AN-Unbelievable! Can't believe I made it to 600 CHAPTERS! And more importantly, I can't believe how amazing each and everyone of you are for keeping up with this story for this long. Whether it's by dropping me the sweetest reviews ever or coming up with really great ideas for oneshots, everybody who supports this story in any way is fantastic! Thank you guys so much!

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Vet

"I dunno, I just can't get used to hanging out a coffee house," Sam commented as her, Freddie and Carly sat down at a small booth with their lattes.

"Well the Groovy Smoothie is closed this week," Carly pointed out. "Remember? T-Bo had to go to a personal safety seminar after that whole incident with the blender the other day."
"Did that guy's eyebrows ever grow back?" Freddie asked.

"No idea," Carly replied.

"Well, I guess this place does have pretty decent coffee," Sam shrugged, grabbing a handful of sugar packets. She tore one open and began dumping it into her cup.

"I don't think what you wind up with after you add all that even qualifies as coffee anymore," Freddie chuckled.

"Lay off my coffee habits!" Sam snapped. "I don't make fun of your Parmesan cheese obsession with your pizza!"
"Interesting you should talk about people's Parmesan habits!" Freddie scoffed. "Every time we go to a restaurant, you use up their whole supply!"

"Ugh, could you two not have another argument about this!" Carly groaned. "You two are engaged. In five weeks you guys will be stuck with each other's weird food habits for life so you better get used to them."

"Trust me, Carls, I'm used to them," Freddie chuckled. "Last night I woke up to find Sam in the kitchen making herself a midnight snack of bacon and chocolate pudding."

"Well I had another Cyclops dream," Sam said. "You know their one-eye thing makes me crave bacon and pudding."

"I know," Freddie smiled, putting his arm around her. "And if you must know, I happen to think your weird food quirks are adorable."

"Aw," Sam grinned, giving him a quick kiss. "I still think you're a freak with your pizza."

"Of course you do," Freddie said, rolling his eyes as he pulled his laptop out of his bag. "Well, while we're sitting here, I think I'm going to catch up on some emails. This place has much faster WiFi than T-Bo ever paid for at the smoothie. Might as well take advantage of it."

"Oh, Carls, you are going to be real proud of me," Sam beamed, dumping her eighth packet of sugar into her coffee.

"Why?" Carly asked.

"I finally got around to picking out those bridesmaid dresses like you asked," Sam told her.

"No way!" Carly grinned. "Well let me see them!"
"Okay," Sam said, pulling out her phone. "I have three options here. Tell me which you like the best."

Carly took the phone, scrolling through the images. "Um, Sam? Er, no-no offense, but all these dresses are kind of…hideous. I mean this one has rhinestones and puffy sleeves; it makes the ones we had to wear for that Jodi chick's wedding look normal."
"Yeah, well, I was thinking," Sam said. "Since you talked me into having Melanie be one of the bridesmaids, I should make sure no one mixes the two of us up while we're up there. This way everybody will know I'm the one looking hot in my wedding dress and she's looking like she just got run over by a lawnmower."

"But I have to wear this dress too," Carly pointed out.

"Well Carly, I don't think I have time to pick out any new ones," Sam sighed. "I guess…I guess if youreally don't want to wear one of those hideous dresses in front of a whole audience, then you could just pick the dresses."

"Fine," Carly said. "I'll pick the-wait a minute! You picked ugly dresses on purpose to get me to do this!"
"What? No…" Sam said, sipping her coffee and avoiding Carly's gaze. "I would never do that."

"Hey, you guys," Freddie said before Carly could respond. "Check out this email I just got…it's about iCarly."

"Really?" Sam said. "We haven't done the show in four years. Why would someone be emailing you about it?"
"Maybe it's a fan, just wanting to see what we're up to," Carly suggested.

"The subject says 'internship'," Freddie read. "Wonder what that could be about…people can't be expecting us to give internships for a web show that hasn't aired in four years."

"Well open it," Sam said.

