Chapter Four – To the Ball

It rained for the next four days. Any hope I had of visiting with Mr. Bingley before the ball slid away with the stream of water pouring from the eaves. At least he had already secured the first dance. I had that thought to sustain me. His sisters and friend could not spirit him away from me before then and once I had him on the dance floor I would do my best to secure him. Even if my plan with Wickham went astray, I would find a way. I had come too close to fail now.

The dressmaker sent my gown by messenger on Saturday, two days before the ball. I am certain she preferred not to have Mama come pick it up and knew we could manage any final alterations ourselves. As it turned out, very little needed alteration. The gown was simply lovely, although Mama did complain when she noticed the neckline was not quite as indecent as she had directed.

Mama's complaints were not as strident as usual, however, and easier to ignore. I was experimenting with the dosage of the calming herbs I had read about on the first day of rain. I managed to find a few moments when Papa was away from his study and, knowing from Lizzy how the books were arranged, I quickly located the volume I had hoped to find. Even better, all the herbs I needed were in our still room. Using the instructions given, I was able to mix up an herbal preparation that could be easily added to tea or other drinks. I did not have the dosage quite right yet, but I hoped to come a little closer by the time we left for the ball.

Lizzy had also noticed Mama's improved mood, but she could not explain it. After some thought, she decided to accept it as gift from the heavens. I knew better but was not about to enlighten her. During our days of rain I tested the preparation on Lydia as well, but she seemed to require more for the herbs to be effective. Since I did not wish to run out, I did not dose her as steadily as Mama. All the same, I enjoyed the day I gave her a little too much and Lydia was so calm she just drifted off to sleep in the middle of a discussion about ribbons and lace. With Lydia out of the way I was able to help Mary re-trim one of my older ball gowns for her use without interruption or stolen ribbons. We made it look quite fresh and attractive once we could work without interruptions.

While we were all trapped in the house, Mr. Collins continued his courtship with great eagerness. The rest of us quickly tired of his prearranged compliments and over-abundant speech, but Mary was thrilled. I think she was feeling valued for the first time in her life. It helped that Mama was very happy with her and paid her more positive attention than she had received in the last ten years combined. I am not certain if Papa realized his middle daughter was as good as engaged, but he took every opportunity to make sport of Mr. Collins on the rare occasions they were in company together. The subject of Mr. Collins's "noble patroness," Lady Catherine de Bourgh provided Papa with a great deal of amusement during dinner and the other rare moments he was in company with us. For Mary's sake, I hoped the noble lady was not quite as overbearing as she sounded.

For the rest of the time our days were filled with all the small preparations for an event as important in our lives as this ball had become. Once the gowns were ready and hung to avoid wrinkles, there were shoe roses to make and hairstyles to choose. We decided on the perfect jewelry to match our gowns, even though that task involved a great deal of squabbling between Kitty and Lydia. And, of course, there were the seemingly endless discussions of who to dance with and what we each hoped for from the evening. I had to be very discrete on that latter subject, but that was nothing new to me.

We saw the Netherfield party at church on Sunday, which pleased me immensely. The rain had cleared enough for us to make the short journey by carriage. Even Lizzy could not countenance a walk there in all the mud, although I could tell she was dying for a solitary walk after all that time stuck in the house with us. Fortunately, I had finally gotten the right dose of herbs for Mama's morning tea, leaving her quieter than usual. She almost appeared attentive during the service that day, quite a change from her usual habit of staring at and gossiping with her neighbors. She was even beginning to enjoy the taste of the additives, which she had complained about at first despite my assurances that it was a most fashionable blend of tea. Lydia was still too loud and exuberant, but not as much as usual since I had given her a small dose at breakfast. I did not bother dosing Kitty, since she simply followed however Lydia led. Unfortunately, there was nothing to be done about Mr. Collins, but he did not embarrass us too badly with his effusive greetings when Mr. Bingley accepted an introduction. All the same, I was glad Mr. Darcy stayed back with the rest of their party instead of approaching closely enough to be forced into meeting my voluble cousin. He needed no new reasons to be disgusted by our family.

During the service, I looked to Mr. Bingley whenever I could, making certain he saw my glances and smiles. I found him nearly always looking at me, which gave me hope. I saw Miss Bingley look at our party a few times with disgust, but thankfully she was constrained to silence by the setting. I noted with interest Mr. Darcy's many surreptitious glances at Lizzy. He might end up married to her against his will or reason, but I doubted he would be too very upset once all was settled.

It was drizzling again as we returned home. I hoped, like the rest of my family, it would not turn back to a full rainstorm before the next day. Balls had been canceled for less, and a reluctant hostess like Miss Bingley was liable to seize on any excuse. Unfortunately, Mama realized the danger as well. I soon discovered I preferred to listen to Mr. Collins discuss theology with Mary rather than Mama, Kitty and Lydia speculating on the likelihood of continued rain and how dreadful it would be should the ball be canceled. I already knew how dreadful it would be. All my hopes centered on the event. If the weather did not cooperate I might lose out.

