Baffle
"You guys sure you can handle all the kids at the arcade?" Sam asked her husband as he put on his jacket.
"Yeah, you guys are gonna have eight kids with you," Carly pointed out.
"Gibby and I will be fine," Freddie said. "Besides, they'll practically watch themselves. Emma, Ashton, Quincy and Clarissa will be together the whole time and Tyler, Huey and Kirby will keep each other busy."
"What about Jason?" Sam pointed out.
"He's fourteen! He doesn't need to be watched," Freddie assured her. "Besides, he'll probably want to spend time with his old man at the pool table."
"Yeah, because that's every teenager's dream," Sam mumbled, rolling her eyes.
"We ready to go? The kids are all in the cars," Gibby said. "I have four in mine, five in yours."
"Yeah, I'm ready," Freddie nodded.
"This is gonna be so much fun!" Gibby said excitedly. "I'm gonna take down some little kids at air hockey!"
"You suck at air hockey, I beat you all the time," Sam frowned.
"Yeah, I know, that's why we didn't invite you," Gibby said, earning him a slap on the arm from Sam.
"What are you guys gonna do while we're gone?" Freddie asked.
"We're going to the mall," Carly said. "Where, for once, we won't have to deal with begging to go into every toy store we pass."
"I wanted to stay home and sleep," Sam said. "But she promised me churros…who am I to resist one of Mexico's finest delicacies?"
"We should be home around dinner time," Freddie said, giving his wife a quick kissed. "We'll pick up some pizzas on the way back."
"Cool, thanks," Sam said. "Have fun, nub."
"Call us if you need help with the kids!" Carly yelled after the men as they headed out the door.
"Alright, well if we're gonna do the mall, let's move," Sam said. "I want to get at least a quick nap in before they get back."
"Okay, let me just find my coupon for Schneider's Secret," Carly said, rummaging through her bag. "It's for half off a bra."
"Oh, I think I got that same coupon with my catalogue," Sam said. "I could use it too. Where'd I put it, though…?"
She looked through the stack of magazines on the coffee table and on the counter, but the catalogue was nowhere to be seen.
"I could've sworn I put it here," Sam frowned. "I just got it a few days ago."
"Did you bring it upstairs?" Carly suggested.
"I don't think so," Sam replied. "Hang on, I'll go check. I could've brought it up to the bedroom."
She headed upstairs and into her and Freddie's room, but the catalogue wasn't in there either.
"Ugh! The one time I decide to go shopping and I can't even get a cheap bra out of it," Sam moaned as she walked out of her room down the hall.
She passed by Jason's room, where the door was halfway open, and saw the lights were left on.
Rolling her eyes at her son's carelessness, Sam stepped into the room and flicked the switch off. Right as she was about to leave, though, she spotted a magazine sitting on Jason's bed.
At first glance, she had thought it was one of his science magazines he loved to read, but Sam then quickly realized that the cover of the magazine looked very familiar…
"What the-There's my catalogue," Sam frowned, walking over to the bed and grabbing it, a baffled expression on her face. "What is it doing in here?"
"Hey, did you find it?" Carly asked, joining Sam in the room.
"Yeah, it was in here," Sam nodded. "Weird, right? Why would it be-"
And suddenly, Sam connected the dots. "Oh my God! Jason took my magazine and was drooling over the half-naked models in it!"
"Wow," Carly chuckled.
"It's not funny, Shay!" Sam snapped. "He's way to young to be looking at this sort of stuff! He's a kid."
"He's fourteen," Carly shrugged. "Isn't that the age when boy start getting interested in girls and girls in bikinis and girls in-"
"No!" Sam retorted. "Not my kid! I can't believe this! Oh he is grounded."
"But he didn't even do anything," Carly said, somewhat amused.
"Oh be quiet," Sam mumbled, rolling up the catalogue in her hand angrily.
…..
"Look what I won, mommy!" six-year old Tyler exclaimed as him, Freddie and the rest of his siblings came back into the house later that afternoon. He was holding a giant stuffed dog wearing a fire hat.
"Wow, that thing is huge!" Sam grinned, scooping up her youngest son in her arms. "Good job, I bet you had to win a lot of tickets to get this guy."
"I may have helped him out a little," Freddie chuckled.
"Mom, look at this candy bar I got!" Emma said excitedly, holding up a slab of chocolate that was bigger than her face. "I can't wait to eat it all."
"You'll share it," Sam said firmly. "Mama loves nougat."
"You should've seen me at Skee Ball, mom, I was on fire!" Ashton said. "Can we go back to that arcade soon?"
"Sure, if your mom takes you," Freddie said, holding his stomach. "I think I got sick from that root beer pizza they had there."
"They had root beer pizza?" Sam repeated. "And you didn't bring me back any?"
"Sam, if I had brought you back any of that stuff, it would've disintegrated by now," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.
Sam turned to Jason. "What about you?" Sam asked him. "Did you have fun?"
"I guess," Jason shrugged. "I'm going up to my room!"
Sam frowned as she watched her son run upstairs.
"Hey…baby?" Sam said as the twins and Tyler ran into the living room to watch T.V.
"Yeah?" Freddie replied, popping a few antacids into his mouth. "What's up?"
"Has Jason been acting…different?" Sam asked, crossing her arms.
"Um, what do you mean?" Freddie asked.
"I mean I found this in his room today!" Sam hissed, thrusting the Schneider's Secret catalogue at him. "He was going through it a gawking at the girls in there!"
"Really?" Freddie chuckled.
Sam narrowed her eyes. "Dude! Not funny!"
"Well Sam, he's a teenager now," Freddie shrugged. "You know, puberty and all."
"So what?" Sam snapped. "He's not allowed to be looking at this kind of stuff!"
"Okay, I'll go talk to him," Freddie said. "I'll tell him it's not right for him to drool over women like this. It's degrading and inappropriate and-"
"Just tell him to-to-ugh! I don't know!" Sam groaned.
"Sam, it's not that big a deal," Freddie told her. "Boys Jason's age do this sort of thing all the time. I remember when I was fourteen I took this Beach Sports magazine from Spencer and hid it my room and would just sort of look at it from time to time."
"Oh, so you like ogling girls in tiny bikinis?" Sam frowned, punching his shoulder hard.
"Ow!" Freddie exclaimed. "I was fourteen! We weren't even dating!"
"You're still a jerk," Sam mumbled darkly.
"Look, Sam, what do you want me to do?" Freddie asked. "I told you, I'll talk to Jason. You keep the magazine. What else is there?"
Sam didn't reply.
"Oh…" Freddie said slowly. "I get it now."
"What do you get?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.
"You're not so upset about Jason looking at the magazine," Freddie said, a smile creeping onto his face. "You're upset that he's growing up."
"Can it, Benson," Sam retorted. "That's ridiculous! I'm not one of those crazy, clingy moms who can't let go of her kid! Maybe you're confusing me with your own mother!"
"I don't know…" Freddie grinned. "You're acting almost exactly the way my mom did when she found that Beach Sports magazine in my room. I think she had that exact same expression…"
"Yeah, well…shut up!" Sam replied lamely.
"Baby, he has to grow up at some point," Freddie told her, squeezing her shoulder gently.
"I know," Sam sighed. "But does he have to make it so obvious? If I hadn't found that catalogue in his room I could've had at least another six months of getting to believe he was still a kid."
"Sorry," Freddie said, kissing her cheek. "I know it's rough."