Freddie clicked on the email. "Dear Carly, Sam, and Freddie," he read. "I was interviewed for your internship position five years ago. While I am fully aware that your iCarly web show no longer airs, I am still interested in working in the exciting and innovative field of entertainment production. If it is of no inconvenience to you, I would like to ask if it would be at all possible for me to meet with you to get advice from you three on advancing in this field, given you success with iCarly. Looking forward to your response."

"Who sent that?" Carly asked.

"I dunno, there's no name at the bottom," Freddie shrugged. "I'm assuming it's one of those people we interviewed back when tried that whole intern thing."
"Could it be Brad?" Sam suggested.

"Nah, Brad would've just asked us in person," Freddie pointed out. "Besides, what does he need out advice for? The guy's a big shot engineer now."
"Well I don't see the harm in us meeting with this person just to give them some tips," Carly said. "We're all in the entertainment business, after all. Sam and I could tell them about our jobs as scrip writers, and Freddie, you can talk about what you do as an editor. It will be fun to help an old fan out."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "We can see if they can meet us tomorrow. Sam and I are free after one. We're gonna go pick out our wedding bands. Isn't that exciting?"

"Aw," Carly smiled.

"Don't all wedding bands look the same?" Sam asked. "They're just gold, aren't they? The engagement ring is the one that really matters, and I've got that already."

She held out her hand, showing off her sparkling engagement ring that Freddie had proposed to her with six months ago.

"Do I need to hit you?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes. "Sam, the wedding band is even more important than the engagement ring! You wedding bands symbolize you lasting love for one another! When you put them on each others fingers, it's the moment you truly become husband and wife!"

"Alright, alright!" Sam said. "I get it!"

"So I'll reply back, telling whoever this is that we can meet them at one then," Freddie said.

"Well hurry up," Sam said, looking at her watch. "Because we have that appointment with the bakery in half-an-hour."
"You still haven't picked your wedding cake?" Carly frowned.

"Sam's being extra picky with that," Freddie chuckled as he typed. "She wants the perfect blend of chocolate and coconut, and buttercream frosting that would be served to the queen."

"Well wedding cake is the whole reason people come to weddings!" Sam defended. "And I have to be picky! You would've been fine just getting that disgusting vanilla thing from that gluten free bakery your mom took us to. Don't you want our wedding to be perfect?"

"Hey, as long as I'm leaving with you as my wife, it's perfect to me," Freddie said, closing his laptop after sending the email.

Sam smiled. "Okay…that was kind of sweet." She leaned over and kissed him. "But seriously dude, let's move. If we get there late they may not let us do the cake sampling. We'll see you tomorrow, Carly."

"Yeah, just meet us here at one," Freddie told her.

"Good luck with the bridesmaid dresses!" Sam called over her shoulder as she pulled Freddie by his wrist out of the coffee shop.

…..

"Look at it, Carly," Sam said as she wiped a stray tear from her eye. She handed Carly her phone. "That's it. That's going to be our wedding cake. It's a five-tier German chocolate cake with alternating tiers of coconut and raspberry mix-ins. And the icing…oh, the icing. It's made from the purest milk made from cows who are milked only by professionals, and the butter and sugar are imported from the Netherlands! I tried a sample yesterday and I swear, I think I saw a glimpse of heaven."

"She fell asleep staring at that picture of it," Freddie grinned, wrapping his arm around his fiancé.

"Wow, Sam," Carly chuckled. "You didn't even get this choked up when you found your wedding dress."

"Frednub's the one who's supposed to get choked up when he sees me in it," Sam pointed out, taking her phone back. "Anyway, where is this chump we're supposed to be giving life advice to? It's one-fifteen now!"
"Come on, like you've never been late to anything," Freddie said. "Maybe they got stuck in traffic or something. Let's give them some time."

"I wonder which intern candidate it is," Carly said. "Hopefully not that weird chick who was obsessed with cotton swabs and white glue. She kind of freaked me out."

