off guard with the request. Catherine was always like a sudden storm: ferocious, all-consuming, and unexpected. Being out of sync with her for the past three years had his head spinning; he could never figure out her angle or reasoning, but he wasn't about to miss his chance.

Lynn had asked if he wanted to grab lunch, or she could come to the office, but he hadn't even considered saying yes. He didn't like bringing Lynn in the office, it felt too personal for his casual relationship with her. He wanted lunch, but he needed to get his mind right for therapy. He sees Cath's emailed him the address and a series of forms. He goes straight to his computer and prints them out, putting them into a manila folder in the locked drawer of his desk. It's only eleven, but he's buzzing. They're really about to go to therapy. He returns to the smart computer and coughs an apology. No one really cares except Danny, but he'll deal with Danny later. They're going to investigate some leads, but Steve tells them to all go ahead, he has something to handle in the office. He returns to his desk and completes all the paperwork; this therapist is too thorough, he's hesitant to give out so much information, but he knows this to gain a better understanding of treatment. Steve calls the Governor to talk over some budgetary issues that needed settling, checks on Joe White and decides a powernap on his couch will prep him for the afternoon. He locks up the manila folder and hops onto his couch, his alarm is set for 12:30, he needs that extra hour that he lost last night tossing and turning over Catherine.

When Danny and the rest of the team return to the office, it's past 1 pm, and Jerry sends a finger to his lips to indicate to be quiet. Jerry points to a snoring Steve sprawled out on his office sofa. He looks peaceful, so the team decides to let him rest; they'll wake him up at 2 to see if he wants lunch.

At 13:50 he's startled awake by his phone, Catherine's called him twice, fuck. He texts her quickly saying he'd been stuck in traffic, but was on the way, that this was important to him. He rushes to grab his manila folder, his wallet, and gun so that he can run out of the door. He sees his team is back and shit he hadn't meant to sleep that long, but he was so fucking tired today. His watch says 13:53 and he knows Catherine's gonna kill him, he doesn't have time to explain to his team where he's going. He feels terrible because he had meant to wake up earlier, tell them he had a doctor's appointment, and get caught up on the case, but there's no time. He hastily paces out of the door and uses his police sirens to get to the office. It's 14:08 by the time he's walked into the office and he sees a red-eyed Catherine sitting on a loveseat farthest away from the door. He hands the receptionist all the information needed and goes over to her. She's fucking livid, and he can feel the heat radiating off of her.

"Cath, I'm sorry. I was late, but I am here. Catherine, I'm here ok." He grabs her hand and caresses it ever so softly like she'll be able to tell his sincerity through the gentleness of his touch. She doesn't say anything, but she doesn't move her hand away. He intertwines their hands and takes his free hand to cusp her face.

She won't meet his gaze, so he leans in and whispers in her ear, "I'm here. I love you. I'm sorry I was late, I'm sorry you thought I wasn't showing because, in reality, I was breaking every traffic rule to get here. Because I want to be here with you. Cath don't be mad. Please." That please sets her off, why is everything so emotional with him? Why couldn't she get over this? He was here, holding her hand, whispering in her ear what she needed to hear. Tears roll down her face, and she's embarrassed, but none of the other patients are even looking their way. When Steve wipes her tears and kisses her forehead, she throws her head in his neck and cries, he instinctively scoops her legs into his lap and tightens his arms around her. Where is the g*ddamn doctor? It's almost 14:20. She can feel his chest tightening and knows he's getting emotional too. Maybe she'll blame this on pms in the session later, but for right now she's just trying to gain her composure.

The doctor can't apologize enough for his lateness; a patient had a medical emergency. He leads them into a quaint, dim office. There's a couch that they both sit on, but at opposite ends. It's like they're completely different people than the ones who embraced in the waiting room. Steve gives the doctor a brief once-over, he's an older Asian man with a severe face and no-nonsense body language.

"So, who wants to start first?" Dr. Lee asks, neither speaks. This isn't an uncommon experience in talk therapy, he decides to ask another question.

"How long have you been together?"

"We uh…aren't together." Steve mumbles, it pains him even to say this out loud.

