Balancing
"Ugh, my feet are killing me!" Carly announced as she stepped into her and Sam's shared dorm room. "I've been on them since eight this morning."
"Doing what?" Sam asked, looking up from her laptop.
"Well I had classes until ten," Carly said. "Then I needed to meet with a couple girls to go over the budget of our next social event. Then I stopped by one of my professor's offices to talk to him about possibly being a teaching assistant for the course next year, then I met a few friends at the library and worked on some homework. What about you? What have you been up to?"
"Thinking up ways to punish my boyfriend," Sam said simply.
"Uh-oh…what'd Freddie do?"
"We were supposed to web chat today!" Sam said. "We haven't gotten to all week because he's been busy."
"So you've just been sitting in here all day?" Carly frowned. "Didn't you have class at noon?"
"I went to that, mom," Sam replied. "It was a waste of time though. All the professor did was show us some slideshow."
"So you didn't hang out anywhere or do anything with anybody?" Carly asked.
"Well I was gonna ask you if you wanted to get lunch, but you were MIA all day," Sam shrugged. "Those girls across the hall wanted me to go get coffee with them, though."
"Well why didn't you go?"
"Eh, I didn't want to put pants on," Sam said. "Besides, I told you, I've been waiting for Frednub to call!"
"But isn't one of those girls in your creative writing class?" Carly pointed out. "You could've gotten friendlier with her."
"I swear, he better have a good reason for taking so long," Sam mumbled. "Mama hates waiting!"
"Sam…I-I'm a little concerned," Carly said slowly.
"About what?"
"You!" Carly said. "I mean we've been in college half a semester already and you-you've kind of been spending a lot of time just, you know, sitting in here."
Sam raised an eyebrow. "So?"
"Well it's just…come on, it's college, Sam! We're supposed to be doing all these exciting, new things and meeting new friends and-"
"What? You're trying to get rid of me?"
"Of course not," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You know I'll never find a spunky best friend like you. But-But that doesn't mean we shouldn't be making new friends. I just think that maybe you should try putting yourself out there more so that you can get the real college experience. I thought you said you were going to join that tap dancing club."
"I was, but I missed the meeting," Sam said. "I lost track of time while I was talking to Freddie."
"Well how about you join my sorority?" Carly suggested. "You can rush it next semester! It would be so much fun having you in there, and I can put in a good word-"
"I am not joining your sorority," Sam said firmly.
"Come on, you'd meet so many new people! All the sisters are super nice!" Carly said. "And-And you'd get to go on fun socials and make connections and go to cool parties-"
"You invite me to all the parties anyway," Sam pointed out.
"Well you never come!"
"Look, I don't want to join a group of prissy girls who obsess over make-up and dresses and only talk about stupid garbage…no offense," Sam said.
"Well…you have to do something!" Carly groaned. "Oh! I got it! One of the girls in my sorority has a brother who just started this new cooking club. It sounds really interesting; you make dishes from all over the world, and at the end of each meeting, you get to eat what you make!"
"Wait…you mane I get free food?" Sam said slowly.
"Uh-huh," Carly nodded. "So-So will you please just go to one meeting?"
"I-Fine," Sam conceded. "I'll go to the stupid meeting."
"Great, I'll tell him you're in," Carly said. "You'll like this guy. His name is Jeff and he's super sweet. Anyway, I'm going to go hang out in the lounge for a little bit. Wanna come?"
"For the third time, I can't," Sam said. "I'm waiting-"
"Oh, right, you're waiting for Freddie," Carly nodded.
"At this point, I just want to yell at him face-to-face," Sam said.
"Well, tell him I say hey," Carly said. "And don't be too hard on him."
"No promises," Sam said.
As Carly left the room, Sam let out a long sigh as she continued to fiddle around on her computer, waiting for her boyfriend's call. They had been in this long-distance relationship for two months now, and at first, Sam didn't understand the fuss everybody made over them. Her and Freddie would text off and on all day, they'd call each other at the end of each day and they'd web chat several times a week. As the semester wore on, however, Sam slowly began to realize how difficult this was going to be. For one, her and Freddie were in two different time zones. He was four hours ahead of her, so she always had trouble figuring out when the best time to call him was, and vice versa. Freddie was also beginning to get buried in his course work at MIT, and would sometimes answer her text messages with one worded responses hours after she sent them. And then of course, there was the point that Carly had made earlier. She was so busy trying to fit Freddie into her schedule that she hadn't realized hat Freddie had become her schedule. She never told Carly, but she would sometimes skip classes because those hours were the only times that Freddie had free to talk to her. She did want to have that college experience Carly kept going on about, after all.