"Who knows," Freddie shrugged. "But so long as it's not-"

Just then the bell on the coffee shop door rang and Carly, who was sitting on the side of the booth facing the door, felt her jaw drop and her eyes widen. "Oh my God! Sam! Sam, I don't believe it! Look who it is!"

Sam and Freddie both spun around to look at the newcomer.

"No way!" Sam gasped.

"You've got to be kidding me," Freddie mumbled.

"Court!" Sam said loudly, waving over to the man, who was staring around the coffee shop like a lost puppy. "Court, over here!"

Court turned towards the booth. "iCarly!" he exclaimed happily, running over.

"Court, how have you been?" Carly beamed, standing up to give the attractive man a hug.

"Good," Court replied. "I had a bagel today! And…I spread the cream cheese onto it all by myself."

"That's so great, Court!" Sam smiled, hugging the man as well.

"I-I don't-what?" Freddie frowned. "What is happening here?"

"Freddie!" Court said, holding out his arms to hug him.

"Put your arms away!" Freddie snapped.

"Put them where?" Court frowned.

"I-You're the person we're supposed to be advising?" Freddie sputtered.

"Oh yeah," Court nodded. "That's me!"

"Yay!" Carly grinned as Court sat down next to her. "Oh Court! This will be so much fun!"

"But-But that email you sent us," Freddie said. "It sounded intelligent! You could not have written it!"

"Oh, my dad sent that email," Court replied. "He told me that it was time I find a real job. So he wrote that email and told me all I had to do was sign my name and send it."
"You didn't sign your name," Freddie said.

"Sure I did!" Court said, pulling a sheet of paper from his pocket, where his name was scribbled all over. "I have it write here."

"Aw, look at the way he makes his 'o's," Sam said, taking the paper.

"Give me that!" Freddie snapped, grabbing the paper from his fiancé's hands. "Before you start drooling. Alright, Court, let's just get this over with. If you want to work in the entertainment production field, maybe you can find a position as a coffee boy or something. Now goodbye."

"Wait! What's the rush? That wasn't real advice!" Carly said, putting a hand on Court's shoulder. "So Court, what have you been up to since we last saw you?"

"Well, I was a male model," Court replied.

"That's so cool!" Sam said. "Do you still model?"

"No, they fired me because I could get my shoes on the right feet for photo-shoots," Court replied. "But it's hard! Both shoes look the same!"

"Of course they do," Carly said comfortingly.

"And then after that, I thought I'd be a vet," Court continued. "But apparently you have to take a gazillion science classes for that, and, well, this may be hard to believe, but I'm not exactly good at science."
"Really?" Freddie sneered.

"Shhh!" Sam hissed, kicking him under the table.

"That's too bad," Carly said. "You would've made a great vet."
"I know!" Court nodded. "I don't know why I need science classes to be a vet. It's not like animals have gravity."

"Are you two not hearing this?" Freddie said, looking back and forth from Sam and Carly.

"So what's new with you guys?" Court asked.

"Oh you know, same old, same old," Sam shrugged. "We all work for this big T.V. company now, which is pretty cool. Carly and I write the scripts for a bunch of shows and Freddie makes all the digital edits and stuff. Let's see, what else…"

"You're engaged," Freddie commented.

"I was getting to that," Sam defended.

"Whoa! What's that?" Court gasped.

"It means," Freddie said, slinging his arm around Sam. "Sam and I are going to be married. As in husband and wife. As in-"

"I think he gets it, baby," Sam mumbled under her breath.

"Really? Because his track record shows he's so capable of comprehending things!" Freddie retorted.

"Married? No way!" Court grinned. "Congratulations! You know I have a cousin that's married."
"Small world…" Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Now, can we give Court his advice and be done with this? Look, Court, a job in entertainment production is a lot of work, and requires dedication and-"

"Wait, Court, do you happen to have any pictures from your days as a model?" Carly asked.

"Oh sure!" Court nodded. "I have them right here on my phone! You wanna see them? They're mostly of me at the beach, though."

"That's okay!" Carly said at once. "Let's see them!"

