Chapter One Hundred-Nine

Lily spent the rest of the week trying to keep her thoughts to herself. Every day she went to work, she was on edge, both because of raging hormones and fear for the safety of her husband and herself. She often found she was unable to concentrate, resorting to snapping out of turn at co-workers.

"Perhaps you are overdoing it, Lily," the Unspeakable she was training under suggested.

"Overdoing it?" Lily asked, annoyed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Simply that you... How can I put this?" the man, whose name was George Silverstein, said delicately. "You're pregnant, Lily. You shouldn't be putting your body under this amount of stress. Perhaps you ought to consider taking some time off-"

"And do what with myself?" Lily demanded. She instantly regretted her tone and sighed. "I'm sorry," she muttered, forcing herself to look at the man who was both a friend and a boss.

While staying at home certainly had its merits and would ease some of her worry, would it be any better for her to worry within the confines of her house about Severus when he went to work every day?

"How much time?" she asked weakly. "You do realize I've still six months to go before-"

"Are you planning on working when a child comes along?" Silverstein posed softly, pulling her to the side.

"I... I hadn't thought about it, to be honest," Lily admitted, feeling foolish.

"Your training can be resumed at any time. At least leave early today and take the weekend to consider it. The weekend is nearly upon us, so you will have some time to decide."

"All right," Lily conceded, agreeing it was the best course of action.

A few minutes later, Lily was stepping through the fireplace into her home. It was weird to not have Severus around, as he always was home before her. Sighing, Lily brushed the soot off of her clothes and went upstairs to change into something more comfortable.

Having a few more hours before her husband would be returning, Lily tidied the upstairs. She was walking down the short hallway toward the stairs with a laundry basket in one arm when she passed the door to Severus's old bedroom. Pausing, she used her free hand to turn the knob and watched as the door swung open. She stared into the abandoned room: a twin bed with a night table next to it, a single window with the curtains drawn shut, a wardrobe, and a desk with a chair. Setting the basket down, Lily entered the small room and ran her fingers along the desk's surface. She went to the bed and sat on the edge.

Closing her eyes, she tried to imagine the room redecorated for a baby. Not worried about where they would put Severus's old things, she envisioned a crib where the desk now rested, a mobile with little rainbows, perhaps, hanging from above. The curtains would need to be changed... something lacy and light. Feeling a smile creep onto her face, Lily opened her eyes and found that she had subconsciously placed her hands on her slightly swollen stomach.

Feeling better, she stood and exited the room, pausing only a moment to gaze back inside before closing the door and taking up the basket once again.

x x x x x

When Severus came home around five o'clock, he was greeted by the sight of Lily in the kitchen.

"Lily, what are you doing home already?" he asked, obviously concerned.

Lily smiled ruefully, wishing to ease her husband's concern. Going to him, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him before replying, "It's good to see you, too, Sev."

Having found some solace in the hours alone at home, Lily's mind was calmer. She could already see the wheels turning in Severus's head, though.

"You didn't lose your job, did you?" he questioned.

"Severus," Lily sighed, "can we please not worry for once? Merlin knows I've spent enough time worrying this week already-"

"What do you mean?" Severus asked, a crease forming between his eyebrows.

"I've been horrible at work, snapping at people left and right. No, I wasn't fired, and I didn't quit, but my boss suggested I take some time off. He was concerned about me because I'm pregnant, I think."

"If that's what he thinks is best, then of course you ought to rest. Lily, are you sure you're okay?"

"I just didn't want you to worry," Lily confessed. "I've seen the way you were already causing yourself distress, even if you kept it mostly to yourself. I can see that this whole Voldemort knowing the prophecy thing is really getting to you... and Dumbledore's suggestion... Sev, maybe it's not a bad idea to stay hidden."

"Spinner's End is hidden, Lily. Only a handful of people know where we're located, and as I already told Dumbledore, what does he expect us to do? Hide out in here for months or years?"

"Severus, please," Lily implored, her anxiety starting to return, "I worry about you every day when I'm not with you. You go to work; I go to work... A whole day passes, and then I hope to see you again come evening. What if- what if one day you don't-" she trailed off, unable to voice her worst fears.

Cupping her chin with his hand, Severus gently forced her face up, and he gazed into her eyes. "Lily, listen to me. Nothing is going to happen."

"How do you know that? Sev, he knows it's you! Can't someone else take it upon themselves to destroy these Horcrux-things?"

"Dumbledore and Regulus are both helping. Regulus has another lead, as you know. There's an Order meeting tomorrow night, so we'll find out the latest news then."

Lily nodded, not convinced. Her eyes were taking on a glassy appearance, so Severus drew her smaller body to his and enveloped her fully, his robes covering her.

"Do what you need to be happy, Lily," he murmured. "If you feel safer remaining at home, I see no reason why you can't."

"But what about you? If things got worse... I mean, really bad, would you stay home, too?"