But worst of all, though, there was the constant pain of not being able to see Freddie in person every day. She hated the fact that their last kiss had been two months ago. It was like some part of her was missing.
Finally, she heard her laptop begin to beep, and her web chat window popped up.
"It's about time," she mumbled, accepting Freddie's chat request.
A second later, Freddie's face appeared on her screen.
"Hey," he said.
"Dude! Are you kidding me?" Sam exclaimed at once.
"What?" Freddie frowned.
"You said you'd call six hours ago!" Sam said. "I've been sitting here all day waiting because I was afraid I'd miss you!"
"I know, I know, I'm sorry," Freddie sighed. "It's just I have this huge exam tomorrow and I've been at the library all day."
"So why didn't you just text me and tell me that?" Sam asked.
"I-I didn't think of that," Freddie admitted.
"Yeah, no chiz!"
"Look, baby, I'm sorry," Freddie said. "But-But I need to do well on this exam. I couldn't have any distractions while I was studying-"
"Distractions?" Sam repeated, her voice raising. "So I'm a distraction?"
"No!" Freddie said quickly. "No, that's not what I-"
"You know, I can't believe I sat around waiting for you all day like some pathetic little girlfriend," Sam snapped.
"Well I never said you had to sit around waiting for me!" Freddie defended.
"Sorry, I happened to be missing you, and wanted to talk to you!" Sam said. "Course you must not know what that's like."
"Are you saying I don't miss you?" Freddie exclaimed. "Sam, of course I miss you! I just don't have time to-"
"Oh, well I'd hate to waste any more of your precious time," Sam said coolly. "So I'll let you go."
"No, Sam, wait-" he started, but Sam had already slammed the laptop shut.
….
"Hey," Carly said the next day as Sam walked back into their dorm room. "So? How was that cooking thing? You did go, right?"
"Yes, I went," Sam said, shrugging off her jacket and tossing it onto her bed.
"Well did you like it?" Carly asked excitedly.
"Actually…it was sort of fun," Sam admitted. "I ate so much food. And I'm not half bad at cooking."
"That's great!" Carly smiled. "Did you meet anybody?"
"Yeah, all the people there were super cool," Sam nodded. "I met this one girl, Elizabeth, who made this delicious Chilean ham. And she's an English major like me! She even talked me into going to this bookstore with a couple other English majors next weekend to hang out. Oh, and that Jeff kid? He's so nice! I was talking to him after everybody else had left, and it turns out he's really into technology! I told him my boyfriend goes to MIT and he was all impressed."
"Cool," Carly grinned. "I knew you'd have fun, tonight. I'm so glad you went."
"Yeah, thanks for making me," Sam said. "I guess I did need to get out there a little more."
"No problem," Carly said.
Just then Sam's phone began to ring. She pulled it out of her pocket and saw Freddie's name flashing across her screen. She quickly rejected the call. Ever since their conversation yesterday, Freddie had been calling her nonstop.
Let him see what it's like to wait around for my call, Sam thought, tossing her phone onto her bed.
"Who was that?" Carly asked.
"Eh, just Freddie," Sam shrugged.
"You didn't answer?" Carly frowned. "Are-Are you guys fighting or something?"
"Or something," Sam replied, hoping Carly would get the hint and not push the issue any further. "Anyway, you know how I've been saying that my email keeps being weird and won't let me send anything?"
"Yeah," Carly nodded.
"Well I was telling Jeff that when I was talking to him, and apparently he knows how to fix it," Sam said. "He offered to come by and look at it for me. He'll be over later tonight."
"That's nice of him," Carly said. "I told you he was sweet. Hey, I'm go see if any of the showers are finally free."
"Okay," Sam said.
As Carly left the room, Sam sat down at her desk. She was about to log onto Splashface when suddenly a chat window popped up on her scree with Freddie's name.
Sam sighed. Maybe it was time to talk to him. It had been almost a whole day…
She clicked the accept button and Freddie's face appeared on her screen.
"Sam, hi!" Freddie said. "Hi, I've been trying to talk to you all day."
"I know," Sam said simply. "Sucks, doesn't it? When you waste a whole day trying to get in touch with someone only to be ignored…"
"Okay, I get it," Freddie said. "I-I'm sorry for what I said last night. I didn't mean it. I definitely don't consider you a distraction, baby. And I'm sorry I blew off our web chat date. Really. I just-I'm just having a lot of trouble balancing all my coursework and well, life, right now. I didn't tell you this, but-but I got my first ever C on an exam here last week and-and I guess it's just been getting to me."
