Chapter 9

After I had lunch with Newt we went back to the gardens to work for the rest of the day which got boring really quickly. Zart told me that I only needed to work for a few more hours before I could leave which was the only thing that kept me going while I crouched over dirt and planted more seeds. After my hours where up I was able to leave so I went straight to the homestead to see Jeff and Clint to see if they needed any help.

Sadly they were having a really slow day so I wasn't needed. Instead of wandering around the glade aimlessly I decided to wander through the trees of the deadheads and think about the memories I had discovered.

I was still confused as to what had caused them but I already knew that I wouldn't find an answer in the glade. While I thought about the memories I couldn't stop the frown that took over my features since the only things I could remember where obviously bad. I wondered if I had ever been happy in the real world, if there had ever been a time when I had sat with my brother and my parents and had fun or if my whole life before the glade and the box and the maze had all been miserable.

When I thought back to my brother my heart clenched painfully, I didn't remember him but I did know I had been close to him and I knew he was dead. Thinking back to the memory I realised we must have looked alike so we would have looked like one of our parents but which one of them was a mystery that would forever be unanswered if we didn't get out of this place.

As the memory I had about my family replayed over and over again in my head I kept thinking about his appearance, his brown hair and his green eyes that looked so warm but had held so much hidden fear in them. Fear he didn't want his baby sister to see. Suddenly, an image of the boy I had been brought up in the box with shot through my mind and I realised with a sickening dread that he had brown hair and looked a few years older than me.

It was horrifying that I could actually tell that the boy had been my brother but what was more sickening was knowing that the people who had killed him and shot me had put me in the same room as his dead body but wiped away my memory so I wouldn't know it was my brother to begin with.

I wanted to be sick as I thought back to the way he had looked when I saw him in the box but I pushed it down and ran out of the trees to the homestead to go and find Alby. Luckily he was in the first room I looked in and was talking with Clint about something I had no interest in.

"Where was the body of the boy I came up here put?" I asked frantically, holding back the bile in my throat as I thought about how insensitive it sounded.

"The bagger buried him in the graveyard." Alby said.

I nodded my head and rushed out of the building, ignoring Clint's yells telling me not to run to fast or far because of my health. I didn't stop running until I saw Newt talking to one of the other gladers and when he saw me the smile he had on his face vanished and was replaced with a look of concern.

"Low, what's wrong?" He asked as soon as I reached him

"Can you come with me please." I asked

He nodded his head and let me grab his hand so I could drag him to the deadheads. I didn't know the way to the graveyard so after telling him where I wanted to go he led the way without asking questions. When we got there I tried finding the grave without a name on it and spotted one at the back with a stone over it to show there was a body there.

I kneeled down next to it and Newt followed but didn't ask questions, he just took my hand and sat there with me.

"His name was Caleb." I whispered without looking away from the stone

"How do you -" I didn't let him finish

"When I was in the coma I had dreams. I remembered some things about my old life and he was there. So were you." I said

Newt didn't say anything "The creators where using us and testing us before we came here I think. They started taking people in their sleep after a while. One by one someone would disappear and then they took you." I stopped talking and let that information sink in for a minute

"We had been friends before this. I think we were neighbours before the creators took us to their labs and away from our families."

"Why didn't you tell me before?" He asked

"I didn't know how. I thought you were angry with me when you didn't visit me and then I was too tired yesterday so I forgot."
Newt didn't say anything again.

"Caleb was taken by the creators two years before we were because he was two years older. After we were taken I wasn't allowed to see anyone but I would sneak out to see you every week but then you were taken away so I was isolated. Three years after you were taken I was told that Caleb had started being a problem so the creators did what they did to every other test subject that was unresponsive. They killed him.

"I found out and said I didn't want to be one of their test subjects any more. I didn't want to in the first place but I thought if I asked before I tried escaping then I would have saved some time. The main doctor agreed with me and I thought I was free but she pulled out a gun and shot me." I lifted my top to show the bullet scar on my hip

"They didn't want me dead. They wanted me weak so they could wipe my memory and send me here." I explained while Newt stared at the scar in shock

"Why would they send uh Caleb with you when you came up?" He asked

That was when I broke.

"He was my brother!" I cried, "They sent me here because I wouldn't work with them anymore just like him. I think they just wanted to get rid of his body."

I was shaking now with tears pouring down my face. I was more than sad. I was angry and hurt like I had been when I had first found out Caleb was dead. Newt put an arm around me and pulled me to him which was all it room for me to collapse into his chest and sob for what felt like hours. He held me while I cried but didn't say anything about what I was crying about.

Eventually, my sobs turned to hiccups and my eyes were out of tears to shed so I collected myself and took in a deep breath to try and get a regular breathing pattern again after exhausting myself with the constant never ending crying. Once I had finally collected my thoughts I sat up and stared at the grave again, hating how I didn't have any memories of a boy I had been close to.

"Can you give me a minute?" I whispered to Newt

He nodded his head and stood up from where he sat next to me so he could put some distance between us for me to have some privacy. Once I was alone I took in another shaky breath and then started thinking about what I wanted to say. Even though he was dead I wanted to believe that Caleb could still hear me like Newt had been when I was in my coma.

"Hi Caleb, I don't really remember a lot about you but I learnt that we were really close before all of this mess. The creators messed with my brain so I don't remember a lot of things but I remember you and Newt, the boy from before. I was in a coma a few days ago and remembered some things about my old life. You were there which was scary since I hadn't known who you were until a few days ago." I let out a soft chuckle and wiped my nose

"I remember the day the creators took you. You told me I would be okay and you would be safe. I made you promise that the bad people wouldn't hurt you and you did. You promised me you would be okay." My voice cracked

"You broke that promise." I whispered, "I'm sorry I don't remember you but I'm sure I loved you before all of this and I'm so so sorry you died."

I finished talking when I realised I couldn't think of anything else to say and then stood up from the ground so that I could walk over to Newt and hug him from behind.

"Thank you for being there for me." I whispered with my cheek pressed against his back and my arms wrapped around his torso.

"I'll always be here for you." I heard Newt whisper