"So, what's the relationship? You both are aware that I am a couple's counselor correct?"

"We were both in the Navy, we were friends with benefits for more than ten years, together on shore leave, and communicating when we weren't. A few years ago, we both left the Navy, him first, we tried to date, I kept things from him, and we broke up, subsequently reconciled. When I left the Navy, I lost someone really close to me. I was depressed, anxious, and restless, I left to make a difference in people's lives, I got recruited for a classified mission with a classified agency, and I worked there. I didn't come home often. Last year I decided to retire, and I moved back to Hawaii, I didn't tell him. When he found out he was upset, we've been talking though and want to work on being friends." Catherine states flatly; Steve wants to butt in that there's so much more to the story, but he settles knowing there are 55 more minutes of the session anyway.

"Ok. Steven, do you agree with Catherine's synopsis of your relationship?"

"Yes and no. I mean that's what happened, but there were a lot more feelings than how she told our story. I was going to propose to her, and she left, and she lied to me about where she was, which as a military man myself I knew why she did it, but it broke my trust. So, I guess yes that's what happened, but through all that, I still love her and want her in my life, but I don't trust her. She's lied to me twice, and that's one more time than I'll ever allow anyone in my life. We're here because we miss each other and we want to be a part of each other's lives, she wants me to leave my girlfriend and woo her, fight for her, and then maybe we can be together. I want to be together, but I don't trust her, so I'm apprehensive." Well shit, he's really laid it out there. He sees out of his periphery that she bristles at him saying he doesn't trust her.

"Catherine, what's your take on what Steven's shared?"

Catherine's silent, searching for the words to say all she's feeling. She feels like quitting, actually stabbing Steve because that's not fair, but it is fair. If she were Steve, she'd be untrusting too. She's so tired of saying the same thing over and over again. How many times can she apologize? How long is he gonna hold this over her head? Why is she doing all this for them just to be friends? She notices both the therapist and Steve are staring at her expectantly.

"I understand that Steve doesn't trust me. I broke his trust, I left him, and I hurt him in the one way, that crushes Steve's spirit. I know he felt deceived, abandoned, and unwanted. I am sorry for that, but I feel like he's mad at his mother, his former CO, certain government organizations, and me, but that only gets taken out on me. I take the fall for a lot of other people's bad decisions. He's forgiven them, but not me; that hurts, but it is what it is." She takes a deep breath and dabs her eye with the tissue from the tissue box the therapist has provided her.

"I joined the Navy because I love my country and I loved serving my country. I grew up Navy, so that's all I knew. More than that, the Navy provided me with the feeling of being needed and that I could make a difference in people's lives. When I left the Navy, I was lost; I didn't have an easy transition into civilian life, and I didn't feel supported. Some horrible things happened at my first job out of the Navy, and I felt like life was spiraling out of control. I needed to prove that I could give good intel again and that people wouldn't die on missions with me. I worked with Steve briefly, but it felt like I was in his world. I was his employee, his girlfriend, his friends were my friends because they loved Steve and Steve cared about me. I just wanted Steve to let me in, tell me how much he loved me, needed me, wanted me. When I got recruited I told him to move on, he later told me he couldn't wait for me and I understood. The next few times I saw him I was aware he's with someone else, moving on, but I wish he'd choose me. I love him so much, but we don't have the tools to love each other the way we need to love the other. I don't like breaking his heart despite what people think, I just want something different from him, I need to be told and shown I'm important to him. He shows me in actions, but I need words, gestures, affirmation or I get anxious and want to leave." God, she felt like she needed water, it seemed she had been speaking for hours.

"Steven do you have a response to that?" No, he doesn't. He's adept at hiding behind a façade of confidence and bravery, but deep down he feels like she's peeled back all his layers to his wounded inner child.

"Doc, I hear her, and I understand what she's saying, but I feel like I'm paralyzed by fear. She's right that I take out a lot of my anger on her that should be for other people, but keeping her at a distance seems like it will hurt less when she leaves again."

"Does it?"

"No, sir."

Dr. Lee writes something down on his legal pad. Catherine's looking aimlessly out of the window and Steve's fumbling with his hands. They're about halfway through the therapy session, and Steve's not about to waste this 50 bucks; he hates paying for things.