"You got a C?" Sam said.
"I know it doesn't seem like a big deal, but-"
"No," Sam sighed. "I-I get it. I know how important your grades are to you. And-And it's probably tough there at MIT. You-You should be focusing a lot on your classes."
"But I also shouldn't just brush you aside," Freddie said. "I love you, Sam. And I want to make this long distance thing work. So…So from now on, I'm going to plan spaces in each day that will be dedicated to you. We'll figure out each week what times we have available and we'll commit to them. That way there's no confusion, no waiting around for the other to call…it will be perfect."
"Yeah…we could do that," Sam smiled. "It'd be easier than what we've been doing, that's for sure."
"Good," Freddie said. "Because I do miss you when I don't get to talk to you everyday," Freddie told her. "It's hard enough not having you here in person."
"Well just another month and a half till the semester ends and we're both home for break," Sam reminded him.
"I can't wait," Freddie said. "So…what have you been up to today?"
"Oh, Carly talked me into going to this little cooking group they have here," Sam said. "And you get to eat everything you make! And it's free!"
"Wow, sounds perfect for you," Freddie chuckled. "Did you like it?"
"Yeah, I met a bunch of people, filled my stomach…it was a good day," Sam grinned.
"Hey, speaking of food, did you get that email I sent you a couple days ago?" Freddie asked. "That rib place you love just released a new menu that I thought you'd like to look at so when we're home, you're prepared for when I take you there."
"What? Aw man, no, I didn't get it," Sam moaned. "I told you, my email's been driving me crazy! I can't send anything out and a bunch of my emails go straight to my junk folder. It's like I'm living in the stone age here!"
"Hmm, that's kind of a big problem," Freddie said. "You need to have constant access to your emails in case any of your professors send you something important. You know what? Let me see if I can walk you through how you could maybe fix it and-"
"Oh don't worry about it," Sam said. "I'm actually getting it taken care of. I met this guy at that cooking club who's a tech wiz, and when I told him about my email problem, he offered right way to come by and fix it for me."
"Oh…" Freddie said slowly. "He-He just offered?"
"Yeah," Sam nodded.
"And he's going to be there?" Freddie frowned. "In your room? Carly-Carly's gonna be there too, right?"
"Probably not, she usually goes to her sorority house in the evening," Sam shrugged.
"Okay…so-so let me get this straight," Freddie said. "You invited some guy you just met up into your room, alone, after he was so eager to help you fix your email? Doesn't that sound, oh, I don't know, like a guy trying to make a move on you?"
"What?" Sam scoffed.
"Sam, no guy just volunteers to help out some girl he just met without ulterior motives!" Freddie said. "He's probably going to go in there thinking he's gonna seduce you or something!"
"No he's not! He's just being nice!"
"There's no such thing as 'nice guys'," Freddie sneered.
"Dude, Jeff knows I have a boyfriend!" Sam snapped.
"Oh, well then problem solved!" Freddie said, his voice dripping in sarcasm. "Because no guy has ever tried anything with a girl with a boyfriend before!"
"Why are you being so paranoid?" Sam asked. "Do you expect me to just not talk to any guys while I'm in college?"
"No, I just assumed you'd use common sense and realize when a guy is obviously hitting on you and not fuel the situation more by inviting him to your room!"
"He's not going to try anything!" Sam said angrily. "So you're telling me that if some girl told you about a problem with her computer, you'd only help her out if you wanted to try and make a move?"
"No! But-But-"
"And don't you think that if by some slim chance Jeff did try anything, I'd shut it down right away?"
"Sam, I know you wouldn't do anything!" Freddie defended. "It's him I don't trust! How would you like it if I invited a hot girl up to my room and sat all huddled up together while we messed around on my computer, just the two of us?"
"I-I wouldn't care," Sam mumbled.
"Really? Well, you know what? I-I'm going to!"
"You are not!"
"Why do you care? You said you didn't have a problem with it!" Freddie retorted.
"I-You know what?" Sam snapped. "You're being a jerk! You're mad because I'm friends with a guy so you're gonna find some chick just to get back at me?"
"Well why would you go around asking other guys for tech help?" Freddie asked. "That's-That's my thing. Why-Why wouldn't you just ask me?"
"Because I was mad at you!" Sam blurted out.
"So you did this to get back at me?"
"No," Sam said lamely. "No, I-ugh! Can we just drop this?"
"Yeah," Freddie said. "Yeah, we can."
And with that, Sam's computer screen went black.
…..
