Love's Journey 2
by Castlefan6
Authors Note This is the continuation of Love's Journey, originally authored by The Muse of Apollo, chapters 1-7 all following are work of Castlefan6' IF you haven't read the original Love's Journey please do so before proceeding with this,
I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only
Chapter 18
Previously
"Hey Jess, when you talk to Kate, don't make him out to be a total CAD would you, he's beat himself up for years"
"Sure Rick, she needs to know something's, but like you say, somethings stay between you and your brother"" as she smiles
Castle's Loft
Three Weeks Later
Rick is anxiously awaiting the courier that is on his way, courtesy of Kelly and FAP, containing the completed and pre-Final edited version of Lost Innocence by Alex Richards. Jess is sitting on the couch trying to be supportive but is getting dizzy as her eyes follow Rick walking back and forth, varying his step lengths, and strides. He repeats the steps over and over until jess said
"Rick, you're wearing the carpet out walking back and forth like that, why don't you come over here with me, let me try to relax you Sweetie."
Rick walked over, sat on the carpet with his back to Jess and in the V of her legs with his face still showing signs of worry. He doesn't know how she does it, but those small hands power deep into his tissue, massaging the knots out and he feels his body begin to relax.
Jess is smaller, but she has some power, and, in a few minutes, she feels his body begin to relax against her, so she leans down and kisses him deeply, "It'll be great Alex, just you wait and see"
"Alex? Rick replies, then it dawns on him that is the name he will be signing on all of the Innocence series, if they are fortunate enough to get more than one book published. The door chimes and Rick is there in a flash, signing for the delivery then making his way back to Jess.
"Well here goes my career Jess, hope we survive this, and the timing is right."
"Rick, look at me, I mean it, you are brilliant, the book is brilliant. "It's meaningful paying homage to a very brave woman, no more doubting thoughts, OK?"
"You're right Jess, I started the book for Rae, and even if it doesn't sell we still have the funding enough to complete phase 1 of the project, thanks to you and some great management"
Rick opens the package carefully, and out flutters a handwritten note from Kelly,
Rick, Jess,
Congratulations, the entire FAP family can't wait to launch this just as soon as you finalize the cover art and send me the dedication page that needs to be inserted. I marked it in both your copies. Marketing for once is clamoring for me to tell them when they can begin the advertisement campaign, rather than me having to threaten them, that's a great sign. Please review in its entirety and forward the dedication today if possible,
Thanks, and Congrats again,
Kelly
Rick and Jess have both been reading his note, and Rick is still in shock that the book is about to become a reality, as well as how he has been treated by FAP and Kelly. Jess is quiet as she places her arm around Rick and asks quietly,
"Do you want to be alone to compose the dedication, I don't want to stop your process"
"Angel, it's already written, I just had it in a separate file and didn't send it, would you like to read it?"
"In a few minutes, let's check out the book and cover options OK?"
Both are very impressed with the detail that has been paid to the book, even the font and ink choices reek of importance, and the cover art is breath taking. It is simple yet depicts the essence of the book. A teen age girl in tattered clothes sits on the curb shielding a smaller street boy and all that is shown is a shadow of a larger male in front of the girl in a menacing stance. Rick had been specific, he did not want to promote violence by any drawing or promotion and this art captured the soul of the book.
Both say at the same time, "I like this one," pointing to the same art,
Rick laughs and says, "It's settled, now all we need is the dedication,"
He opens his laptop and pulls up a file,
"To Rae, may you sing with the Angels, and grace your smile upon those who have a chance of restored innocence because of your courage, you are loved, and missed every day"
Jess is in tears as she finishes reading the dedication, "It's beautiful Rick, just hold me for a few minutes please? I keep thinking how lost I would be if it had not been for her and for Mother". Rick is holding Jess in his arms, offering comfort, but it touches him that Jess has now referred to Martha as Mother, yes, she is the Soul Mate he has searched for all his life, and maybe it's time, ** His thoughts are interrupted by the shrill of his phone, looking down he sees Kelly's face.
"Good morning Kelly, thanks for sending over the copies this morning, we just chose the artwork we want, and I have the dedication ready to send to you in an email you should have them both in the next 5 minutes."