"We had phone sex last night." He states matter of factly as if commenting on the weather.

"How was it? Were both of you satisfied? How do you feel about it? Are you all preparing to tell your significant others about your infidelity?" Ouch. That word makes Steve's stomach flip. Why the fuck did he have to put that out there, what was wrong with him? He winces and starts talking.

"It was good. That's a problem for us, the sex is amazing – like it makes us both a little crazy, I think. Sex is how we resolve things, how we speak about things, we are much better at sex than talking. The phone call left me wanting more, but it was definitely better than physically cheating, I don't think we could stop if we started again…you know sleeping together." Steve doesn't know if she agrees, but he needs to know her thoughts. His eyes bore into her as he waits for her side of the story.

"We've been texting a few times suggestively after an incident in an elevator where we were both drunk and jealous of seeing each other with other people. The phone sex was after a night of teasing; I feel bad about it. I don't want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me which is why I don't know what to do. I want him in my life, but if I can't be with him, I can't watch him with someone else, it literally pains me. Especially because I know that if I say yes, we will sleep together and that will make things worse. I don't want to be the other woman."

"I don't want to be the other man," Steve says heatedly. "I want to be the only man. I want to be your man. I wanted you to be my fucking wife, Catherine! When I think about having kids, you're their mother. When I dream about my life, you're my wife. I was gonna propose Catherine." He's yelling at this point, he doesn't know why he's so mad.

"Yeah, but you didn't! How the fuck was I supposed to know you had that ring in your pocket. You didn't have the balls to tell me, I had to hear it from your fucking girlfriend, Steven!" She's heated too.

The therapist tells both of them to be quiet; she feels like they are in grade school again, sitting in front of the principal. Dr. Lee gives them a few minutes to gain their composure, and then he faces her.

"Catherine did you know Steve felt like this? That he wanted to be with you and envisioned a future with you." She nods yes and dabs at her eyes again. Steve's sick she's crying; she's cried more dealing with him the last couple weeks than he'd seen her cry in ten years of being with him. Steve's so fucking sick of making her cry.

"I want to be with him too, but we are at an impasse. I don't know how to get past it, and since we can't, I am worried he's gonna stay with Lynn and try to keep me as his friend. I can't be friends with him, with another woman in the picture. I just want him to forgive me, I want him to work on his trust issues, I want him to try, he's used to letting me do all the emotional work, and I'm exhausted. I do want us though, so bad. Like …." She abruptly stops when Steve's phone rings. She had seen Steve glance at his phone a few times during the session when it flashed with a notification. This time he answers it.

"WHAT?! I don't know Jerry. Figure it out. I don't care, ask Danny." He says moodily into the phone. After a minute of silence, he's yelling at Danny and Lou. Then Steve's silent a few seconds before he's back to yelling. "I don't fucking know! Figure it the fuck out. You are all in 5-O for a fucking reason. Jesus Christ. I don't need to handhold you guys through this, you've done cases without me. I'll be back in a few hours, and I want the job done! I didn't ask for excuses, and I don't want any now." Steve waits a few seconds before he excuses himself out of the door. He walks out of the reception office and into the stairwell.

Catherine's crying again and looking pleadingly at the therapist. After the shock of him walking out absorbs, she's apologizing to the therapist, grabs her backpack and tries to walk out. Dr. Lee tells her they have ten minutes left in the session, and he doesn't mind waiting for Steve, but she cares. She gives the receptionist the copay and takes the elevator to the garage. She leaves and heads back to work feeling 100 pounds heavier, one million times sadder.

Once Steve realizes he's been going back and forth with Danny for going on ten minutes, he hangs up the phone and races back into the office. When Dr. Lee tells him to come in, Steve is confused. Where is Catherine? She's gone, and her bag's gone too. Dr. Lee tells him that she left upset at him interrupting the session. Dr. Lee tells him she's already paid for the meeting. His world is crashing down. When he gets back in the car to 5-O she's not answering his text, his phone calls are going straight to voicemail. Fuck!

Steve heads into the team office and goes from one shitstorm to another.