Thankfully, I was spared listening to either conversation for very long. Lizzy had even less patience for the topics than I, and she quietly asked me to join her upstairs. I quickly took the proffered lifeline and soon we were on our way.

"I had an idea for reworking the neckline of my gown earlier. If you will help me, I think it could be completed quickly and it would look so much prettier. I want to look my best for the first dance," she told me in a quiet voice, hoping to avoid catching the notice of anyone else. I knew she was thinking of the charming but false Mr. Wickham.

"I will be happy to help," I replied, and I was. It was certainly better than the conversations downstairs and I enjoyed needlework. By working together, we did finish quickly and she was correct about the improvement her idea made. I was sorry she had not been able to purchase a new gown when I had, but she seemed happy enough with this one. Aside from that, I did not know if the compromise would involve any tearing of the gown since I had left the manner of compromise up to Mr. Wickham - a mistake in retrospect. It would be a shame to ruin something new, even in pursuit of a husband. As well, she would have a new gown for her wedding when the time came, and I was certain Mr. Darcy would be generous with her pin money and clothing allowance after they were married. He might be stuffy and uptight, but there were no indications he was miserly or unkind.

All the ladies of our household went to bed Sunday night full of anticipation for the following day. After all the rain of the previous week it was a relief waking to clear skies the day of the ball. Better yet, the weather became warm enough the muddy roads began to dry. By the time we needed to leave, there was little chance of getting stuck in a puddle or ending up with mud on our gowns as we got in or out of the carriage. We had taken such care with our clothing, it was a relief to know we could keep it looking nice.

I was both delighted and surprised to see canvas laid down by the entrance for the convenience of the guests as they disembarked. I would have expected Miss Bingley to eschew such courtesy so she could have the pleasure of making fun of any guests who ended up with muddy or dusty hems. Perhaps she wanted to be seen as a good planner, or maybe she just did not want anything tracked into the house.

As I looked around the entry and the ballroom, I had to admit the decoration was tastefully done. I had no doubt Miss Bingley wanted to impress the country bumpkins with her elegance and style. Perhaps if I had not attended events in London with my Aunt Gardiner I might have been more awed by the ambiance. It amuses me how Miss Bingley considers this a desolate backwater when we are only half a day from London and most of our community has family or other ties in the city. She could be proud of what she had done with the ballroom, however. It was a beautiful sight. I expected to be equally impressed when it came time for the supper.

The room slowly began to fill up. We had, of course, been one of the first families to arrive. Mama would have seen to that even if we did not live on the next estate over. Even calmed by my special tea, she was determined to give me every chance to catch Mr. Bingley. I had no reason to argue with her methods so far, although his place in the receiving line meant he could not spend that extra time she provided by my side.

Early on, the officers in their jaunty red coats entered in a mass. They must have all traveled from the camp together. More girls than just my two silliest sisters made a beeline for the militia members once they filtered through into the ballroom. Lydia was crowing loudly that she already had a partner for the first dance, with Kitty copying her noise. I must not have gotten Lydia's dose quite right, or perhaps it was taking time to become fully effective. I hoped she would not embarrass me too much before it did.

Mr. Wickham came to collect Lizzy for their dance at just about the same time Mr. Bingley arrived to escort me to the dance floor. I did not see Mr. Darcy and began to worry a little for my plan. I could probably still arrange a proposal without Lizzy's compromise, but it would be trickier. As we headed to the dance floor together, Mr. Wickham gave me a sly wink. I hoped that meant all was well in hand for later.

"Is Mr. Darcy joining us this evening? I have not seen him in the ballroom and wondered if he was well." I asked Mr. Bingley before the music began, for my knowledge as well as for Mr. Wickham, who turned slightly to listen.

"Oh, he is well enough. My friend simply likes to avoid the first set of the evening. It tends to raise too many expectations if he partners someone for those dances. He will probably show up some time during the second set." Over Mr. Bingley's shoulder I saw Mr. Wickham brighten at the information. Whatever his plan might be, it would probably work better if Mr. Darcy did not see him right away. He and Lizzy took their places in the set.

"Do you worry about raising expectations, Mr. Bingley?" I had to ask.

He grinned at me as he answered, "I have no worry on that front at all, Miss Bennet. I think our dance will set exactly the right expectation." I hoped he meant what he appeared to be saying. I certainly had my expectations raised by the comment. One way or another I intended to accept a proposal of marriage from him before the night was through.

Mr. Bingley and I stood in our place at the head of the first set. The opening notes sounded, and the dance began. The ball at Netherfield was now officially underway.