"Yeah, show us, Court!" Sam said.

"Why do you want to see Court in a swimsuit for?" Freddie asked Sam. "I can show you tons of pictures of me at the pool!"

"Um…I-I'm just…I'm really interested in men's swimwear," Sam said lamely. "Because-Because if you must know, I was going to, um, buy you a new swimsuit for your birthday, and I want to make sure I get you the most stylish one."

"My birthday is in eight months," Freddie pointed out.

"So I can't plan ahead?" Sam said as Court pulled out his phone.

Freddie groaned. "It's like life just looks for ways to pull cruel jokes on me."

"Wow, Court, these look so good!" Carly commented, scrolling through the picture.

"Thanks!" Court smiled. "Hey, I have to take a waz…do you think this place has any bathrooms?"

"Maybe it's those doors underneath the giant restroom sign over there," Freddie said.

"No," Court chuckled. "I said bathroom, not restroom."

"It hurts," Freddie moaned, massaging his temples.

"Aw, sweetie," Carly smiled. "Restroom is another word for bathroom."

"Wow! That's good to know!" Court said, getting to his feet. "They have those everywhere!"

"Alright good, he's leaving," Freddie said as Court started towards the bathroom. "Can we please ditch him or something?"

"What? That'd be so rude!" Sam said.

"Two weeks ago you told my mom her sweater looked like it was knitted by blind gremlins!" Freddie snapped. "You have no room to talk about rude! And why are you gushing over Court anyway? Have you forgotten that I, your fiancé, am sitting right here!"

"I'm not gushing over him," Sam said, rolling her eyes, giving him a quick peck on the kiss. "Come on, you know I love you. I'm just...being nice to Court."

"By drooling over his modeling pictures?" Freddie said, raising an eyebrow.

"Well I don't want to hurt his feelings," Sam shrugged.

"Man, he really hasn't aged a bit since we last saw him," Carly sighed dreamily.

"Hey…" Sam said slowly. "Carls, why don't you ask him out or something?"

"What?" Freddie exclaimed.

Sam turned to her fiancé. "Why? Do you have a problem with who Carly dates?"

"No!" Freddie said. "I just don't want this Court guy around at all, okay?"

"You think I should?" Carly asked, ignoring Freddie's comment.

"Sure, why not?" Sam said. "You've got a great job and he's pretty. He could be your trophy husband or something!"

"Well…" Carly said thoughtfully. "I-I do still need to find a date for your wedding. Maybe I can ask Court if he wants to go to that with me."
"You're bringing him to our wedding?" Freddie sputtered.

"Yeah, good idea!" Sam nodded.

"I mean, it's a little far in advance, but, well…you know what? I'm doing it!" Carly said. "I deserve a hot date at my best friends' wedding!"

"Do I get a say in this?" Freddie asked irritably. "Why does that idiot have to be at my wedding?"

"Baby, relax! Let it go," Sam said. "It's no big deal."
"No big deal?" Freddie repeated. "It's a huge-"

"You guys!" Court said, running back over to the booth. "You'll never guess what they have in those restrooms! This machine that just drops liquid soap into your hands! Magic, right?"

"Why?" Freddie sighed heavily, sliding down in his seat. "Why me?"

….

"I still don't understand why you're so wazzed off," Sam said later that evening, back at her and Freddie's apartment.

"I hate Court!" Freddie exclaimed. "That's why I'm wazzed off! You invited my mortal enemy to my own wedding!"

"Mortal enemy?" Sam scoffed. "What has Court ever done to you?"
"Well, for starters he destroyed my eight hundred dollar Pearpad by writing on it with permanent marker and blew up laptop with lemonade!"

"That was years ago!" Sam said.

"And he took off his shirt all the time!"

"Gibby used to do that too!" Sam pointed out.

"Well Gibby didn't make you swoon when he did it!"

"Freddie, you can't be jealous of Court," Sam said, sitting down next to him on the couch and wrapping her arms around him. "Come on, he's just coming as Carly's date…that's it. You know she just broke up with that Tim guy…she deserves to have some fun with a guy like Court."
Freddie didn't respond.

