Chapter 13: Act I Scene X Hakuna Matata
Simba was lying down on stage. The environment around him was a dessert. There were birds all around him and then a meerkat riding on a warthog and they ran right into the birds causing them to fly away.
"Wait, is that a warthog suit?" Lantern wondered.
"Looks like it is," Superman responded.
"Is that…" Diana began.
"Mmm. That's your cousin," Batman affirmed. "He's the warthog."
"And he was also voiced the male hyena," Diana added. "And it looks like Supreme Sorcerer is back as the voice of the meerkat."
The duo shooed the birds off the ground and they chuckled and laughed.
"I love bowling for buzzards," the warthog said.
"Yeah, gets them every time," the meerkat responded while brushing himself off.
"Hey, Timon, you might want to see this," the warthog said while hovering over Simba. The meerkat, Timon, walked over to his friend and saw what he was looking at. "I think it's still alive."
"Well, let's see what we've got," Timon responded. He picked up Simba's paw and saw what he was. "Ahhh! It's a lion!" He jumped onto the warthog's back and pulled on his ear's. "Run, Pumbaa, run!" Pumbaa, the warthog, knocked Timon off of his back.
"But Timon, it's just a little lion," Pumbaa told Timon. "Look at him, he's so cute. Can we keep him?" Timon got off the ground.
"Are you NUTS?" Timon exclaimed. "Lions eat guys like us."
"But he's so little and all alone," Pumbaa said.
"But he's gonna grow up," Timon pointed out.
"Oh, but maybe he'll be on our side," Pumbaa responded.
"Ha, ha, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," Timon replied. "He'll be… Hey, I got what if he's on our side?"
"Pumbaa, literally just said that," Diana pointed out.
"I know. Timon has a habit of taking Pumbaa's ideas," Batman responded.
"Isn't that rude?" Diana asked.
"Yeah, but Pumbaa doesn't seem to notice it most of the time," Batman answered.
"Maybe having a lion around isn't such a bad idea," Timon stated.
"So can we keep him?" Pumbaa asked.
"Of course," Timon responded. "Who's the brain of this outfield?"
"Uhh." Pumbaa was pretty sure this had been his idea.
"My point exactly," Timon said. "Wweh. It's hot out and I'm fryin'. Let's find some shade and get some water." Pumbaa picked up Simba with his tusks and then they ran toward stage left.
The scene changed to a small junglish area. Timon splashed some water onto Simba. Simba woke up coughing.
"You okay, kid?" Timon asked.
"I guess," Simba responded.
"You nearly died," Pumbaa informed him.
"I saved you," Timon said. Pumbaa snorted at him. "Oh, and Pumbaa help too."
"Thanks," Simba responded quietly. He then walked toward the desert area.
"He looks blue," Timon said.
"I thought he looked brownish-gold?" Pumbaa admitted.
"No, I mean he's depressed," Timon clarified.
"Oh," Pumbaa responded. He then walked over to the cub. "Hey, what's eatin' ya?"
"Nothing, he's at the top of the food chain," Timon answered. He was right in front of Simba now. He laughed at his own joke.
Flash laughed a little while the others chuckled. Batman didn't and Diana noticed.
"You find Zazu getting pounced funny but not that?" Diana questioned.
"THAT was a corny joke," Batman pointed out. "And when you've had three boys you tend to get tired of corny jokes."
Timon stopped laughing when he noticed that no one else was laughing. "So where are you from?" Timon asked.
"It doesn't matter when you can't go back," Simba said with his head drooped.
"So you're an outcast?" Timon noticed. "Great! So are we."
"What did you do?" Pumbaa asked.
"Something terrible," Simba said simply. "I don't wanna talk about it."
"Great! Cause we don't wanna hear about it," Timon responded.
"Timon!" Pumbaa "whispered" annoyed. "Is there something we can do?"
"Not unless you can change the past," Simba told them.
"You know, in time like this my buddy, Timon here, says you've gotta put you're behind in your past," Pumbaa told him.
The audience laughed and Batman chuckled a bit.
"So that's funny?" Diana said through laughs. "But the food chain line isn't."
"Yes," Batman smiled. "Because THAT was not a corny joke."
"No, no, no, amateur," Timon exclaimed. "It's you've gotta put you're past behind ya. Look bad things happen, kid, and there's nothing you can do about it, right?"
"Right," Simba agreed.
"Wrong," Timon said as he pocked Simba in the nose. "When the world turns its back on you, you turn you back on the world."
"Well, that's not what I was taught," Simba admitted.
"Well, it looks like you need a new lesson," Timon responded. "Now repeat after me, Hakuna Matata."
"What?" Simba asked.
"Ha-kun-a. Ma-ta-ta," Timon sounded out.
"It means no worries," Pumbaa informed Simba.
"Hakuna Matata, what a wonderful phrase," Timon sang.
"Hakuna Matata, ain't no passin' craz," Pumbaa sang as they made their way back to the junglish part.
"It means no worries for the rest of your days," Timon sang. Simba sat down on some leaves as they sang.
"It's our problem free philosophy."
"Hakuna Matata," Timon sang as he filed Simba's claws.
"Hakuna Matata?" Simba questioned.
"Yeah, it our motto," Pumbaa said.
"What's a motto?" Simba asked.
"Nothing, what's the motto with you," Timon responded. He laughed at his own joke then he stopped when he noticed no one was laughing he continued. "Trust me, kid. These two words will solve all your problems. Take Pumbaa for example." He started singing. "Why, when he was a young warthog."
"When I was young warthog," Pumbaa sang in an opera style.
"Very nice," Timon said.
"Thanks," Pumbaa responded.
"He found his aroma lacked a certain appeal," Timon sang. "He could clear the Savannah after every meal."
"I'm a sensitive soul though I seem thick-skinned," Pumbaa sang. "And it hurt that my friends never downwind. And ooh, the shame."
"He was ashamed," Timon said.
"Thought of changing my name," Pumbaa sang.
"Oh, what's in a name," Timon lamented.
"And I got downhearted," Pumbaa continued.
"How did you feel?" Timon asked.
"Every time that I…" Pumbaa began.
"Pumbaa not in front of the kids," Timon said as he covered his mouth.
"Oh, sorry," Pumbaa apologized.
"Hakuna Matata, what a wonderful phrase," they both sang as they did a little tap dancing. "Hakuna Matata, ain't no passin' craze."
"It means no worries for the rest of your days," Simba sang as he got off of the leaves he had been sitting on.
"Yeah, sing it, kid," Timon said as he and Pumbaa stopped tap dancing.
"It's our problem free," Timon and Simba sang.
"Philosophy," Pumbaa finished.
"Hakuna Matata," they all sang. Then a colored piece of wood came down in front of them and on it was painted vines, leaves and tree branches. Then it quickly came back up and then it showed the change of time as Simba changed from a cub into an adult. Then from stage left came Timon and Pumbaa sing,
"Hakuna Matata, Hunkuna Matata." Then emerged a young man dressing in similar attire as his "father".
"It means no worries for the rest of your days," Simba sang.
"It's our problem free philosophy," they all sang together. "Hakuna Matata, Hakuna Matata." They sang that until they were all off stage. A blackout happened.
A man dressed in a long black cloak with a hood on came on stage.
"It is now Intermission you have fifteen minutes before we start Act II," he said.