"We'll see when the time comes."

x x x x x

Severus and Lily endured another Order meeting, where several members reported increased Death Eater activity across the country. This wasn't surprising, as sightings of wizards in Muggle newspapers could hardly be ignored. At first, it seemed a large faction of Muggles could continue along the vein of thinking wizards and magic didn't exist, but now it was becoming a regular occurrence.

Which meant the Order members embarking on missions had to be all the more careful not to be spotted.

As the time ticked away, Severus noticed that Dumbledore had been keeping the Order plenty busy, and much to his dismay, the headmaster hadn't informed him of this. Two hours had passed, and Severus felt his patience waning, knowing he would have to wait until after the meeting to learn anything new about the Horcrux situation.

Finally, Dumbledore said something that snapped Severus's attention back.

"It has been brought to my attention that Voldemort is now employing dementors, and in great numbers," the old wizard was explaining. "There were occasional attacks noted in the past, but he seems to be exploiting whatever powerful creatures he has at his disposal. Attacks this week have been in the south in Cornwall. The Order will need to start acting in this regard, and I ask that anyone who is especially proficient and confident in Patronus-casting to volunteer."

Something I can do, Severus thought. He's asked for volunteers, and if he's been keeping me out on purpose, now is my chance to get involved again.

Many raised their hands, including Severus. Dumbledore nodded in turn to each of them. Beside Severus, Lily's hand was raised, and he looked doubtfully at her, murmuring, "Lily, it's not a good idea for you to be going."

She actually glared at Severus. "Oh? And you are safe?"

"You're pregnant," Severus started to argue.

"Severus, Lily, we'll discuss this after the meeting," Dumbledore interrupted casually, but Severus wasn't fooled. The headmaster had his own plans for the Snapes.

Dumbledore was already in the process of forming groups to undertake missions. The Longbottoms were absent, what with having a small baby at home to take care of, so two new Aurors who had just joined the Order were being recruited for the cause.

Severus glowered at Dumbledore, and had there not been so many people in the room, he would have said something scathing. As it was, he didn't wish to make a scene and make himself look foolish, as Dumbledore was held in high regard by all of his loyal, fawning followers.

Glad when the meeting ended, Severus sat in his corner, watching people as they left. Perhaps it was the forbidding look on his face, but no one approached Lily or him, not even their friends. James waved, giving them, or Lily more likely, a small smile as he walked past with Mary, who was ogling Lily's stomach in a manner that irritated Severus even further.

When only Dumbledore, Lily, and Severus remained, Dumbledore said, "Well, I can tell you wish to say something, Severus. Go on."

I don't need to be given permission to speak.

"Why haven't you asked us to go on any missions lately? Or at least me?" Severus demanded.

"Now, just a minute," Lily interrupted. "Just because I'm pregnant-"

Dumbledore held up a hand. "Because both of you are in extreme danger. I do not wish to risk your lives unnecessarily. It is enough that you are pregnant, Lily, but you know Voldemort knows the prophecy and who it targets."

"You asked for volunteers," Severus spat. "Am I not allowed to go with you lot to Cornwall? We have two Horcruxes in our grip that can be given to dementors!"

"That is a risky business, and you know it, Severus," Dumbledore stated firmly. "It is true that I cannot stop you, but neither do I have to give you the details of where or when we will be going on these missions. It is best you both remain home-"

"Stop trying to tell us what to do!" Lily suddenly erupted, uncharacteristic of her. "Yes, we don't wish to have to hide away, and yes, I realize it's the safest option. You think I don't worry about Severus when he isn't at home? But you telling us what to do like we're incapable of deciding for ourselves is out of line, sir."

Severus stared at his wife in shock. She was a raging beauty, and his heart pumped wildly in admiration at her. This was the fiery Gryffindor he had fallen in love with. This was his Lily.

"I meant no disrespect," Dumbledore said evenly. "It is only out of concern that I say this."

"We've had a fair share of your concern, thanks," Lily scoffed, leaving Severus wondering how much of this was hormones and how much was actually her true self speaking.

Dumbledore continued as if Lily hadn't just spoken. "It should please you to know that Regulus is attending a dinner party at Bellatrix Lestrange's house on Wednesday. He hopes to procure the Horcrux, which is hopefully the Cup of Hufflepuff, as we don't know what item of Ravenclaw's could be one."

"Then let Regulus do his job," Severus sneered. "Since we have no place in your esteemed Order any longer, we'll be going."

"Severus, Lily, please," Dumbledore nearly pleaded.

"You tell us to hide and keep things from us," Severus stated. "You kept things from me in the past, and look where that got the both of us - dead. You trusted a boy in my other life, a boy, Dumbledore, to take on that knowledge alone, knowing he would probably die or at least risk dying in the process. Don't pretend to have developed a conscience now. Don't pretend to fawn concern for us when we both know that isn't the truth."

Dumbledore's face hardened, his eyes icy and blue. "You know where the exit is, I believe."

Severus took Lily's hand, and they left without another word.