"Fantastic Rick, I can't tell you how excited everyone here is. The plan is to let the first month go by as you just being the hot new author, then it will be conveniently leaked that it's actually Richard Castle writing under a pseudo pen name. Gina will have nothing to come back at either of us by that time, how does that sound?"
"It sounds great Kelly, just wish we could see her face when it's leaked, and that Black Pawn has lost their go to author, I'm sure it won't be pleasant in the office that day" Rick laughs
"Well I just wanted to make sure you got both your copies and you didn't need anything from us, once I get the email we will be full speed ahead' "
"Great Job Rick, really appreciate all of your timely updates, and revisions, it allowed me to adjust how we are going to approach the mechanics of this release. I'll let you go, give Jess our love as well, talk soon," as the line goes dead.
12th Precinct
Same time frame
Kate is busy, or appears she is, when she overhears Montgomery talking on the phone at Ryan's desk, apparently someone in the Federal Task Force. "Beckett a word," booms Roy, as he heads to his office.
"You wanted to see me sir?"
"Close the door and sit-down Kate, we need to talk", God how she hated those four words, the words that had cost her a chance at complete happiness with Rick, as she zoned out for a second.
"Yes Sir, about what?
"Well I know I asked you to push Ryan and Esposito, to take a leadership role, and I wanted to give you an update. You probably don't know this, but both have led task forces, that included FBI, DEA, and several other Federal Agencies over the last few months"
She actually did know since Mike kept her briefed, as an excuse to call her or meet with her for dinner or lunch, but she was sworn to secrecy.
"Both have done fantastic jobs, in fact our intel this morning from Virginia headquarters where the Simmons Orphans had hoped to setup shop again has been neutralized completely. I can't say how, but Captain Jon Seeley has been arrested, and enough evidence found to prove he was the mole in the 12th for over a decade."
"Also, the head shot caller has decided to cut his losses and relocate to another climate, we got word that 6 illegal houses used to stash and possibly make Meth were blown to pieces this morning all at the same time, eliminating the Simmons threat."
"Kate, let them know the brass are pleased, but not to slack up, still have another full quarter before promotions and I would love to see one if not both earn another rank."
"Yes Sir, and Thank You Sir"
"Oh, and Kate, I know Mike Reboddo keeps you informed, but I'm still your Captain and I have to follow protocol, "Roy smiles as he looks down and says "Dismissed"
It's almost lunch time now, and as Kate moves back to her desk she see's someone sitting in Castle's chair, What the Hell do they think they are doing and who do they think they are? She mentally stews. As she gets closer she realizes it's Jess.
"Jess what a surprise, is everything OK? Where's Rick? Nothing wrong is there?"
"Hi Kate, no nothing is wrong, I had to attend to some details at City Hall, and Rick is finalizing the cover of Lost Innocence, so I thought we could grab lunch, just us girls?"
"Great, let me grab my purse, where do you want to go?"
"There's that new sandwich shop just 4 doors from Remy's and it's a lot more private and quieter, plus it's not a cop place yet so no one will be constantly wandering by to pick up any of our conversation." Jess laughs
"Sounds great, lead the way" Kate smiles
Lunch proceeds with the usual small talk and Jess is right, no cops in the place at all so she doesn't have to be as guarded with her conversation.
"Jess I get the feeling there is something you want to tell me but are having trouble saying it, if that's correct, just come out and tell me."
"Well don't take this the wrong way, but I asked Rick the other night about some more information about Mike," Kate's face flushes full on and is obviously frustrated,
"I mean we know you two have seen each other for dinner and drinks, and just wanted you prepared in case things started to go deeper, I know how gun shy you are since that Detective did a number on you."
"Jess, we've had dinner once to plan out a recon mission, and drinks maybe 3 or 4 times, hardly a blossoming relationship" "Besides I could never have an interest in him that way, something about him just doesn't sit right and I'm not comfortable with even thinking of dating him."
"He keeps coming up with these bogus reasons we need to meet, but honestly after our last time, I don't think he will ask again"
"Care to tell me what happened Kate?"