The next morning, Sam was sitting in her bed, staring down at the framed picture of her and Freddie that she kept on her desk. She kept replaying their fight from the previous night in her head. When did this all get so complicated? she asked herself.
The dorm door opened and Carly stepped in.
"Hey," she smiled. "What's up? You went to bed pretty early last night."
"Yeah, I-I didn't feel like doing anything else, so, you know," Sam sighed.
"Are you okay?" Carly asked.
Sam shrugged.
"Is-Is this about you and Freddie?" Carly asked softly.
"I-Yes," Sam said. "I just…why is it so hard? We never had any problems when we were together in Seattle. Now it seems all we do is fight when we actually do make time to talk. And not our usual fighting…real fighting."
"Aw, Sam…" Carly said, sitting down on her bed next to her. "I know you must miss him and-and I know it's got to be hard for you two being apart like this, but-but it will work out."
"But what if it doesn't?" Sam whispered. "Everybody told us how hard it is to be in a long-distance relationship and-and we just thought we could defy the odds and get through it with no problem. But what it-what if we're just meant to fail like every other couple?"
"But you're not every couple," Carly told her. "You're Sam and Freddie."
Sam didn't respond.
"Hey, I gotta get to class, but-but let's get coffee after, okay? We can about this more then."
"Okay," Sam agreed.
"Oh," Carly said as she got to her feet. "When I walked past the front desk, there was a package for you."
"Really? What was it?"
"I dunno," Carly smiled. "Why don't you go see for yourself?"
After Carly left, Sam slowly rolled out of bed, pulled on an old pair of sweats and quickly ran a brush through her blonde curls before headed down to the lobby of the residence hall.
"Um, hi," she said to the woman at the desk. "My roommate told me I have a package here."
"Name?" the woman asked.
"Sam Puckett."
"Oh, so you're Puckett," the woman said. "Well, either your boyfriend screwed up big time, or he's just too sweet."
"Huh?" Sam frowned. "What do you-oh…"
The woman pulled out the biggest bouquet of flowers Sam had ever seen from under her desk and handed them to her.
"They were delivered at six this morning," the woman informed her. "I've seen a lot of flower deliveries, but none as big as this. You're a real lucky girl."
"Yeah, um, well, thanks," Sam said, accepting the bouquet. She started back up to her room, pulling out the small note card that was peeking out from within the purple violets.
Sam, it read. I know things have been difficult for us lately. I know this was all so much easier for us when we saw each other every single day. I know a lot has changed for both of us…but one thing hasn't. I love you, just as much as I always have, and I know that we can get through this. Together.
Sam felt a small smile creeping onto her face. Leave it to Freddie to send her a mushy, romantic gift less than twelve hours after a fight.
When she got back up to her room, she carefully set the flowers down on her desk before picking up her cell phone and dialing his number. He picked up on the first ring.
"Hello?"
"I got the garden you sent me," she smirked. "They're beautiful."
"Apparently the flower shop near you that I called has a fifty-flower-per-bouquet rule," Freddie said. "Look, Sam, about those things I said last night…I was out of line. I just…I miss you! I miss being there to solve all your tech problems and-and I guess the idea of some other guy doing it in my place just-I-I couldn't-I…anyway, the point is, I'm sorry."
"It's alright," Sam said softly. "I-I guess I can see where you were coming from. I mean, I know you're not the crazy jealous type. Besides, I guess I'd be a little upset if you found some random girl to, I dunno, eat ribs with."
Freddie chuckled.
"I really miss having you here," Sam said heavily. "I never thought it would be so hard not having you dorking it up around me."
"I miss you too, baby," Freddie said. "I guess…I guess we just hit a rough patch. I mean…all couples have them, right?"
"Right," Sam agreed.
"You know, I was thinking last night," Freddie said. "And you know what I realized? This is only our first semester of this. Obviously we have a lot to figure out about making a long-distance relationship work! It's natural to be going through what we are. But you know what? We're going to make it work. And then come next semester and the semesters after that, we'll be experts! We could write a book!"
"Maybe that could be my thesis or something," Sam smiled.
"Maybe," Freddie laughed.
"I guess you do have a point, though," Sam said. "We are both new at this. We shouldn't have expect it to go completely smooth. But…But, yeah, we-we'll make it work. We always do, don't we?"
"Always," Freddie said. "Um, listen, I have to go to class in a few minutes, but if you're free around six your time, wanna web chat? There's a new episode of Girly Cow on we could watch together."
"Sounds good," Sam said. "I should get to class too anyway."
"Talk to later then," Freddie said. "I love you."
"Love you too," Sam smiled. "Even if you're all the way across the country."