"I'm not attracted to Court, baby," Sam assured him, kissing his cheek. "I love you, not him."

"You sure seemed attracted to his stupid swimsuit pictures," Freddie mumbled.

"I have eyes, you nub!" Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I do notice things. You know that! You never say anything when I say celebrities are hot! You do it all the time too! You've said that chick in the silver bikini from Galaxy Wars is hot! And the girl in the toothpaste commercial, and-"

"Those are celebrities, Sam!" Freddie pointed out. "Everybody has celebrities they think are hot! But it doesn't matter because they're never going to meet those people! Court's somebody who you've actually talked with!"

"How many times do I have to say it?" Sam moaned. "Just because Court is a, um, decent looking guy, doesn't mean I want to be with him! I don't! Because in five weeks I'm about to be married to the best possible guy out there who is plenty attractive himself! Half the time we go out I have to get the butter sock out because I see other women gawking at you!"

"Nobody gawks at me," Freddie mumbled moodily.

Sam shifted herself so she was now sitting on Freddie's lap. "Baby, how much clearer can I be? I don't have any feelings for Court. None. I love you, not him."
She leaned down, kissing him deeply. "In fact," she said when the pulled apart. "Want to go into the bedroom so I can show you how much I love you?"

"You're just trying to distract me," Freddie said.

"Is it working?"

"Absolutely," Freddie nodded, wrapping his arms around her waist as he kissed her passionately. He got to his feet, Sam in his arms. Just as they were about to head into their bedroom, though, they heard their front door open.

The couple instantly pulled apart and Freddie set Sam back down.

"It's like nothing wants to go my way today," Freddie sighed as Carly walked in.

"Hi!" Carly said irritably.

"Whoa, what's up with you?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, what could you have to be upset about?" Freddie asked.

"I just asked Court to be my wedding date!" Carly said. "That's what's up!"

"Wait, he said no?" Sam frowned. "How come! Is he seeing somebody?"

"Uh-huh!"

"Well who?" Sam demanded. "He didn't mention any girlfriend at the coffee shop!"

"Oh no, he doesn't have a girlfriend!" Carly said.

"What do you mean?" Sam said, confused. "Then who is-wait…are you-no…it can't be. Are-Are you saying Court's-"

"That's right!" Carly nodded. "Apparently neither of us picked up on the fact that Court's gay!"

"What?" Freddie cried. "Are you-Yes! Yes! Yes! Oh, this is perfect!"

"Huh…" Sam said, crossing her arms. "Never saw that coming."

"It makes perfect sense, doesn't it?" Carly sighed. "I mean he's an insanely hot guy. I should've known it was too good to be true."

"What a rough break, kid," Sam said, patting Carly's shoulder.

"Rough break? Are you kidding?" Freddie said. "This is the best news ever! Huh…you know, maybe I never gave Court enough credit. Maybe we should all grab lunch with him tomorrow."
"Can it, will you?" Sam snapped. "You're just happy that you don't have to worry about me and Court anymore. Even though you never did in the first place!"

"I know that," Freddie said. "I was never worried!"

"Did you miss your little hissy fit five minutes ago?"

"Well, I just came by to let you know that as of now, I'm still single and alone," Carly sighed. "I'll let you get back to whatever you were doing now. I'm gonna buy a pint of cookie dough ice cream and try to accept the fact that I'll never have love."
"Have fun!" Freddie said brightly.

"Dude…" Sam said, shaking her head as Carly headed out of the apartment.

"What?" Freddie said. "Can't I be in a good mood?"

"You're unbelievable," Sam smirked.

"What? One minute you on my case about having it out for Court and now you're mad that I'm willing to be nice to him?" Freddie said, smiling.

"Cute," Sam said, turning and heading into the kitchen. "Real cute, Benson."

"Thank you!" Freddie called after her, sitting back down on the couch and kicking his heels up on the coffee table happily.