"Well he brought up Rick, I know you and I talk about it, but it almost seemed like he was using Rick as a measuring device to gauge my interest in him, it didn't go well."
"I'm sorry Kate, Rick gave me the backstory of why he is so uncomfortable in relationships, seems he had a girl at home who he was engaged to, then shipped out over seas and fell victim to the lures of the street girls and finally the daughter of a rich businessman,
"All the while he was still professing his love for Melanie, his fiancé. It actually caused a rift between him and Rick when he was called out about how crappy he was treating her."
"Rick got a surprise leave home, and needless to say Susan, his girl was surprised but not in a good way. Rick said he knew about it for months, but kept loyal because that was his promise, and he could only control what he did."
"I guess Mike tried to make amends to Melanie, but she asked for the entire story, and to his credit he told her the entire truth, which ended that relationship. Rick said he's been on his own since then, never looking for anything serious, since he found out that Melanie married a guy from the neighborhood and had kids"
"Rick also said not to judge him too harshly he was only 20 when this happened and did a foolish thing."
Kate had been very quiet as Jess described Mike's past, then she softly said, "Now it makes sense, he asked me why I still love Rick, knowing that I could never have him, and that I needed to move on and be happy like you two."
"He asked you that point-blank Kate?"
"Yes, he did, and it pissed me off, it's none of his business who or why I love anyone, besides there was no spark, not even an inkling of one with him"
"I know what you mean, and Kate, can I ask you something, tell me to go to hell if you want but***"
"Jess you want to know how I can see you in Rick's arms, knowing you share a beautiful love, and not be envious Right?"
"Yeah, I try not to make it uncomfortable with you around but sometimes, I just lose myself in him, and there I go again"
"No Jess, it's fine, well it hurts like hell sometimes, to see you two in love but to know I only have myself to blame is the worst."
"I'm working on forgiving myself, and as I do that I am happy for you both. I'll take your friendship and seeing Rick happy any day over being shut out and shunned like either of you could have done, justifiably" she whispers
"Now are you still OK with that Jess? I know we talked about this briefly about 6 months ago, but if this hurts you, knowing I still Love Rick and probably will till the day I die, I'll walk away from you both rather than hurt you." Kate whispers as tears pool in her eyes
"You know I tried to hate you Kate, I mean I tried harder than I ever did in my life, and I just couldn't. You want to know why? Kate is surprised at Jess's honesty, but nods her head yes
"When I first met Rick, he was a shell, operating on fumes only driven by his family and a new-found quest to honor Rae, a girl I knew nothing about."
"We started very slowly, I know not what others may think but I think it was 3 lunches over the first month before he began to open up, and you want to know what it was that he guarded so deeply Kate?"
"It was you, once we started talking, I began to hate the name Kate, Kate did this, or Kate said this, or you should have seen Kate," Jess laughs softly at her imitation of Rick, causing Kate to laugh softly
"Then we got to the hurt issue, and as he said he felt like he was back on the streets again as a lonely little boy, with no one, I think that's when he started gravitating to me Kate"
"You may never believe this, but I think you could have squashed the love Rick and I built, if for only one thing, the hurt you caused."
"He can't separate love from hurt when he goes back to that time frame, I know he still loves you in a special way, but not a threat to his love for me so how could I hate someone he loves?"
"Does it bother me to know of your love for Rick, honestly it doesn't it provides a sense of comfort really that this sweet man who gives his heart out everyday is loved by you, and I know there is a love in him for you that no one will ever kill."
"Kate don't read anything into what I am going to say, but IF anything, ever happened to Rick and I, promise me you would be there for him, we both know he doesn't survive well alone, promise me that please" tears are in both lady's eyes now,
"Jess are you serious, really serious because I don't see anyone in my life that could compare to Rick, and I would rather be alone than with a substitute."
"Like I said, don't go planning on bumping me off, and I am fine, I am just trying to make sure the man I love, and my best friend who loves him too, know that should I not be in the picture they have my blessings."
Jess's attempt at making it lighter does nothing to ease as first Kate starts then followed by Jess as they sit embraced crying about something that may never come, yet united in their love for the same man.
A/N Leaving it here for now. Love to hear your thoughts I love reading your speculations.
